U*I7] HSIT7
, ; <. •
THE
LIFE OF TRUST:
BEING A
NARRATIVE OF THE LORD'S DEALINGS
WITH
GEORGE MtJLLER, £^4.
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EDITED AND CONDENSED BY
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'
EEV. H. LINCOLN WAYLAND,
PABTOR OV THE THIRD BAPTIST CHURCH, WORCESTER, MAPI.
Witls nn |nt
BY
FRANCIS WAYLAND.
BOSTON:
GOULD AND LINCOLN,
59 WASHINGTON STREET.
NEW YORK: SHELDON AND COMPANY.
CINCINNATI: GEORGE S. BLANCHAKD.
oar As interesting Letter from REV. DB. SAWTELL, of Havre, dated Bristol, Jec 14, 188ft,
havinpr reference to the subject of this volume, and designed as an INTBODUCTIOIT to it, will
be found in the Appendix, p. 477, to which the reader is specially referred.
Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year I860, by
GOULD AND LINCOLN,
In the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the District of Massachusetts
EDITOR'S PREFACE.
HAVING been requested by MESSES. GOULD AND LINCOLN to ex-
amine the work entitled "A NARRATIVE OP SOME OP THE LORD'S
DEALINGS WITH GEORGE MULLER," the Editor was convinced that
its republication in this country would greatly promote the piety of
American Christians. But to reproduce the work in its original form
was attended with difficulty. The "Narrative," in four parts, (pub-
lished respectively in 1837, 1841, 1845, and 1856,) and the four "Annual
Ecports" issued in 1857, 1858, 1859, and 1860, would occupy not less
than eighteen hundred pages of the size of those contained in this
volume. The cost of such a work would greatly limit its circulation
and its usefulness, if indeed any publisher should undertake its issue.
There seemed no alternative except to abandon the idea of an American
edition altogether, or to present it to the public in a condensed form.
Such a condensation seemed, on examination, to be entirely practicable.
Owing to the " Parts " of the " Narrative " having been published at
four separate periods, it often happens that the same matter is several
times repeated. A large portion of the space is occupied with the
acknowledgment of donations received. These entries, although appro-
priate in a report made to the donors and to the British public, have
vi EDITOR'S PREFACE.
not the same interest for American readers. The discussion of some
points in church polity, and the account of the Author's journeys upon
the Continent, though interesting and instructive, are not necessary to
the continuity of the history. Although in some cases the portions which
have been omitted cover a considerate period of time, yet it is believed
that all which is essential has been retained. No pains have been spared
on the part of the Editor to preserve the value of the work while reduc-
ing its compass, and to give, in a form universally accessible, a clear
exhibition of the wonderful results of the life of George Muller, as well
as of the principles by which his life has been governed.
Believing that the book would be rendered more attractive to the
reader, and more convenient for reference, the Editor has divided it
into Chapters, and has prefixed to each a brief statement of some of
the leading subjects introduced in the Chapter. For these " contents,"
as well as for the headings of the Chapters, and for the general title of
the volume, the Editor alone is responsible.
The "Narrative" of George Muller has been blessed in other lands to
the awakening of spiritual life. It was the means, as will be observed by
the reader, of greatly forwarding, if not of originating, the work of grace
now advancing in Ireland. " THE LIFE OP TRUST " is submitted to
the Christian public of America, in the hope that its still small voice
may be heard even amid the clangor of political strife and the revulsion
of commercial interests, and that it may be used by the Divine Spirit to
promote and strengthen in the hearts of American Christians, FAITH IN
HIE LIVING GOD.
H. L. W.
WORCESTER, DEC. 12, 1860
*:
frirxnuLBXTri
AUTHOR'S PREFACE
IT was only after the consideration of many months, and aflef
much self-examination as to my motives, and after much earnest
prayer, that I came to the conclusion to write this work. I have
not taken one single step in the Lord's service concerning
which I have prayed so much. My great dislike to increasing the
number of religious books would, in itself, have been sufficient to
have kept me forever from it, had I not cherished the hope of
being instrumental in this way to lead some of my brethren to
value the Holy Scriptures more, and to judge by the standard of
the Word of God the principles on which they act. But that which
weighed more with me than anything, was, that I have reason to
believe, from what I have seen among the children of God, that
many of their trials arise either from want of confidence in the
Lord as it regards temporal things, or from carrying on their busi-
ness in an unscriptural way. On account, therefore, of the remark-
able way in which the Lord has dealt with me as to temporal
things, I feel that I am a debtor to the church of Christ, and that I
ought, for the benefit of my poorer brethren especially, to make
known the way in which I have been led. In addition to this, I
know that to many souls the Lord has blessed what I have told them
about the way in which he has led me, and therefore it seemed a
duty to use such means, whereby others also, with whom I could
VIII AUTHOR'S PREFACE.
not possibly converse, might be benefited. That which induced
me finally to determine to write this Narrative was, that if the
Lord should permit the book to sell, I might, by the profits arising
from the sale, be enabled in a greater degree to help the poor
brethren and sisters among whom I labor, — a matter which, just at
that time, weighed much on my mind. I therefore began to write.
But after three days I was obliged to lay the work aside on account
of my other pressing engagements. Subsequently, I was laid aside
on account of an abscess ; and being unable, for many weeks, to
walk about as usual, though able to work at home, I had time for
writing. When the manuscript was nearly completed I gave it
to a brother to look over, that I might have his judgment ; and the
Lord so refreshed his spirit through it, that he offered to advance
the means for having it printed, with the understanding that if the
book should not sell he would never consider me his debtor. By
this offer not a small obstacle was removed, as I have no means of
my own to defray the expense of printing. These last two circum-
stances, connected with many other points, confirmed me that I
had not been mistaken, when I came to the conclusion that it was
the will of God that I should serve his church in this way.
The fact of my being a foreigner, and therefore but very imper-
fectly acquainted with the English language, I judged to be no
sufficient reason for keeping me from writing. The Christian reader,
being acquainted with this fact, will candidly excuse any inaccu-
racy of expression.
For the poor among the brethren this Narrative is especially
Intended, and to their prayers I commend it in particular.
GEORGE MULLER.
CONTENTS
INTRODUCTION
CHAPTER I.
gogljoob aitb gotttjj,
1805—1825.
BIRTH — EARLY DISHONESTY — INSENSIBILITY — CONFIRMATION IN THE
STATE CHURCH — DISSOLUTENESS OF LIFE — THE HARD WAY OF TRANS-
GRESSORS— THE GYMNASIUM AT NORDHAUSEN— THE UNIVERSITY AT
HALLE — ROVINGS 31
CHAPTER II.
&\t frobxgal's
1825—1826.
A TREASURE FOUND — DAWNING OF THE NEW LIFE — THE PEACE OF GOD —
"I AM COME TO SETA MAN AT VARIANCE AGAINST HIS FATHER" —
"LET HIM THAT HEARETH SAY, COME" — THE FIRST SERMON — DELIGHT
IN THE LORD— A COMMON ERROR — THE FOUNTAIN NEGLECTED . . . 38
CHAPTER III.
1826—1829.
PESIRE FOR MISSIONARY LABOR — PROVIDENTIAL RELEASE FROM MILI-
TARY SERVICE — VISIT AT HOME — LED TO THE LAND OF HIS FUTURE
LABORS — PROGRESS IN RELIGIOUS KNOWLEDGE —DESIRE FOR IMMEDI-
ATE USEFULNESS ..................... , ....... 47
CONTENTS.
CHAPTER IV.
on
1830—1832.
A DOOR OPENED— TOKENS FOE GOOD — TRUST EXERCISED IN THE STUDY
AND MINISTRY OF THE WORD — THE SWORD OF THE SPIRIT — TRUSTING
IN GOD FOR DAILY BREAD — BLESSEDNESS OV WAITING UPON THE
LORD — "OWE NO MAN" — "ACCORDING TO YOUR FAITH BE IT UNTO
YOU" — THE GIFT OF FAITH AND THE GRACE OF FAITH ... .68
CHAPTER V.
Hi griatol
1832—1833.
"HERE HAVE WE NO CONTINUING CITY " — CAUTION TO THE CHRISTIAN
TRAVELLER — NEW TOKENS FOR GOOD — THE WAY MADE CLEAR — MEET-
INGS FOR INQUIRY — NO RESPECT OF PERSONS WITH GOD — FRANCKE,
"BEING DEAD, YET SPEAKETH" — DAILY BREAD SUPPLIED — A PECULIAR
PEOPLE .... .80
CHAPTER VI.
Scriptural
1834—1835.
DNSCRIPTURAL CHARACTER OF THE EXISTING RELIGIOUS AND BENEVO-
LENT SOCIETIES— A NEW INSTITUTION PROPOSED— GOD'S WORD THE
ONLY RULE, AND GOD'S PROMISE THE ONLY DEPENDENCE — " IN EVERY-
THING LET YOUR REQUEST BE MADE KNOWN UNTO GOD"— EARNEST
OF THE DIVINE BLESSING ON THE INSTITUTION — BEREAVEMENT —
HELPER SEASONABLY SENT— REWARD OF SEEKING GOD'S FACE. . . 94
CHAPTER VII.
for gestitnte ©rp
1835—1836.
FBANKE'S WORKS FOLLOW HIM — A GREAT UNDERTAKING CONCEIVED —
REASONS FOR ESTABLISHING AN ORPHAN HOUSE — PRAYER FOR GUID-
ANCE — TREASURE LAID UP IN HEAVEN — IN PRAYER AND IN FAITH
THE WORK IS BEGUN ......................... Ill
CONTENTS. XI
CHAPTER VIII.
1836—1837.
AN UNEXPECTED OBSTACLE — IMPLICIT SUBMISSION — A SECOND ORPHAH
HOUSE PROPOSED — AN ENCOURAGING TEXT — THE NEW ORPHAN HOUSB
OPENED — COMPLETED ANSWER TO PRAYER — PROGRESS OF THE LORD'S
WORK — THE OVERSIGHT OF THE FLOCK 125
CHAPTER IX.
1838. .
THE MINISTRY OF SICKNESS — PEACE OF MIND— JESUS A PRESENT HELP —
DEEP POVERTY — PLEADING WITH GOD — UNITED PRAYEE ..... 138
CHAPTER X.
1838.
" PERPLEXED BUT NOT IN DESPAIR " — FAITH JUSTIFIED— A LESSON OF
OBEDIENCE — BOUNTIFUL SUPPLIES — SPIRITUAL INGATHERING — A 'DAY
OF MERCIES — TIMELY AID — A SEASON OF PLENTY — OBEDIENCE RE-
WARDED ........................... .... .151
CHAPTER XI
xng aitb gUcex
1839.
HELP FOR THE POOR SAINTS — THE UNFAILING BANK — MEANS EXHAUSTED —
LIBERALITY OF A LABORING SISTER — " HE KNOWETH OUR FRAME " —
REDEEMING THE TIME — GODLINESS PROFITABLE UNTO ALL THINGS, 167
CHAPTER XII.
J! 1 * it t g a n k 221 a it t.
1840.
A PURE OFFERING REQUIRED — A JOURNEY PROPOSED — SEASONABLE PRO-
VISION—LOOKING ONLY TO THE LORD — THE WRATH OF MAN PRAISING
GOD— A PROMISE FULFILLED — BENEFIT OF TRIAL — NEW SPRINGS
OPENED — BEFORE THEY CALL I WILL ANSWER — TRUST IN GOD COM-
MENDED—SPIRITUAL BLESSINGS 181
XII CONTENTS.
CHAPTER XIII.
Jfaiilj £5ir*n0ifjen£b bg <8 * * r e i s e .
1841.
A WANT SUPPLIED — RESOURCES EXCEEDING THE DEMAND — E TIL OF
SURETYSHIP — POWER OF CHRISTIAN LOVE — GOD'S WORD THE FOOD
OF THE SOUL — PREPARATION FOR THE HOUR OF TRIAL — POVERTY —
DEPENDING ONLY ON THE LIVING GOD 200
CHAPTER XIV.
8& a I k i tr g in Jl a r Ii it t * g.
1841—1842.
"GOD'S WAY LEADS INTO TRIAL " — GROUNDS OF THANKFULNESS — PRO-
TRACTED DARKNESS — CAST DOWN, BUT NOT DESTROYED — TRUST IN
GOD COMMENDED — THE MEANS OF ITS ATTAINMENT — REVIEW OF THE
WORK 214
CHAPTER XV.
|) r o g p t x i i jr .
1842—1843.
ABUNDANT SUPPLIES — RESTING ON THE WRITTEN WORD — "SEEKING AND
FINDING"— ERRONEOUS IMPRESSIONS REMOVED — PERSEVERING AND
PREVAILING PRAYER ANSWERED — " LENGTHENING THE CORDS AND
STRENGTHENING THE STAKES " — A FOURTH ORPHAN HOUSE .... 241
CHAPTER XVI.
1844.
EARTHLY AND HEAVENLY TREASURES — SEEKING THE KINGDOM OP GOD
— FELLOWSHIP WITH THE FATHER — THE CHRISTIAN MERCHANT —
EXAMPLES — MISTAKES ......................... 259
CHAPTER XVII.
1845—1846.
AN UNEXPECTED REQUEST — DELIBERATION — A GREAT UNDERTAKING —
EELIANCE ON THE RESOURCES OF THE LIVING GOD — AN ANSWEB
CONTENTS. XIII
EXPECTED AND RECEIVED — PRAYER FOR FAITH AND PATIENCE —
FURTHER PROOFS OF DIVINE FAVOR — THE BLESSEDNESS OF DEVISING
IJBEBAL THINGS 29*
CHAPTER XVIII.
*
cfsiilj Confxrnub bg JJrosperiig.
1846—1848.
THE SPIRIT OF SUPPLICATION BESTOWED AND PRAYER ANSWERED — THE
TIME OF MAN'S NEED AND OF GOD'S BOUNTY — FAITH NOT SHAKEN —
DEALING ONLY WITH GOD— THE NEEDED AMOUNT FURNISHED — PER-
PETUAL " NEED " — NOT WEARY IN GOD'S WORK — JOY IN ANSWERED
PRAYER — FOUR REQUESTS GRANTED — " CONTINUING INSTANT IN
PRAYER " — THE BUILDING COMMENCED — PERSONAL HISTORY — A
MARKED DELIVERANCE 319
CHAPTER XIX.
& o ntinn tb ^lercies.
1848—1850.
HUMBLE BEGINNINGS — DEVISING LIBERAL THINGS — THE ORPHANS PRO-
VIDED FOR — A MEMORABLE DAY — MONEY "AT INTEREST" — MEANS
FROM AN UNEXPECTED SOURCE — THE PROGRESS OF THE NEW ORPHAN
HOUSE— MEANS PROVIDED FOR ITS COMPLETION— INEXPRESSIBLE DE-
LIGHT IN GOD— REVIEW OF THE TWO YEARS PAST . , . 347
CHAPTER XX.
§i Jpjefcr sO'icforg of ^ait^*
1850—1851.
PAST MERCIES AN ENCOURAGEMENT TO NEW UNDERTAKINGS — A HOUSE
FOR SEVEN HUNDRED ORPHANS PROPOSED — WALKING BY FAITH —
COUNSEL SOUGHT FROM GOD — THE PURPOSE FORMED — DELIGHT IN
THE MAGNITUDE AND DIFFICULTY OF THE DESIGN 364
CHAPTER XXI.
"Sttfcarging |) rosp^rilg.
1850—1852.
DESIRES FOR MORE ENLARGED USEFULNESS GRATIFIED — A LARGE DONA-
TION ANTICIPATED AND RECEIVED — REVIEW OF 1851 — PERSONAL EX-
PERIENCE — BUILDING FUND FOR THE SECOND NEW ORPHAN HOUSE —
DOUBT RESISTED — WATTING ON GOD NOT IN VAIN — REVIEW OF 1852, 389
XIV CONTENTS.
CHAPTER XXII.
in log.
1852—1854.
EXPECTING GREAT THINGS FROM GOD— MUNIFICENT DONATION — INC&E AS •
. ING USEFULNESS OF THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION —
ACCESS TO GOD THROUGH FAITH IN CHRIST — A VrOICE FROM MOUNT
LEBANON — BENEFIT OF WAITING GOD'S TIME — CAREFUL STEWARDSHIP
— FAITH, THE ONLY RELIANCE — " THIS POOR WIDOW HATH CAST IN
MORE THAN THEY ALL"— GREATER ACHIEVEMENTS OF FAITH ANTICI-
PATED — COUNSEL TO TRACT DISTRIBUTORS — A NEW AND SEVERE
TRIAL OF FAITH 402
CHAPTER XXIII.
%\itt gears of |)rc
1854—1857.
THE SITE SELECTED — SIX THOUSAND ORPHANS IN PRISON — HOW TO ASK
FOR DAILY BREAD — REVIEW OF TWENTY -FOUR YEARS — "TAKE NO
THOUGHT FOR THE MORROW " — INSURANCE AGAINST BAD DEBTS .426
CHAPTER XXIV.
Conclusion.
1857—1860.
THE HOUSE FOR FOUR HUNDRED OPENED — PRAYER MORE THAN ANSWERED
— THE RESORT IN TROUBLE — AN OUTPOURING OF THE SPIRIT ON THE
ORPHANS — LAND FOR A NEW BUILDING PURCHASED — "BUT ONE LIFE
TO SPEND FOR GOD " — " SCATTERING, YET INCREASING" — A MEMO-
RABLE YEAR — THE GERM OF THE IRISH REVIVAL — LETTER FROM AN
ORPHAN — THE FRUIT OF SIX MONTHS' PRAYER— TUB RESULTS OF THE
WORK — REVIVAL AMONG THE ORPHANS . . . 446
APPENDIX 473
LIST OF ARTICLES CONTRIBUTED 473
AUDITOR'S REPORT FOR 1859-60 476
LETTEK FROM RE* DR SAWTELL 477
T7FJ7BRSIT7
NTEQDUCIION.
WHAT is meant by tlie prayer of faith? is a question which
is beginning to arrest, in an unusual degree, the attention of
Christians. What is the significance of the passages both in the
New Testament and the Old which refer to it ? What is the limit
within which they may be safely received as a ground of practical
reliance ? Were these promises limited to prophetical or apostoli-
cal times ; or have they been left as a legacy to all believers until
the end shall come ?
Somehow or other, these questions are seldom discussed either
from the pulpit or the press. I do not remember to have heard
any of them distinctly treated of in a sermon. I do not know of
any work in which this subject is either theoretically explained or
practically enforced. It really seems as if this portion of Revela-
tion was, by common consent, ignored in all our public teachings.
Do not men believe that God means what he appears plainly to
have asserted ? or, if we believe that he means it, do we fear the
charge of fanaticism if we openly avow that we take him at his
word?
The public silence on this subject does not, however, prevent a
very frequent private inquiry in respect to it. The thoughtful
Christian, when in his daily reading of the Scriptures he meets
with any of those wonderful promises made to believing prayer,
often pauses to ask himself, What can these words mean ? Can it
be that God has made such promises as these to me, and to such
men as I am ? Have I really permission to commit all my little
affairs to a God of infinite wisdom, believing that he will take
XVI INTRODUCTION.
charge of them and direct them according to the promptings of
boundless love and absolute omniscience? Is prayer really a
power with God, or is it merely an expedient by which our own
piety may be cultivated ? Is it not merely a power (that is, a stated
antecedent accompanied by the idea of causation), but is it a
transcendent power, accomplishing what no other power can, over-
ruling all other agencies, and rendering them subservient to its
own wonderful efficiency ? I think there are few devout readers
of the Bible to whom these questions are not frequently sug-
gested. We ask them, but we do not often wait for an answer.
t- These promises seem to us to be addressed either to a past or
to a coming age, but not to us, at the present day. Yet with
such views as these the devout soul is not at all satisfied. If
an invaluable treasure is here reserved for the believer, he asks,
j why should I not receive my portion of it ? He cannot doubt that
God has in a remarkable manner, at various tunes, answered his
prayers ; why should he not always answer them ? and why should
not the believer always draw near to God in full confidence that he
will do as he has said ? He may remember that the prayer which
has been manifestly answered was the offspring of deep humility,
of conscious unworthiness, of utter self-negation, and of simple and
earnest reliance on the promises of God through the mediation of
Christ. Why should not his prayers be always of the same charac-
ter ? With the apostles of old he pours out his soul in the petition,
* " Lord, increase our faith."
And yet it can scarcely be denied that the will of God has been
distinctly revealed on this subject. The promises made to believing
prayer are explicit, numerous, and diversified. If we take them
in their simple and literal meaning, or if in fact we give to them
any reasonable interpretation whatever, they seem to be easily
1 understood. Our difficulty seems to be this : the promise is so
*• exceeding great " that we cannot conceive God really to meao
INTRODUCTION. XVII
what lie clearly appears to have revealed. The blessmg seems too
vast for our comprehension ; we " stagger at the promises, through
unbelief," and thus fail to secure the treasure which was pur-
chased for us by Christ Jesus.
It may be appropriate for us to review some of the passages
which refer most directly to this subject : —
"Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find;
knock, and it shall be opened unto you ; for every one that asketh
receive th, and he that seeketh findeth, and to him that knocketh
it shall be opened." " If ye then, being evil, know how to give
good gifts unto your children, how much more shall your Father
which is in heaven give good things to them that ask him."1
In the Gospel of Luke the same words are repeated, with a single
variation at the close. " If ye, being evil, know how to give good
gifts unto your children, how much more shall your heavenly
Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him." 2
" I say unto you that if two of you shall agree on earth as
touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for them
of my Father which is in heaven. For where two or three are
gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them." 3
" Jesus answered and said unto them, Verily I say unto you, If
ye have faith, and doubt not, ye shall not only do that which is
done to the fig-tree, but also ye shall say to this mountain, Be thou
removed, and be thou cast into the sea, and it shall be done. And
all things whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall
receive." 4
The same promise, slightly varied in form, is found in the Gospel
of Mark. "Have faith in God. For verily I say unto you that
whosoever shall say to this mountain, Be thou removed, and be thou
last into the sea, and shall not doubt in his heart, but shall believe
i Matthew vii. 7-11. 2 Luke xi. 13.
8 Matthew xviii. 19, 20. * Matthew xxi. 21, If*
XV 111 INTRODUCTION.
that those things which he hath said shall come to pass, he shall
have whatever he saith. Therefore I say unto you, Whatsoever
things ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and
ye shall have them." J
Now I do not pretend that we are obliged to receive these words
literally. Unless, however, we believe the Saviour to have spoken
repeatedly on the same subject, at random, and with no definite
meaning, we must understand him to have asserted that thinga
impossible by the ordinary laws of material causation are possible by
faith in God. I do not perceive, if we allow these words to have
any meaning whatever, that we can ascribe to them any othei
significance.
" Verily I say unto you, He that believeth in me, the works that
I do shall he do also ; and greater works than these shall he do,
because I go unto my Father. And whatsoever ye shall ask in my
name,, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If
ye shall ask anything in my name I will do it." 2
" Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall ask the Father in
my name, he will give it you. Hitherto ye have asked nothing in
my name. Ask, and ye shall receive, that your joy may be full."3
" The effectual, fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth
much;"* that is, it is a real power, a positive energy. The
apostle illustrates what he means by availing prayer by the
example of Elias, a man subject to like passions as we are : " He
prayed earnestly that it might not rain, and it rained not on the
earth by the space of three years and six months ; and he prayed
again, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth brought forth her
fruit."5
The conditions on which prayer will be heard are in various
places specified, but particularly in John xv. 7 : " If ye abide
i Mark xi. 22-24. 2 john xiv. 12-14. » John xvi. 23, 24.
« James v. 16. * V. 17, 18.
INTRODUCTION. XIX
In me and my words abide in you, ye shall ask wJiat ye will, and
it- shall be done unto you." That is, if I understand the passage,
prevalence in prayer is conditioned by the conformity of our
souls to the will of God ; " if ye abide in me and my words abide
in you." On this condition, and on this only, may we ask what
we will, with the assurance that it will be done unto us. Faith,
in its most simple meaning, is that temper of the mind in the
creature which responds to every revealed perfection of the
Creator. Just according to the degree in which this correspondence
exists, is the promise made that we shall have whatsoever we ask.
It is evident, from the eleventh of Hebrews, that the views
of the Apostle Paul concerning faith were entirely in harmony
with the passages recited above. He reviews the lives of the most
eminent saints, for the express purpose of showing that the
impressive events in their history, whether physical or moral,
were controlled entirely by faith. He sums up the whole in
this remarkable language : —
" And what shall I say more ? For the time would fail me to
tell of those who through faith subdued kingdoms, wrought right-
eousness, obtained promises, stopped the mouths of lions, quenched
the violence of fire, escaped the edge of the sword, out of weak-
ness were made strong, waxed valiant in fight, turned to flight
the armies of the aliens ; women received their dead raised to life
again; and others were tortured, not accepting deliverance, that
they might obtain a better resurrection." We are, I think, taught
by this passage that the apostle believed faith to be a power
( capable of transcending and modifying every other agency, by
which changes became possible which to every other known power
were impossible. We see that in this catalogue of the victories of
faith he includes the subjection of almost every form of what we call
natural laws. The whole passage seems an illustration of the
meaning of our Lord, when he says, " If ye have faith as a grain
XX INTRODUCTION.
of mustard seed, ye shall say to this -sycamine tree, Be thou
removed and planted in the midst of the sea, and it shall obey
you."
It ^seems then apparent that the doctrine of the peculiar and
wonderful power of the prayer of faith is as clearly revealed in the
Scriptures as any other doctrine. It would seem evident, at any
rate, from the passages just quoted, that the Apostle Paul understood
the teachings of our Saviour to mean what they say. From the
general tenor of the Scriptures I think we may learn two important
truths : First, that there is a certain state of mind in a devout
soul to which God has promised all that it asks, subject, however,
as to the manner of the answer, to the dictates of his infinite
wisdom and goodness ; and, second, that in granting such petitions
lie does not always limit his action within the ordinary or
acknowledged laws of matter or of mind. I do not perceive how
we can interpret the passages above cited, as well as many others,
without giving them a meaning at least as extensive as this.
Why is it, then, that this whole range of revealed truth has so
generally been looked upon as an unknown and unexplored region ?
Why should we limit either the goodness or the power of God by
our own knowledge of what we call the laws of nature ? Why
should we not admit that " there are more things in heaven and
earth than are dreamed of in our philosophy"? In a universe
governed by moral law, why should not moral laws take precedence
of all others? Why should we deny that there is a power in
prayer to which we have not commonly attained ? We are
straitened in ourselves, and suppose that we are straitened in God.
We interpret the gracious promises of our most loving Father in
heaven by the rule of our own imperfect and unbelieving piety.
We ask for light from without, while the light can only come from
a more elevated piety within. We ask for examples of the effects
of faith at the present day, corresponding to those spoken of in
INTRODUCTION. XX*
the sacred Scriptures. Thoughtful men acknowledge that there
must be a meaning in these promises, which they have not yet
understood, and they see plainly that the kingdom of God can
never come with power until this prevalence in prayer shall have
become a matter of universal attainment ; and yet they dare hardly
believe that God is as good as he has revealed himself to be.
There have, nevertheless, from time to time, occurred, what
plainly appear to be, remarkable instances of answers to prayer.
Many of them have faded from recollection, with the genera-
tion in which they occurred; those which are remembered, how-
ever, seem to teach us that God is a living God now as truly as
in times past. The history of persecutions is always filled with
remarkable answers to prayer. The rescue of Peter from the
power of the Sanhedrim in one case, and from the power of Herod
in another, has been a thousand times repeated in the history of
the church of Christ. The answer to prayer for divine direction
as to the time and manner of performing some Christian service,
to which an individual has felt himself specially called, has fre-
quently been very remarkable. The biographies of the early anc
of many of the later Friends are replete with such instances. Any
one who will read the edifying memoirs of George Fox, John
Woolman, William Allen, and Stephen Grellet, will find what I
have alluded to abundantly exemplified. The well-authenticated
accounts of the late revivals in this country and in Ireland teach
us that most remarkable instances of answers to prayer were of
almost daily occurrence. In the last century a single instance
deserves particular remembrance ; it was the founding of Franke's
Orphan House at Halle. It seemed to him to be a Christian duty
to attempt something for the relief of orphans, and he commenced
the undertaking. From time to time, as the number of applicants
increased, the means for their support was provided, in answer, as
he firmly believed, to fervent and unceasing prayer. Thus an ex-
XXII INTRODUCTION.
tensive establishment was reared, which has continued to the
present day, providing education and support for thousands of the
poor and destitute, and it has been for a century and a half one of
the most honored of the charitable institutions of the continent of
Europe.
The most remarkable instance of the efficacy of prayer with
which I am acquainted, is that recorded in the following pages. It
seems, in fact, to be a practical illustration of the meaning of those
passages of Scripture which I have already recited. A young
German Christian, friendless and unknown, is conscious of what he
believes to be a call from the Lord to attempt something for the
benefit of the poor vagabond children of Bristol. He is at this
time preaching the gospel to a small company of believers, from
whom, at his own suggestion, he receives no salary, being supported
day by day by the voluntary offerings of his brethren. Without
the promise of aid from any being but God, he commences his
work. In answer to prayer, funds are received as they are needed,
and the attempt succeeds beyond his expectation. After a few
years he is led to believe that God has called him to establish a
house for the maintenance and education of orphans. He was
impelled to this effort, not only from motives of benevolence, but
from a desire to convince men that God was a LIVING GOD, as
ready now as ever to answer prayer ; and that, in the discharge
of any duty to which he calls us, we may implicitly rely upon
his all-sufficient aid in every emergency.
Mr. Miiller was led to undertake this work in such a manner
that aid could not be expected from any being but God. He did
not of course expect God to create gold and silver and put them
into his hands. He knew, however, that God could incline the
hearts of men to aid him, and he believed, if the thing that he at-
tempted was of Him, that he would so incline them, in answer to
prayer, as his necessities should require. Most men in making
Mrh an attempt WDuld have spread the case before the public.
INTRODUCTION. X.XTI1
employed agents to solicit in its behalf, and undertaken nothing
until funds adequate to the success of the enterprise had been
already secured. But Mr. Miiller, true to his principles, would do
no such thing. From the first day to the present moment he has
neither directly nor indirectly solicited either of the public or of an
individual a single penny. As necessities arose he simply laid his
case before God and asked of him all that he needed, and the
supply has always been seasonable and unfailing.
The conductors of benevolent enterprises generally consider it
important to publish the names of donors, appealing thus to what
is considered an innocent desire in man to let our good deeds be
known, and thus also to stimulate others to do likewise. Ignoring
every motive of this kind, Mr. Miiller made it his rule to publish
the name of no contributor. When the name was known to him,
which, however, was not often the case, he made a private acknowl-
edgment ; while in his printed account he only made known the
sum received, and the date of its reception. In this manner, for-
saking every other reliance but God, and in childlike simplicity
looking to him alone for the supply of every want, all that he
needed was furnished as punctually as if, in possession of millions,
he had drawn from time to time on his banker.
Thus has he continued from, I think, the year 1834. By degrees
the establishment increased, and it was necessary to leave the hired
houses in which the children had thus far been accommodated.
Laud was purchased, and a building was erected in the vicinity of
Bristol. This was soon filled to overflowing, and another building
was demanded. This was erected, and it also was very soon filled.
These buildings were sufficient to accommodate seven hundred
orphans. At the present moment, a third building, larger than
either, is in the process of erection, and is to be finished in the course
of the ensuing summer. When this shall be completed, accommo-
dations will have been provided for eleven hundred and fifty
orphans. These expensive buildings have been erected ; the land
XXIV INTRODUCTION.
has been purchased on which they stand ; this multitude of children
has been clothed and fed and educated ; support and remuneration
have been provided for all the necessary teachers and assistants,
and all this has been done by a man who is not worth a dollar. He
has never asked any one but God for whatever they needed, and
from the beginning they have never wanted a meal, nor have they
ever allowed themselves to be in debt. There seems in this to be
something as remarkable as if Mr. Miiller had commanded a
sycamine tree to be removed and planted in the sea, and it had
obeyed him.
But this is not all. Mr. Miiller saw that there was a great demand
for copies of the Holy Scriptures, both in Great Britain and on
the Continent, and he commenced the work of Bible distribution.
This so rapidly extended itself that he was soon obliged to open in
Bristol a large Bible House. He believed that great good might
be done by the circulation of religious tracts, and he has carried
on this work extensively. He was moved to make an attempt to
aid and even to support missionaries among the heathen, as well as
other good men, of various denominations, who, with very inade-
quate means of living, were preaching the gospel to the poor and
destitute at home. He began to aid them as their necessities came
to his knowledge, and now one hundred such men are depending
on him, wholly or in part, for support.
Here, then, we certainly behold a remarkable phenomenon. A
single man, wholly destitute of funds, is supporting and educating
seven hundred orphans, providing everything needful for their
education, is in himself an extensive Bible and Tract and Mission-
ary Society, the work is daily increasing in magnitude, and the
means for carrying it on are abundantly supplied, while he is con-
nected with no particular denomination, is aided by no voluntary
association, and he has asked the assistance of not a single indi-
vidual. He has asked no one but God, and all his wants have been
'egularly supplied. In these labors of love he has, up to the
INTRODUCTION. XXV
present time, expended nearly a million of dollars. It is thus that
he has endeavored to show to an unbelieving -world thai God is a
living God, and that he means what he has said in every one of his
promises.1
I have referred to Mr. Miiller as if he were the sole agent in this
work. This, however, is by no means true. His co-workers in the
Institution are all of the same spirit as himself. Mr. Craik, a gen-
tleman from Scotland, has been with him from the beginning, has
shared in all the labors and responsibilities of these vast undertak-
ings, and has been specially blessed as a preacher of the gospel. The
remuneration of all the assistants is contingent on the means
received in answer to prayer. When sacrifices are to be made, they
are all prompt to make them, and they do not expect an answer to
prayer until they have contributed, from their own scanty wages,
whatever can be spared after providing for their actual necessities.
The last Report of Mr. Miiller's labors has just been received.
From this we learn another interesting fact. It seems that the
i The following brief statistics will show the magnitude of the work already
accomplished : —
The number of pupils hitherto instructed in all the day, evening, and Sunday
schools, is 13,124. The whole number of orphans educated within the establish-
ment is 1,153. Of the 700 now in the Institution, 200 are hopefully pious. Mis-
sionaries aided at the present time, 100. Since 1834 there have been circulated,
— Bibles, 24,708; Testaments, 15,100; Psalms, 719 ; other portions of Scripture,
1,876; or, total, 42,463 Bibles or portions of Scripture. Tracts and books (not
pages, but separate publications), 11,493,174.
Two large buildings have been erected, a third is in the process of erection;
the land on which they stand has been purchased. The expense of the orphan
work alone has amounted to £133,528 sterling, and the expenses are daily
increasing.
The contributions by which these expenditures have been met have been sent
from every quarter of the globe. The largest amounts have been as might be
expected, from England, Scotland, Ireland, and Wales ; but to these may b*
added the Cape of Good Hope, Mt. Lebanon, Demerara, Newport, R. I., New
York, Philadelphia, California, France, Holland, Sardinia, Australia, etc., et».
C
XXVI INTRODUCTION.
late revival in Ireland is indirectly connected with these labors in
Bristol. A pious young Irishman read " The Dealings of the
Lord with George Miiller," and received from it new views of the
power of believing prayer. He felt the need of prayer for the
perishing around him, and determined by prayer and conversation
to labor for their salvation. First, however, he asked that God
would give him an associate. This prayer was granted. These
two then united in earnest prayer for some additions to their num-
ber. This prayer was granted. In this manner a small company
was united in asking for an outpouring of the Holy Spirit on their
neighborhood. They devoted themselves to prayer and to labor
among the people by whom they were surrounded. Their prayers
were answered. The Spirit was poured out ; twenty-five souls were
converted. Multitudes united with them in supplication. They went
from place to place, praying and laboring for the conversion of men ;
and thus the work extended, until the whole district of Ulster was
visited with that remarkable outpouring of the Holy Spirit.
All these we suppose to be indisputable facts. If in any respect
there has been a misstatement, or even an exaggeration, the means
are abundant for detecting it. The whole work has been carried
on in the presence and under the inspection of the whole city of
Bristol. There stand those large and expensive buildings. There
are seen the seven hundred orphans who are in every respect
admirably cared for. Everything has been paid for, for Mr. Miil-
ler is never in debt. His poverty is well known, and he will not
accept of any money as a provision for his future necessities. His
accounts have been annually audited by a competent committee.
There is not the man living who can contradict his assertion, " I
never asked aid from a single individual." Hundreds weekly visit
the Institution, and no one has ever found in it anything at vari-
ance with Mr. Miiller's published statements. Last of all, the Rev.
Dr. Sawtelle, a gentleman known to thousands in this country, has
added his independent testimony to the truth of all that is her«
INTRODUCTION. XXVII
related. More conclusive evidence to the truth of facts cannot be
desired. (See Appendix, p. 477.)
To account for a fact is to refer it to some general law whose
existence is already established. When it is therefore asked, How
shall these facts be accounted for ? we inquire, to what known law
can they be referred ? They cannot certainly be referred to any
known law of human action. How would we decide if a similar
case should occur in physics ? Suppose a series of experiments
should be made daily for twenty-five years in chemistry or mechan-
ics, with the same invariable result, and this result could be referred
to rvo previously established law, — to what conclusion should we
arrive ? There could be but one conclusion, in which all men of
science would unite. They would all declare that a new law had
been discovered, and would modify their systems accordingly. It
seems to me that on all sound philosophical principles we are bound
to come to the same conclusion in the present case. We can refer
these facts to no other law than to that announced by the Saviour
in his promise to answer the prayer of faith. There is no reason
to suppose that in the case of Mr. Muller and his associates there
is anything exceptional or peculiar. What God has done for them
we cannot doubt that, under the same conditions, he will do for
every other believing disciple of Christ.
What, then, are the conditions of this remarkable experiment,
if such we may call it ? They are something like the following.
A poor and unknown man is convinced that it is his duty, as a ser-
vant of Christ, to labor in several ways for the relief of the tem-
poral and spiritual wants of the ignorant and destitute. He conse-
crates himself to the work by dedicating to, it his time and labor,
and whatever pecuniary means should come into his possession.
He resolved that he would neither appeal to any of the ordinary
motives which dispose men to humanity, nor even solicit aid from
any human being, but simply make his wants known to God,
believing that, if he was doing the work of God, the divine promise
XXVIII INTRODUCTION.
Was pledged in his behalf. Not only did he trust in God that all
the pecuniary aid which he needed would be furnished, but that,
in answer to prayer, all needed wisdom would be given him in the
conduct of his complicated and arduous undertakings. The result
has met his most sanguine expectations. The institution has
increased to a most magnificent charity, aside from its missionary,
Bible, and tract operations ; all its wants have been from time to
time supplied; and it is at the present moment carried on upon
precisely the same principles on which it commenced. We can-
not resist the conclusion that if any one will undertake any other
Christian work in a similar spirit, and on the same principles, his
labor will be attended with a similar result.
While we believe this, however, we do not pretend to affirm that
just such immediate results will always be seen. This would be to
limit the omniscience of God by the short-sighted ignorance of
man. It may best suit the purposes of infinite goodness to answer
the prayer of faith by crosses and disappointments ; but these in
the end shall be found in the most signal manner to promote the
object to be accomplished. While the disciples were praying and
laboring for the extension of the kingdom of Christ in 'Jerusalem,
it seemed a strange answer to prayer that they should be driven out
of the city ; but the meaning of it was evident when churches
arose in Phenice and Cyprus and Antioch, and it became manifest
that the gospel was designed not for Jews alone, but for the whole
family of man. Paul devoted himself with unquenchable zeal to
the salvation of men, and, with a fervid eloquence which has given
him a place among the noblest orators of antiquity, delighted to
spend his life in persuading men to be reconciled to God. He wag
a man whose confidence in God was as unshaken as any whose his-
tory has been recorded by the pen of inspiration. It doubtless was
to the disciples of that age, as well as to himself, a most unaccount-
able dispensation that he should have been impeded in his great
work by the necessity of composing dissensions and rectifying
INTRODUCTION. XXI*
errors which were constantly arising in the churches which he had
planted, and, most of all, that so many years of his life should have
been spent in prison. Yet it is to these, at the time untoward cir-
cumstances, that we owe the writing of those epistles which occupy
so large a portion of the volume of inspiration, and without which
the message of God to man would not have been completed. In no
other way could his prayer to be useful to the cause of Christ have
been so fully answered.
With this understanding of the promise granted to the prayer of
faith, I do not see why we should not take the case of Mr. Miiller as
an example for our imitation. Whoever attains to this same simple
desire in all things to do the will of God, and to the same child-
like trust in his promises, may, I think, hope for a similar blessing.
God is no respecter of persons. " If any man do his will, him he
heareth." And all the teaching of the Scriptures confirms us in
this belief. The passages which we have quoted at the commence-
ment of this paper, with hundreds of others, all lead to the same
conclusion. In the Scriptures every form of illustration is used to
impress upon us the conviction that God is indeed our Father, and
that he delights to grant our requests for anything that is for our
benefit, and specially that he pledges himself to direct by his coun-
sel, and aid by his providence, every one who honestly labors to
promote the cause of true benevolence and real religion.
If this be so, how important is this subject in its bearing on indi-
vidual effort. No Christian, though the poorest and humblest, ever
need despair of doing a noble work for God. He need never wait
until he can obtain the co-operation of the multitude or the
wealthy. Let him undertake what he believes to be his duty, on
ever so small a scale, and look directly to God for aid and direction.
If it be a seed which God has planted, it will take root, grow, and
bear fruit, " having seed within itself." " It is better to trust in God
than to put confidence in man ; it is better to trust in God than to
C*
INTRODUCTION.
put confidence in princes." A multitude of cases can be adduced to
prove that this course is in harmony with the designs of God. It
is abundantly shown in the case of Mr. Miiller. Take the case of
Robert Raikes. Suppose that he had established no school until a
powerful association, formed from ecclesiastical dignitaries, mil-
lionaires, and the multitude, had united in his support, his effort
could hardly have escaped ridiculous failure. On the contrary, he
simply established a school by himself. It was a seed which God
had planted, and its fruit now shakes like Lebanon.
On the contrast which is seen between the plan of Mr. Miiller
and the plans by which our missionary and other benevolent opera-
tions are conducted, it is unnecessary to enlarge. If Mr. Miiller is
right, I think it is evident that we are all wrong. We cannot go
into this subject in detail. We may, however, be permitted to
remark, that the means which are frequently employed to secure
the approbation and pecuniary aid of worldly men, in carrying
forward the cause of Christ, are intensely humiliating. It would
seem as though God was the last being to be relied on in carrying
forward the work which he has given us to do.
But it is time to bring these remarks to a close. We commend
this most unpretending of narratives to the thoughtful consideration
of Christians of all denominations. We have greatly overrated
the teaching of these facts, if they do not furnish strong incentives
to A LIFE OF HOLY EXERTION, AND IMPART AN UNWONTED
AND POWERFUL MOTIVE TO EABNEST AND BELIEVING PRAYER.
PROVIDENCE, December 17, 1360
THE LIFE OF TRUST.
CHAPTEE I.
BOYHOOD AND YOUTH.
1805 — 1825.
BIRTH — EARLY DISHONESTY — INSENSIBILITY — CONFIRMATION IN THH
STATE CHURCH — DISSOLUTENESS OF LIFE — THE HARD WAY OF TRANS-
GRESSORS—THE GYMNASIUM AT NORDHAUSEN— THE UNIVERSITY AT
HALLE — ROVINGS.
I WAS born at Kroppenstaedt, near Halberstadt, in the
kingdom of Prussia, September 27, 1805. In January,
1810, my parents removed to Heimersleben, about four
miles from Kroppenstaedt, where my father was appointed
collector in the excise.
My father, who educated his children on worldly prin-
ciples,1 gave us much money, considering our age. The
result was, that it led me and my brother into many sins.
Before I was ten years old, I repeatedly took of the gov
ernment money which was intrusted to my father, and
which he had to make up ; till one day, as he had repeat-
1 The opinion is often entertained that persons who become eminent for
power in prayer and nearness of communion with God, owe their attain-
ments to natural excellence of character, or to peculiarly favoring circum-
stances of early education. The narrative of the youth of Miiller exhibits the
fallaciousness of this view, and shows that the attainments which he made
are within the reach of any one who will " ask of God, that giveth to all men
liberally ani upbraideth not." — ED.
J52 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. L
edly missed money, he detected my theft, by depositing a
counted sum in the room where I was, and leaving me to
myself for a while. Being thus left alone, I took some of
the money, and hid it under my foot in my shoe. When
my father, after his return, had counted and missed the
money, I was searched and my theft detected.
When I was between ten and eleven years of age I was
sent to Halberstadt, there to be prepared for the univer-
sity ; for my father's desire was that I should become a
clergyman ; not, indeed, that thus I might serve God, but
that I might have a comfortable living. My time was now
spent in studying, reading novels, and indulging, though so
young, in sinful practices. Thus it continued till I was
fourteen years old, when my mother was suddenly re-
moved. The night she was dying, I, not knowing of her
illness, was playing at cards till two in the morning, and
on the next day, being the Lord's day, I went with some
of my companions in sin to a tavern, and then we went
about the streets half intoxicated.
This bereavement made no lasting impression on my
mind. I grew worse and worse. Three or four days
before I was confirmed, and thus admitted to partake of
the Lord's Supper, I was guilty of gross immorality ; and
the very day before my confirmation, when I was in the
vestry with the clergyman to confess my sins, after a
formal manner, I defrauded him ; for I handed over to him
only the twelfth part of the fee which my father had given
me for him. In this state of heart, without prayer, with-
out true repentance, without faith, without knowledge of
the plan of salvation, I was confirmed, and took the Lord's
Supper, OP the Sunday after Easter, 1820. Yet I was not
without some feeling about the solemnity of the thing, and
stayed at home in the afternoon and evening, whilst the
other boys and girls, who had been confirmed with me,
walked about in the fields.
1821. BOYHOOD AND YOUTH. 33
My time till midsummer, 1821, was spent partly in study,
but in a great degree in playing the piano-forte and guitar,
reading novels, frequenting taverns, forming resolutions to
become different, yet breaking them almost as fast as they
were made. My money was often spent on my sinful
pleasures, through which I was now and then brought into
trouble, so that once, to satisfy my hunger, I stole a piece
of coarse bread, the allowance of a soldier who was quar-
tered in the house where I lodged.
At midsummer, 1821, my father obtained, an appoint;
ment at Schoenebeck, near Magdeburg, and I embraced
the opportunity of entreating him to remove me to the
cathedral classical school of Magdeburg ; for I thought that
if I could but leave my companions in sin, and get out of
certain snares, and be placed under other tutors, I should
thon live a different life. My father consented, and I was
aiicf?ad to leave Halberstadt, and to stay at Heimersleben
till Michaelmas. Being thus quite my own master, I grew
still more idle, and lived as much as before in all sorts of
sin. When Michaelmas came, I persuaded my father to
leave me at Heimersleben till Easter, and to let me read the
classics with a clergyman living in the same place. I was
now living on the premises belonging to my father, under
little real control, and intrusted with a considerable sum of
money, which I had to collect for my father, from persons
who owed it to him. My habits soon led me to spend a
considerable part of this money, giving receipts for different
sums, yet leaving my father to suppose I had not received
them.
In November, I went on a pleasure excursion to Magde-
ourg, where I spent six days in much sin, and though my
absence from home had been found out by my father be-
fore I returned from thence, yet I took all the money I
could obtain, and went to Brunswick, after I had, through
a number of lies, obtained permission from my tutor. I
34 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHJLP. I.
spent a week at Brunswick, in an expensive hotel. At the
end of the week my money w^s expended. I then went,
without money, to another hotel, in a village near Bruns-
wick, where i spent another week in an expensive way of
living. At last, the owner of the hotel, suspecting that I
had no money, asked for payment, and I was obliged to
leave my best clothes as security. I then walked about six
miles, to Wolfenbuttel, went to an inn, and began again to
live as if I had plenty of money. On the second or third
morning I went quietly out of the yard, and then ran off;
but being suspected and observed, and therefore seen to go
off, I was immediately called after, and so had to return.
I was arrested, and being suspected to be a thief, was ex-
amined for about three hours, and then sent to jail. I
now found myself, at the age of sixteen, an inmate of the
same dwelling with thieves and murderers. I was locked
up in this place day and night, without permission to leave
my cell.
I was in prison from Dec. 18, 1821, till January 12, 1822,
when the keeper told me to go with him to the police
office. Here I found that the commissioner before whom I
had been tried, had acquainted my father with my conduct ;
and thus I was kept in prison till my father sent the money
which was needed for my travelling expenses, to pay my
debt in the inn, and for my maintenance in the prison. So
ungrateful was I now for certain little kindnesses shown to
me by a fellow-prisoner, that, although I had promised to
call on his sister, to deliver a message from him, I omitted
to do so ; and so little had I been benefited by this, my
chastisement, that, though I was going home to meet an
angry father, only two hours after I had left the town
\vhere I had been imprisoned, I chose an avowedly wicked
person as my travelling companion for a great part of my
My father, who arrived two days after I had reached
1822. BOYHOOD AND YOUTH. 35
Heimersleben, after having severely beaten me, took me
home to Schoenebeck, intending, at Easter, to send me to
a classical school at Halle, that I might be under strict dis-
cipline and the continual inspection of a tutor. Easter
came, and I easily persuaded him to let me stay at home
till Michaelmas. But after that period he would not con-
sent to my remaining any longer with him, and I left home,
pretending to go to Halle to be examined. But having a
hearty dislike to the strict discipline of which I had heard,
I went to Nordhausen, and had myself examined to be re-
ceived into that school. I then went home, but never told
my father a word of all this deception till the day before
my departure, which obliged me to invent a whole chain of
lies. He was then very angry; but at last, through my en-
treaties and persuasion, he gave way and allowed me to
go. This was in October, 1822.
I continued at Nordhausen two years and six months.
During this time I studied with considerable diligence the
Latin classics, French, history, my own language, etc.; but
did little in Hebrew, Greek, and the mathematics. I lived
in the house of the director, and got, through my conduct,
highly into his favor, so much so that I was held up by him
in the first class as an example to the rest. I used now to
rise regularly at four, winter and summer, and generally
studied all the day, with little exception, till ten at night.
But whilst I was thus outwardly gaining the esteem of
my fellow-creatures, I did not care in the least about God,
but lived secretly in much sin, in consequence of which I
was taken ill, and for thirteen weeks confined to my room.
During my illness I had no real sorrow of heart, yet, being
under certain natural impressions of religion, I read through
Klopstock's works without weariness. I cared nothing
about the word of God. I had about three hundred books
of my own, but no Bible. Now and then I felt that I
ought to become a different person, and I tried to amend
36 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. I.
my conduct, particularly when I went to the Lord's Sup-
per, as I used to do twice every year, with the other young
men. The day previous to attending that ordinance, I
used to refrain from certain things ; and on the day itself
I was serious, and also swore once or twice to God, with
the emblem of the broken body in my mouth, to become
better, thinking that for the oath's sake I should be induced
to reform. But after one or two days were over, all was
forgotten, and I was as bad as before.
At Easter, 1825, I became a member of the University
of Halle, and that with very honorable testimonials. I
thus obtained permission to preach in the Lutheran Estab-
lishment ; but I was as truly unhappy and as far from God
as ever. I had made strong resolutions now at last to
change my course of life, for two reasons : first, because,
without it, I thought no parish would choose me as their
pastor ; and secondly, that without a considerable knowl-
edge of divinity I should never get a good living. But the
moment I entered Halle, the university town, all my reso-
lutions came to nothing. Being now more than ever my
own master, I renewed my profligate life afresh, though now
a student of divinity. Yet in the midst of it all I had a
desire to renounce this wretched life, for I had no enjoy-
ment in it, and had sense enough left to see that the end, one
day or other, would be miserable. But I had no sorrow of
heart on account of offending God.
One day, when I was in a tavern with some of my wild
fellow-students, I saw among them one of my former school-
fellows, named Beta, whom I had known four years before
at Halberstadt, but whom at that time I had despised,
because he was so quiet and serious. It now appeared well
to me to choose him as my friend, thinking that, if I could
but have better companions, I should by that means im-
prove my own conduct. " Cursed le the man that trustcth
in mati, and maketh flesh his arm"
1825. BOYHOOD AND YOUTH. 37
This Beta was a backslider. When formerly he was so
quiet at school, I have reason to believe it was because the
Spirit of God was working on his heart ; but now, having
departed from the Lord, he tried to put off the ways of
God more and more, and to enjoy the world of which he
had known but little before. I sought his friendship, be-
cause I thought it would lead me to a steady life ; and Tie
gladly formed an acquaintance with me, as he told me af-
terwards, because he thought it would bring him into gay
society.
At the commencement of August, Beta and I, with two
other students, drove about the country for four days.
When we returned, instead of being truly sorry on account
of this sin, we thought of fresh pleasures ; and as my love
for travelling was stronger than ever, through what I had
seen on this last journey, I proposed to my friends to set
off for Switzerland. The obstacles in the way, the want
of money, and the want of the passports, were removed by
me. For, through forged letters from our parents, we pro-
cured passports, and through pledging all we could, partic-
ularly our books, we obtained as much money as we
thought would be enough. Forty-three days we were day
after day travelling, almost always on foot.
I had now obtained the desire of my heart. I had seen
Switzerland. But still I was far from being happy. I was
on this journey like Judas ; for, having the common purse,
I was a thief. I managed so that the journey cost me but
two thirds of what it cost my friends. I had, by many lies,
to satisfy my father concerning the travelling expenses.
During the three weeks I stayed at home, I determined to
live differently for the future. I was different for a few
days ; but when the vacation was over, and fresh students
came, and, with them, fresh money, all was soon forgotten.
4
CHAPTER II.
TflE PRODIGAL'S RETURN.
1*95—1826.
A TREASURE FOUND — DAWNING OF THE NEW LIFE— THE PEACE OF GOD-
"IAM COMB TO SETA MAN AT VARIANCE AGAINST HIS FATHER"-*
"LET HIM THAT HEARETH SAY, COME'" — THE FIRST SERMON— DELIGHT
IN THE LORD — A COMMON ERROR — THE FOUNTAIN NEGLECTED.
THE time was now come when God would have mercy
upon me. At a time when I was as careless about him as
ever, he sent his Spirit into my heart. I had no Bible, and
had not read in it for years. I went to church but seldom ;
but, from custom, I took the Lord's Supper twice a year.
I had never heard the gospel preached. I had never met
with a person who told me that he meant, by the help of
God, to live according to the Holy Scriptures. In short,
I had not the least idea that there were any persons really
different from myself, except in degree.
On Saturday afternoon, about the middle of November,
1825, I had taken a walk with my friend Beta. On our
return he said to me that he was in the habit of going on
Saturday evenings to the house of a Christian, where there
was a meeting. On further inquiry, he told me that they
read the Bible, sang, prayed, and read a printed sermon.
No sooner had I heard this than it was to me as if I had
found something after which I had been seeking all my life
long. We went together in the evening. As I did not
1825. THE PRODIGAL'S RETURN. 39
know the manners of believers, and the joy they have in
seeing poor sinners, even in any measure, caring about the
things of God, I made an apology for coming. The kind
answer of the dear brother I shall never forget. He said :
44 Come as often as you please ; house and heart are open
to you." We sat down and sang a hymn. Then brother
Kayser, now a missionary in Africa, fell on his knees and
asked a blessing on our meeting. This kneeling down
made a deep impression upon me ; for I had never either
seen any one on his knees, nor had I ever myself prayed on
my knees. He then read a* chapter and a printed sermon ;
for no regular meetings for expounding the Scriptures
were allowed in Prussia, except an ordained clergyman
was present. At the close we sang another hymn, and
then the master of the house prayed. Whilst he prayed,
my feeling was something like this : " I could not pray as
well, though I am much more learned than this illiterate
man." The whole made a deep impression on me. I was
happy ; though, if I had been asked why I was happy, I
could not have clearly explained it.
When we walked home, I said to Beta : " All we have
seen on our journey to Switzerland, and all our former
pleasures, are as nothing in comparison with this evening."
Whether I fell on my knees when I returned home, I do
not remember ; but this I know, that I lay peaceful and
happy in my bed. This shows that the Lord may begin
his work in different ways. For I have not the least doubt
that on that evening he began a work of grace in me,
though I obtained joy without any deep sorrow of heart,
and with scarcely any knowledge. But that evening was
the turning-point in my life. The next day, and Monday,
and once or twice besides, I went again to the house of
this brother, where I read the Scriptures with him and an-
other brother ; for it was too long for me to wait till Satur-
day came again.
40 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. II
Now my life became very different, though not so that
all sins were given up at once. My wicked companions
were given up ; the going to taverns was entirely discontin-
ued ; the habitual practice of telling falsehoods was no
longer indulged in; but still a few times after this I spoke
an untruth. I read the Scriptures, prayed often, loved the
brethren, went to church from right motives, and stood on
the side of Christ, though laughed at by my fellow-students.
In January, 1826, 1 began to read missionary papers, and
was greatly stirred up to become a missionary myself. J
prayed frequently concerning this matter, and thus mad<
more decided progress for a few weeks. About Easter
1826, I saw a devoted young brother, named Hermanr
Ball, a learned man, and of wealthy parents, who, con-
strained by the love of Christ, preferred laboring in Poland
among the Jews as a missionary to having a comfortable
living near his relations. His example made a deep impres-
sion on me. The Lord smiled on me, and I was, for the
first time in my life, able fully and unreservedly to give up
myself to him.
At this time I began truly to enjoy the peace of God
which passeth all understanding. In my joy I wrote to
my father and brother, entreating them to seek the Lord,
and telling them how happy I was ; thinking that, if the
way to happiness were but set before them, they would
gladly embrace it. To my great surprise an angry answer
was returned. About this period the Lord sent a believer^
Dr. Tholuck, as professor of divinity to Halle, in conse-
quence of which a few believing students came from other-
universities. Thus also, through becoming acquainted with
other brethren, the Lord led me on.
My former desire to give myself to missionary service
returned, and I went at last to my father to obtain his per-
mission, without which I could not be received into any of
the German missionary institutions. My father was greatly
t826. THE PRODIGAL'S RETURN. 41
displeased, and particularly reproached me, saying tLat he
had expended so much money on my education, in hope
that he might comfortably spend his last days with me in a
parsonage, and that he now saw all these prospects come to
nothing. He was angry, and told me he would no longer
consider me as his son. But the Lord gave me grace to
remain steadfast. He then entreated me, and wept before
me; yet even this by far harder trial the Lord enabled
me to bear. After I had left my father, though I wanted
more money than at any previous period of my life, as I
had to remain two years longer in the university, I deter-
mined never to take any more from him ; for it seemed to
me wrong, so far as I remember, to suffer myself to be sup-
ported by him, when he had no prospect that I should be-
come what he would wish me to be, namely, a clergyman
with a good living. This resolution I was enabled to keep.
Shortly after this had occurred, several American gen-
tlemen, three of whom were professors in American col-
leges, came to Halle for literary purposes, and, as they did
not understand German, I was recommended by Dr. Tho-
luck to teach them. These gentlemen, some of whom
were believers, paid so handsomely for the instruction
which I gave them, and for the lectures of certain profes-
sors which I wrote out for them, that I had enough and to
spare. Thus did the Lord richly make up to me the little
which I had relinquished for his sake. " O fear the Lord^
ye his saints / for there is no want to them that fear him"
Whitsuntide, and the two days following, I spent in the
house of a pious clergyman in the country; for all the min-
isters at Halle, a town of more than twenty thousand in-
habitants, were unenlightened men. God greatly refreshed
me through this visit. Dear Beta was with me. On our
return we related to two of our former friends, whose so-
ciety we had not quite given up, though we did not any
longer live with them in sin, how happy we had been on
4*
42 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. II
our visit. I then told them how I wished they were as
happy as ourselves. They answered, We do not feel that
we are sinners. After this I fell on my knees, and asked
God to show them that they were sinners. Having done
so, I went into my bedroom, where I continued to pray
for them. After a little while, I returned to my sitting-
room and found them both in tears, and both told me that
they now felt themselves to be sinners. From that time a
work of grace commenced in their hearts.
Though very weak and ignorant, yet I had now, by the
grace of God, some desire to benefit others, and he who so
faithfully had once served Satan, sought now to win souls
for Christ. I circulated every month about three hundred
missionary papers. I also distributed a considerable num-
ber of tracts, and often took my pockets full in my walks,
and distributed them, and spoke to poor people whom I
met. I also wrote letters to some of my former compan-
ions in sin. I visited, for thirteen weeks, a sick man, who,
when I first began to speak to him about the things of God,
was completely ignorant of his state as a sinner, trusting
for salvation in his upright and moral life. After some
weeks, however, the Lord allowed me to see a decided
change in him, and he afterwards repeatedly expressed his
gratitude that I had been sent to him by God to be the
means of opening his blind eyes.
Having heard that there was a schoolmaster living in a
village about six miles from Halle, who was in the habit
of holding a prayer meeting at four o'clock every morning,
with the miners, before they went into the pit, giving them
also an address, I thought he was a believer ; and as I knew
so very few brethren, I went to see him, in order, if it
might be, to strengthen his hands. About two years after-
wards, he told me that when I came to him first he knew
not the Lord, but that he had held these prayer meetings
merely out of kindness to a relative, whose office it was,
1826. THE PRODIGAL'S RETURN. 43
but who had gone on a journey ; and that those addresses
which he had read were not his own, but copied out ot a
book. He also told me that he was much impressed with
my kindness, and what he considered condescension on my
part in coming to see him, and this, together with my con-
versation, had been instrumental in leading him to care
about the things of God, and I knew him ever afterwards
as a true brother.
This schoolmaster asked me whether I would not preach
in his parish, as the aged clergyman would be very glad of
my assistance. . Up to this time I had never preached ; yet
I thought that by taking a sermon, or the greater part
of one, written by a spiritual man, and committing it to
memory, I might benefit the people. I set about putting
a printed sermon into a suitable form, and committing it to
memory. There is no joy in man's own doings and choos-
ings. I got through it, but had no enjoyment in the work.
It was on August 27, 1826, at eight in the morning, in a
chapel of ease. There was one service more, in the after-
noon, at which I needed not to have done anything ; but
having a desire to serve the Lord, though I often knew not
how to do it scripturally, and knowing that this aged and
unenlightened clergyman had had this living for forty-eight
years, and having therefore reason to believe that the gos-
pel scarcely ever had been preached in that place, I had it
In my heart to preach again in the afternoon. It came to
my mind to read the fifth chapter of Matthew, and to
make such remarks as I was able. I did so. Immediately
upon beginning to expound " Blessed are the poor in spirit,"
etc., I felt myself greatly assisted ; and whereas in the morn-
ing my sermon had not been simple enough for the people
to understand it, I now was listened to with the greatest
attention, and I think was also understood. My own peace
and joy were great. I felt this a blessed work.
On my way to Halle I thought, this is the way I should
44 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP, H
like al ways to preach. But then it came immediately to
my mind that such sort of preaching might do for illiterate
country people, but that it never would do before a well-
educated assembly in town. I thought the truth ought to
be preached at all hazards, but it ought to be given in a
different form, suited to the hearers. Thus I remained un-
settled in my mind as it regards the mode of preaching ;
and it is not surprising that I did not then see the truth
concerning this matter, for I did not understand the work
of the Spirit, and therefore saw not the powerlessness of
human eloquence. Further, I did not keep in mind that
if the most illiterate persons in the congregation can com-
prehend the discourse, the most educated will understand it
too ; but that the reverse does not hold true.
It was not till three years afterwards that I was led,
through grace, to see what I now consider the right mode
of preparation for the public preaching of the word. But
about this, if God permit, I will say more when I come to
that period of my life.
It was about this time that I formed the plan of ex-
changing the University of Halle for that of Berlin, on
account of there being a greater number of believing pro-
fessors and students in the latter place. But the whole
plan was formed without prayer, or at least without earnest
prayer. When, however, the morning came on which I
had to apply for the university testimonials, the Lord gra-
ciously stirred me up prayerfully to consider the matter ;
and finding that I had no sufficient reason for leaving
Halle, I gave up the plan, and have never had reason to
regret having done so.
The public means of grace by which I could be benefited
were very few. Though I went regularly to church when
I did not preach myself, yet I scarcely ever heard the
truth ; for there was no enlightened clergyman in the town.
And when it so happened that I could hear Dr. Tholuck,
1826. THE PRODIGAL'S RETURN. 43
or any other godly minister, the prospect of it beforehand,
and the looking back upon it afterwards, served to fill me
with joy. Now and then I walked ten or fifteen miles to
enjoy this privilege.
Another means of grace which I attended, besides the
Saturday-evening meetings in brother Wagner's house,
was a meeting every Lord's-day evening with the believ-
ing students, six or more in number, increased, before I left
Halle, to about twenty. In these meetings, one or two, or
more, of the brethren prayed, and we read the Scriptures,
sang hymns, and sometimes also one or another of the
brethren spoke a little in the way of exhortation, and we
read also such writings of godly men as were calculated
for edification. I was often greatly stirred up and re-
freshed in these meetings ; and twice, being in a backslid-
ing state, and therefore cold and miserable, I opened my
heart to the brethren, and was brought out of that state
through the means of their exhortations and prayers.
As to the other means of grace, I would say, I fell into
the snare into which so many young believers fall, the
reading of religious books in preference to the Scriptures.
I read tracts, missionary papers, sermons, and biographies
of godly persons. I never had been at any time of my
life in the habit of reading the Holy Scriptures. When
under fifteen years of age, I occasionally read a little of
them at school ; afterwards God's precious book was en-
tirely laid aside, so that I never read one single chapter of
it till it pleased God to begin a work of grace in my heart.
Now the scriptural way of reasoning would have been :
God himself has consented to be an author, and I am igno-
rant about that precious book, which his Holy Spirit has
caused to be written through the instrumentality of his
servants, and it contains that which I ought to know, the
knowledge of which will lead me to true happiness ; there-
fore I ought to read again and again this most precioua
46 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. EL
book of books, most earnestly, most prayerfully, and with
much meditation ; and in this practice I ought to continue
all the days of my life. But instead of acting thus, my
difficulty in understanding it, and the little enjoyment I
had in it, made me careless of reading it ; and thus, like
many believers, I practically preferred, for the first four
years of my divine life, the works of uninspired men to
the oracles of the living God. The consequence was, that
I remained a babe, both in knowledge and grace.
The last and most important means of grace, prayer,
was comparatively but little used by me. I prayed, and
prayed often, and in general, by the grace of God, with
sincerity ; but had I prayed as earnestly as I have of late
years, I should have made much more rapid progress.
CHAPTER III.
S EL F-D EDICATION.
1826 — 1829.
DESIRE FOB MISSIONARY LABOR — PROVIDENTIAL RELEASE FROM MILI-
TARY SERVICE— VISIT AT HOME — LED TO THE LAND OF HIS FUTURB
LABORS — PROGRESS IN RELIGIOUS KNOWLEDGE — DESIRE FOB IMMEDI-
ATE USEFULNESS.
IN August, 1827, 1 heard that the Continental Society
in England intended to send a minister to Bucharest, the
residence of many nominal German Christians, to help an
aged brother in the work of the Lord. After consideration
and prayer, I offered myself for this work to Professor
Tholuck, who was requested to look out for a suitable in-
dividual ; for with all my weakness I had a great desire to
live wholly for God. Most unexpectedly my father gave
his consent, though Bucharest was above a thousand miles
from my home, and as completely a missionary station as
any other. I now prepared with earnestness for the work
of the Lord. I set before me the sufferings which might
await me. And he who once so fully served Satan was
now willing, constrained by the love of Christ, rather to
suffer affliction for the sake of Jesus than to enjoy the
pleasures of sin for a season. I also prayed with a degree
of earnestness concerning my future work.
One day, at the end of October, the above-mentioned
48 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IIL
brother, Hermann Ball, missionary to the Jews, stated that
he feared, on account of his health, he should be obliged to
give up laboring among the Jews. When I heard this, I
felt a peculiar desire to fill up his -place. About this very
time, also, I became exceedingly fond of the Hebrew lan-
guage, which I had cared about very little up to that time,
and which I had merely studied now and then, from
a sense of duty. But now I studied it, for many weeks,
with the greatest eagerness and delight. Whilst I thus
from time to time felt a desire to fill up brother Ball's place,
and whilst I thus greatly delighted in the study of
Hebrew, I called, in the evening of November 17, on Dr.
Tholuck. In the course of conversation he asked me
whether I had ever had a desire to be a missionary to the
Jews, as I might be connected with the London Missionary
Society for promoting Christianity among them, for which
he was an agent. I was struck with the question, and told
him what had passed in my mind, but added that it was
not proper to think anything about that, as I was going to
Bucharest ; to which he agreed.
When I came home, however, these few words were like
fire within me. The next morning I felt all desire for
going to Bucharest gone, which appeared to me very wrong
and fleshly, and I therefore entreated the Lord to restore
to me the former desire for laboring on that missionary
station. He graciously did so almost immediately. My
earnestness in studying Hebrew, and my peculiar love for
it, however, continued.
About ten days after, Dr. Tholuck received a letter from
the Continental Society, stating, that on account of the
war between the Turks and Russians, it appeared well to
the committee for the time being to give up the thought
of sending a minister to Bucharest, as it was the seat of
war between the two armies. Dr. Tholuck then asked
me again what I now thought about being a missionary
1828. SELF-DEDICATION. 49
to the Jews. My reply was that I could not then give an
answer, but that I would let him know, after I had prayer-
fully considered the matter. After prayer and consider-
ation, and consulting with experienced brethren, in order
that they might probe my heart as to my motives, I came
to this conclusion, that I ought to offer myself to the com-
mittee, leaving it with the Lord to do with me afterwards
as it might seem good in his sight. Accordingly, Dr. Tho-
luck wrote, about the beginning of December, 1827, to the
committee in London.
It was not before March, 1828, that he received an
answer from London respecting me, in which the commit-
tee put a number of questions to me, on the satisfactory
answers to which my being received by them would de-
pend. After replying to this first communication, I waited
daily for an answer, and was so much the more desirous of
having it, as my course in the university was completed.
At last, on June 13, I received a letter from London,
stating that the committee had determined to take me as
a missionary student for six months on probation, provided
that I would come to London.
I had now had the matter before me about seven months,
having supposed not only that it would have been settled
in a few weeks, but also, that, if I were accepted, I should
be sent out immediately, as I had passed the university.
Instead of this, not only seven months passed over before
the decision came, but I was also expected to come to
London ; and not only so, but though I had from my in-
fancy been more or less studying, and now at last wished
actively to be engaged, it was required that I should again
become a student. For a few moments, therefore, I was
greatly disappointed and tried. But on calmly considering
the matter, it appeared to me but right that the committee
should know me personally, and that it was also well for
me to know them more intimately than merely by corre-
5
50 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. III.
epondence, as this afterwards would make our connection
much more comfortable. I determined, therefore, after I
had seen my father, and found no difficulty on his part, to
go to London.
There was, however, an obstacle in the way of my leav-.
ing the country. Every Prussian male subject is under the
necessity of being for three years a soldier, provided his
state of body allows it ; but those who have had a classical
education up to a certain degree, and especially those who
have passed the university, need to be only one year in
the army, but have to equip and maintain themselves
during that year. I could not obtain a passport out of the
country till I had either served my time or had been ex-
empted by the king himself. The latter I hoped would be
the case ; for it was a well-known fact that those who had
given themselves to missionary service had always been
exempted. Certain brethren of influence, living in the
capital, to whom I wrote on the subject, wrote to the king;
but he replied that the matter must be referred to the
ministry and to the law, and no exception was made in
my favor.
My chief concern now was how I might obtain a pass
port for England, through exemption from military duty
But the more certain brethren tried, though they knew
how to set about the matter, and were also persons of
rank, the greater difficulty there appeared to be in obtain
ing my object; so that in the middle of January, 1829, it
seemed as if I must immediately become a soldier. There
was now but one more way untried, and it was at last
resorted to. A believing major, who was on good terms
with one of the chief generals, proposed that I should
actually offer myself for entering the army, and that then
I should be examined as to my bodily qualifications, in the
hope that, as I was still in a very weak state of body, I
ahouki bo {one-* onfit for military service. In that case it
1829 SELF-DEDICATION. dl
would belong to the chief general finally to settle the mat-
ter ; who, being a godly man himself, on the major's recom-
mendation, would, no doubt, hasten the decision, on account
of my desire to be a missionary to the Jews.
Thus far the Lord had allowed things to go, to show me,
it appears, that all my friends could not procure me a pass-
port till his time was come. But now it was come. The
King of kings had intended that I should go to England,
because he would bless me there and make me a blessing,
though I was at that time, and am still, most unworthy of
it ; and, therefore, though the king of Prussia had not been
pleased to make an exemption in my favor, yet now all was
made plain, and that at a time when hope had almost been
given up, and when the last means had been resorted to. I
was examined, and was declared to be unfit for military ser-
vice. With a medical certificate to this effect, and a letter
of recommendation from the major, I went to this chief gen-
eral, who received me very kindly, and who himself wrote
instantaneously to a second military physician, likewise to
examine me at once. This was done, and it was by him
confirmed that I was unfit. Now, the chief general him-
self, as his adjutants happened to be absent, in order to
hasten the matter, wrote, with his own hands, the papers
which were needed, and I got a complete dismissal, and
that for life, from all military engagements.
On February 5 I arrived at my father's house ; it was
the place where I had lived as a boy, and the scene of many
of my sins, my father having now returned to it after his
retirement from office. There were but three persons in
the whole town with whom my soul had any fellowship.
One of them was earning his daily bread by thrashing corn.
As a boy I had in my heart laughed at him. Now I sought
him out, having been informed that he was a brother, to
acknowledge him as such, by having fellowship with him,
and attending a meeting in his house on the LordVday
52 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP IIL
evening. My soul was refreshed, and his also. Such a
spiritual feast as meeting with a brother was a rare thing
to him.
I left my father's house on February 10, and about
February 22 arrived at Rotterdam. My going to Eng-
land by the way of Rotterdam was not the usual way ;
but, consulting with a brother in Berlin, who had been
twice in England, I was told that this was the cheapest
route. My asking this brother, to be profited by his expe-
rience, would have been quite right, had I, besides this,
like Ezra, sought of the Lord the right way.1 But I
sought unto men only, and not at all unto the Lord, in
this matter. When I came to Rotterdam, I found that
no vessels went at that time from that port to London, on
account of the ice having just broken up in the river. Thus
I had to wait nearly a month at Rotterdam, and needed
much more time than I should have required to go by way
of Hamburg, and also much more money.
On March 19, 1829, I landed in London. Soon after
my arrival, I heard one of the brethren speak of Mr. Groves>
a dentist, who, for the Lord's sake, had given up his pro-
fession, which brought him in at least £1,500 2 a year, and who
intended to go as a missionary to Persia, with his wife and
children, simply trusting in the Lord for temporal supplies.
This made such an impression on me, and delighted me so,
that I not only marked it down in my journal, but also
wrote about it to my German friends.
I came to England weak in body, and, in consequence of
much study, as I suppose, I was taken ill on May 15, and
1 Then I proclaimed a fast, to seek of God a right way for u«. and for our
little ones, and for all our substance. — Ezra viii. 21.
2 To avoid the necessity of reducing the sums named to federal money,
it may be stated that a pound (£.) is equal to about $4.83, a sovereign to the
same, a shilling (s.) to about 23 cts. and a penny (d.) to 2 cts. For conven-
ience of computation, when exactness is not required, we may caii the pound
$5.00, and the shilling 25 cts. ~- ED.
1829. SELF-DEDICATION. 53
was soon, at least in my own estimation, apparently beyond
recovery. The weaker I became in body, the happier 1
was in spirit. Never in my whole life had I seen myself so
vile, so guilty, so altogether what I ought not to have been,
as at this time. It was as if every sin of which I had been
guilty was brought to my remembrance ; but at the same
time I could realize that all my sins were completely for-
given, — that I was washed and made clean, completely
clean, in the blood of Jesus: The result of this was great
peace. I longed exceedingly to depart and be with Christ.
When my medical attendant came to see me, my prayer
was something like this : " Lord, thou knowest that he does
not know what is for my real welfare, therefore do thou
direct him." When I took my medicine, my hearty prayer
each time was something like this : " Lord, thou knowest
that this medicine is in itself nothing, no more than as if 1
were to take a little water. Now please, O Lord, to let it
produce the effect which is for my real welfare, and for thy
glory. Let me either be taken soon to thyself, or let me
be soon restored ; let me be ill for a longer time, and then
taken to thyself, or let me be ill for a longer time, and then
restored. O Lord, do with me as seemeth thee best ! "
After I had been ill about a fortnight, my medical attend-
ant unexpectedly pronounced me better. As I recovered
but slowly, my friends entreated me to go into the country
for change of air. I thought that it might be the will of
God that I should do so, and I prayed therefore thus to
the Lord : " Lord, I will gladly submit myself to thy will,
and go, if thou wilt have me to go. And now let me know
thy will by the answer of my medical attendant. If, in
reply to my question, he says it would be very good for
me, I will go ; but if he says it is of no great importance,
then I will stay." When I asked him, he said that it was
the best thing I could do. I was then enabled willingly to
submit, and accordingly went to Teignmouth.
5*
54 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHIP. IH.
A few days after my arrival at Teignmouth, the chapel,
called Ebenezer, was reopened, and I attended the open-
ing. I was much impressed by one of those who preached
on the occasion. For though I did not like all he said, yet
I saw a gravity and solemnity in him different from the
rest. After he had preached, I had a great desire to know
more of him ; and, being invited by two brethren of Ex-
mouth, in whose house he was staying, to spend some time
with them, I had an opportunity of living ten days with
him under the same roof. It was at this time that God
began to show me that his word alone is our stand-
ard of judgment in spiritual things; that -it can be ex-
plained only by the Holy Spirit ; and that in our day, aa
well as in former times, he is the teacher of his people.
The office of the Holy Spirit I had not experimentally un-
derstood before that time. Indeed, of the office of each
of the blessed persons, in what is commonly called tho
Trinity, I had no experimental apprehension. I had not
before seen from the Scriptures that the Father chose us
before the foundation of the world ; that in him that won-
derful plan of our redemption originated, and that he also
appointed all the means by which it was to be brought
about. Further, that the Son, to save us, had fulfilled the
law, to satisfy its demands, and with it also the holiness of
God ; that he had borne the punishment due to our sins,
and had thus satisfied the justice of God. And, further,
that the Holy Spirit alone can teach us about our state
by nature, show us the need of a Saviour, enable us to
believe in Christ, explain to us the Scriptures, help us in
preaching, etc. It was my beginning to understand this latter
point in particular which had a great effect on me ; for the
Lord enabled me to put it to the test of experience, by laying
aside commentaries, and almost every other book, and
eimply reading the word of God and studying it. The
result of this was, that the first evening that I shut my-
1829. SELF-DEDICATION. 55
self into my room, to give myself to prayer and meditation
over the Scriptures, I learned more in a few hours than I had
done during a period of several months previously. But
the particular difference was, that I received real strength
for my soul in doing so. I now began to try by the test
of the Scriptures the things which I had learned and seen,
and found that only those principles which stood the test
were really of value.
My stay in Devonshire was most profitable to my soul.
My prayer had been, before I left London, that the Lord
would be pleased to bless my journey to the benefit of my
body and soul. In the beginning of September I returned s
to London, much better in body ; and as to my soul, the
change was so great that it was like a second conversion.
After my return to London, I sought to benefit my brethren
in the seminary, and the means which I used were these :
I proposed to them to meet together every morning from
six to eight for prayer and reading the Scriptures ; and
that then each of us should give out what he might con-
sider the Lord had shown him to be the meaning of the
portion read. One brother in particular was brought into
the same state as myself; and others, I trust, were more or
less benefited. Several times, when I went to my room
after family prayer in the evening, I found communion with
God so sweet that I continued in prayer till after twelve,
and then, being full of joy, went into the room of the
brother just referred to ; and finding him also in a similar
frame of heart, we continued praying until one or two ;
and even then I was a few times so full of joy that I could
scarcely sleep, and at six in the morning again called the
brethren together for prayer.
After I had been for about ten days in London, and had
been confined to the house on account of my studies, my
health began again to decline ; and I saw that it would not
be well, my poor body being only like a wreck or brand
56 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. Ill
brought out of the devil's service, to spend my little remain-
ing strength in study, but that I now ought to set about
actual engagement in the Lord's work. I wrote to the
committee of the Society, requesting them to send me out
at once ; and, that they might do so more comfortably, to
send me as a fellow-laborer with an experienced brother.
However, I received no answer.
After having waited about five or six weeks, in the
mean time seeking, in one way or other, to labor for the
Lord, it struck me that, considering myself called by the
Lord to preach the gospel, I ought to begin at once to
labor among the Jews in London, whether I had the title
of missionary or not. In consequence of this, I distributed
tracts among the Jews, with my name and residence writ-
ten on them, thus inviting them to conversation about the
things of God ; preached to them in those places where
they most numerously collect together ; read the Scriptures
regularly with about fifty Jewish boys; and became a
teacher in a Sunday school. In this work I had much en-
joyment, and the honor of being reproached and ill-treated
for the name of Jesus. But the Lord gave me grace,
never to be kept from the work by any danger, or the
prospect of any suffering.
Mr. Miiller was led, toward the close' of 1829, to
doubt the propriety of continuing under the patron-
age of the London Society. It seemed to him un-
scriptural for a servant of Christ to put himself
under the control and direction of any one but the
Lord. A correspondence with the Society, evincing
on his part, and on their part, entire kindness and
love, resulted in a dissolution of his relation to them.
1829. SELF-DEDICATION. 57
He was left free to preach the gospel wherever
Providence might open the way.
On December 30, I went to Exmouth, where I intended
to spend a fortnight in the house of some Christian friends.
I arrived at Exmouth on December 31, at six in the
evening, an hour before the commencement of a prayer-
meeting at Ebenezer Chapel. My heart was burning with
a desire to tell of the Lord's goodness to my soul. Being,
however, not called on, either to speak or pray, I was
silent. The next morning, I spoke on the difference
between being a Christian and a happy Christian, and
showed whence it generally comes that we rejoice so little
in the Lord. This, my first testimony, was blessed to many
believers, that God, as it appears, might show me that he
was with me. At the request of several believers, I spoke
again in the afternoon, and also proposed a meeting in the
chapel every morning at ten, to expound the epistle to the
Romans. The second day after my arrival, a brother said
to me, " I have been praying for this month past that the
Lord would do something for Lympstone, a large parish
where there is little spiritual light. There is a Wesleyan
chapel, and I doubt not you would be allowed to preach
there." Being ready to speak of Jesus wherever the Lord
might open a door, yet so that I could be faithful to the
truths which he had been pleased to teach me, I went, and
easily obtained liberty to preach twice on the next day,
being the Lord's day.
CHAPTER IV.
LEANING ON JESUS.
1830 — 1832.
A DOOB OPENED — TOKENS FOB GOOD — TRUST EXERCISED I» THE STUDY
AND MINISTRY OF THE WORD — THE SWORD OF THE SPIRIT — TRUSTING
IN GOD FOR DAILY BREAD — BLESSEDNESS OF WAITING UPON THE
LORD — "OWE NO MAN" — "ACCORDING TO YOUR FAITH BE IT UNTO
YOU" — THE GIF^T OF FAITH, AND THE GRACE OF FAITH.
AFTEK I had preached about three weeks at Exmouth
and its neighborhood, I went to Teignmouth, with the
intention of staying there ten days, to preach the word
among the brethren with whom I had become acquainted
during the previous summer, and to tell them of the Lord's
goo.dness to me. In the evening, Monday, I preached for
Brother Craik, at Shaldon, in the presence of three minis-
ters, none of whom liked the sermon ; yet it pleased God,
through it, to bring to the knowledge of his dear Son a
young woman. How differently does the Lord judge from
man ! Here was a particular opportunity for the Lord to
get glory to himself. A foreigner was the preacher, with
great natural obstacles in the way, for he was not able to
speak English with fluency ; but he had a desire to serve
God, and was by this time also brought into such a state
of heart as to desire that God alone should have the glory,
if any good were done through his instrumentality.
18301 LEANING ON JESUS. 59
On Tuesday evening, I preached at Ebe.nezer Chapel,
Teignmouth, the same chapel at the opening of which I
became acquainted with the brother whom the Lord had
afterwards used as an instrument of benefiting me so
much.
During the week ensuing, Mr. M. preached almost
daily at the same place, a blessing attending his labors.
By this time, the request that I might stay at Teigu
mouth, and be the minister of the above chapel, had be' a
repeatedly expressed by an increasing number of JLQ
brethren ; but others were decidedly against my remai Jng
there. This opposition was instrumental in settling it in
my mind that I should stay for a while, at least until I was
formally rejected.
I preached again three times on the Lord's day, none
saying we wish you not to preach, though many of the
hearers did not hear with enjoyment. Some of them left,
and never returned ; some left, but returned after a while.
Others came to the chapel who had not been in the habit
of attending there previous to my coming. There was a
great stir, a spirit of inquiry, and a searching of the Scrip-
tures, whether these things were so. And, what is more
than all, God set his seal upon the work, in converting
sinners. Twelve weeks I stood in this same position,
whilst the Lord, graciously supplied my temporal wants,
through two brethren, unasked for. After this time, the
whole little church, eighteen in number, unanimously gave
me an invitation to become their pastor. They offered to
supply my temporal wants by giving me fifty-five pounds a
year, which sum was afterwards somewhat increased, on
account of the increase of the church.
That which I now considered the best mode of prepara-
tion for the public ministry of the word, no longer adopted
60 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV.
from necessity, on account of want of time, but from deep
conviction, and from the experience of God's blessing upon
it, both as it regards my own enjoyment, the benefit of the
saints, and the conversion of sinners, is as follows : First, I
do not presume to know myself what is best for the hear-
ers, and I therefore ask the Lord, in the first place, that he
would graciously be pleased to teach me on what subject
I shall speak, or what portion of his word I shall expound.
Now, sometimes it happens that, previous to my asking
him, a subject or passage has been in my mind, on which
it has appeared well for me to speak. In that case, I ask
the Lord whether I should speak on this subject or
passage. If, after prayer, I feel persuaded that I should, I
fix upon it, yet so that I would desire to leave myself open
to the Lord to change it if he please. Frequently, how-
ever, it occurs that I have no text or subject in my mind,
before I give myself to prayer for the sake of ascertaining
the Lord's will concerning it. In this case, I wait some
time on my knees for an answer, trying to listen to the
voice of the Spirit to direct me. If, then, a passage or
subject, whilst I am on my knees, or after I have finished
praying for a text, is brought to my mind, I again ask the
Lord, and that sometimes repeatedly, especially if, humanly
speaking, the subject or text should be a peculiar one,
whether it be his will that I should speak on such a sub-
ject or passage. If, after prayer, my mind is peaceful
about it, I take this to be the text, but. still desire to leave
myself open to the Lord for direction, should he please to
alter it, or should I have been mistaken. Frequently, also,
in the third place, it happens that I not only have no text
nor subject on my mind previous to my praying for
guidance in this matter, but also I do not obtain one after
once, or twice, or more times praying about it. I used
formerly at times to be much perplexed when this was the
case, but, for more than twenty years, it has pleased the
1830. LEANING ON JESUS. 61
Lord, in general at least, to keep me in peace about it.
What I do is, to go on with my regular reading of the
Scriptures, where I left off the last time, praying (whilst I
read) for a text, now and then also laying aside my Bible
for prayer, till I get one. Thus it has happened that I
have had to read five, ten, yea, twenty chapters, before it
has pleased the Lord to give me a text ; yea, many times I
have even had to go to the place of meeting without one,
and obtained it, perhaps, only a few minutes before I was
going to speak ; but I have never lacked the Lord's assist-
ance at the time of preaching, provided I had earnestly
sought it in private. The preacher cannot know the par-
ticular state of the various individuals who compose the
congregation, nor what they require, but the Lord knows
it ; and if the preacher renounces his own wisdom, he will
be assisted by the Lord ; but if he will choose in his own
wisdom, then let him not be surprised if he should see
little benefit result from his labors.
Before I leave this part of the subject, I would just
observe one temptation concerning the choice of a text.
We may see a subject to be so very full that it may strike
us it would do for some other occasion. For instance,
sometimes a text brought to one's mind for a week-evening
meeting may appear more suitable for the Lord's day,
because then there would be a greater number of hearers
present. Now, in the first place, we do not know whether
the Lord ever will allow us to preach on another Lord's
day ; and, in the second place, we know not whether that
very subject may not be especially suitable for some or
many individuals present just that week-evening. Thus
I was once tempted, after I had been a short time at
Teignmouth, to reserve a subject which had been just
opened to me for the next Lord's day. But being able,
by the grace of God, to overcome the temptation by the
above reasons, and preaching about it at once, it pleased
6
62 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV.
the Lord to bless it to the conversion of a sinner, and that,
too, an individual who meant to come but that once more
to the chapel, and to whose case the subject was most
remarkably suited.
2. Now, when the text has been obtained in the above
way, whether it be one, or two, or more verses, or a whole
chapter or more, I ask the Lord that he would graciously
be pleased to teach me by his Holy Spirit whilst meditat-
ing over it. Within the last twenty-five years, I have
found it the most profitable plan to meditate with my pen
in my hand, writing down the outlines as the word is
opened to me. This I do, not for the sake of committing
them to memory, nor as if I meant to say nothing else,
but for the sake of clearness, as being a help to see how
far I understand the passage. I also find it useful after-
wards to refer to what I have thus written. I very
•seldom use any other help besides the little I understand
of the original of the Scriptures, and some good transla-
tions in other languages. My chief help is prayer. I
have NEVER in my life begun to study one single part of
divine truth without gaining some light about it when I
have been able really to give myself to prayer and medi-
tation over it. But that I have often found a difficult
matter, partly on account of the weakness of the flesh, and
partly, also, on account of bodily infirmities and multiplicity
of engagements. This I most firmly believe, that no one
ought to expect to see much good resulting from his labors
in word and doctrine, if he is not much given to prayer
and meditation.
3. Having prayed and meditated on the subject or text,
I desire to leave myself entirely in the hands of the Lord.
I ask him to bring to my mind what I have seen in my
closet concerning the subject I am going to speak on,
which he generally most kindly does, and often teaches
me much additionally whilst I am preaching.
1830. LEANING ON JESUS. 63
In connection with the above, I must, however, state
that it appears to me there is a preparation for the public
ministry of the word which is even more excellent than
the one spoken of. It is this ; to live in such constant and
real communion with the Lord, and to be so habitually
and frequently in meditation over the truth, that without
the above effort, so to speak, we have obtained food for
others, and know the mind of the Lord as to the subject
or the portion of the word on which we should speak.
That which I have found most beneficial in my expe-
rience for the last twenty-six years in the public ministry
of the word, is expounding the Scriptures, and especially
the going now and then through a whole gospel or epistle.
This may be done in a twofold way, either by entering
•minutely into the bearing of every point occurring in the
portion, or by giving the general outlines, and thus leading
the hearers to see the meaning and connection of the
whole. The benefits which I have seen resulting from
expounding the Scriptures, are these : 1. The hearers are
thus, with God's blessing, led to the Scriptures. They find,
as it were, a practical use of them in the public meetings.
This induces them to bring their Bibles, and I have ob-
served that those who at first did not bring them, have
afterwards been induced to do so ; so that, in a short time,
few (of the believers at least) were in the habit of coming
without them. This is no small matter; for everything
which in our day will lead believers to value the Scrip-
tures is of importance. 2. The expounding of the Scrip-
tures is in general more beneficial to the hearers than if,
on a single verse, or half a verse, or two or three words of
a verse, some remarks are made, so that the portion of
Scripture is scarcely anything but a motto for the sub-
ject ; for few have grace to meditate much over the word,
and thus exposition may not merely be the means of
opening to them the Scriptures, but may also create in
64 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. TV-
them a desire to meditate for themselves. 3. The ex
pounding of the Scriptures leaves to the hearers a con-
necting link, so that the reading over again the portion of
the word which has been expounded brings to their
remembrance what has been said, and thus, with God's
blessing, leaves a more lasting impression on their minds.
This is particularly of importance as it regards the illiter-
ate, who sometimes have neither much strength of memory
nor capacity of comprehension. 4. The expounding of
large portions of the word as the whole of a gospel or an
epistle, besides leading the hearer to see the connection of
the whole, has also this particular benefit for the teacher,
that it leads him, with God's blessing, to the consideration
of portions of the word which otherwise he might not
have considered, and keeps him from speaking too much
on favorite subjects, and leaning too much to particular
parts of truth, which tendency must surely sooner or later
injure both himself and his hearers. Expounding the
word of God brings little honor to the preacher from the
unenlightened or careless hearer, but it tends much to the
benefit of the hearers in general.
Simplicity in expression, whilst the truth is set forth, is,
in connection with what has been said, of the utmost im-
portance. It should be the aim of the teacher to speak so
that children, servants, and people who cannot read may
be able to understand him, so far as the natural mind can
comprehend the things of God. It ought also to be
remembered that there is, perhaps, not a single congre-
gation in which there are not persons of the above classes
present, and that if they can understand, the well-educated
or literary persons will understand likewise; but the
reverse does not hold good. It ought further to be re-
membered that the expounder of the truth of God speaks
for God, for eternity, and that it is not in the least likely
that lie will benefit the hearers, except he use plainness of
1830. LEANING ON JESUS. 65
speech, which nevertheless needs not to be vulgar or rude.
It should also be considered that if the preacher strive to
speak according to the rules of this world, he may please
many, particularly those who have a literary taste ; but, in
the same proportion, he is less likely to become an instru-
ment in the hands of God for the conversion of sinners, or
for the building-up of the saints. For neither eloquence
nor depth of thought makes the truly great preacher, but
such a life of prayer and meditation and spirituality as
may render him a vessel meet for the Master's use, and fit
to be employed both in the conversion of sinners and in
the edification of the saints.
•*^
Becoming convinced, after a prayerful examination
of the Scriptures, that baptism should be administered
only by immersion, Mr. Miiller was thus baptized in
the spring of 1830.
It was so usual for me to preach with particular assist-
ance, especially during the first months of this year, that
once, when it was otherwise, it was much noticed by
myself and others. The circumstance was this. One day,
before preaching at Teignmouth, I had more time than
usual, and therefore prayed and meditated about six hours
in preparation for the evening meeting, and I thought I
saw many precious truths in the passage on which I had
meditated. It was the first part of the first chapter of the
epistle to the Ephesians. After I had spoken a little time,
I felt that I spoke in my own strength, and I, being a
foreigner, felt particularly the want of words, which had
not been the case before. I told the brethren that I felt
I was left to myself, and asked their prayers. But after
having continued a little longer, and feeling the same as
before, I closed, and proposed that we should have a
6*
66 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV.
meeting for prayer, that the Lord still might be pleased to
help me. We did so, and I was particularly assisted the
next time.
On October 7, 1880, I was united by marriage to Miss
Mary Groves, sister of the brother whose name has already
been mentioned. This step was taken after prayer and
deliberation, from a full conviction that it was better for
me to be married ; and I have never regretted since either
the step itself or the choice, but desire to be truly grateful
to God for having given me such a wife.
About this time, I began to have conscientious objec-
tions against any longer receiving a stated salary. My
reasons against it were these : —
1. The salary was made up by pew-rents ; but pew-rents
are, according to James ii. 1-6, against the mind of the
Lord, as, in general, the poor brother cannot have so good
a seat as the rich. 2. A brother may gladly do something
towards my support if left to his own time ; but, when the
quarter is up, he has perhaps other expenses, and I do not
know whether he pays his money grudgingly, and of
necessity, or cheerfully ; but God loveth a cheerful giver.
Nay, I knew it to be a fact that sometimes it had not been
convenient to individuals to pay the money when it had
been asked for by the brethren who collected it. 3
Though the Lord had been pleased to give me grace to be
faithful, so that I had been enabled not to keep back the
truth when he had shown it to me ; still, I felt that the
pew-rents were a snare to the servant of Christ. It was a
temptation to me, at least for a few minutes, at the time
when the Lord had stirred me up to pray and search the
word respecting the ordinance of baptism, because thirty
pounds of my salary was at stake if I should be baptized.
For these reasons, I stated to the brethren, at the end
of October, 1830, that I should for the future give up hav-
ing any regular salary. After I had given my reasons for
1830. LEANING ON JEStJS. 67
doing so, I read Philippians iv., and told the saints that
if they still had a desire to do something towards my sup- ^
port, by voluntary -gifts, I had no objection to receive -
them, though ever so small, either in money or provisions.
A few days after, it appeared to me that there was a better
way still ; for, if I received personally every single gift
offered in money, both my own time and that of the
donors would be much taken up ; and in this way, also, the
poor might, through temptation, be kept from offering
their pence, a privilege of which they ought not to be
deprived ; and some also might in this way give more
than if it were not known who was the giver, so that it
would still be doubtful whether the gift were given grudg-
ingly or cheerfully. For these reasons especially, there
was a box put up in the chapel, over which was written
that whoever had a desire to do something towards my
support might put his offering into the box.
At the same time, it appeared to me right that hence- \
forth I should ask no man, not even my beloved brethren
and sisters, to help me, as I had done a few times, accord-
ing to their own request, as my expenses, on account of
travelling much in the Lord's service, were too great to
be met by my usual income. For, unconsciously, I had
thus again been led, in some measure, to trust in an arm
of flesh, going to man instead of going to the Lord at
once. To come to this conclusion before God required
more grace than to give up my salary.
About the same time, also, my wife and I had grace
given to us to take the Lord's commandment, "Sell that ye
have, and give alms," Luke xii. 33, literally, and to carry it
out. Our staff and support in this matter were Matthew
vi. 19-34, John xiv. 13, 14. We leaned on the arm of the
Lord Jesus. It is now twenty-five years since we set out
in this way, and \ce do not in the least regret the step we
then took, As I have written down how the Lord has
68 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV.
been pieased to deal with us since, I shall be able to relate
some facts concerning this matter, as far as they may tend
to edification.
N"ov. 18, 1830. Our money was reduced to about eight
shillings. When I was praying with my wife in the morn-
ing, the Lord brought to my mind the state of our purse,
and I was led to ask him for some money. About four
hours after, a sister said to me, "Do you want any
money?" "I told the brethren," said I, "dear sister, when
I gave up my salary, that I would for the future tell the
Lord only about my wants." She replied, " But he has
told me to give you some money. About a fortnight ago}
I asked him what I should do for him, and he told me to
give you some money ; and last Saturday it came again
powerfully to my mind, and has not left me since, and 1
felt it so forcibly last night that I could not help speaking
of it to brother P." My heart rejoiced, seeing the Lord's,
faithfulness, but I thought it better not to tell her about
our circumstances, lest she should be influenced to give
accordingly ; and I also was assured that, if it were of the
Lord, she could not but give. I therefore turned the
conversation to other subjects, but when I left she gave
me two guineas. We were full of joy on account of the
goodness of the Lord. I would call upon the reader to
admire the gentleness of the Lord, that he did not try
our faith much at the commencement, but allowed us to
Bee his willingness to help us, before he was pleased to try
it more fully.
The next Wednesday I went to Exmouth, our money
having then again been reduced to about nine shillings.
I asked the Lord on Thursday, when at Exmouth, to be
pleased to give me some money. On Friday morning,
about eight o'clock, whilst in prayer, I was particularly
led to ask again for money ; and before I rose from my
knees I had the fullest assurance that we should have the
1830. LEANING ON JESUS. 69
answer that very day. About nine o'clock I left the
brother with whom I was staying, and he gave me half
a sovereign, saying, " Take this for the expenses con-
nected with your coming to us." I did not expect to
have my expenses paid, but I saw the Lord's fatherly
hand in sending me this money within one hour after my
asking him for some. But even then I was so fully assured
that the Lord would send more that very day, or had
done so already, that, when I came home about twelve
o'clock, I asked my wife whether she had received any
letters. She told me she had received one the day
before from a brother in Exeter, with three sovereigns.
Thus even my prayer on the preceding day had been an-
swered. The next day one of the brethren came and
brought me four pounds, which was due to me of my
former salary, but which I could never have expected,
as I did not even know that this sum was due to me.
Thus I received, within thirty hours, in answer to prayer,
seven 'pounds ten shillings.
About Christmas, when our money was reduced to a few
shillings, I asked the Lord for more ; when, a few hours
after, there was given to us a sovereign by a brother from
Axminster. This brother had heard much against me,
and was at last determined to hear for himself, and thus
came to Teignmouth, a distance of forty miles ; and hav-
ing heard about our manner of living, gave us this money.
With this closes the year 1830. Throughout it the
Lord richly supplied all my temporal wants, though at the
commencement of it I had no certain human prospect for
one single shilling: so that, even as t regards temporal
things, I had not been in the smallest degree a loser in
acting according to the dictates of my conscience ; and us
it regards spiritual things, the Lord had dealt bountifully
with me, and had condescended to use me as an i
ment in doing his work.
70 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV.
On the 6th, 7th, and 8th of Jan. 1831, 1 had repeatedly
askb^ the Lord for money, but received none. On the
evening of January 8, I left my room for a few minutes,
and was then tempted to distrust the Lord, though he had
been so gracious to us in that he not only, up to that day,
had supplied all our wants, but had given us also those
answers of prayer which have been in part just mentioned.
I was so sinful, for about five minutes, as to think it would
be of no use to trust in the Lord in this way. I also
began to say to myself, that I had perhaps gone too far in
living in this way. But, thanks to the Lord ! this trial
lasted but a few minutes. He enabled me again to trust
in him, and Satan was immediately confounded ; for when
I returned to my room, out of which I had not been
absent ten minutes, the Lord had sent deliverance. A
sister in the Lord had brought us two pounds four shil-
lings: so the Lord triumphed, and our faith was
strengthened.
Jan. 10. To-day, when we had again but a few shil-
lings, five pounds were given to us, which had been taken
out of the box. I had, once for all, told the brethren, who
had the care of these temporal things, to have the kind-
ness to let me have the money every week; but as these
beloved brethren either forgot to take it out weekly, or
were ashamed to bring it in such small sums, it was gen-
erally taken out every three, four, or five weeks. As I had
stated to them, however, from the commencement, that I
desired to look neither to man nor the box, but to the
living God, I thought it not right on my part to remind
them of my request to have the money weekly, lest it
should hinder the testimony which I wished to give, of
trusting in the living God alone. It was on this account
that on January 28, when we had again but little money,
though I had seen the brethren, on January 24, open
the box and take out the money, I would not ask the
1831. LEANING ON JESUS. 71
brother, in whose hands it was, to let me have it ; but
standing in need of it, as our coals were almost gone, I
asked the Lord to incline his heart to bring it ; and but a
little time afterwards it was given to us, even one pound
eight shillings and sixpence.
I would here mention, that, since the time I began
living in this way, I have been kept from speaking, either
directly or indirectly, about my wants, at the time I was
in need. The only exception is, that in a few instances,
twenty years or more since, I have, at such times, spoken
to very poor brethren, in the way of encouraging them to
trust in the Lord, telling them that I had to do the same,
being myself in similar straits ; or, in a few instances,
where it was needful to speak about my own want, lest I
should appear unfeeling, in that I did not help at all, in
cases of distress, or not as much as might have been
expected.
On February 14 we had again very little money, and,
whilst praying, I was led to ask the Lord graciously to
supply our wants ; and the instant that I got up from my
knees a brother gave me one pound, which had been taken
out of the box.
On March 7, I was again tempted to disbelieve the
faithfulness of the Lord, and though I was not miserable,
still, I was not so fully resting upon the Lord that I could
triumph with joy. It was but one hour after, when the
Lord gave me another proof of his faithful love. A Chris-
tian lady brought five sovereigns for us, with these words
written in the paper : " I was an hungered, and ye gave
me meat ; I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink," etc.
April 16. This morning I found that our money was
reduced to three shillings; and I said to myself, I must
now go and ask the Lord earnestly for fresh supplies. But
before I had prayed, there was sent from Exeter two
pounds, as a proof that the Lord hears before we call.
72 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IV
I would observe here, by the way, that if any of the
children of God should think that such a mode of living
leads away from the Lord, and from caring about spiritual
things, and has the effect of causing the mind to be taken
up with the question, What shall I eat ? — What shall I
drink ? — and Wherewithal shall I be clothed ? — I would
request him prayerfully to consider the following remarks :
1. I have had experience of both ways, and know that
my present mode of living, as to temporal things, is con-
nected with less care. 2. Confidence in the Lord, to whom
alone I look for the supply of my temporal wants, keeps
me, when a case of distress comes before me, or when the
Lord's work calls for my pecuniary aid, from anxious
reckoning like this : Will my salary last out ? Shall I have
enough myself the next month ? etc. In this my freedom,
I am, by the grace of God, generally, at least, able to say
to myself something like this : My Lord is not limited ;
he can again supply ; he knows that this present case has
been sent to me : and thus, this way of living, so far from
leading to anxiety, is rather the means of keeping from it.
And truly it was once said to me by an individual, — You
can do such and such things, and need not to lay by, for
the church in the whole of Devonshire cares about youi
wants. My reply was : The Lord can use not merely any
of the saints throughout Devonshire, but those throughout
the world, as instruments to supply my temporal wants.
3. This way of 'living has often been the means of reviving
the work of grace in my heart, when I have been getting
cold ; and it also has been the means of bringing me back
again to the Lord, after I have been backsliding. For it
will not do, — it is not possible to live in sin, and at the
Barne time, by communion with God, to draw down from
heaven everything one needs for the life that now is. 4.
Frequently, too, a fresh answer to prayer, obtained in this
1S31. LEANING ON JESUS. 73
way, has been the means of quickening my soul, and filling
me with much joy.
May 12. A sister has been staying for some time at
Teignmouth on account of her health ; and when she was
about to return home to-day, we saw it the Lord's will to
invite her to stay with us for some time, as we knew that
she would stay longer if her means allowed it. We were
persuaded that, as we saw it to be the Lord's will to invite
her, he himself would pay the expenses connected with
her stay. About the time when she came to our house, a
parcel with money was sent from Chumleigh. A few
weeks before, I had preached at Chumleigh and in the
neighborhood. The brethren, knowing about my manner
of living, after my departure collected some money for me,
and thus, in small offerings (one hundred and seven alto-
gether, as I have been told), two pounds and one penny
halfpenny were given. Thus the Lord paid for the expenses
connected with our sister's staying with us.
June 12. Lord's day. On Thursday last I went with
brother Craik to Torquay, to preach there. I had only
about three shillings with me, and left my wife with about
six shillings at home. I asked the Lord repeatedly for
money ; but when I came home my wife had only about
three shillings left, having received nothing. We waited
still upon the Lord. Yesterday passed away, and no money
came. We had ninepence left. This morning we were
Btill waiting upon the Lord, and looking for deliverance.
We had only a little butter left for breakfast, sufficient for
brother E. and a relative living with us, to whom we did
not mention our circumstances, that they might not be
made uncomfortable. After the morning meeting, brother
Y. most unexpectedly opened the box, and, in giving me
quite as unexpectedly the money at such a time, he told me
that he and his wife could not sleep last night, on account
of thinking that we might want money. The most striking
74 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHAP. IV.
point is, that after I had repeatedly asked the Lord, but
received nothing, I then prayed yesterday that the Lord
would be pleased to impress it on brother Y. that we wanted
money, so that he might open the box. There was in it
one pound eight shillings and tenpence halfpenny.
November 16. This morning I proposed united prayer
respecting our temporal wants. Just as we were about
to pray, a parcel came from Exmouth. In prayer we
asked the Lord for meat for dinner, having no money to
buy any. After prayer, on opening the parcel, we found,
among other things, a ham, sent by a brother at Exmouth,
which served us for dinner.
November 19. We had not enough to pay our weekly
rent; but the Lord graciously sent us again to-day fourteen
shillings and sixpence. I would just observe, that we
never contract debts, which we believe to be un scriptural
(according to Romans xiii. 8) ; and therefore we have no
bills with our tailor, shoemaker, grocer, buteher, baker, etc. ;
but all we buy we pay for in ready money. The Lord
helping us, we would rather suffer privation than contract
debts. Thus we always know how much we have, and
how much we have a right to give away. I am well aware
that many trials come upon the children of God, on account
of not acting according to Bom. xiii. 8.
November 27. Lord's day. Our money had been
reduced to two pence halfpenny ; our bread was hardly
enough for this day. I had several times brought our need
before the Lord. After dinner, when I returned thanks, I
asked him to give us our daily bread, meaning literally that
he would send us bread for the evening. Whilst I was
praying, there was a knock at the door of the room. After
1 had concluded, a poor sister came in, and brought us some
of her dinner, and from another poor sister five shillings.
In the afternoon she also brought us a large loaf. Thus
the Lord not only literally gave us bread but also money.
1832. LEANING ON JESUS. 75
After we had, on December 31, 1831, looked over the
Lord's gracious dealings with us during the past year, in
providing for all our temporal wants, we had about ten
shillings left. A little while after, the providence of God
called for that, so that not a single farthing remained.
Thus we closed the old year, in which the Lord had been
BO gracious in giving to UP, without our asking any one, —
1. Through the instrumentality of the box, thirty-one
pounds fourteen shillings. 2. From brethren of the church
at Teignmouth, in presents of money, six pounds eighteen
shillings and sixpence. 3. From brethren living at Teign-
mouth and elsewhere, not connected with the church at
Teignmouth, ninety-three pounds six shillings and two-
pence. Altogether, one hundred and thirty-one pounds
eighteen shillings and eightpence. There had been like-
wise many articles of provision, and some articles of
clothing given to us, worth at least twenty pounds. I am
BO particular in mentioning these things, to show that we
are never losers from acting according to the mind of the
Lord. For had I had my regular salary, humanly speak-
ing, I should not have had nearly as much ; but whether
this would have been the case or not, this is plain, that I
have not served a hard master, and that is what I delight
to show.
January 7, 1832. We had been again repeatedly asking
the Lord to-day and yesterday to supply our temporal
wants, having no means to pay our weekly rent, and this
evening, as late as eleven o'clock, a brother gave us nine-
teen shillings and sixpence, — a proof that the Lord is not
limited to time.
January 14. This morning we had nothing but dry
bread with our tea ; only the second time since we have
been living by simple faith upon Jesus for temporal sup-
plies. We have more than forty pounds of ready money
76 THE LIFE OF TKUST. CHAP. IV.
in the house for two bills,1 which will not be payable for
several weeks ; but we do not consider this money to be
our own, and would rather suffer great privation, God help-
ing us, than take of it. We were looking to our Father,
and he has not suffered us to be disappointed. For when
DOW we had but threepence left, and only a small piece
of bread, we received two shillings and five shillings.
February 18. This afternoon I broke a bloodvessel in
my stomach, and lost a considerable quantity of blood. I
was very happy immediately afterwards. February 19.
This morning, Lord's day, two brethren called on me, to
ask me what arrangement there should be made to-day, as
it regarded the four villages, where some of the brethren
were in the habit of preaching, as, on account of my not
being able to preach, one of the brethren would need to
stay at home to take my place. I asked them, kindly, to
come again in about an hour, when I would give them an
answer. After they were gone, the Lord gave me faith to
rise. I dressed myself, and determined to go to the chapel.
I was enabled to do so, though so weak when I went, that
walking the short distance to the chapel was an exertion
to me. I was enabled to preach this morning with as loud
and strong a voice as usual, and for the usual length of
time. After the morning meeting, a medical friend called
on me, and entreated me not to preach again in the after-
noon, as it might greatly injure me. I told him that I
should indeed consider it great presumption to do so had
the Lord not given me faith. I preached again in the after-
noon, and this medical friend called again, and said the
same concerning the evening meeting. Nevertheless,
having faith, I preached again in the evening. After each
1 One bill I had to meet for a brother, the other was for money which, in
the form of a bill, I had sent to the Continent; but in both cases the money
Vas ill my hands before the bills were given.
1832. LEANING ON JESUS. 77
meeting I becf.me stronger, which was a plain proof that
the hand of God was m the matter.
February 20. Tfce Lord enabled me to rise early in the
morning, and to go to our usual prayer meeting, where I
read, spoke, and prayed. Afterwards I wrote four letters,
expounded the Scriptures at home, and attended the meet-
ing again in the evening. February 21. I attended the
two meetings as usual, preached in the evening, and did
my other work besides. February 22. To-day I attended
tlio meeting in the morning, walked afterwards six miles
with two brethren, and rode to Plymouth. February 23.
I am now as well as I was before I broke the bloodvessel.
In relating the particulars of this circumstance, I would
earnestly warn every one who may read this not to imitate
me in such a thing if he has no faith ; but if he has, it will,
as good coin, most assuredly be honored by God. I could
not say that if such a thing should happen again I would
act in the same way ; for when I have been not nearly so
weak as when I had broken the bloodvessel, having no
faith, I did not preach ; yet, if it were to please the Lord
to give me faith, I might be able to do the same, though
even still weaker than at the time just spoken of.
About this time I repeatedly prayed with sick believers
till they were restored. Unconditionally I asked the Lord
for the blessing of bodily health (a thing which I could not
do now), and almost always had the petition granted. In
some instances, however, the prayer was not answered.
In the same way, whilst in London, November, 1829, in
answer to my prayers, I was immediately restored from a
bodily infirmity under which I had been laboring for a
long time, and which has never returned since. The way
in which I now account for these facts is as follows. It
pleased the Lord, I think, to give me in such cases some-
thing like the gift (not grace) of faith, so that uncondi-
tionally I could ask and look for an answer. The difference
7*
78 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHJLP. IV,
between the gift and the grace of faith seems to me this.
According to the gift of faith, I am able to do a thing, or
believe that a thing will come to pass, the not doing of
which, or the not believing of which, would not be sin ;
according to the grace of faith, I am able to do a thing, or
believe that a thing will come to pass, respecting which I
have the word of God as the ground to rest upon, and,
therefore, the not doing it, or the not believing it, would
be sin. For instance, the gift of faith would be needed
to believe that a sick person should be restored aga'iri,
though there is no human probability, for there is no
promise to that effect; the grace of faith is needed to
believe that the Lord will give me the necessaries of life,
if I first seek the kingdom of God and his righteous-
ness, for there is a promise to that effect}-
March 18. These two days we have not been able to
purchase meat. The sister in whose house we lodge gave
us to-day part of her dinner. We are still looking to Jesus
for deliverance. We want money to pay the weekly rent
and to buy provisions. March 19. Our landlady sent
again of her meat for our dinner. We have but a half-
penny left. I feel myself very cold in asking for money :
still, I hope for deliverance, though I do not see whence
money is to come. We were not able to buy bread to-day
as usual. March 20. This has been again a day of very
great mercies. In the morning we met round our break-
fast which the Lord had provided for us, though we had
not a single penny left. The last halfpenny was spent for
milk. We were then still looking to Jesus for fresh sup-
plies. We both had no doubt that the Lord would inter-
fere. I felt it a trial that I had but little earnestness in
asking the Lord, and had this not been the case, perhaps
we might have had our wants sooner supplied. We have
iMatt. vL
1832. LEANING ON JESUS. 79
about seven pounds in the house ; but considering it no
longer our own, the Lord kept us from taking of it, with
the view of replacing what we had taken, as formerly I
might have done. The meat which was sent yesterday for
our dinner was enough also for to-day. Thus the Lord
had provided another meal. Two sisters called upon us
about noon, who gave us two pounds of sugar, one pound
of coffee, and two cakes of chocolate. Whilst they were
with us, a poor sister came and brought us one shilling from
herself and two shillings and sixpence from another poor
sister. Our landlady also sent us again of her dinner, and
also a loaf. Our bread would scarcely have been enough
for tea, had the Lord not thus graciously provided. In
the afternoon, the same sister who brought the money
brought us also, from another sister, one pound of butter
and two shillings, and from another sister five shillings.
CHAPTER V.
MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN.
1832 — 1835.
'HERE HAVE WE NO CONTINUING CITY" — CAUTION TO THE CHRISTIAN
TRAVELLER — NEW TOKENS FOR GOOD — THE WAY MADE CLEAR — MEET-
INGS FOR INQUIRY — NO RESPECT OF PERSONS WITH GOD — FRANCKE,
" BEING DEAD, YET SPEAKETH " — DAILY BREAD SUPPLIED — A PECULIAR
PEOPLE.
APRIL 8. I have felt much this day that Teignmouth is
no longer my place, and that I shall leave it. I wouM ob-
serve that in August of 1831 I began greatly to feel as if
my work at Teignmouth were done, and that I should go
somewhere else. I was led to consider the matter more
maturely, and at last had it settled in this way, — that it
was not likely to be of God, because, for certain reasons, I
should naturally have liked to leave Teignmouth. After-
wards, I felt quite comfortable in remaining there. In the
commencement of the year 1832 I began again much to
doubt whether Teignmouth was my place, or whether my
gift was not much more that of going about from place to
place, seeking to bring believers back to the Scriptures,
than to stay in one place and to labor as a pastor. I re-
solved to try whether it were not the will of God that I
should still give myself to pastoral work among the breth-
ren at Teignmouth ; and with more earnestness and faith-
fulness than ever I was enabled to give myself to this
1832. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 8l
work, and was certainly much refreshed and blessed in it-
and I saw immediately blessings result from it. This my
experience seemed more than ever to settle me at Teign-
moutli. But notwithstanding this, the impression that my
work was done there came back after some time, as the
remark in my journal of April 8 shows, and it became
stronger and stronger. There was one point remarkable
in connection with this. Wherever I went I preached
with much more enjoyment and power than at Teign-
mouth, the very reverse of which had been the case on my
first going there. Moreover, almost everywhere I had
many more hearers than at Teignmouth, and found the
people hungering after food, which, generally speaking,
was no longer the case at Teignmouth.
April 11. Felt again much that Teignmouth will not
much longer be my residence. April 12. Still feel the im-
pression that Teignmouth is no longer my place. April 13.
Found a letter from brother Craik, from Bristol, on my
return from Torquay, where I had been to preach. He
invites me to come and help him. It appears to me, from
what he writes, that such places as Bristol more suit my
gifts. O Lord, teach me ! I have felt this day more than
ever that I shall soon leave Teignmouth. I fear, however,
there is much connected with it which savors of the flesh,
itnd that makes me fearful. It seems to me as if I should
shortly go to Bristol, if the Lord permit. April 14. Wrote
a letter to brother Craik, in which I said I should come, if
I clearly saw it to be the Lord's will. Have felt again very
much to-day, yea, far more than ever, that I shall soon
leave Teignmouth.
April 15. Lord's day. This evening I preached, as fully
as time wrould permit, on the Lord's second coming. After
having done so, I told the brethren what effect this doc-
trine had had upon me, on first receiving it, even to deter-
mine me to leave London, and to preach throughout the
82 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. V.
kingdom ; but that the Lord had kept me chiefly at Teign-
mouth for these two years and three months, and that it
seemed to me now that the time was near when I should
leave them. I reminded them of what I told them when
they requested me to take the oversight of them, that I
could make no certain engagement, but stay only so long
with them as I should see it to be the Lord's will to do so.
There was much weeping afterwards. But I am now again
in peace.
April 16. This morning I am still in peace. I am glad
I have spoken to the brethren, that they may be prepared,
in case the Lord should take me away. I left to-day for
Dartmouth, where I preached in the evening. I had five
answers to prayer to-day. 1. I awoke at five, for which I
had asked the Lord last evening. 2. The Lord removed
from my dear wife an indisposition under which she had
been suffering. It would have been trying to me to have
had to leave her in that state. 3. The Lord sent us money.
4. There was a place vacant on the Dartmouth coach,
which only passes through Teignmouth. 5. This evening
I was assisted in preaching, and my own soul refreshed.
April 21. I would ofier here a word of warning to
believers. Often the work of the Lord itself may be a
temptation to keep us from that communion with him
which is so essential to the benefit of our own souls. On
the 19th I had left Dartmouth, conversed a good deal that
day, preached in the evening, walked afterwards eight
miles, had only about five hours' sleep, travelled again the
next day twenty-five miles, preached twice, and conversed
very much besides, went to bed at eleven, and arose before
five. All this shows that my body and spirit required rest,
and, therefore, however careless about the Lord's work I
might have appeared to my brethren, I ought to have had
a great deal of quiet time for prayer and reading the word,
especially as I had a long journey before me that day, and
1832. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 83
as I was going to Bristol, which in itself required much
prayer. Instead of this, I hurried to the prayer meeting,
after a few minutes' private prayer. But let none think
that public prayer will make up for closet communion.
Then again, afterwards, when I ought to have withdrawn
myself, as it were, by force, from the company of beloved
brethren and sisters, and given my testimony for the Lord,
(and, indeed, it would have been the best testimony I
could have given them,) by telling them that I needed
secret communion with the Lord, I did not do so, but
spent the time, till the coach came, in conversation with
them. Now, however profitable in some respects it may
have been made to those with whom I was on that morning,
yet my own soul needed food ; and not having had it, I was
lean, and felt the effects of it the whole day ; and hence I
believe it came that I was dumb on the coach, and did not
speak a word for Christ, nor give away a single tract, though
I had my pockets full on purpose.
April 22. This morning I preached at Gideon Chapel,
Bristol. In the afternoon I preached at the Pithay Chapel.
This sermon was a blessing to many, many souls ; and
many were brought through it to come afterwards to hear
brother Craik and me. Among others it was the means
of converting a young man who was a notorious drunkard,
and who was just again on his way to a public house, when
an acquaintance of his met him, and asked him to go with
him to hear a foreigner preach. He did so ; and from that
moment he was so completely altered, that he never again
went to a public house, and was so happy in the Lord after-
wards that he often neglected his supper, from eagerness
to read the Scriptures, as his wife told me. He died about
five months afterwards. This evening I was much in-
structed in hearing brother Craik preach. I am now
fully persuaded that Bristol is the place where the Lord
Will have me to labor.
84 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. V.
April 27. It seems to brother Craik and myself the
Lord's will that we should go home next week, in order
that in quietness, without being influenced by what we see
here, we may more inquire into the Lord's will concerning
us. It especially appears to us much more likely that we
should come to a right conclusion among the brethren and
sisters in Devonshire, whose tears we shall have to witness,
and whose entreaties to stay with them we shall have to
hear, than here in Bristol, where we see only those who
wish us to stay.
April 28. It still seems to us the Lord's will that we
should both leave soon, to have quiet time for prayer con-
cerning Bristol. April 29. I preached this morning on
Rev. iii. 14-22. As it afterwards appeared, that testimony
was blessed to many, though I lacked enjoyment in my
own soul. This afternoon brother Craik preached in a
vessel called the Clifton Ark, fitted up for a chapel. In
the evening I preached in the same vessel. These testi-
monies also God greatly honored, and made them the
means of afterwards bringing several, who then heard us,
to our meeting places. How was God with us, and how
did he help us, thereby evidently showing that he himself
had sent us to this city !
April 30. It was most affecting to take leave of the
dear children of God, dozens pressing us to return soon,
many with tears in their eyes. The blessing which the
Lord has given to our ministry seems to be very great.
We both see it fully the Lord's will to come here, though
we do not see under what circumstances. A brother has
promised to take Bethesda Chapel for us, and to be
answerable for the payment of the rent ; so that thus we
should have two large chapels. I saw, again, two in-
stances to-day in which my preaching has been blessed.
May 1. Brother Craik and I left this morning for Dev-
onshire.
1832. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUtf. 85
May 8. I saw several of the brethren to-day, and felt
so fully assured that it is the Lord's will that I should go
to Bristol, that I told them so. This evening I had a
meeting with the three deacons, when I told them plainly
about it ; asking them, if they see anything wrong in me
concerning this matter, to tell me of it. They had nothing
to say against it ; yea, though much wishing me to stay,
they were convinced themselves that my going is of God.
May 5. One other striking proof to my mind that my
leaving Teignmouth is of God, is, that some truly spiritual
believers, though they much wish me to stay, themselves
see that I ought to go to Bristol.
May 7. Having received a letter from Bristol on May
5, it was answered to-day in such a way that the Lord
may have another opportunity to prevent our going
thither if it be not of him.
May 15. Just when I was in prayer concerning Bristol,
I was sent for to come to brother Craik. Two letters had
arrived from Bristol. The brethren assembling at Gideon
accept our offer to come under the conditions we have
made, i. e. for the present, to consider us only as minis-
tering among them, but not in any fixed pastoral relation-
ship, so that we may preach as we consider it to be accord-
ing to the mind of God, without reference to any rules
among them ; that the pew-rents should be done away with;
and that we should go on., respecting the supply of our
temporal wants, as in Devonshire. We intend, the Lord
willing, to leave in about a week, though there is nothing
settled respecting Bethesda Chapel.
May 21. I began to-day to take leave of the brethren at
Teignmouth, calling on each of them. It has been a try-
ing day. Much weeping on the part of the saints. Were
I not so fully persuaded that it is the will of God we should
go to Bristol, I should have been hardly able to bear it.
May 22, The brethren at Teignmouth say that they
86 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. V
expect us soon back again. As far as I understand the
way in which God deals with his children, this seems very
unlikely. Towards the evening, the Lord, after repeated
prayer, gave me Col. i. 21-23 as a text for the last word
of exhortation. It seemed to me best to speak as little as
possible about myself, and as much as possible about Christ.
I scarcely alluded to our separation, and only commended
myself and the brethren, in the concluding prayer, to the
Lord. The parting scenes are very trying, but my full per-
suasion is that the separation is of the Lord. May 23.
My wife, Mr. Groves, my father-in-law, and I left this
morning for Exeter. Dear brother Craik intends to follow
us to-morrow.
We had unexpectedly received, just before we left
Teignmouth, about fifteen pounds, else we should not have
been able to defray all the expenses connected with leaving,
travelling, etc. By this, also, the Lord showed his mind
concerning our going to Bristol.
The following record will now show to the believing
reader how far what I have said concerning my persuasion
that it was the will of God that we should go to Bristol
has been proved by facts.
May 25, 1832. This evening we arrived at Bristol.
May 27. This morning we received a sovereign, sent to
us by a sister residing in Devonshire, which we take as
an earnest that the Lord will provide for us here also.
May 28. When we were going to speak to the brethren,
who manage the temporal affairs of Gideon Chapel, about
giving up the pew-rents, having all the seats free, and
receiving the free-will offerings through a box, a matter
which was not quite settled on their part, as brother Craik
and I had thought, we found that the Lord had so
graciously ordered this matter for us that there was not
the least objection on the part of these brethren.
June 4. For several days we have been looking about
1832. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 87
for lodgings, but finding none plain and cheap enough, we
were led to make this also a subject of earnest prayer ;
and now, immediately afterwards, the Lord has given us
such as are suitable. We pay only eighteen shillings a week
for two sitting-rooms and three bedrooms, coals, and attend-
ance. It was particularly difficult to find cheap furnished
lodgings, having five rooms in the same house, which we
need, as brother Craik and we live together. How good
is the Lord to have thus appeared for us, in answer to
prayer, and what an encouragement to commit everything
to him. in prayer !
June 25. To-day it was finally settled to take Bethesda
Chapel for a twelvemonth, on condition that a brother at
once paid the rent, with the understanding that, if the
Lord shall bless our labors in that place, so that believers
are gathered together in fellowship, he expects them to
help him ; but if not, that he will pay all. This was the
only way in which we could take the chapel ; for we could
not think it to be of God to have had this chapel, though
there should be every prospect of usefulness, if it had made
us in any way debtors.
July 6. To-day we commenced preaching at Bethesda
Chapel. It was a good day. July 13. To-day we heard
of the first cases of cholera in Bristol. July 16. This
evening, from six to nine o'clock, we had appointed for
conversing at the vestry, one by one, with individuals who
wished to speak to us about their souls. There were so
many that we were engaged from six till twenty minutes
past ten.
These meetings we have continued ever since, twice a
week, or once a week, or once a fortnight, or once a month,
as our strength and time allowed it, or as they seemed
needed. We have found them beneficial in the following
respects : —
1, Many persons, on account of timidity, would prefer
88 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAI. V.
coming at an appointed time to the vestry to converse
with us, to calling on us in our own house. 2. The very
fact of appointing a time for seeing people, to converse
with them in private concerning the things of eternity,
has brought some, who, humanly speaking, never would
have called upon us under other circumstances ; yea, it has
brought even those who, though they thought they were
concerned about the things of God, yet were completely
ignorant ; and thus we have had an opportunity of speaking
to them. 3. These meetings have also been a great en-
couragement to ourselves in the work, for often, when we
thought that such and such expositions of the word had
done no good at all, it was through these meetings found
to be the reverse ; and likewise, when our hands were
hanging down, we have been afresh encouraged to go for-
ward in the work of the Lord, and to continue sowing
the seed in hope, by seeing at these meetings fresh cases
in which the Lord has condescended to use us as instru-
ments, particularly as in this way instances have some-
times occurred in which individuals have spoken to us
about the benefit which they derived from our ministry
not only a few months before, but even as long as two,
three, and four years before.
For the above reasons I would particularly recommend
to other servants of Christ, especially to those who live
hi large towns, if they have not already introduced a simi-
lar plan, to consider whether it may not be well for them
also to set apart such times for seeing inquirers. Those
meetings, however, require much prayer, to be enabled to
speak aright to all those who come, according to their
different need ; and one is led continually to feel that one
is not sufficient of one's self for these things, but that our
sufficiency can be alone of God. These meetings also
have been by far the most wearing-out part of all our
Work, though at the same time the most refreshing.
1832. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 80
July 18. To-day I spent the whole morning in the
vestry, to procure a quiet season. This has now for some
time been the only way, on account of the multiplicity of
engagements, to make sure of time for prayer, reading the
word, and meditation. July 19. I spent from half past
nine till one in the vestry, and had real communion with
the Lord. The Lord be praised, who has put it into my
mind to use the vestry for a place of retirement !
August 5. When all our money was gone to-day, the
Lord again graciously supplied our wants. August 6.
This afternoon, from two till after six, brother Craik and
I spent in the vestry, to see the inquirers. We have had
again, in seeing several instances of blessing upon our
labors, abundant reason brought before us to praise the
Lord for having sent us to BristoL
August 13. This evening one brother and four sisters
united with brother Craik and me in church-fellowship
at Bethesda, without any rules, desiring only to act as the
Lord shall le pleased to give its light through his word.
September 17. This morning the Lord, in addition to
all his other mercies, has given us a little girl, who, with
her mother, is doing well.
October 1. A meeting for inquirers this afternoon from
two to five. Many more are convinced of sin through
brother Craik's preaching than my own. This circumstance
led me to inquire into the reasons, which are probably
these : 1. That brother Craik is more spiritually minded
than I am. 2. That he prays more earnestly for the con-
version of sinners than I do. 3. That he more frequently
addresses sinners, as such, in his public ministrations, than
I do. This led me to more frequent and earnest prayer
for the conversion of sinners, and to address them more
frequently as such. The latter had never been intention-
ally left undone, but it had not been so frequently brought
\Q my mind as to that of brother Craik. Since then, the
90 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. V.
cases in which it has pleased the Lord to use me as an
instrumc nt of conversion have been quite as many as these
it which brother Craik has been used.
February 9, 1833. I read a part of Franke's life. The
Lord graciously help me to follow him, as far as he fol-
lowed Christ. Most of the Lord's people whom we know
in Bristol are poor, and if the Lord were to give us grace
to live more as this dear man of God did, we might
draw much more than we have as yet done out of our
heavenly Father's bank, for our poor brethren and sisters.
March 2. A man in the street ran up to brother Craik
and put a paper containing ten shillings into his hand, say-
ing, " That is for you and Mr. Miiller," and went hastily
away. May 28. This morning, whilst sitting in my room,
the distress of several brethren and sisters was brought to
my mind, and I said to myself, " O that it might please
the Lord to give me means to help them!" About an
hour afterwards I received sixty pounds from a brother
whom up to this day I never saw, and who then lived, as
he does still, a distance of several thousand miles.
May 29. Review of the last twelve months, as it regards
the fruits of our labors in Bristol : 1. The total number of
those added to us within the year has been one hundred
and nine. 2. There have been converted through our instru-
mentality, so far as we have heard and can judge respect-
ing the individuals, sixty-five. 3. Many backsliders have
been reclaimed, and many of the children of God have
been encouraged and strengthened in the way of truth.
June 12. I felt, this morning, that we might do some-
thing for the souls of those poor boys and girls, and grown-
up or aged people, to whom we have daily given bread for
some time past, in establishing a school for them, reading
the Scriptures to them, and speaking to them about the
Lord. This desire was not carried out. The chief obsta-
cle in the way was a pressure of work coming upon brother
1833. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 91
Craik and me just about that time. Shortly after, the
number of the poor who came for bread increased to
between sixty and eighty a day, whereby our neighbors
were molested, as the beggars were lying about in troops
in the street, on account of which we were obliged to tell
them no longer to come for bread. This thought ulti-
mately issued in the formation of the Scriptural Knowledge
Institution, and in the establishment of the Orphan Houses.
December 17. This evening brother Craik and I took
tea with a family of whom five had been brought to the
knowledge of the Lord through our instrumentality. As
an encouragement to brethren who may desire to preach
the gospel in a language not their own, I would mention
that the first member of this family who was converted
came merely out of curiosity to hear my foreign accent,
some words having been mentioned to her which I did not
pronounce properly.
December 31. In looking over my journal, I find, —
1. That at least two hundred and sixty persons (according
to the number of names we have marked down, -but there
have been many more) have come to converse with u»
about the concerns of their souls. Out of these, one hun-
dred and fifty-three have been added to us in fellowship
these last eighteen months, sixty of whom have been
brought to the knowledge of the Lord through our instru-
mentality.
2. In looking over the Lord's dealings with me as to
temporal things, I find that he has sent me, during the past
year, —
1. In freewill offerings through the boxes, as my part . £152 14 5;
2. Presents in money given to me 25 1 3
3. Presents in clothes and nrovisions, worth, at least . 20 0 0
4. A brother sent me, from a distance 60 0 C
t>. We live free of rent, whicu 13 worth for our par* . 10 0 0^
£267 15 84
92 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. V,
It is just now four years since I first began to trust in
the Lord alone for the supply of my temporal wants. My
little all I then had, at most worth one hundred pounds a
year, I gave up for the Lord, having then nothing left but
about five pounds. The Lord greatly honored this little
sacrifice, and he gave me, in return, not only as much as I
had given up, but considerably more. For during the first
year, he sent me already, in one way or other, including
what came to me through family connection, about one
hundred and thirty pounds. During the second year, one
hundred and fifty-one pounds eighteen shillings and eight
pence. During the third year, one hundred and ninety-five
pounds three shillings. During this year, two hundred and
sixty-seven pounds fifteen shillings and eight and one
fourth pence. The following points require particular
notice : 1. During the last three years and three months I
never have asked any one for anything ; but, by the help
of the Lord, I have been enabled at all times to bring my
wants to him, and he graciously has supplied them all. 2.
At the close of each of these four years, though my income
has been comparatively great, I have had only a few shil-
lings or nothing at all left ; and thus it is also to-day, by
the help of God. 3. During the last year a considerable
part of my income has come from a distance of several
thousand miles, from a brother whom I never saw. 4. Since
we have been obliged to discontinue the giving away of
bread to about fifty poor people every day, on account of
our neighbors, our income has not been during the second
part of this year nearly so great, scarcely one half as much,
as during the first part of it.
January 9, 1834. Brother Craik and I have preached
during these eighteen months, once a month, at Brisling-
ton, a village near Bristol, but have not seen any fruit of
our labors there. This led me to-day very earnestly to
pray to the Lord for the conversion of sinners in that
1834. MINISTRY AT BRISTOL BEGUN. 93
place. I was also, in the chapel, especially led to pray
again about this, and asked the Lord in particular that he
would be pleased to convert, at least, one soul this evening,
that we might have a little encouragement. I preached
with much help, and I hope there has been good done this
evening. The Lord did according to my request. There
was a young man brought to the knowledge of the truth.
January 14. I was greatly tried by the difficulty of
fixing upon a text from which to preach on the morning
of October 20, and at last preached without enjoyment.
To-day I heard of a NINTH instance in which this very
sermon has been blessed.
January 31. This evening a Dorcas Society was formed
among the sisters in communion with us, but not accord-
ing to the manner in which we found one when we came
to Bristol ; for, as we have dismissed all teachers from the
Sunday School who were not real believers, so now believ-
ing females only will meet together to make clothes for
the poor. The being mixed up with unbelievers had not
only proved a barrier to spiritual conversation among the
sisters, but must have been also injurious to both parties
in several respects. One sister, now united to us in
fellowship, acknowledged that the being connected with
the Dorcas Society, previous to her conversion, had been,
in a measure, the means of keeping her in security; as
she thought that, by helping on such like things, she
might gain heaven at last. O that the saints, in faithful
love, according to the word of God (2 Cor. vi. 14-18),
might be more separated in all spiritual matters from un-
believers, and not be unequally yoked together with them!
VI.
THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLJ05GE INSTITUTION
1834 — 1835.
UNSCRIFTURAL CHARACTER OF THE EXISTING RELICIOU3 AND BENEVO-
LENT SOCIETIES — A NEW INSTITUTION PROPOSED — GOD'S WORD THE
ONLY RULE, AND GOD'S PROMISE THE ONLY DEPENDENCE — " IN EVERY-
THING, LET YOUR REQUEST BE MADE KNOWN UNTO GOD" — EARNEST
OP THE DIVINE BLESSING ON THE INSTITUTION — BEREAVEMENT —
HELPER SEASONABLY SENT — REWARD OF SEEKING GOD'S FACE.
FEB. 21. I was led this morning to form a plan for
establishing, upon scriptural principles, an institution for
the spread of the gospel at home and abroad. I trust this
matter is of God. Feb. 25. I was led again this day to
pray about the forming of a new Missionary Institution,
and felt still more confirmed that we should do so.
[Some readers may ask why we formed a new Institu-
tion for the spread of the gospel, and why we did not
unite with some of the religious societies, already in exist-
ence, seeing that there are several missionary, Bible,
tract, and school societies. I give, therefore, our rea-
sons, in order to show that nothing but the desire to main-
tain a good conscience led us to act as we have done. For
as, by the grace of God, we acknowledged the word of
God as the only rule of action for. the disciples of the
Lord Jesus, we found, in comparing the then existing reli-
gious societies with the word of God, that they departed
1834. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 95
so far from it, that we could not DC united with them, ami
yet maintain a good conscience. I only mention here the
following points.
1. The end which these religious societies propose to
themselves, and which is constantly put before their mem-
bers, is, that the world will gradually become better and
better, and that at last the whole world will be converted.
To this end, there is constantly reference made to the
passage in Habakkuk ii. 14 : " For the earth shall be filled
with the knowledge of the glory of the Lord, as the waters
cover the sea ; " or the one in Isaiah xi. 9 : " For the earth
shall be full of the knowledge of the Lord, as the waters
cover the sea." But that these passages can have no ref-
erence to the present dispensation, but to the one which
will commence with the return of the Lord, — that in the
present dispensation things will not become spiritually
better, but rather worse, — and that in the present dispen-
sation it is not the whole world that will be converted,
but only a people gathered out from among the Gentiles
for the Lord, — is clear from many passages of the divine
testimony, of which I only refer to the following : Matt,
xiii. 24-30, and verses 36-43, 2 Tim. iii. 1-13, Acts xv. 14.
A hearty desire for the conversion of sinners, and ear-
nest prayer for it to the Lord, is quite scriptural ; but it is
unscriptural to expect the conversion of the whole world.
Such an end AVC could not propose to ourselves in the ser-
vice of the Lord.
2. But that which is worse, is, th^ connection of those
religious societies with the world, which is completely con-
trary to the word of God (2 Cor. vi. 14-18). In temporal
things the children of God need, whilst they remain here
on earth, to make use of the world ; but when the work to
be done requires that those who attend to it should be
possessed of spiritual life (of which unbelievers are utterly
destitute), the children of God are bound, by their loyalty
96 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VL
to their Lord, entirely to refrain from association with the
unregenerate. But, alas ! the connection with the world is
but too marked in these religious societies ; for every one
who pays a guinea, or, in some societies, half-a-guinea, is
considered as a member. Although such an individual
may live in sin ; although he may manifest to every one
that he does not know the Lord Jesus ; if only the guinea
or the half-guinea be paid, he is considered a member, and
has a right as such to vote. Moreover, whoever pays a
larger sum, for instance, ten pounds or twenty pounds, can
be, in many societies, a member for life, however openly sin-
ful his life should be for the time, or should become after-
wards. Surely such things ought not to be.
3. The means which are made use of in these religious
societies to obtain money for the work of the Lord are
also in other respects unscriptural; for it is a most com-
mon case to ask the unconverted for money, which even
Abraham would not have done (Genesis xiv. 21-24) ; and
how much less should ice do it, who are not only forbidden
to have fellowship with unbelievers in all such matters
(2 Cor. vi. 14-18), but who are also in fellowship with the
Father and the Son, and can therefore obtain everything
from the Lord which we possibly can need in his service,
without being obliged to go to the unconverted world !
How altogether differently the first disciples acted, in this
respect, we learn from 3 John 7.
4. Not merely, however, in these particulars is there a
connection with the w*orld in these religious societies ; but
it is not a rare thing for even committee members (the
individuals who manage the affairs of the societies) to be
manifestly unconverted persons, if not open enemies to
the truth ; and this is suffered because they are rich, or of
influence, as it is called.
5. It is a most common thing to endeavor to obtain
for patrons and presidents of these societies and for chair-
1834. THE SCRIPTTTKAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 97
men at the public meetings, persons of rank or wealth, to
attract the public. Never once have I known a case of a
POOR, but very devoted, wise, and experienced servant of
Christ being invited to fill the chair at such public meet-
ings. Surely, the Galilean fishermen, who were apos-
tles, or our Lord himself, who was called the carpenter,
would not have been called to this office, according to
these principles. These things ought not so to be among
the disciples of the Lord Jesus, who should not judge with
reference to a person's fitness for service in the church of
Christ by the position he fills in the world, or by the
wealth he possesses.
6. Almost all these societies contract debts, so that it
is a comparatively rare case to read a report of any of
them without finding that they have expended more than
they have received, which, however, is contrary both to
the spirit and to the letter of the New Testament. (Rom.
Tiii. 8.)
Now, although brother Craik and I were ready, by the
grace of God, heartily to acknowledge that there are not
only many true children of God connected with these
religious societies, but that the Lord has also blessed their
efforts in many respects, notwithstanding the existence of
these and other principles and practices which we judged,
to be unscriptural; yet it appeared to us to be his will
that we should be entirely separate from these societies,
(though we should be considered as singular persons, or
though it should even appear that we' despised other
persons, or would elevate ourselves above them,) in order
that, by the blessing of God, we might direct the attention
of the children of God in those societies to their unscrip-
tural practices ; and we would rather be entirely uncon-
nected with these societies than act contrary to the Holy
Scriptures. We therefore separated entirely from them,
although we remained united in brotherly love with indi-
9
98 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHAP. YL
vidual believers belonging to them, and wot Id by no
means judge them for remaining in connection with them,
if they do not see that such things are contrary to Scrip-
ture. But seeing them to be so ourselves, we could not
with a clear conscience remain. After we had thus gone
on for some time, we considered that it would have an
injurious tendency upon the brethren among whom we
labored, and also be at variance with the spirit of the
gospel of Christ, if we did nothing at all for missionary
objects, the circulation of the Holy Scriptures, tracts, etc.,
and we were therefore led, for these and other reasons, to
do something for the spread of the gospel at home and
abroad, however small the beginning might be.]
March 5. This evening, at a public meeting, brother
Craik and I stated the principles on which we intend to
carry on the institution which we propose to establish for
the spread of the gospel at home and abroad. There was
nothing outwardly influential either in the number of
people present or in our speeches. May the Lord gra-
ciously be pleased to grant his blessing upon the institu-
tion, which will be called " The Scriptural Knowledge
Institution, for Home and Abroad."
I. THE PRINCIPLES OF THE INSTITUTION.
1. We consider every believer bound, in one way or
other, to help the cause of Christ, and we have scriptural
warrant for expecting the Lord's blessing upon our work
of faith and labor of love ; and although, according to
Matt. xiii. 24-43, 2 Tim. iii. 1-13, and many other pas-
sages, the world will not be converted before the coming
of our Lord Jesus, still, while he tarries, all scriptural
means ought to be employed for the ingathering of tho
elect of God.
1834. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 99
2. The Lord helping us, we do not mean to seek the
patronage of the world ; i. e. we never intend to ask uncon-
verted persons of rank or wealth to countenance this Insti-
tution, because this, we consider, would be dishonorable to
the Lord. In the name of our God we set up our ban-
ners, Ps. xx. 5 ; he alone shall be our patron, and if he
Lelps us we shall prosper, and if he is not on our side we
shall not succeed.
3. We do not mean to asJc unbelievers for money (2
Cor. vi. 14-18) ; though we do not feel ourselves warranted
to refuse their contributions, if they of their own accord
should offer them. Acts xxviii. 2-10.
4. We reject altogether the help of unbelievers in
managing or carrying on the affairs of the Institution. 2
Cor. vi. 14-18.
5. We intend never to enlarge the field of labor by-
contracting debts (Rom. xiii. 8), and afterwards appealing
to the Church of Christ for help, because this we consider
to be opposed both to the letter and the spirit of the New
Testament; but in secret prayer, God helping us, we shall
carry the wants of the Institution to the Lord, and act
according to the means that God shall give.
6. We do not mean to reckon the success of the Insti-
tution by the amount of money given, or the number of
Bibles distributed, etc., but by the Lord's blessing upon
the work (Zech. iv. 6) ; and we expect this in the pro-
portion in which he shall help us to wait upon him in
prayer.
7. While we would avoid aiming after needless singu-
larity, WQ desire to go on simply according to Scripture,
without compromising the truth ; at the same time thank-
fully receiving any instruction which experienced believ-
ers, after prayer, upon scriptural ground, may have to give
as concerning the Institution.
100 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VL
H. THE OBJECTS OF THE INSTITUTION.
1. To assist day schools, Sunday schools, and aduJt
schools, in which instruction is given upon scriptural
principles, and as far as the Lord may give the means,
and supply us with suitable teachers, and in other respects
make our path plain, to establish schools of this kind.
With this we also combine the putting of poor children
to such day schools.
a. By day schools upon scriptural principles, we under-
stand day schools in which the teachers are godly persons,
— in which the way of salvation is scripturally pointed
out, — and in which no instruction is given opposed to the
principles of the gospel.
b. Sunday schools, in which all the teachers are believ-
ers, and in which the Holy Scriptures are alone the foun-
dation of instruction, are such only as the Institution
assists with the supply of Bibles, Testaments, etc.; for we
consider it unscriptural that any persons who do not pro-
fess to know the Lord themselves should be allowed to
give religious instruction.
c. The Institution does not assist any adult school with
the supply of Bibles, Testaments, spelling-books, etc., ex-
cept the teachers are believers.
2. To circulate the Holy Scriptures.
3. The third object of this Institution is to aid mission-
ary efforts.
We desire to assist those missionaries whose proceedings
appear to be most according to the Scriptures.
March 7. To-day we have only one shilling left. This
evening, when we came home from our work, we found a
brother, our tailor, waiting for us, who brought a new suit
of clothes both for brother Craik and me, which a brother,
whose name was not to be mentioned, had ordered for us.
1834. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 101
April 23. Yesterday and to-day I had asked the Lor&
to send us twenty pounds, that we might be able to pro-
cure a larger stock of Bibles and Testaments than our
small funds of the Scripti"Ml Knowledge Institution would
allow us to purchase ; and this evening a sister, unasked,
promised to give us that sum, adding that she felt a partic-
ular pleasure in circulating the Holy Scriptures, as the
simple reading of them had been the means of bringing
her to the knowledge of the Lord.
June 8. Lord's day. I obtained no text yesterday, not-
withstanding repeated prayer and reading of the word.
This morning I awoke with these words : "My grace is
sufficient for thee." As soon as I had dressed myself, I
turned to 2 Cor. xii. to consider this passage ; but in doing
so, after prayer, I was led to think that I had not been
directed to this portion for the sake of speaking on it, as
I at first thought, and I therefore followed my usual
practice in such cases, i. e. to read on in the Scriptures
where I left off last evening. In doing so, when I came
to Heb. xi. 13-16, 1 felt that this was the text. Having
prayed, I was confirmed in it, and the Lord was pleased to
open this passage to me. I preached on it with great
enjoyment. It pleased God greatly to bless what I said on
that passage, and at least one soul was brought through it
to the Lord.
June 25. These last three days I have had very little
real communion with God, and have therefore been very-
weak spiritually, and have several times felt irritability of
temper.
June 26. I was enabled, by the grace of God, to rise
early, and I had nearly two hours in prayer before break-
fast. I feel now this morning more comfortable. .
July 11. I have prayed much about a master for boys'
school, to be established in connection with our little Insti-
tution. Eight have applied for the situation, but none
9*
102 THE LIFE OP TEUST. CHAP. VI
seemed to be suitable. Now, at last, the Lord has giren us
a brother, who will commence the work.
October 9. Our little Institution, established in depend-
ence upon the Lord, and supplied by him with means, haa
now been seven montLs in operation, and through it have
been benefited with instruction, — 1. In the Sunday school,
about 120 children. 2. In the adult school, about 40
adults. 3. In the two day schools for boys and the two
days schools for girls, 209 children, of whom 54 have been
entirely free; the others pay about one third of the expense.
There have been also circulated 482 Bibles and 520 New
Testaments. Lastly, fifty-seven pounds has been spent
to aid missionary exertion. The means which the Lord
has sent us, as the fruit of many prayers, during these
seven months, amount to one hundred and sixty-seven
pounds ten shillings and halfpenny.
October 28. We heard a most affecting account of a
poor little orphan boy who for some time attended one of
our schools, and who seems there, as far as we can judge, to
have been brought to a real concern about his soul, through
what I said concerning the torments of hell, and who
some time ago was taken to the poorhouse, some miles out
of Bristol. He has expressed great sorrow that he can no
longer attend our school and ministry. May this, if it be
the Lord's will, lead me to do something also for the sup-
ply of the temporal wants of poor children, the pressure
of which has caused this poor boy to be taken away from
our school !
November 4. I spent the greater part of the morning in
reading the word and in prayer, and asked also for our
daily bread, for we have scarcely any money left. No-
vember 5. I spent almost the whole of the day in prayer
and reading the word. I prayed also again for the supply
of our temporal wants, but the Lord has not as yet ap-
peared. November 8. Saturday. The Lord h-
1835. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 105
ciously again supplied our temporal wants during this week,
though at the commencement of it we had but little left.
I have prayed much this week, for money, more than any
other week, as far as I remember, since we have been in
Bristol. The Lord has supplied us through our selling
what we did not need, or by our being paid what was
owed to us.
December 10. To-day we found that a departed brother
had left both to brother Craik and me twelve pounds.
December 31, 1834. 1. Since brother Craik and I have
been laboring in Bristol, 227 brethren and sisters have been
added to us in fellowship. Out of the 227 who have been
added to us, 103 have been converted through our instru-
mentality, and many have been brought into the liberty of
the gospel, or reclaimed from backsliding. Forty-seven
young converts are at Gideon, and fifty-six at Bethesda.
2. The income which the Lord has given me during this
year is : —
1. My part of the freewill offerings thro£on the boxes, £135 13 2J
2. Money given to me by saints in and out of Bristol 92 7 6
Altogether ... ..... £228 0 8£
3. Besides this, many articles in provisions, clotliing,
and furniture, worth to us about . . . 60 0 0
January 1, 1835. We had last evening an especial
prayer meeting, for the sake of praising the Lord for all
his many mercies, which we have received during the past
year, and to ask him to continue to us his favor. January
13. I visited from house to house the people living in
Orange Street, and saw in this way the families living in
nine houses, to ascertain whether any individuals wanted
Bibles, whether they could read, whether they wished their
children put to our day schools or Sunday school, with
the view of helping them accordingly. This afforded
opportunities to converse with them about their souls.
104 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VL
January 15. This morning I went again from houae to
house in Orange Street. I should greatly delight in being
frequently engaged in such work, for it is a most impor-
tant one ; but our hands are so full with other work that
we can do but little in this way. January 21. Received,
in answer to prayer, from an unexpected quarter, five
pounds, for the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. The
Lord pours in, whilst we seek to pour out. For during the
past week, merely among the poor, in going from house
to house, fifty-eight copies of the Scriptures were sold at
reduced prices, the going on with which is most impor-
tant, but will require much means.
January 28. I have, for these several days, prayed much
to ascertain whether the Lord will have me to go as a mis-
sionary to the East Indies, and I am most willing to go, if
he will condescend to use me in this way. January 29.
I have been greatly stirred up to pray about going to Cal-
cutta as a missionary. May the Lord guide me in this
matter ! (After all my repeated and earnest prayer in the
commencement of 1835, and willingness on my part to go.
if it were the Lord's will, still, he did not send me.)
February 25. In the name of the Lord, and in depend-
ence upon him alone for support, we have established a
fifth day school for poor children, which to-day has been
opened. We have now two boys' schools and three girls'
schools.
Mr. Miiller having determined to visit Germany,
chiefly on missionary business, reached London Feb-
ruary 27, and writes; —
This morning I went to the Alien Office for my pass-
port. On entering the office, I saw a printed paper, in
which it is stated that every alien neglecting to renew
every six months his certificate of residence, which he
1835. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 105
receives on depositing his passport, subjects himself to a
penalty of fifty pounds, or imprisonment. This law J
have ignorantly broken ever since I left London, in 1829.
It appeared to me much better to confess at once that I
had ignorantly done so than now wilfully break it ; trust-
ing in the Lord as it regarded the consequences of the step.
I did so, and the Lord inclined the heart of the officer with
whom I had to do to pass over my non-compliance with
the law, on account of my having broJcen it ignorantly.
Having obtained my passport, I found an unexpected
difficulty in the Prussian ambassador refusing to sign it, as
it did not contain a description of my person, and there-
fore I needed to prove that I was the individual spoken of
in the passport. This difficulty was not removed for three
days, when, after earnest prayer, through a paper signed
by some citizens of London, to whom I am known, the
ambassador was satisfied. This very difficulty, when once
the Lord had removed it, afforded me cause for thanksgiv-
ing ; for I now obtained a new passport, worded in a way
that, should I ever need it again, will prevent similar diffi-
culties.
Mr. Miiller was absent for five weeks, during which
time he experienced many answers to prayer and
encouragements to faith.
April 15. Bristol. Yesterday, at one, we landed in Lon-
don. In answer to prayer, I soon obtained my things
from the custom-house, and reached my friends in Chancery
Lane a little before two.
June 3. To-day we had a public meeting on account of
the Scriptural Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad.
It is now fifteen months since, in dependence upon the
Lord for the supply of means, we have been enabled to
provide poor children with schooling, circulate the Holy
106 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHAP. VL
Scriptures, and aid missionary labors. During this time,
though the field of labor has been continually enlarging,
and though we have now and then been brought low in
funds, the Lord has never allowed us to be obliged to stop
the work. We have been enabled during this time to
establish three day schools, and to connect with the
Institution two other charity day schools, which, humanly
speaking, otherwise would have been closed for want of
means. The number of the children that have been thus
provided with schooling, in the day schools only, amounts
to 439. The number of copies of the Holy Scriptures
which have been circulated is 795 Bibles and 753 New
Testaments. We have also sent, in aid of missionary
labors in Canada, in the East Indies, and on the Continent
of Europe, one hundred and seventeen pounds, eleven
shillings. The whole amount of the free-will offerings put
into our hands for carrying on this work from March 5,
1834, to May 19, 1835, is £363 12s. Old.
June 22. This morning at two my father-in-law died.
June 25. Our little boy is so ill that I have no hope of his
recovery. The Lord's holy will be done concerning the
dear little one. June 26. My prayer, last evening, was,
that God would be pleased to support my dear wife under
the trial, should he remove the little one ; and to take
him soon to himself, thus sparing him from suffering. 1
did not pray for the child's recovery. It was but two
hours after that the dear little one went home. I am so
fully enabled to realize that the dear infant is so much
better off with the Lord Jesus than with us, that I scarcely
feel the loss at all, and when I weep I weep for joy.
July 18. I have felt for several days weak in my chest.
This weakness has been increasing, and to-day I have felt
it more than ever. I have thought it well to refrain next
week from all public speaking. May the Lord grant that
I may be brought nearer to him through this, for I am not
1835. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 107
at all in the state in which I ought to be, and I think
sometimes that our late afflictions have been lost upon me,
and that the Lord will need to chastise me severely.
July 31. To-day brother C r, formerly a minister in
the establishment, who came to us a few days since, began,
in connection with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution,
to go from house to house to spread the truth as a city
missionary. [This was a remarkable interposition of God.
Brother Craik had before this, for some months, been
unable, on account of bodily infirmity, to labor in the work
of the schools, the circulation of the Scriptures, etc., and
my own weakness, shortly after brother C r's arrival,
increased so that I was obliged to give up the work entirely.
How gracious, therefore, of the Lord to send brother
C r, that thus the work might go on ! Up to July,
1837, this beloved brother was enabled to continue in his
work, and thus this little Institution was in a most impor-
tant way enlarged as it regards the field of labor.]
August 24. I feel very weak, and suffer more than be-
fore from the disease. I am in doubt whether to leave
Bristol entirely for a time. I have no money to go away
for a change of air. I have had an invitation to stay for
a week with a sister in the country, and I think of ac-
cepting the invitation, and going to-morrow. August
26. To-day I had five pounds given to me for the ex-
press purpose of using change of air. August 29. To-
day I received another five pounds for the same purpose.
August 30. To-day, for the first Lord's day since our
arrival in Bristol, I have been kept from preaching through
illness. How mercifully has the Lord dealt in giving me
so much strength for these years ! I had another five
pounds sent to aid me in procuring change of air. How
kind is the Lord in thus providing me with the means
for leaving Bristol ! September 2. Went with my family
to Portishead.
108 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. VL
September 15. As I clearly understood that the person
who lets me his horse has no license, I saw that, being
bound as a believer to act according to the laws of the
country, I could use it no longer ; and as horse exercise
seems most important, humanly speaking, for my resto-
ration, and as this is the only horse which is to be had
in the place, we came to the conclusion to leave Portis-
head to-morrow. Immediately after, I received a kind
letter from a brother and two sisters in the Lord, who live
in the Isle of Wight, which contained a fourth invitation,
more pressing than ever, to come and stay with them for
some time. In addition to this, they wrote that they had
repeatedly prayed about the matter, and were persuaded
that I ought to come. This matter has been to-day a
subject for prayer.
September 16. We came this morning to the conclusion
that I should go to the Isle of Wight ; but we saw not
how my wife and child and our servant could accompany
me, as we had not sufficient money for travelling expenses ;
and yet this seemed of importance. The Lord graciously
removed the difficulty this evening; for we received,
most unexpectedly and unasked for, five pounds and thir-
teen shillings, which was owed to us, and also, when we
had already retired to rest, a letter was brought, contain-
ing a present of two pounds. How very, very kind and
tender is the Lord!
September 19. This evening we arrived at our friends'
in the Isle of Wight, by whom we were most kindly
received.
September 29. Last evening, when I retired from the
family, I had a desire to go to rest at once, for I had prayed
a short while before ; and feeling weak in body, the cold-
ness of the night was a temptation to me to pray no fur-
thei. However, the Lord did help me to fall upon my
knees ; and no sooner had I commenced praying than he
1835. THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION. 100
shone into my soul, and gave me such a spirit of prayer
as I had not enjoyed for many weeks. He graciously
once more revived his work in my heart. I enjoyed that
nearness to God and fervency in prayer, for more than an
hour, for which my soul had been panting for many weeks
past. For the first time, during this illness, I had now
also a spirit of prayer as regards my health. I could ask
the Lord earnestly to restore me again, which had not been
the case before. I now long to go back again to the work
in Bristol, yet without impatience, and feel assured that
the Lord will strengthen me to return to it. I went to
bed especially happy, and awoke this morning in great
peace, rose sooner than usual, and had again, for more than
an hour, real communion with the Lord, before breakfast.
May he in mercy continue this state of heart to his most
unworthy child !
October 9. I have many times had thoughts of giving
hi print some account of the Lord's goodness to me, for the
instruction, comfort, and encouragement of the children of
God. I have considered to-day all the reasons for and
against, and find that there are scarcely any against, and
many for it.
November 15. Bristol. Brother C r and I have
been praying together, the last five days, that the Lord
would be pleased to send us means for carrying on the
work of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. This even-
ing, a brother gave me six shillings and one penny, being
money which he formerly used to pay towards the support
of a trade club, which he has lately given up for the Lord's
sake. November 18. This evening thirty pounds were
given to me; twenty-five pounds for the Scriptural Knowl-
edge Institution, and five pounds for myself. This is a
most remarkable answer to prayer. Brother C r and
I have prayed repeatedly together during the last week
concerning the work, and especially that the Lord would
10
110 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VI
be pleased to giv^e us the means to continue, and even
enlarge the field. In addition to this, I have several times
asked for a supply for myself, and he has kindly granted
both these requests. O that I may have grace to trust
him more and more 1
CHAPTER VII.
HOME FOR DESTITUTE ORPHANS.
1835 — 1836.
FR AS RE'S -WORKS FOLLOW HIM — A GREAT UNDERTAKING CONCEIVED —
REASONS FOR ESTABLISHING AN ORPHAN HOUSE — PRATER FOR GUID-
ANCE—TREASURE LAID UP IN HEAVEN — IN PRATER AND IN FAITH,
THE WORK IS BEGUN.
NOVEMBER 20. This evening I took tea at a sister's
house, where I found France's life. I have frequently, for
a long time, thought of laboring in a similar way, on a
much smaller scale ; not to imitate Franke, but in reliance
upon the Lord. May God make it plain! November 21.
To-day I have had it very much impressed on my heart,
no longer merely to think about the establishment of an
orphan house, but actually to set about it, and I have been
very much in prayer respecting it, in order to ascertain the
Lord's mind. November 23. To-day I had ten pounds
sent from Ireland, for our Institution. The Lord, in
answer to prayer, has given me, in a few days, about fifty
pounds. I had asked only for forty pounds. This has
been a great encouragement to me, and has still more
stirred me up to think and pray about the establishment
of an orphan house. Nov. 25. I have been again much
in prayer yesterday and to-day about the orphan house^
112 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VII.
and am more and more convinced that it is of God. May
he in mercy guide me !
It may be well to enter somewhat minutely upon
the reasons which led me to establish an orphan house.
Through my pastoral labors, through my correspondence,
and through brethren who visited Bristol, I had constantly
cases brought before me, which proved that one of the
especial things which the children of God needed in our
day, was, to have their faith strengthened. I might visit a
brother who worked fourteen or even sixteen hours a day
at his trade, the necessary result of which was, that not
only his body suffered, but his soul was lean, and he had
no enjoyment in God. I might point out to him that he
ought to work less, in order that his bodily health might
not suffer, and that he might gather strength for his inner
man, by reading the word of God, by meditation over it,
and by prayer. The reply, however, I generally found to
be something like this : " But if I work less, I do not earn
enough for the support of my family. Even now, whilst I
work so much, I have scarcely enough." There was no
trust in God, no real belief in the truth of that word,
" Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness,
and all these things shall be added unto you." I might
reply something like this : " My dear brother, it is not your
work which supports your family, but the Lord ; and he who
has fed you and your family when you could not work at
all, on account of illness, would surely provide for you and
yours, if, for the sake of obtaining food for your inner man,
you were to work only for so many hours a day as would
allow you proper time for retirement. And is it not the
case now that you begin the work of the day after having
had only a few hurried moments for prayer ; and when you
leave off your work in the evening, and mean then to read
a little of the word of God, are you not too much worn
out in body and mind to enjoy it, and do you not often
1835. HOME FOB DESTITUTE ORPHANS. 113
fall asleep whilst reading the Scriptures, or whilst on your
knees in prayer ? " The brother would allow it was so ;
he would allow that my advice was good ; but still I read
in his countenance, even if he should not have actually
said so, " How should I get on if I were to carry out your
advice ? " I longed, therefore, to have something to point
the brother to, as a visible proof that our God and Father
is the same faithful God that he ever was, — as willing as
ever to PROVE himself the LIVING GOD, in our day as for-
merly, to all who put their trust in him.
Again, sometimes I found children of God tried in mind
by the prospect of old age, when they might be unable to
work any longer, and therefore were harassed by the fear
of having to go into the poorhouse. If in such a case I
pointed out to them how their heavenly Father has always
helped those who put their trust in him, they might not
say that times have changed ; but yet it was evident
enough that God was not looked upon by them as the
LIVING God. I longed to set something before the chil-
dren of God whereby they might see that he does not for-
sake, even in our day, those who rely upon him.
Another class of persons were brethren in business, who
suffered in their souls, and brought guilt on their con-
sciences, by carrying on their business almost in the same
way as unconverted persons do. The competition in trade,
the bad times, the over-peopled country, were given asr
reasons why, if the business were carried on simply accord-
ing to the word of God, it could not be expected to do
well. Such a brother, perhaps, would express the wish
that he might be differently situated, but very rarely did 1
see that there was a stand made for God, that there icas the
holy determination to trust in the living God, and to de-
pend on him, in order that a good conscience might be
maintained. To this class, likewise, I desired to show by a
visible proof that God is unchangeably the same.
10*
114 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. "Vn
Then there was another class of persons, individuals
who were in professions in which they could not continue
with a good conscience, or persons who were in an unscrip-
tural position with reference to spiritual things ; \>ut both
classes feared, on account of the consequences, to give up
the profession in which they could not abide with God, or
to leave their position, lest they should be thrown out of
employment. My spirit longed to be instrumental in
strengthening their faith, by giving them not only instances
from the word of God of his willingness and ability to help
all those who rely upon him, but to show them by proofs
that he is the same in our day. I well knew that the word
of God ought to be enough; but I considered that I ought
to lend a helping hand to my brethren,- if by any means,
by this visible proof to the unchangeable faithfulness of
the Lord, I might strengthen their hands in God ; for I
remembered what a great blessing my own soul had
received through the Lord's dealings with his servant A.
H. Franke, who, in dependence upon the living God alone,
established an immense orphan house, which I had seen
many times with my own eyes. I therefore judged my-
self bound to be the servant of the church of Christ in
the particular point on which I had obtained mercy;
namely, in being able to ta7ce God by his word, and to rely
upon it.
All these exercises of my soul, which resulted from the
fact that so many believers with whom I became ac-
quainted were harassed and distressed in mind, or brought
guilt on their consciences on account of not trusting in
the Lord, were used by God to awaken in my heart the
desire of setting before the church at large, and before the
world, a proof that he has not in the least changed ; and
this seemed to me best clone by the establishing of an
orphan house. It needed to be something which- could be
seen, even by the natural eye. Now, if I, a poor man,
1335. HOME FOE DESTITUTE ORPHANS. 115
simply by prayer and faith, obtained, without asldng any
individual^ the means for establishing and carrying on an
orphan house, there would be something which, with the
Lord's blessing, might be instrumental in strengthening the
faith of the children of God, besides being a testimony to
the consciences of the unconverted of the reality of the
things of God.
This, then, was the primary reason for establishing the
orphan house. I certainly did from my heart desire to be
used by God to benefit the bodies of poor children, be-
reaved of both parents, and seek in other respects, with
the help of God, to do them good for this life. I also par-
ticularly longed to be used by God in getting the dear
orphans trained up in the fear of God ; but still, the first
and primary object of the work was, and still is, that
God might be magnified by the fact that the orphans under
my care are provided with all they need, only by prayer
and faith, without any one being asked by me or my
fellow-laborers, whereby it may be seen that God is FAITH-
FUL STILL, and HEARS PRAYER STILL. That I was not
mistaken, has been abundantly proved since November,
1835, both by the Conversion of many sinners who have
read the accounts which have been published in connec-
tion with this work, and also by the abundance of fruit
that has followed in the hearts of the saints, for which,
from my inmost soul, I desire to be grateful to God, and
the honor and glory of which not only is due to him alone,
but which I, by his help, am enabled to ascribe to him.
November 28. I have been, every day this week, very
much in prayer concerning the orphan house, chiefly en-
treating the Lord to take away every thought concerning
it out of my mind if the matter be not of him ; and have
also repeatedly examined my heart concerning my motives
in the matter. But I have been more and more confirmed
that it is of God.
116 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. TO.
December 2. I have again these last days prayed much
about the orphan house, and have frequently examined my
heart, that if it were at all my desire to establish it for the
sake of gratifying myself I might find it out. To that
end I have also conversed with brother Craik about it,
that he might be instrumental in showing me any hidden
corruption of my heart concerning the matter, or any
other scriptural reason against my engaging in it. The
one only reason which ever made me at all doubt as to ita
being of God that I should engage in this work, is the
multiplicity of engagements which I have already. But
if the matter be of God, he will in due time send suitable
individuals, so that comparatively little of my time will be
taken up in this service.
This morning I asked the Lord especially that he would
be pleased to teach me through the instrumentality of
brother C. ; and I went to him, that he might have an
opportunity of probing my heart. For as I desire only
the Lord's glory, I should be glad to be instructed through
the instrumentality of any brother, if the matter be not of
him. But brother C., on the contrary, greatly encour-
aged me in it. Therefore, I have this day taken the first
actual step in the matter, in having ordered bills to be
printed, announcing a public meeting on December 9, at
which I intend to lay before the brethren my thoughts
concerning the orphan house, as a means of ascertaining
more clearly the Lord's mind concerning the matter. De-
cember 5. This evening I was struck, in reading the
Scriptures, with these words : " Open thy mouth wide, and
I will fill it." I was led to apply this Scripture to the
orphan house, and asked the Lord for premises, one thou-
sand pounds, and suitable individuals to take care of the
children. December 7. To-day I received the first shil-
ling for the orphan house.
December 9. This afternoon the first piece of furniture
1835. HOME FOB DESTITUTE ORPHANS. 117
was given, — a large wardrobe. This afternoon and even-
ing I was low in spirit as it regards the orphan house, but
as soon as I began to speak at the meeting I received
peculiar assistance from God. After the meeting, ten shil-
lings was given to me. There was purposely no collection,
nor did any one speak besides myself; for it was not in the
least intended to work upon the feelings, for I sought to
be quite sure concerning the mind of God. After the
meeting, a sister offered herself for the work. I went home,
happy in the Lord, and full of confidence that the matter
will come to pass, though but ten shillings has been
given. December 10. I have sent to the press a statement,
which contains the substance of what I said at the meet-
ing last evening. I have received a letter, in which a
brother and sister wrote thus : " We propose ourselves for
the service of the intended orphan house, if you think us
qualified for it ; also to give up all the furniture, etc., which
the Lord has given us, for its use ; and to do this without
receiving any salary whatever, believing that if it be the
will of the Lord to employ us, he will supply all our need,"
etc. In the evening a brother brought, from several indi-
viduals, three dishes, twenty-eight plates, three basins, one
jug, four mugs, three salt-stands, one grater, four knives,
and five forks.
December 12. While I was praying this morning that
the Lord would give us a fresh token of his favor concern-
ing the orphan house, a brother brought three dishes,
twelve plates, one basin, and one blanket. After this had
been given, I thanked God, and asked him to give even
this day another encouragement. Shortly after, fifty
pounds was given, and that by an individual from whom,
for several reasons, I could not have expected this sum.
Thus the hand of God appeared so much the more clearly.
Even then I was led to pray that this day the Lord would
give still more. In the evening, accordingly, there was
118 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. VU
Bent, by a sister, twenty-nine yards of print. Also a sister
offered herself for the work. December 13. A brother
was influenced this day to give four shillings p?r week, as
long as the Lord gives the means: eight shillings was
given by him as two weeks' subscription. To-day a brother
and sister offered themselves, with all their furniture, and
all their provisions which they have in the house, if they
can be usefully employed in the concerns of the orphan
house.
December 14. To-day a sister offered her services for
the work. In the evening another sister offered herself
for the institution. December 15. A sister brought, from
several friends, ten basins, eight mugs, one plate, five des-
sert spoons, six teaspoons, one skimmer, one toasting-fork,
one flour-dredge, three knives and forks, one sheet, one
pillow-case, one table-cloth; also one pound. In the after-
noon were sent fifty-five yards of sheeting, and twelve
yards of calico. December 16. I took out of the box in
my room one shilling. December 17. I was rather cast
down last evening and this morning about the matter,
questioning whether I ought to be engaged in this way,
and was led to ask the Lord to give me some further en-
eouragement. Soon after were sent by a brother two
pieces of print, the one seven and the other twenty-three
and three fourths yards, six and three fourths yards of calico,
four pieces of lining, about four yards altogether, a sheet,
and a yard measure. This evening another brother brought
a quantity of household articles, and told me that it had
been put into the heart of an individual to send to-mor-
row one hundred pounds.
December 18. This afternoon the same brother brought,
from a sister, a counterpane, a flatiron-stand, eight cups
and saucers, a sugar-basin, a milk jug, a teacup, sixteen
thimbles, five knives and forks, six dessert-spoons, twelve
teaspoons, four combs, and two little graters ; from another
J835. HOME FOR DESTITUTE OKPHANS. 119
friend a. flatiron, and a cup and saucer. At the same
time he brought the hundred pounds above referred
to. Since the publication of the second edition, it has
pleased the Lord to take to himself the donor of this
hundred pounds, and I therefore give, in this present
edition, some further account of the donation and the
donor.
A. L. was known to me almost from the beginning of
my coining to Bristol, in 1832. She earned her bread by
needle-work, by which she gained from two shillings to
five shillings per week ;. the average, I suppose, was not
more than three shillings sixpence, as she was weak in
body. But I do not remember ever to have heard her
utter a word of complaint on account of earning so little.
Some time before I had been led to establish an orphan
house, her father had died, through which event she had
come in possession of four hundred and eighty pounds,
which sum had been left to her (and the same amount to
her brother and two sisters) by her grandmother, but o*
which her father had had the interest during his lifetime
The father, who had been much given to drinking, died in
debt, which debts the children wished to pay; but the rest*
besides A. L., did not like to pay in full, and offered tc
the creditors twenty-five per cent., which they gladly
accepted, as they had not the least legal claim upon th?
children. After the debts had been paid according to thu*
agreement, sister A. L. said to herself, " However sinful
my father may have been, yet he was my father, and as I
have the means of paying his debts to the full amount, I
ought, as a believing child, to do so, seeing that my brother
and sisters will not do it." She then went to all the cred-
itors secretly, and paid the full amount of the debts, which
took forty pounds more of he** money, besides her share,
which she had given before. Her brother and two sisters
now gave fifty pounds each of their property to their
120 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VIi
mother ; but A. L. said to herself, " I am a child of God;
surely I ought to give my mother twice as much as my
brothers and sisters." She therefore gave her mother one
hundred pounds. Shortly after this she sent me the
hundred pounds towards the orphan house. I was not a
little surprised when I received this money from her, for I
had always known her as a poor girl, and I had never
heard anything about her having come into the possession of
this money, and her dress had never given me the least
indication of an alteration in her circumstances. Before,
however, accepting this money from her, I had a long con-
versation with her, in which I sought to probe her as to her
motives, and in which I sought to ascertain whether, as I had
feared, she might have given this money in the feeling of
the moment, without having counted the cost. But I had
not conversed long with this beloved sister, before I found
that she was, in this particular, a quiet, calm, considerate
follower of the Lord Jesus, and one who desired, in spite
of what human reason might say, to act according to the
words of our Lord, " Lay not up for yourselves treasures
upon earth." " Sell that ye have, and give alms." When
I remonstrated with her, in order that I might see whether
she had counted the cost, she said to me, "The Lord
Jesus has given his last drop of blood for me, and should I
not give him this hundred pounds?" She would also
have me take five pounds for the poor saints in commun-
ion with us. I mention here particularly that this dear
sister kept all these things to herself, and did them as much
as possible in secret ; and during her lifetime, I suppose,
not six brethren and sisters among us knew that she had
ever possessed four hundred and eighty pounds, or that
she had given one hundred pounds towards the orphan
house.
I relate one instance more. August 4, 1836, seven
months and a half after she had given the hundred
1835. HOME FOR DESTITUTE ORPHANS. 121
pounds, she came one morning to me, and said : " Last
evening I felt myself particularly stirred up to pray about
the funds of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution ; but
whilst praying, I thought, what good is it for me to pray
for means, if I do not give when I have the means, and I
have therefore brought you this five pounds." As I had
reason to believe that, by this time, by far the greater part
of her money was gone, I again had a good deal of con-
versation with her, to see whether she really did count the
cost, and whether this donation also was given unto the
Lord, or from momentary excitement, in which case it was
better not to give the money. However, she was at this
time also steadfast, grounded upon the word of God, and
evidently constrained by the love of Christ ; and all the
effect my conversation had upon her was, that she said,
"You must take five shillings in addition to the five
pounds, as a proof that I give the five pounds cheerfully."
And thus she constrained me to take the five pounds and
five shillings. — Four things are especially to be noticed
about this beloved sister, with reference to all this period
of her earthly pilgrimage : 1. She did all these things in
secret, avoiding to the utmost all show about them, and
thus proved that she did not desire the praise of man. 2.
She remained, as before, of an humble and lowly mind/and
she proved thus that she had done what she did unto the
Lord, and not unto man. 3. Her dress remained, during
all the time that she had this comparative abundance, the
same as before. It was clean, yet as simple and as inexpen-
sive as it was at the time when all her income consisted
of three shillings and sixpence, or at most five shillings
per week. There was not the least difference as to her
lodging, dress, manner of life, etc. She remained in every
way the poor handmaid of the Lord, as to all outward ap-
pearance. 4. But that which is as lovely as the rest, she
continued working at her needle all this time. She earned
11
122 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VII.
her two shillings- sixpence, or three shillings, or a little
more, a week, by her work, as before ; whilst she gave
away the money in sovereigns or five-pound notes. At
last all her money was gone, and that some years before
she fell asleep ; and as her bodily health never had been
good as long as I had known her, and was now much
worse, she found herself peculiarly dependent upon the
Lord, who never forsook her, up to the last moments of
her earthly course. Her body became weaker and weaker,
in consequence of which she was able to work very little,
for many months before she died ; but the Lord supplied
her with all she needed, though she never asked for any-
thing. For instance, a sister in communion with us sent
her, for many months, all the bread she used. Her
mouth was full of thanksgiving, even in the midst of the
greatest bodily sufferings.
December 20. A sister gave five pounds. December
21. A friend sent one pound. "Weekly subscription of
four shillings. December 22. A sister gave me one pound,
and a friend sent two shillings and sixpence. December
23. A brother gave, this evening, a piece of blind line
and a dozen of blind tassels. About ten in the evening, a
gentleman brought me from an individual, whose name he
was not to mention, four pounds, of wm'ch I was allowed
to take two pounds for the orphan house, and to give the
other two pounds to poor believers. December 31. This
evening we had a special meeting for prayer and praise.
There have been received into the church, during the past
year, 59. There are men in communion with us, 95. I
have received for my temporal wants, in freewill offerings,
presents, etc., £285 Is. lid.
During January to May of 1836, numerous donations
were made of furniture, provisions, half vorn cloth-
1836. HOME FOR DESTITUTE ORPHANS. 123
ing, and money (varying from one hundred pounds
to a halfpenny). Encouraged by these unsolicited
offerings, Mr. Miiller determined to open the Orphan
House.
April 21. This day was set apart for prayer and thanks-
giving concerning the Orphan House, as it is now opened.
In the morning, several brethren prayed, and brother Craik
spoke on the last verses of Psalm xx. In the afternoon, I
addressed our day and Sunday school children, the or-
phans, and other children present. In the evening we had
another prayer meeting. There are now seventeen children
in the Orphan House.
May 6. I have now been for some years, and especially
these last few months, more or less thinking and praying
respecting publishing a short account of the Lord's dealings
with me. To-day I have at last settled to do so, and have
begun to write.
May 16. For these several weeks our income has been
little ; and though I had prayed many times that the Lord
would enable us to put by the taxes, yet the prayer
remained unanswered. In the midst of it all, my comfort
was, that the Lord would send help by the time it would
be needed. One thing particularly has been a trial to us
of late, far more than our own temporal circumstances,
which is, that we have scarcely, in any measure, been able
to relieve the distress among the poor saints. To-day,
the Lord, at last, after I had many times prayed to him
for these weeks past, answered my prayers, there being
seven pounds twelve shillings and one farthing given to
me as my part of the freewill offerings through the boxes, —
two five-pound notes having been put in yesterday, one
tor brother Craik and one for me. Thus the Lord has
again delivered us, and answered our prayers, and that not
124 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. Vll
one single hour too late ; for the taxes have not as yet been
called for. May he fill my heart with gratitude for this
fresh deliverance, and may he be pleased to enable me
more and more to trust in him, and to wait patiently for
his help !
CHAPTER VIII.
THE FIELD WIDENING.
1836 — 1837.
AS UNEXPECTED OBSTACLE — IMPLICIT SUBMISSION — A SECOND ORPHAN
HOUSE PROPOSED — AN ENCOURAGING TEXT — THE NEW ORPHAN HOUSE
OPENED — COMPLETED ANSWER TO PRAYER — PROGRESS OP THE LORD'S
WORK — THE OVERSIGHT OF THE FLOCK.
Under date of May 18, 1836, Mr. M. says : —
IN the foregoing pages, a statement has been given of
the success with which the Lord has been pleased to crown
the prayers of his servant respecting the establishment ojf
an Orphan House in this city. The subject of my prayer
was, that he would graciously provide a house, either as a
loan or as a gift, or that some one might be led to pay the
rant for one ; further, that he would give me one thousand
pounds for the object, and likewise suitable individuals to
take care of the children. A day or two after, I was led to
ask, in addition to the above, that he would put it into the
hearts of his people to send me articles of furniture, and
some clothes for the children. In answer to these petitions,
many articles of furniture, clothing, and food were sent, a
conditional offer of a house, as a gift, was made, individuals
proposed themselves to take care of the children, and vari-
ous sums of money were given, varying from one hundred
pounds to a halfpenny.
11*
126 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VUL
It may be well to state that the above results have fol-
lowed in answer to prayer, without any one having been
asked by me for one single thing ; from which I have re-
frained, not on account of want of confidence in the
brethren, or because I doubted their love to the Lord, but
that I might see the hand of God so much the more
clearly.
So far as I remember, I brought even the most minute
circumstances concerning the Orphan House before the
Lord in my petitions, being conscious of my own weakness
and ignorance. There was, however, one point I never
had prayed about, namely, that the Lord would send chil-
dren ; for I naturally took it for granted that there would
be plenty of applications. The appointed time came, and
not even one application was made. This circumstance
now led me to lie low before my God in prayer, and to ex-
amine my heart once more as to all the motives concerning
it ; and being able, as formerly, to say, that his glory was
my chief aim, i. e. that it might be seen that it is not a
vain thing to trust in the living God, and still continuing
in prayer, I was at last brought to this state, that I could
say from my heart that I should rejoice in God being
glorified in this matter, though it were by bringing the
whole to nothing. But as still, after all, it seemed to me
more tending to the glory of God to establish and prosper
the Orphan House, I could then ask him heartily to send
applications. I enjoyed now a peaceful state of heart
concerning the subject, and was also more assured than ever
that God would establish it. The very next day the first
application was made, and within a short time forty-three
applied. I rented the house No. 6, Wilson Street, as being,
on account of its cheapness and largeness, very suitable.
I have mentioned that we intended to take in the chil-
dren from the seventh to the twelfth year. But after six
applications hud been made for children between four and
1836. THE FIELD WIDENING. 127
six years of age, it became a subject of solemn and prayer-
ful consideration, whether, as long as there were vacancies,
such children should not be received, though so young. I
came at last to the conclusion to take in the little girls
under seven years of age, for whom application had been
made. Further, it has been repeatedly brought before me,
how desirable it would be to .establish also, in this city, an
Orphan House for male children, and there were even articles
sent for little orphan boys. Partly, then, on account of
these reasons ; and partly because the Institution already
opened was quite filled in a few days ; and partly because
the Lord has done hitherto far above what I could have
expected ; I have at last, after repeated prayer, come to the
conclusion, in the name of the Lord, and in dependence
upon him alone for support, to propose the establishment
of an Infant Orphan House.
June 3. From May 16 up to this day I have been con-
fined to the house, and a part of the time to my bed, on
account of a local inflammation, which keeps me from
walking. Almost every day during this time I have been
able to continue writing a narrative of the Lord's dealings
with me, which had been again laid aside after May^^*on
account of a number of pressing engagements. It is very
remarkable that the greatest objection against writing it
for the press was want of time. Now, through this afflic-
tion, which leaves my mind free, and gives me time, on
account of confinement to the house, I have been able to
write about a hundred quarto pages.
June 14. This morning brother C r and I prayed
unitedly, chiefly about the schools and the circulation of
the Scriptures. Besides asking for blessings upon the
work, we have also asked the Lord for the means which are
needed ; for on July 1, seventeen pounds ten shillings will
be due for the rent of school-rooms, and, besides this, we
want at least forty pounds more to go on with the circu-
128 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. VIII,
lation of the Scriptures, to pay the salaries of the masters,
etc. Towards all this we have only about seven pounds.
I also prayed for the remainder of the thousand pounds for
the Orphan House.
June 21. This evening brother C r and I found that
the Lord has not only been pleased to send us, through the
offerings which have come jn during the last week, in
answer to our prayers, the seventeen pounds ten shillings
which will be due for the rent of two school-rooms on July
1, but that we have five pounds more than is needed.
Thus the Lord once more has answered our prayers.
July 28. For some weeks past we have not been able
to pay the salary of the masters and governesses a month
in advance, but have been obliged to pay it weekly.
Brother C r and I have lately prayed repeatedly to-
gether respecting the funds, but we were now brought so
low, that we should not have been able to pay even this
weekly salary of the teachers, had not the Lord most
remarkably helped us again to-day. For, besides one
pound, which was given to us, this evening a brother
ga#& *iight pounds, which sum had been made up by a
number of his workmen paying weekly one penny each, of
their own accord, towards our funds. The money had
been collecting for many months, and, in this our necessity,
it had been put into the heart of this brother to bring it.
July 29. This evening, from six to half past nine, we
had a meeting for inquirers. There came twelve fresh
cases before us.
October 1. To-day, in dependence upon the Lord alone
for means, we engaged a brother as a master for a sixth
day school. On account of the many deliverances which
we have had of late, we have not hesitated to enlarge the
field, as another boys' school was greatly needed.
October 5. This evening twenty-five pounds was given
to me for the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. Thus the
1836. THE FIELD WIDENING. 129
Lord has already given the means of defraying the ex-
penses of the new boys' school for some months to come.
October 19. To-day, after having many times prayed
respecting the matter, I have at last engaged a sister as
matron for the Infant Orphan House, never having been
able, up to this day, to meet with an individual who
seemed suitable, though there has been money enough in
hand, for some time past, for commencing this work, and
there have been applications made for several infant orphans.
October 25. To-day we obtained, without any trouble,
through the kind hand of God, very suitable premises for
the Infant Orphan House.
November 5. There was given by a brx ther one hun-
dred pounds, fifty pounds of which was previously promised,
to insure the rent for premises. It is a remarkable fact,
concerning this donation, that I had, in December of last
year, repeatedly asked the Lord to incline the heart of
this brother to give this hundred pounds, and I made
a memorandum of this prayer in my journal of December
12, 1835. On January 25, 1836, fifty pounds was promised
by him, and on November 5, fifty pounds besides that
sum was given ; but it was not till some days after, that
I remembered that the very sum for which I had asked
the Lord had been given. When it came to my mind that
this prayer had been noted down in my journal, and I
showed it to the donor, we rejoiced together ; he, to have
been the instrument in giving, and I to have had the
request granted.
November 30. On account of many pressing engage-
ments, I had not been led, for some time past, to pray
respecting the funds. But being in great need^ I was led,
yesterday morning, earnestly to ask the Lord ; and in an-
swer to this petition a brother gave me, last evening, ten
pounds. He had had it in his heart, for several months
past, to give this sum, but had been hitherto kept from iu
130 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VIII.
not having the means. Just now, in this our great neces-
sity, the Lord furnished him with the means, and we were
helped in this way. In addition to this ten pounds, I
received last evening a letter with five pounds, from a
sister whom I never saw, and who has been several times
used by God as an instrument to supply our wants. She
writes thus : u It has been so much on my mind lately to
send you some money, that I feel as if there must be some
need, which the Lord purposes to honor me by making me
the instrument of Supplying. I therefore enclose you five
pounds, all I have in the house at this moment."
December 9. One pound, with Mark ix. 36-7 : " And
taking a little child, he set him in the midst of them,"
etc., a most encouraging passage for this work, the force
of which I had never felt before.
December 15. This day was set apart for prayer and
thanksgiving respecting the Infant Orphan House, which
was opened on November 28. In the morning we had a
prayer meeting. In the afternoon, besides prayer and
thanksgiving, I addressed the children of our day schools
and the orphans, about 350, on Ecclesiastes xii. 1.
In addition to the items mentioned above, donations
were received during the year, of money, food, clothes,
books, boxes, coal-hods, ornaments (to be sold), etc. j
also, the offer of gratuitous medical attendance, and
medicine. Up to the close of 1836, seven hundred and
seventy pounds and ninepence halfpenny had been
given, and forty pounds promised.
December 31. We had this evening a prayer meeting
to praise the Lord for his goodness during the past year,
and to ask him for a continuance of his favors,
1837. THE FIELD WIDENING. 13l
During the past year there have been received into the
church, 52 ; and the Lord has been pleased to give me,
as it regards my temporal supplies, £232 11s. 9d.
January 2, 1837. This evening the two churches had
again an especial prayer meeting.
January 5. To-day a sister called and told me about
the conversion of her father, who, in his eightieth yeat.
after having for many years lived openly in sin, is at last
brought to the knowledge of the Lord. This sister had
long prayed for the conversion of her father, and at last,
though only after twenty years, the Lord gave her the
desire of her heart.
May 18. There are now sixty-four children in the two
Orphan Houses, and two more are expected, which will fill
the two houses.
May 28. The narrative of some of the Lord's dealings
with me is now near being published, which has led me
again most earnestly this day week, and repeatedly since,
to ask the Lord that he would be pleased to give me what
is wanting of the one thousand pounds, for which sum I
have asked him on behalf of the orphans ; for though, in
my own mind, the thing is as good as done, so much
so that I have repeatedly been able to thank God that he
will surely give me every shilling of that sum, yet to-
others this would not be enough. As the whole matter,
then, about the Orphan House had been commenced for the
glory of God, that in this way before the world and the
church there might be another visible proof that the Lord
delights in answering prayer ; and as there was yet a part
of the thousand pounds wanting; and as I earnestly
desired the book might not leave the press before every
shilling of that sum had been given in answer to prayer,
without one single individual having been asked by me for
anything^ that thus I might have the sweet privilege of
bearing my testimony for God in this book ; — for these
132 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VIII
reasons, I say, I have given myself earnestly to prayer
about this matter since May 21. On May 22 came in
seven pounds and ten shillings, and on May 23, three
pounds. On May 24, a lady, whom I never saw before,
called on me, and gave me forty pounds. This circum-
stance has greatly encouraged me ; for the Lord showed
me thereby, afresh, his willingness to continue to send us
large sums, and that they can even come from individuals
whom we have never seen before. On May 25, three
pounds and six shillings were sent from two unexpected
quarters. On May 27 was sent, anonymously, a parcel of
worn clothes, from London, and a sovereign. To-day
(May 28) I received again four pounds three shillings and
sixpence ; and also a parcel was sent from a considerable
distance, containing seven pairs of socks, and the following
trinl^ts, to be sold for the support of the orphans : one
gold pin with an Irish pearl, fifteen Irish pearls, two
pins, two brooches, two lockets, one seal, two studs, eleven
rings, oixe chain, and one bracelet, all of gold.
June 15. To-day I gave myself once more earnestly
to prayer respecting the remainder of the thousand
pounds. This evening five pounds were given, so that now
the whole sum is made up. During eighteen months and
ten days this petition has been brought before God almost
daily. From the moment I asked till the Lord granted, it
fully, I had never been allowed to doubt that he would
give every shilling of that sum. Often have I praised him
beforehand, in the assurance that he would grant my
request. The thing after which we have especially to seek
in prayer is, that we believe that we receive, according to
Mark xi. 24 : " What things soever ye desire, when ye pray,
believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them"
As the Lord has so greatly condescended to listen to my
prayers, and as I consider it one of the particular talents
which he has intrusted to me to exercise faith upon his
1837. THE FIELD WIDENING. 133
promises, as it regards my own temporal wants and those
of others ; and as an Orphan House for boys above seven
years of age seems greatly needed in this city ; and as
also without it we know not how to provide for the little
'boys in the Infant Orphan House, when they are above
seven years of age, I purpose to establish an Orphan
House for about forty boys above seven years of age.
July 12. The same friend who gave me on May 24,
1837, forty pounds for the orphans, and whom, up to that
time, I had never seen, gave four hundred and sixty
pounds more, being altogether five hundred pounds.
It is now three years and four months since brother
Craik and I began, in dependence upon the Lord for funds,
lo seek to help the spread of the gospel through the instru-
mentality of schools, the circulation of the Holy Scrip-
tures, and by aiding missionary exertions. Since then
there have been circulated, through our instrumentality,
4,030 copies of the Scriptures ; four day schools, for poor
children, have been established by us ; 1,119 children have
been instructed in the six day schools, and 353 children
are now in those six clay schools. Besides this, a Sunday
school and an adult school have been supplied with all
they needed, and missionary exertions in the East Indies,
in Upper Canada, and on the continent of Europe, have
been aided. In addition to this, the word of God has been
preached from house to house among the poor, in connec-
tion with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution, by brother
C r, within the last two years.
On the 15th of August, 1837, the preceding portion
of this narrative was published.
Aug. 17. To-day two more children were received into
the Infant Orphan House, which makes up our full num-
ber, sixty-six in the Girls' and Infant Orphan Houses.
b
134 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. VIII.
S jptember 2. I have been looking about for a house foi
the orphan boys, these last three days. Everything else has
been provided. The Lord has given suitable individuals
to take care of the children, money, etc. In his own time
lie will give a house also.
September 19. It was to-day particularly impressed
upon my heart that I ought to seek for more retirement,
though the work should apparently suffer ever so much ;
and that arrangements should be made whereby I may be
able to visit the brethren more, as an unvisited church will
sooner or later become an unhealthy church. Pastors, as
fellow-laborers, are greatly needed among us.
September 28. I have for a long time been too much
outwardly engaged. Yesterday morning I spent about
three hours in the vestry of Gideon, to be able to have
more time for retirement. I meant to do the same in the
afternoon, but before I could leave the house I was called
on, and thus one person after the other came, till I had to
go out. Thus it has been again to-day.
October 16. For a long time past brother Craik and I
have felt the importance of more pastoral visiting, and it
has been one of our greatest trials that we have been
unable to give more time to it. This evening we had pur-
posely a meeting of the two churches, at which brother
Craik and I, and a brother from Devonshire, spoke on : 1.
The importance of pastoral visiting. II. The particular
obstacles which hindered us in attending to it. III. The
question whether there was any way of removing some of
the obstacles.
I. As to the importance of pastoral visiting, the follow-
ing points were mentioned : 1. Watching over the saints,
by means of visiting them, to prevent coldness, or to re-
cover them from backsliding. 2. To counsel and advise
them in family affairs, in their business, and in spiritual
matters. 3. To keep up that loving and familiar inter
1837. THE FIELD WIDENING. 135
course which is so desirable between saints and those who
have the oversight of them. These visits should be, if
possible, frequent ; but in our case there have been several
obstacles in the way.
II. The particular obstacles in our case are: 1. The
largeness of the number who are in communion with us.
One hundred would be quite as many as we have strength
to visit regularly, and as often as would be desirable ; but
there are nearly four hundred in fellowship with us. 2.
The distance of the houses of the saints from our own
dwellings, as many live more than two miles off. 3. The
Lord's blessing upon our labors. Not one year has passed
away, since we have been in Bristol, without more than
fifty having been added to our number, each of whom, in
general, needed several times to be conversed with before
being admitted into fellowship. 4. That brother Craik
and I have each of us the care of two churches. At the
first sight it appears as if the work is thus divided, but the
double number of meetings, etc., nearly double the work.
5. The mere ruling, and taking care, in general, of a large
body of believers, irrespective of the other work, takes
much more time, and requires much more strength, than
the taking care of a small body of believers, as we, by
grace, desire not to allow known sin among us. 6. The
position which we have in the church at large brings
many brethren to us who travel through Bristol, who call
on us, or lodge with us, and to whom, according to the
Lord's will, we have to give some time. 7. In my own
case, an extensive needful correspondence. 8. The weak-
ness of body on the part of both of us. When the
preaching is done, — when strangers who lodge with us
are gone, — when the calls at our house are over, — when
the needful letters, however briefly, are written, — when
the necessary church business is settled, — our minds are
often so worn out that we are glad to be quiet. 9. But
136 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. VIII
suppose we have bodily strength remaining, after the
above things have been attended to, yet the frame of mind
is not always so as that one could visit. After having
been particularly tried by church matters, which in so
large a body does not rarely occur, or being cast down in
one's own soul, one may be fit for the closet, but not for
visiting the saints. 10. Lastly, in my own case, no small
part of my time is taken up by attending to the affairs of
the Orphan Houses, schools, the circulation of the Scrip-
tures, the aiding missionary efforts, and other work con-
nected with the Scriptural Knowledge Institution.
III. What is to be done under these circumstances?
1. In the days of the apostles there would have been more
brethren to take the oversight of so large a body as we
are. The Lord has not laid upon us a burden which is too
heavy for us ; he is not a hard master. It is evident that
he does not mean us even to attempt to visit all the saints
as much as is evidently needful, and much less as fre-
quently as it would be desirable. We mention this, to
prevent uncomfortable feelings on the part of the dear
saints under our pastoral care, who find themselves not as
much visited as they used to be when we came to Bristol,
when the number of them, was not seventy, and now it is
about four hundred, and when in many other respects the
work in our hands was not half so much as it is now, and
when we had much more bodily strength. 2. It is there-
fore evident that there are other pastors needed; not nom-
inal pastors, but such as the Lord has called, to whom he
has given a pastor's heart and pastoral gifts. 3. Such
may be raised up by the Lord from our own number, or
the Lord may send them from elsewhere. 4. But in the
mean time we should at least see whether there are not
helpers among us. 5. As to the work itself, in order that
time may be saved, it appears desirable that the two
churches, Bcthesda and Gideon, should be united into one,
1830. THE FIELD WIDENING. 137
that the breaking of bread should be alten lately, and that
the number of weekly meetings should be reduced.
October 21. To-day the Lord has given me a house for
the Orphan Boys, in the same street in which the other
two Orphan Houses are.
Mr. Miiller's health having suffered from his cares,
money was sent him from unexpected sources, to be
used in travelling and recreation.
REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1837.
1. There are now eighty-one children in the three Orphan
Houses, and nine brethren and sisters, who have the care
of them. Ninety, therefore, daily sit down to table. Lord,
look on the necessities of thy servant !
2. The schools require as much help as before ; nay,
more, particularly the Sunday school, in which there are
at present about 320 children, and in the clay schools
about 350. Lord, thy servant is a poor man ; but he has
trusted in thee, and made his boast in thee, before the
sons of men ; therefore let him not be confounded ! Let
it not be said all this was enthusiasm, and therefore it is
come to naught !
3 My temporal supplies have been £307 2s. 6£d.
CHAPTER IX
TRIAL.
1838.
THE MINISTRY OF SICKNESS — PEACE OF MIND — JESUS A PRESENT HELP —
DEEP POVERTY — PLEADING WITH GOD — UNITED PRAYER.
JANUARY 6, 1838. I feel little better in my head, though
my general health seems improved ; but my kind physi-
cian says I am much better, and advises me now change of
air. This evening a sister, who resides about fifty miles
from hence, and who is quite unacquainted with the medi-
cal advice given to me this morning, sent me fifteen pounds
for the express purpose of change of air ; and wrote that
she felt assured, from having been similarly afflicted, that
nothing would do me so much good, humanly speaking, as
quiet and change of air.
January 7. This is the ninth Lord's day that I have
been kept from ministering in the word. My affliction is
connected with a great tendency to irritability of temper ;
yea, with some satanic feeling, foreign to me even natu-
rally.
January 10. To-day I went with my family to Trow-
bridge. Jan. 14. Lord's day. I have spent several hours in
prayer to-day, and read on my knees, and prayed for two
hours over Psalm Ixiii. God has blessed my soul much
to-day. My soul is now brought into that state that I
1838. TRIAL. 139
delight myself in the will of God, as it regards my health,
Yea, I can now say, /row my heart, I would not have this
disease removed till God, by its means, has bestowed the
blessing for which it was sent.
January 15. I have had, since yesterday afternoon, less
suffering in my head than for the last eight days ; though
it is even now far from being well. I have still an inward
assurance, on account of the spiritual blessings which the
Lord has granted to me, that through this affliction he is
only purifying me for his blessed service, and that I shall
be soon restored to the work. To-day, also, God has
continued to me fervency of spirit, which I have now
enjoyed for three days following. He has to-day, also,
drawn out my soul into much real communion with him-
self, and into holy desires to be more conformed to his
dear Son. When God gives a spirit of prayer, how easy
then to pray ! Nevertheless, it was given to me in the use
of the means, as I fell on my knees last Saturday, to read
his word with meditation, and to turn it into prayer. To-
day I spent about three hours in prayer over Psalms Ixiv.
and Ixv. In reference to that precious word, " O thou
that hearest prayer," (Ps. Ixv. 2,) I asked the Lord the
following petitions, and entreated him to record them in
heaven, and to answer them.
1. That he would give me grace to glorify him by a
Bubmissive and patient spirit under my affliction.
2. That as I ^as enabled now, and only now from my
heart, to praise God for this affliction, he would not
remove his hand from me until he had qualified me for hia
work more than I have been hitherto.
3. That he would be pleased to grant that the work of
conversion, through the instrumentality of brother Craik
and myself, might not cease, but go on as much now as
when we first came to Bristol, yea, more abundantly than
even then.
140 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IX.
4. That he would be pleased to give more real spiritual
prosperity to the church under our care than ever we have
as yet enjoyed.
5. Having praised him for the sale of so many copies of
my Narrative in so short a time, I entreated him to cause
every copy to be disposed of.
6. I asked him to continue to let his rich blessing rest
upon this little work, and more abundantly, so that many
may be converted through it, and many of the children of
God truly benefited by it, and that thus I might now be
speaking through it, though laid aside from active service.
7. I asked him for his blessing, in the way . of conver-
sion, to rest upon the orphans, and upon the Sunday and
day-school children under our care.
8. I asked him for means to carry on these Institutions,
and to enlarge them.
These are some of the petitions which I have asked of
my God this evening, in connection with this his own word.
I believe he has heard me. I believe he will make it
manifest in his own good time that he has heard me, and
) have recorded these my petitions, this 15th day of Jan-
uary, 1838, that when God has answered them he may get,
through this, glory to his name. [Whilst writing this
second part, I add to the praise of the Lord, and for the
encouragement of the children of Qod, that petitions 4, 5,
6, 7, and 8, have been/w% answered, and the other peti-
tions, likewise, in part.]
January 16. Tuesday. A blessed day. How very
good is the Lord ! Fervency of spirit, through his grace,
is continued to me ; though this morning, but for the help
of God, I should have lost it again. The weather has been
very cold for several days; but to-day I suffered much,
either because it was colder than before, or because I felt
it more, owing to the weakness of my body, and havin<*
taken so much medicine. I arose from my kne<->
1838. TEIAL. 141
stirred the fire, but I still remained very cold. I was
a little irritated by this. I moved to another part -of the
room, but felt the cold still more. At last, having prayed
for some time, I was obliged to rise up and take a walk
to promote circulation. I now entreated the Lord on my
walk that this circumstance might not be permitted to
rob me of the precious communion which I have had with
him the last three days ; for this was the object at which
Satan aimed. I confessed also my sin of irritability on
account of the cold, and sought to have my conscience
cleansed through the blood of Jesus. He had mercy upon
me, my peace was restored, and when I returned I sought
the Lord again in prayer, and had uninterrupted communion
with him.
His health remaining feeble, Mr. M. left England on
April 6, for Germany, and returned to Bristol May 7.
He continues his narrative : —
May 8. This evening I went to the prayer meeting at
Gideon. I read Psalm ciii., and was able to thank the
Lord publicly for my late affliction. This is the first time
that I have taken any part in the public meetings of the
brethren since November 6, 1837.
July 12. The funds, which were this day twelvemonth
about seven hundred and eighty pounds, are now reduced
to about twenty pounds ; but, thanks be to the Lord, my
faith is as strong, or stronger, than it was when we had the
larger sum in hand ; nor has he at any time, from the com-
mencement of the work, allowed me to distrust him.
Nevertheless, as our Lord will be inquired of, and as real
faith is manifested as such by leading to prayer, I gave
myself to prayer with brother T , of the Boys' Orphan
House, who had called on me, and who, besides my wife
ind brother Craik, is the only individual to whom I speak
142 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. DC
about the state of the funds. While we were praying, an
orphan child from Frome was brought, and some believers
at Frome, having collected among them five pounds, sent
this money with the child. Thus we received the first
answer at a time of need. We have given notice for seven
children to come in, and purpose to give notice for Jive
more, though our funds are so low^ hoping that God will
look on our necessities.
July 17 and 18. These two days we have had two
especial prayer meetings, from six to nine in the evening, to
commend publicly to the Lord the Boys' Orphan House.
Our funds are now very low. There are about twenty
pounds in hand, and in a few days thirty pounds, at least,
will be needed ; but I purposely avoided saying anything
about our present necessities, and spoke only to the praise of
God, about the abundance with which our gracious Father,
" the Father of the fatherless," has hitherto supplied us.
This was done in order that the hand of God, in sending
help, may be so much the more clearly seen.
July 22. This evening I was walking in our little
garden, meditating on Heb. xiii. 8, " Jesus Christ the same
yesterday, and to-day, and forever." Whilst meditating
on his unchangeable love, power, wisdom, etc., and turning
all, as I went on, into prayer respecting myself; and whilst
applying likewise his unchangeable love, and power, and
wisdom, etc., both to my present spiritual and temporal
circumstances, — all at once the present need of the
Orphan Houses was brought to my mind. Immediately I
was led to say to myself, Jesus in his love and power has
hitherto supplied me with what I have needed for the
orphans, and in the same unchangeable love and power he
will provide me with what I may need for the future. A
flow of joy came into my soul whilst realizing thus the
unchangeableness of our adorable Lord. About one minute
1838. TRIAL. 143
after, a letter was brought me, enclosing a bill for twenty
pounds.
August 18. I have not one penny in hand for the
orphans. In a day or two again many pounds will be
needed. My eyes are up to the Lord. Evening. Before
this day is over, I have received from a sister five pounds.
She had some time since put away her trinkets, to be sold
for the benefit of the orphans. This morning, whilst in
prayer, it came to her mind, " I have this five pounds, and
owe no man anything, therefore it would be better to give
this money at once, as it may be some time before I can
dispose of the trinkets." She therefore brought it, little
knowing that there was not a penny in hand.
August 29. To-day sixteen believers were baptized.
Among those who were baptized was an aged brother of
above eighty-four years, and one above seventy. For the
latter, his believing wife had prayed thirty-eight years, and
at last the Lord answered her prayers in his conversion.
August 31. I have been waiting on the Lord for means,
as the matron's books from the Girls' Orphan House have
been brought, and there is no money in hand to advance
for housekeeping. But, as yet, the Lord has not been
pleased to send help. As the matron called to-day for
money, one of the laborers gave two pounds of his own,
for the present necessities.
September 1. The Lord in his wisdom and love has not
yet sent help. Whence it is to come, need not be my care.
But I 'believe God will, in due time, send help. His hour
is not yet come. As there was money needed in the Boys'
Orphan House also, the same brother just alluded to gave
two pounds for that also. Thus we were delivered at this
time likewise. But now his means are gone. This is the
most trying hour that as yet I have had in the work, as it
regards means ; but I know that I shall yet praise the Lord
for his help.
144 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IX.
September 5. Our hour of trial continues still. The
Lord mercifully has given enough to supply our daily
necessities ; but he gives by the day now, and almost by
the hour, as we need it. Nothing came in yesterday. I
have besought the Lord again and again, both yesterday
and to-day. It is as if the Lord said : " Mine hour is not
yet come." But I have faith in God. I believe that he
surely will send help, though I know not whence it is to
come. Many pounds are needed within a few days, and
there is not a penny in hand. This morning two pounds
was given for the present necessities, by one of the laborers
in the work. Evening. This very day the Lord sent
again some help to encourage me to continue to wait on
him, and to trust in him. As I was praying this afternoon
respecting the matter, I felt fully assured that the Lord
would send help, and praised him beforehand for his help,
and asked him to encourage our hearts through it. I have
been also led, yesterday and to-day, to ask the Lord espe-
cially that he would not allow my faith to fail. A few
minutes after I had prayed, brother T came and
brought four pounds one shilling and fivepence, which had
come in in several small donations. He told me, at the
same time, that to-morrow the books will be brought from
the Infant Orphan House, when money must be advanced
for housekeeping. I thought for a moment it might be
well to keep three pounds of this money for that purpose.
But it occurred to me immediately, " Sufficient unto the
day is the evil thereof" The Lord can provide by to-
morrow much more than I need ; and I therefore sent three
pounds to one of the sisters whose quarterly salary was
due, and the remaining one pound one shilling and five-
pence to the Boys' Orphan House for housekeeping. Thus
I am still penniless. My hope is in God ; he will provide.
September 6. This morning the books were brought
from the Infant Orphan House, and the matron sent to
1838. TRIAL. 145
ask when she should fetch them, implying when they would
have been looked over, and when money would be ad-
vanced for housekeeping. I said, " to-morrow," though I
had not a single penny in hand. About an hour after,
brother T sent me a note, to say that he had received
one pound this morning, and that last evening a brother
had sent twenty-nine pounds of salt, forty-four dozen of
onions, and twenty-six pounds of groats.1
September 7. The time had come that I had to send
money to the Infant Orphan House, but the Lord had
not sent any more. I gave, therefore, the pound which
had come in yesterday, and two shillings and twopence
which had been put into the box in my house, trusting to
the good Lord to send in more.
September 8. It has not pleased my gracious Lord to
send me help as yet. Yesterday and to-day I have been
pleading with God eleven arguments why he would be gra^
ciously pleased to send help. The arguments which I
plead with God are : —
1. That I set about the work for the glory of God, i. e.
that there might be a visible proof, by God supplying, in
answer to prayer only, the necessities of the orphans, that
he is the living God, and most willing, even in our day, to
answer prayer; and that, therefore, he would be pleased to
send supplies.
2. That God is the "Father of the fatherless," and that
he, therefore, as their father, would be pleased to piovide.
Psalm Ixviii. 5.
3. That I have received the children in the name of
Jesus, and that therefore he, in these children, has been
received, and is fed, and is clothed ; and that therefore he
would be pleased to consider this. Mark ix. 36, 37.
-4. That the faith of many of the children of God haa
i Groate. Oats or other grain, vlth the hulls removed.— ED.
13
146 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IX.
been strengthened by this work hitherto, and thai, if God
were to withhold the means for the future, those who are
weak in faith would be staggered ; whilst, by a continuance,
of means, their faith might still further be strengthened.
5. That many enemies would laugh, were the Lord to
withhold supplies, and say. Did we not foretell that this
enthusiasm would come to nothing?
6. That many of the children of God, who are unin-
structed, or in a carnal state, would feel themselves justified
to continue their alliance with the world in the work of
God, and to go on as heretofore in their unscriptural pro-
ceedings respecting similar institutions, so far as the obtain-
ing "of means is concerned, if he were not to help me.
7. That the Lord would remember that I am his child,
and that he would graciously pity me, and remember that
_Z" cannot provide for these children, and that therefore he
would not allow this burden to He upon me long without
sending help.
8. That he would remember likewise my fellow-laborers
in the work, who trust in him, but who would be tried were
he to withhold supplies.
9. That he would remember that I should have to dis-
miss the children from under our scriptural instruction to
their former companions.
10. That he would show that those were mistaken who
said, that, at the first, supplies might be expected, while
the thing was new, but not afterwards.
11. That I should not know, were he to withhold means,
what construction I should put upon all the many most
remarkable answers to prayer which he had given me here-
tofore in connection with this work, and which most fully
have shown to me that it is of God.
In some small measure I now understand, experimen-
tally, the meaning of that word, "how long? which so fre-
quently occurs in the prayers of the Psalms. But even
1838. TRIAL. 147
now, by the grace of God, my eyes are up unto him only,
and I believe that he will send help.
Sept. 10. Monday morning. Neither Saturday nor
yesterday had any money come in. It appeared to me
now needful to take some steps on account of our need,
i. e. to go to the Orphan Houses, call the brethren and
sisters together (who, except brother T , had never
been informed about the state of the funds), state the case
to them, see how much money was needed for the present,
tell them that amidst all this trial of faith I still believed
that God would help, and to pray with them. Especially,
also, I meant to go for the sake of telling them that no
more articles must be purchased than we have the means
to pay for, but to let there be nothing lacking in any way
to the children, as it regards nourishing food and needful
clothing; for I would rather at once send them away than
that they should lack. I meant to go for the sake also of
seeing whether there were still articles remaining which
had been sent for the purpose of being sold, or whether
there were any articles really needless, that we might turn
them into money. I felt that the matter was now come to
a solemn crisis. About half-past nine sixpence came in,
which had been put anonymously into the box at Gideon
Chapel. This money seemed to me like an earnest that
God would have compassion and send more. About ten,
after I had returned from brother Craik, to whom I had
unbosomed my heart again, whilst once more in prayer for
help, a sister called who gave two sovereigns to my wife
for the orphans, stating that she had felt herself stirred up
to come, and that she had delayed coming already too long.
A few minutes after, when I went into the room where she
was, she gave me two sovereigns more, and all this without
knowing the least about our need. Thus the Lord most
mercifully has sent us a little help, to the great encourage-
ment of my faith. A few minutes after I was called on for
148 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IX.
money from the Infant Orphan House, to which I sent two
pounds, and one pound sixpence to the Boys' Orphan House,
and one pound to the Girls' Orphan House.
To-day I saw a young brother who, as well as one of
liis sisters, has been brought to the knowledge of the
Lord through my Narrative.
Sept. 11. The good Lord, in his wisdom, still sees it
needful to keep us very low. But this afternoon brother
T called, and told me that one of our fellow-
laborers had sold his metal watch, and two gold pins, for
one pound one shilling, that nine shillings sixpence had
come in, and that two of our fellow-laborers had sent two
lots of books of their own, nineteen and twenty-one in
number, to be sold for the orphans.
Sept. 12. Still the trial continues. Only nine shillings
came in to-day, given by one of the laborers. In the
midst of this great trial of faith the Lord still mercifully
keeps me in great peace. He also allows me to see that
our labor is not in vain; for yesterday died Leah Culli-
ford, one of the orphans, about nine years old, truly
converted, and brought to the faith some months before
her departure.
Sept. 13. No help has come yet. This morning I found
it was absolutely needful to tell the brethren and sisters
about the state of the funds, and to give necessary direc-
tions as to going into debt, etc. We prayed together, and
had a very happy meeting. They all seemed comfortable.
Twelve shillings sixpence was taken out of the boxes in
the three houses, twelve shillings one of the laborers gave,
and one pound one shilling had come in for needlework
done by the children. One of the sisters, who is engaged
in the work, sent a message after me, not to trouble myself
about her salary, for she should not want any for a twelve-
month.
Sept. 14. I met again this morning with the brethren
1838. TRIAL. 149
and sisters for prayer, as the Lord has not yet sent help.
After prayer one of the laborers gave me all the money he
had, sixteen shillings, saying that it would not be upright
to pray, if he were not to ~ive what he had. One of the
sisters told me that in six r^ays she would give six
pounds, which she had in the saVi >gs bank for such a time
of need. Up to this day, the matrons of the three houses
had been in the habit of paying the bakers and the milk-
man weekly, because they had preferred to receive the
payments in this way, and sometimes it had thus been also
with the butcher and grocer. But now, as the Lord deals
out to us by the day, we consider it would be wrong to go
on any longer in this way, as the week's payment might
become due, and we have no money to meet it ; and thus
those with whom we deal might be inconvenienced by us,
and we be found acting against the commandment of the
Lord, " Owe no man anything." Rom. xiii. 8. From this
day, and henceforward, whilst the Lord gives to us our
supplies by the day, we purpose, therefore, to pay at once
for every article as it is purchased, and never to buy any
thing except we can pay for it at once, however much it
may seem to be needed, and however much those with
whom we deal may wish to be paid only by the week.
The little which was owed was paid off this day.
Sept. 15. Saturday. We met again this morning for
prayer. God comforts our hearts. We are looking for
help. I found that there were provisions enough for to-day
and to-morrow, but there was no money in hand to take in
bread as usual, in order that the children might not have
newly baked bread. This afternoon one of the laborers,
who had been absent for several days from Bristol, re-
turned, and gave one pound. This evening we met again
for prayer, when I found that ten shillings sixpence more
had come in since the morning. With this one pound ten
shillings sixpence we were able - to buy, even this Satur-
13*
150 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. IX.
day evening, the usual quantity of bread (as it might be
difficult to get stale bread on Monday morning), and have
Borne money left. God be praised, who gave us grace to
come to the decision not *c cake any bread to-day, as
usual, nor to buy anyth?\g for which we cannot pay at
once. We were very comfortable, thankfully taking this
money out of our Father's hands, as a proof that he still
cares for us, and that, in his own time, he will send us
larger sums.
CHAPTER X.
DELIVERANCE.
1838.
"PERPLEXED BUT NOT IN DESPAIR " — FAITH JUSTIFIED— A LESSON OI
OBEDIENCE — BOUNTIFUL SUPPLIES — SPIRITUAL INGATHERING — A DAY
OF MERCIES — TIMELY AID— A SEASON OF PLENTY — OBEDIENCE RE-
WARDED.
SEPT. 16, 1838. Lord's day afternoon. We met again
for prayer respecting supplies for the orphans. We are in
peace, and our hope is in God, that he graciously will
appear, though but one shilling has come jn since last
evening.
Sept. 17. The trial still continues. It is now more and
more trying, even to faith, as each day comes. But I am
sure God will send help, if we can but wait. One of the
laborers had had a little money come in, of which he gave
twelve shillings sixpence ; another laborer gave eleven shil-
lings eightpence, being all the money she had left : this,
with seventeen shillings sixpence, which partly had come
in, and partly was in hand, enabled us to pay what needed
to be paid, and to purchase provisions, so that nothing yet,
in any way, has been lacking. This evening I was rather
tried respecting the long delay of larger sums coming; but
being led to go to the Scriptures for comfort, my soul was
greatly refreshed, and my faith again strengthened, by
152 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CHAP. X.
Psalm xxxiv., so that I went very cheerfully to meet with
my dear fellow-laborers for prayer. I read to them the
Psalm, and sought to cheer their hearts through the pre-
cious promises contained in it.
Sept. 18. Brother T. had twenty-five shillings in hand,
and I had three shillings. This one pound eight shillings
enabled us to buy the meat and bread which was needed,
a little tea for one of the houses, and milk for all : no more
than this is needed. Thus the Lord has provided not only
for this day, but there is bread for two days in hand. Now,
however, we are come to an extremity. The funds are
exhausted. The laborers who had a little money have
given as long as they had any left. Now observe how thf
Lord helped us ! A lady from the neighborhood of Lon-
don, who brought a parcel with money from her daughter,
arrived four or five days since in Bristol, and took lodgings
next door to the Boys' Orphan House. This afternoon she
herself kindly brought me the money, amounting to three
pounds two shillings and sixpence. We had been reduced
eo low as to be on the point of selling those things which
could be spared ; but this morning I had asked the Lord,
if it might be, to prevent the necessity of our doing so.
That the money had been so near the Orphan Houses for
several days without being given, is a plain proof that it
was from the beginning in the heart of God to help us ;
but, because he delights in the prayers of his children, he
had allowed us to pray so long ; also to try our faith, and to
make the answer much the sweeter. It is indeed a pre-
cious deliverance. I burst out into loud praises and thanks
the first moment I was alone after I had received the
money. I met with my fellow-laborers again this evening
for prayer and praise ; their hearts were not a little cheered.
This money was this evening divided, and will comfortably
provide for all that will be needed to-morrow.
Sept. 20. Morning. The Lord has again kindly sept ip
1S38. DELIVERANCE. 153
a little. Last evening was jgiven to me one shilling and
sixpence, and this morning one pound three shillings.
Evening. This evening the Lord sent still further sup-
plies ; eight pounds eleven shillings and twopence half-
penny came in, as a further proof that the Lord is not
unmindful of us. There was in the box of the Girls'
Orphan House one pound one shilling, and in that of the
Boys' Orphan House one pound seven shillings and two-
pence halfpenny. One of the laborers, in accordance with
her promise this day week, gave six pounds three shillings,
About eighteen months ago she saw it right no longer to
have money for herself in the Savings Bank, and she
therefore, in her heart, gave the money which she had
there to the Orphan Houses, intending to draw it in a time
of need. Some time .since (she told me this evening) she
drew a part of it to buy several useful articles for the
Orphan Houses ; now the sum was reduced to six pounds.
When she found out the present need, she went this day
week to the Savings Bank, and gave notice that she
wished to draw her money to-day.
Sept. 22. Both yesterday and to-day we have again
assembled for prayer and praise. We are in no immediate
want, but on the 29th, nineteen pounds ten shillings will
be due for the rent of the three Orphan Houses. To-day
there was only four shillings and sevenpence in hand foi
the other objects of the institution, though it was the pay
day for some of the teachers. My comfort was the living
God. During this week he had helped me so repeatedly
and in such a remarkable way, as it regards the Orphan
Houses, that it would have been doubly sinful not to have
trusted in him for help under this fresh difficulty. No
money came in this morning. About two, the usual time
when the teachers are paid, a sovereign was given, with
which I went immediately to brother T., who attends to
this part of the work, to pay, at least in part, the weekly
154 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X.
salaries. I found that he had received a sovereign in the
morning. By means of this sovereign, together with the
one which I had received just at the moment when it was
needed, we were helped through this day.
Sept. 25. Yesterday and the previous days we have
continued to assemble for prayer. In four days the rent for
the Orphan Houses will be due, and we have nothing
towards it ; also the housekeeping money in the three
houses is now again gone. May the Lord have compassion
on us, and continue to send us help ! This morning there
was found nine shillings and sixpence in the box in my
house. We met yesterday again for prayer. To-day I
was not able to go, on account of indisposition ; I sent,
therefore, to brother T. to request him to divide the
eighteen shillings and sixpence (ten shillings of which had
come in last evening, and eight shillings and sixpence of
which we had in hand) between the three matrons.
Sept. 29. Saturday evening. Prayer has been made
for several days past respecting the rent, which is due this
day. I have been looking out for it, though I knew not
whence a shilling was to come. This morning brother T.
called on me, and, as no money had come in, we prayed
together, and continued in supplication from ten till a
quarter to twelve. Twelve o'clock struck, the time when
the rent ought to have been paid, but no money had been
sent. For some days past I have repeatedly had a mis-
giving, whether the Lord might not disappoint us, in order
that we might be led to provide by the week, or the day,
for the rent. This is the second, and only the second,
complete failure as to answers of prayer in the work,
during the past four years and six months. The first was
about the half-yearly rent of Castle-Green school-rooms,
due July 1, 1837, which had come in only in part by that
time. I am now fully convinced that the rent ought to
bo put by daily or weekly, as God may prosper us, in order
1838. DELIVERANCE. 155
that the work, even as to this point, may be a testimony.
May the Lord, then, help us to act accordingly, and may
he npw mercifully send in the means to pay the rent !
Oct. 2. Tuesday evening. The Lord's holy name be
praised ! He hath dealt most bountifully with us during
the last three days ! The day before yesterday five pounds
came in for the orphans. O, how kind is the Lord!
Always before there has been actual want he has sent help.
Yesterday came in one pound ten shillings more. Thus
the expenses of yesterday for housekeeping were defrayed.
The Lord helped me also to pay yesterday the nineteen
pounds ten shillings for the rent. The means for it were
thus obtained : One of the laborers had received through
his family ten founds, and five pounds besides from a sister
in the Lord ; also some other money. Of this he gave six-
teen pounds, which, with the three pounds ten shillings
that was left of the above-mentioned five pounds, made up
nineteen pounds ten shillings, the sum which was needed.
This day we were again greatly reduced. There was no
money in hand to take in bread, as usual, for the Boys' and
Infant Orphan Houses. But again the Lord helped. A
sister who had arrived this afternoon from Swansea brought
one pound seven shillings, and one of the laborers sold an
article, by means of which he was able to give one pound
thirteen shillings. Thus we had three pounds, — one pound
for each house, — and could buy bread before the day was
over. Hitherto we have lacked nothing!
Oct. 9. To-day we were brought lower than ever.- The
provisions would have lasted out only to-day, and the
money for milk in one of the houses could only be made
up by one of the laborers selling o^e of his books. The
matron in the Boys' Orphan House had this morning two
shillings left. When in doubt whether to buy bread with
it, or more meat, to make up the dinner with the meat
which she had in the house, the baker called, and left three
156 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X.
quarterns of bread as a present. In this great need, some
money having been given to one of the laborers, he gave
two pounds of it, by which we were able to buy meat,
bread, and other provisions.
Oct. 10. The coals in the Infant Orphan House are out,
and nearly so in the other two houses. Also the treacle
casks in all the three houses are nearly empty. On this
account we have asked the Lord for fresh supplies.
Oct. 11. The "Father of the fatherless " has again shown
his care over us. An orphan from Devonshire arrived last
evening. With her was sent two pounds five shillings and
sixpence. The sister who brought her gave also a silver
tea-pot, sugar-basin, and cream-jug, of the weight of forty-
eight ounces, having found true riches in Christ. There
was also in the boxes nine shillings. One of the laborers
paid for a ton of coals. We obtained sixteen pounds six-
teen shillings for the silver articles. Thus we were helped
through the heavy expenses of the following days.
Oct. 12. To-day seven brethren and sisters were added
to us in fellowship, and eight were proposed. May the
Lord send helpers for the work !
Oct. 15. I knew that there would be money needed
this morning for many things in the Orphan Houses, and
my heart was therefore lifted up to the Lord. Just when
I was going to meet my fellow-laborers for prayer, I
received from Trowbridge four pounds. There had come
in also at the Orphan Houses seven shillings and three-
pence. To this one of the laborers added one pound.
Thus I was enabled abundantly to supply all that was
wanted, and to pay for a cask of treacle and a ton of coals.
We a7*e now, however, cast again on the love of our Lord
for further supplies, as there is neither anything in hand,
nor have the laborers any more of their own to give.
Oct. 16. I was looking up to the Lord for help early thia
morning, when, almost immediately afterwards, brother T.
1838. DELIVERANCE. 157
came, and brought two silver tablespoons and six tea-
spoons, which had been left anonymously, yesterday after-
noon, at the Girls' Orphan House. This afternoon I
received twelve pounds from Staffordshire.
Oct. 22. To-day our funds were again quite low. In
the Infant Orphan House only twopence was left, and very
little in the other two houses. But the Lord most mani-
festly again answered prayer, by sending four pounds three
shillings and one penny.
Oct. 27. Thanks to our adorable Lord ! this day also we
have not been confounded ; for there was six shillings in
the box at the Infant Orphan House, and six shillings came
in for things which had been given to be sold. To this
one of the laborers added eighteen shillings. By means
of this one pound ten shillings we have been able to meet
all pressing demands, and to procure provisions for to-day
and to-morrow.
Oct. 29. Monday. The Lord has again given us this
day our daily bread, though in the morning there was not
the least natural prospect of obtaining supplies.
Oct. 30. This has been again a day of peculiar mercies
in reference to the funds. Whilst I was in prayer respecting
them a brother brought two and a quarter yards of cloth.
He had bought it for himself, but afterwards, considering
that he had sufficient clothes, he gave it to be sold for the
orphans. This evening a sister gave me twenty pounds,
ten of which were for the Orphans, and ten for the other
objects.
Nov. 7. The funds are now again completely ex-
hausted.
Nov. 10. Saturday. All seemed to be dark, so far as
regards natural appearances, at the commencement of this
day. But the Lord has helped us, and enabled us to meet
all demands. We were brought to the close of one more
week, having been able to supply the necessities of ninety -
u
158 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X,
Beven persons in the Orphan Houses, without owing any-
thing.
Nov. 13. This morning our want was again great. I
have twenty pounds in hand which has been put by for
rent, but, for the Lord's honor, I would not take of it.
Nothing had come in, and the laborers had scarcely any-
thing to give. I went, however, to the Orphan Houses, to
pray with my fellow-laborers, and, if it might be, to coin-
fort them, and see what could be done. When I came
there I found that nineteen shillings and sixpence had
come in this morning. On inquiry I heard that only twe
shillings and sixpence more was needed to carry us through
the day. This one of the laborers was able to add of hi&
own. Thus the Lord has again helped us out of our diffi-
culty. One of the laborers gave some things which he
could do without, and another gave a workbox to be sold
for the orphans. Before this day has come to an end, the
Lord has sent in one pound two shillings and fourpence
more, so that we have also a little for to-morrow.
Nov. 20. To-day our need was exceedingly great, but
the Lord's help was great also. I went to meet with the
brethren and sisters as usual. I found that one pound
would be needed to supply the necessities of to-day, but
three shillings only had come in. Just when we were,
going to pray, one of the laborers came in, who, after
prayer, gave ten shillings. Whilst we were praying, an-
other laborer came in, who had received one pound. Thug
we had one pound thirteen shillings, — even more, there-
fore, than was absolutely needed.
Nov. 21. Never were we so reduced in funds as to-day.
There was not a single halfpenny in hand between the
matrons of the three houses. Nevertheless, there was a
good dinner, and by managing so as to help one another
with bread, etc., there was a prospect of getting over thia
day also ; but for none of the houses had we the prospect
J838. DELIVERANCE. 159
of being able to take in bread. When I left the brethren
and sisters at one o'clock, after prayer, I told them that
we must wait for help, and see how the Lord would de-
liver us at this time. I was sure of help, but we were
indeed straitened. When I came to Kingsdown, I felt
that I needed more exercise, being very cold, wherefore I
went not the nearest way home, but round by Clarence-
place. About twenty yards from my house I met a brother,
who walked back with me, and after a little conversation
gave me ten pounds to be handed over to the brethren, the
deacons, towards providing the poor saints with coals,
blankets, and warm clothing; also five pounds for the
orphans, and five pounds for the other objects of the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution. The brother had called
twice while I was gone to the Orphan Houses, and had I
now been one half minute later I should have missed him.
But the Lord knew our need, and therefore allowed me to
meet him.
Nov. 24. This again has been a very remarkable day.
We had as little in hand this morning as at any time, and
yet several pounds were needed. But God, who is rich in
mercy, and whose word so positively declares that none
who trust in him shall be confounded, has helped us
through this day also. While I was in prayer, about ten
in the morning, respecting the funds, I was informed that
a gentleman had called to see me. He came to inform me
that a lady had ordered three sacks of potatoes to be sent
to the Orphan Houses. Never could they have come more
seasonably. This was an encouragement to me to continue
to expect help. When I came to the prayer meeting, about
twelve o'clock, I heard that two shillings had come in, also
one pound for a guitar, which had been given for sale.
The payment for this guitar had been expected for many
weeks. It had been mentioned among us repeatedly that
it might come just at a time when we most needed it j and
160 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CIIAP. X.
O, how true! But with all this we could not have put hy
the rents for this week, amounting to thirty shillings. One
of the laborers therefore gave his watch to the orphan
fund, under this condition, that should the Lord not enable
us before December 21 to make up this deficiency, it should
be sold, but not otherwise, as he needs it in the Lord's
service. [A few days after the Lord gave the means to
put by the thirty shillings, and thirty shillings besides for
the next week's rent.] Thus the Lord helped us through
this day, and with it brought us to the close of one more
week.
Nov. 28. This is perhaps of all days the most remark-
able as yet, so far as it regards the funds. When I was in
prayer this morning respecting them, I was enabled firmly
to believe that the Lord would send help, though all
seemed dark as to natural appearances. At twelve o'clock
I met as usual with the brethren and sisters for prayer.
There had come in only one shilling, which was left last
evening anonymously at the Infant Orphan House, and
which, except twopence, had already been spent, on account
of the great need. I heard also that an individual had
gratuitously cleaned the timepiece in the Infant Orphan
House, and had offered to keep the timepieces in the three
houses in repair. Thus the Lord gave even in this a little
encouragement, and a proof that he is still mindful of us.
On inquiry, I found that there was everything needful for
the dinner in all the three houses; but neither in the
Infant nor Boys' Orphan Houses was there bread enough
for tea, nor money to buy milk. Lower we had never
been, and perhaps never so low. We gave ourselves now
unitedly to prayer, laying the case in simplicity before the
Lord. Whilst in prayer there was a knock at the door,
and one of the sisters went out. After the two brethren
who labor in the Orphan Houses and I had prayed aloud,
Wo continued for a while silently in prayer. As to myselfj
838. DELIVERANCE. 161
I was lifting up my heart to the Lord to make a way for
our escape, and in order to know if there were any other
thing which I could do with a good conscience, besides
waiting on him, so that we might have food for the chil-
dren. At last we rose from our knees. I said, " God will
surely send help." The words had not quite passed over
my lips, when I perceived a letter lying on the table, which
had been brought whilst we were in prayer. It was from
my wife, containing another letter from a brother with ten
pounds for the orphans. The evening before last I was
asked by a brother whether the balance in hand for the
orphans would be as great this time, when the accounts
would be made up, as the last time. My answer was that
it would be as great as^the Lord pleased. The next morn-
ing this brother was moved to remember the orphans, and to
send to-day ten pounds, which arrived after I had left my
house, and which, on account of our need, was forwarded
immediately to me. The brother who sent the ten pounds
for the orphans sent likewise ten pounds to be divided
between brother Craik and me, with the object of pur-
chasing new clothes for ourselves.
Nov. 29. The Lord has greatly blessed our meetings
for prayer. They have been instrumental in leading us to
much prayer for the children in the Orphan Houses, in
the day schools, and in the Sunday school. They have
led us to prayer for ourselves, for the day-school teachers,
and for the Sunday-school teachers, that grace may be
given to us so to walk before the children, and so to deal
with them, as that the Lord may be glorified by us. We
have also often been led to intercede for the believers
with whom we are in fellowship, and for the church at*
large. We have especially prayed that our work may lead
the church generally to a more simple confidence and trust
in the Lord. That these meetings have not been in vain,
as regards the procuring of funds, has been already suffi-
14*
162 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X.
ciently seen by the many instances which have been
recorded in the foregoing pages. To-day, however, we
have had another particular proof of this. When we met
I founci that ten shillings had come in yesterday afternoon.
When I returned home I found one pound had come in,
and shortly after I received another pound. In the even-
ing I received fifty pounds, which was sent from Suffolk
by a sister who had often expressed how gladly she would
contribute more largely to the work which is in our hands
had she the means, and who just now, in this our time of
need, has obtained the means to carry out the desire of her
heart. I rejoice in the last donation particularly, not be-
cause of the largeness of the sum, but because it . enables
me to pay to my brethren and sisters, in the Orphan Houses
the salary which is due to them.
Dec. 6. This afternoon I received one hundred pounds
from a sister, — fifty for the orphans, and fifty for the
school, Bible, and missionary fund. This same sister, who
earns her bread with her own hands, had given, on October
5, 1837, fifty pounds towards the Boys' Orphan House,
and gave for the necessities of the poor saints, in August,
1838, one hundred pounds more ; for she had been made
willing to act out those precious exhortations : " Having
food and raiment, let us be therewith content." " Sell that
ye have, and give alms ; provide yourselves bags which
wax not old, a treasure in the heavens that faileth not,
where no thief approacheth, neither moth corrupteth."
" Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where
moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break
through and steal ; but lay up for yourselves treasures in
heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and
where thieves do not break through nor steal." Respecting
the fifty pounds which has been given of this sum for the
school, Bible, and missionary fund, it is worthy o*' remark,
that we would not order reference Bibles till w? U^d tV
1838. DELIVERANCE. 16 5
means. We had repeatedly prayed respecting this tvant
of Bibles, and particularly again this morning. It had
been also much laid on our hearts to-day to request that
the Lord would enable us to have the Report printed, which
we could not do unless he first sent the means. Lastly,
we had also repeatedly asked him to supply us so largely,
if it were his will, as that at the time of the public meet-
ings we might be able to speak again of abundance. For
though for some months past the time has been fixed for
the public meetings, without any reference to the state of
the funds, nevertheless, it might have had the appearance
that we had convened the brethren for the sake of telling
them about our poverty, and thus to induce them to give.
Dec. 11, 12, and 13. On the evenings of these three days
there were public meetings, at which I gave an account of
the Lord's dealing with us in reference to the Orphan
Houses and the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge
Institution. As the work, and particularly that of the
Orphan Houses, was begun for the benefit of the church at
large, it appeared well to us that from time to time it should
be publicly stated how the Lord had dealt with us in refer-
ence to it; and as, on Dec. 9, the third year had been
completed since the commencement of the orphan work,
this seemed to be a suitable time for having these meetings.
I notice briefly the following particulars respecting the
first three objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution.
1. There is at present — December, 1838 — a Sunday school
supported by it, which contains four hundred and sixty-
three children. This part of the work calls for particular
thanksgiving; for during these last eighteen months the
number of the children has been nearly three times as great
as it used to be. Five of the scholars have been converted
within the last two years, and are now in fellowship with
the church, and three of them are teachers in the school.
2. There is in connection with the Institution an adult
164 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X
school, in which, since the commencement of the work,
above one hundred and twenty adults have been instructed,
and in which at present twelve are taught to read. 3. The
Institution has entirely supported, since its commencement,
several day schools for poor children, and within the
last two years six of such, — three for boys and three for
girls. The number of all the children that have had school-
ing in the day schools through the medium of the Institu-
tion, since its formation, amounts to 1,534 ; the number of
those at present in the six day schools is 342. 4. During
the last two years there have been circulated 1,884 copies
of the Scriptures in connection with the Institution, and
since the beginning of the work, March 5, 1834, 5,078 copies.
5. For missionary purposes have been laid out £74, 18s. 4d.
6. The total of the income for the first three objects, during
the last two years, was £1,129, 13s. Id.; the total of the
expense, £1,111, 13s. 7Jd.
There are, at present, 86 orphans in the three houses,
i. e. 31 in the Girls' Orphan House, 31 in the Infant Orphan
House, and 24 in the Boys' Orphan House. The whole
number of orphans who have been under our care from
April 11, 1836, to Dec. 9, 1838, amounts to 110.
The total of the income for the orphans, from Dec. 9,
1836, to Dec. 9, 1838, has amounted to £1,341, 4s. 7d.; the
total of the expenses to £1,664, 4s. Of d. There was two
years ago a balance of £373, 4s. 8|d. in hand, and now the
balance is £50, 5s. 3d.
Dec. 16. There was a paper anonymously put into the
box at Bethesda Chapel containing four pounds ten shillings.
In the paper was written, " For the rent of the Orphan
Houses, from Dec. 10 to Dec. 31, 1838. 'O, taste and see
that the Lord is good: blessed is the man that trusteth in
himrv In order that the reader maybe able to enter into
the value of this donation, I would request him to read
over once more what I wrote under "Sept. 29 " of this year.
1838. DELIVERANCE. 165
[The individual who gave this four pounds ten shillings foi
the rent of the Orphan Houses for the first three weeks
after the public meetings, at which the matter about the
rent, for the instruction of the brethren, was fully stated,
continued for three years, up to Dec. 10, 1841, to give reg-
ularly, but anonymously, one pound ten shillings a week
for the same purpose, which was exactly the sum required
every week for the rent of those three houses. Thus the
Lord rewarded our faithfulness in carrying out the light
which he had given us. But the chief blessing resulting
from this circumstance I consider to be this, — that several
brethren, who earn their bread by the labor of their hands,
have learned through this circumstance that it is the will
of the Lord they should layby their rent weekly. I beseech
those brethren who are not pursuing this course to do so,
and they will soon prove by experience the benefit of acting
on scriptural principles even as it regards this life.]
Dec. 17. To-day eleven brethren and sisters were pro-
posed for fellowship.
Dec. 20. As the expenses for the orphans have been
above forty-seven pounds within the last six days, and as
but little above thirteen pounds has come in, and as the
money for printing the Report had to be kept back, in order
that we might not be in debt, we were again to-day very
low in funds, though it is but six days since the public
meetings. As I knew that to-morrow several pounds
would be needed to supply the matrons, I gave myself this
morning to prayer. About a quarter of an hour afterwards
I received three pounds, the payment of a legacy left by a
sister, who fell asleep in Jesus several months since, in Ire-
land. Besides this I received from the brother through
whom the legacy was paid, two pounds ten shillings for the
orphan fund. With this five pounds ten shillings I hope
to be able to meet the expenses of to-morrow.
Dec. 22. A solemn day. I received to-day the information
166 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. X.
that my brother died on October 7. " Shall not the Judge
of all the earth do right?" must be the stay of the believer
at such a time, and, by grace, it is my stay now. I know
that the Lord is glorified in my brother, whatever his end
has been. May the Lord make this event a lasting bless-
ing to me, especially in leading me to earnestness in prayer
for my father !
REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1838.
1. As to the church. There are 405 at present in fellow-
ship with us; Gl having been added last year, of whom 36
have been brought among us to the knowledge of the truth.
2. As to my temporal supplies. The Lord has been
pleased to give me during the past year £350, 4s. Scl.
During no period of my life had I such need of means,
on account of my own long illness and that of my dear
wife, and on account of the many and particular calls for
means, as during the past year; but also during no period
of my life has the Lord so richly supplied me. Truly, it
must be manifest to all that I have served a most kind
Master, during this year also, and that, even for this life, it
is by far the best thing to seek to act according to the mind
of the Lord as to temporal things!
CHAPTER XI.
ASKING AN D R E CEI VI NG.
1839.
HELP FOR THE POOR SAINTS — THE UNFAILING BANK — MEANS EXHAUSTED —
LIBERALITY OF A LABORING SISTER — "HE KNOWETH OUR FRAME" —
REDEEMING THE TIME — GODLINESS PROFITABLE UNTO ALL THINGS.
JANUARY 1, 2, and 3, 1839. We have had three especial
church prayer meetings these three days. The year com-
menced with mercies. In the first hour of the year there
came in for the orphans two pounds seven shillings, which
was given after our usual prayer meeting on December 31,
which this time lasted from seven in the evening till after
midnight.
Jan. 5. To-day I received another new hat, the eleventh
which in succession has been given to me since I have been
in England.
Jan. 20. For some time past it has appeared to me that
the words, "Ye have the poor with you always, and when-
soever ye will ye may do them good," which the Lord
spoke to his -disciples, who icere themselves very poor, imply
that the children of God, as such, have power with God to
bring temporal blessings upon poor saints or poor unbe-
lievers through the instrumentality of prayer. Accordingly,
I have been led to ask the Lord for means to assist poor
saints; and at different times he has stirred up his children
168 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XI
to intrust me with sums, both large and small, for that
especial object; or has, by some means or other, put money
at my disposal, which I might so use. In like manner I
had been asking again for means, a few days since, to be
able more extensively to assist the poor saints in commu-
nion with us, as just now many of them are not merely
tried by the usual temporal difficulties arising from its
being winter, but especially from the high price of bread.
And now this evening the Lord has given me the answer
to my prayer. When I came home from the meeting I
found a brother at my house who offered to give me ten
pounds a week, for twelve weeks, towards providing the
poor saints with coals and needful articles of clothing, but
chiefly with bread. [Accordingly, this brother sent me,
two days afterwards, one hundred and twenty pounds,
whereby very many, especially poor widows, were greatly
assisted, chiefly with flour and bread. This money just
lasted till the price of bread was reduced from ninepence
halfpenny to sevenpence halfpenny.]
Feb. 7. This day has been one of the most remarkable
days as it regards the funds. There was no money in
hand. I was waiting upon God. I had asked him repeat-
edly, but no supplies came. Brother T. called, between
eleven and twelve o'clock, to tell me that about one pound
two shillings would be needed, to take in bread for the
three houses and to meet the other expenses ; but we had
only two shillings ninepence, which yesterday had been
taken out of the boxes in the Orphan Houses. He went
to Clifton to make arrangements for the reception of the
three orphans of our sister Loader, who fell asleep on the
4th; for, though we have no funds in hand, the work goes
on, and our confidence is not diminished. I therefore
requested him to call, on his way back from Clifton, to see
whether the Lord might have sent any money in the mean
time. When he came I had received nothing, but one of
1839. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 169
the laborers, having five shillings of his own, gave it. It
was now four o'clock. I knew not how the sisters had got
through the day. Toward the close of the day I went to the
Girls' Orphan House, to meet with the brethren for prayer.
When I arrived there I found that a box had come for me
from Barnstable. The carriage was paid, else there would
have been no money to pay for it. (See how the Lord's
hand is in the smallest matters!) The box was opened,
and it contained, in a letter from a sister, ten pounds, of
which eight pounds was for the orphans, and two pounds
foi the Bible Fund; from brethren at Barnstable, two
pounds eleven shillings twopence; and from another
brother, five shillings. Besides this, there were in the box
four yards of merino, three pairs of new shoes, two pairs
of new socks ; also six books for sale ; likewise a gold pen-
cil-case, two gold rings, two gold drops of earrings, a neck*
lace, and a silver pencil-case. On inquiry how the sisters
had been carried through the day, I found it thus: Every-
thing was in the houses which was needed for dinner.
After dinner a lady from Thornbury came and bought one
of my Narratives and one of the Reports, and gave three
shillings besides. About five minutes afterwards the baker
came to the Boys' Orphan House. The matron of the
Girls' Orphan House seeing him, went immediately with
the six shillings sixpence which she had just received
(to prevent his being sent away, as there was no money in
hand at the Boys' Orphan House), and bought bread to
the amount of four shillings sixpence. The two remain-
ing shillings, with the little which was in hand, served to
buy bread for the Girls' Orphan House. By the donations
sent in the box I was enabled to give a rich supply to the
matrons before the close of the day.
February 13. This evening five pounds was given me,
which had come in under the following circumstances :
A gentleman and lady visited the Orphan Houses, and
15
170 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XL
met at the Boys' Orphan House two ladies who were like-
wise visiting. One of the ladies said to the matron of the
Boys' Orphan House, " Of course you cannot carry on
these Institutions without a good stock of funds." The^
gentleman, turning to the matron, said, " Have you a good
stock? " She replied, "Our funds are deposited in a bank
which cannot break." The tears came into the eyes of
the inquiring lady. The gentleman, on leaving, gave to
the master of the boys five pounds, which came in when 1
had not a penny in hand.
March 5. To-day, however, I knew that there would be
again several pounds required, as, besides the daily provi-
sions, there were coals needed, the treacle casks in two
houses were empty, and there was but five shillings in
hand. I gave myself therefore to prayer this morning.
WHILST I WAS IN PEAYEE, Q. Q. sent a check for seven
pounds ten shillings.
March 23. To-day I received a letter from brother T.,
who is, on account of his health, in Devonshire, to inform
me that a heavy gold chain, a ring set with ten brilliants, a
pair of gold bracelets, and two pounds, have been given to
him. He gave a Report to a brother, who, having read it,
was thereby stirred up to prayer, and knowing that his
believing sister possessed these trinkets, he asked the Lord
to incline her heart to give them up for the benefit of
our orphans, which she soon after did. By means of these
donations I am able both to meet the remaining expenses
of this week, and also to pay fifteen pounds, which still
remains due on account of the salaries. My fellow-labor-
ers not only never ask me for anything, but are willing to
part with money, or anything else, in the hour of need ;
nevertheless, I asked the Lord about this point frequently,
and he has now given me my request, whereof I am glad.
April 13. I conversed with another of the orphans,
who seems to have been truly converted, and who has
1839. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 171
walked consistently for many months. To-monow she
will be united with the saints in communion.
April 14. To-day five pounds eightpence came in
for the orphans, one pound of which is one of the most
remarkable gifts that we have ever had. A poor brother,
with a large family and small wages, — there are eight in
the family, and he had fifteen shillings wages till lately,
when they were raised to eighteen shillings, — put by this
money by little and little of what was given him by his
master for beer. This brother, who was converted about
five years ago, was before that time a notorious drunkard.
July 2. To-day was given to me, when there was not
one shilling in hand, fifty pounds, for the school, Bible, and
missionary fund.
July 15. Monday. To-day two pounds seven shillings
threepence was needed for the orphans, but we had noth-
ing. How to obtain the means for a dinner, and for what
else was needed, I knew not. My heart was perfectly at
peace, and unusually sure of help, though I knew not in
the least whence it was to come. Before brother T. came,
I received a letter from India, written in May, with an
order for fifty pounds for the orphans. I had said last Sat-
urday to brother T. that it would be desirable to have fifty
pounds, as the salaries of all my fellow-laborers are due,
the three treacle casks empty, all the provision stores
exhausted, several articles of clothing needed, and worsted
for the boys to go on with their knitting.
August 19. Monday. This has been again a day in
which our faith has been particularly tried ; but even this
day we have not been confounded. "Not one penny was
in hand when the day began. We had, therefore, now,
for more than one hundred persons, again to look to the
Lord. But this I must say, to the praise of the Lord, my
soul was perfectly at peace. I meant to have gone very
early to the Orphan Houses to meet with my fellow-labor
172 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CIIAP. XL
ers for prayer ; but as one person after the other called
upon me, I was kept from it the whole morning. When
brother T. called upon me, between twelve and one o'clock,
for money, I had none to give. In the afternoon at four I
was able to meet with the brethren and sisters. When I
came to the Girls' Orphan House, I found that one of
those children, for the reception of whom we had given
notice, had been brought from Bath, and with him was
sent one pound five shillings. After the meeting was over
one of the laborers gave ten shillings. By means of this
one pound fifteen shillings we were able for this day also to
provide everything needful.
August 22. In my morning walk, when^ I was remind-
ing the Lord of our need, I felt assured that he would
send help this day. My assurance sprang from our need ;
for there seemed no way to get through the day without
help being sent. After breakfast I considered whether
there was anything which might be turned into money
for the dear children. Among other things there came
under my hands a number of religious pamphlets which
had been given for the benefit of the orphans ; but all
seemed not nearly enough to meet the necessities of the
day. In this our deep poverty, after I had gathered to-
gether the few things for sale, a sister, who earns her bread
by the labor of her hands, brought eighty-two pounds. This
sister had seen it to be binding upon believers in our Lord
Jesus to act out his commandments : " Sell that ye have
(sell your possessions) and give alms," Luke xii. 33 ; and
" Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth," Matt.
vi. 19. Accordingly, she had drawn her money out of the
bank and stocks, being two hundred and fifty pounds, and
had brought it to me at three different times, for the benefit
of the orphans, the Bible, missionary, and school fund, and
the poor saints. About two months ago she brought me
one hundred pounds more, being the produce of some other
IS39. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 173
possession \yhich she had sold, the half of which was to
be used for the school, Bible, and missionary fund, and the
other half for the poor saints. This eighty-two pounds which
she has brought to-day is the produce of the sale of her
last earthly possession. [At the time I am preparing this
fifth edition for the press, more than sixteen years have
passed away, and this sister has never expressed the least
regret as to the step she took, but goes on quietly laboring
with her hands to earn her bread.]
September 4. I have been led to pray whether it is the
Lord's will that I should leave Bristol for a season, as I
have for the last fortnight been suffering from indigestion,
by which my whole system is weakened, and thus the
nerves of my head are more than usually affected. There
are, however, two hindrances in the way, — want of means
for the orphans, and want of means for my own personal
expenses. To-day I have received a check from Q. Q.
for seven pounds ten shillings for the orphans, which came,
therefore, very seasonably. Also four pounds besides have
*iome in since the day before yesterday.
September 5. To-day a sister sent me five pounds for
myself, to be used for the benefit of my health. She had
heard that my health is again failing. I do not lay by
money for such purposes ; but whenever I really need
means, whether for myself or others, the Lord sends them,
in answer to prayer ; for he had in this case again given
me prayer respecting means for myself, and for the
orphans, that my way might be made plain as to leaving
Bristol for a season.
September 7. Trowbridge. This has been a very good
day. I have had much communion with the Lord. How
kind to take me from the work in Bristol for a season, to
give me more communion with himself. I remembered
the Lord's especial goodness to me in this place at the
commencement of last year. How kind has he also been
15*
174 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XI
since ! I prayed much for myself, for the church at large,
for the saints here and in Bristol, for my unconverted
relatives, for my dear wife, and that the Lord would supply
my own temporal necessities, and those of the orphans ;
and I Jcnow that he has heard me. I am surrounded with
kind friends in the dear saints, under whose roof I am, and
feel quite at home. My room is far better than I need :
yet an easy chair, in this my iceak state of body, to kneel
before in prayer, would have added to my comfort. In the
afternoon, without having a hint about it, I found an easy
chair put into my room. I was struck with the kindness,
the especial kindness of my heavenly Father, in being
mindful of the smallest wants and comforts of his child.
Having had more prayer than usual, I found that my inter-
course with the saints at tea was with unction, and more
than usually profitable.
September 9. I returned to Bristol, to go from hence
to-morrow to Exeter, if the Lord permit, on account of
my health. I had been earnestly asking the Lord while
I was staying at Trowbridge that he would be pleased to
send in supplies for the orphans before I go into Devon-
shire, and I had the fullest assurance that means would
come in before I left Bristol. I therefore asked my wife,
on my return, how much had come in, and found that it
was only eight pounds nine shillings seven and three-
fourths pence. This was not nearly as much as I had
expected, and would not answer the end for which I had
particularly asked means, i. e. that I might be able to leave
enough for several days. My reply, therefore, was accord-
ing to the faith given to me, and judging from the earnest-
ness and confidence of my prayer that the Lord would send
more before I left. About an hour after, brother Craik
brought me ten pounds, and also a letter, in which the
arrival of a large box full of articles, to be sold for the
benefit of the orphans, is announced.
1839. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 175
Upon his return from his journey, Mr. M. writes : —
During my stay at Plymouth, I was stirred up afresh to
early rising, a blessing, the results of which J have not lost
sinee. That which led rne to it was the example of the
brother in whose house I was staying, and a remark which
he made in speaking on the sacrifices in Leviticus, " that
as not the refuse of the animals was to be offered up, so the
lest part of our time should be especially given to commu-
nion with the Lord." I had been, on the whole, rather an
early riser during former years. But since the nerves of
my head had been so weak, I thought that, as the day AV;IS
long enough for my strength, it would be best for me not
to rise early, in order that thus the nerves of my head
might have the longer quiet. On this account I rose only
between six and seven, and sometimes after seven. For
the same reason also I brought myself purposely into the
habit of sleeping a quarter of an hour, or half an hour, after
dinner : as I thought I found benefit from it, in quieting
the nerves of my head. In this way, however, my soul had
suffered more or less every day, and sometimes consider-
ably, as now and then unavoidable work came upon me
before I had had sufficient time for prayer and reading the
word. After I had heard the remark to which I have
alluded, I determined that, whatever my body might suffer,
I would no longer let the most precious part of the day
pass away while I was in bed. By the grace of God I was
enabled to begin the very next day to rise earlier, and have
continued to rise early since that time. I allow myself
now about seven hours' sleep, which, though I am far from
being strong, and have much to tire me mentally, I find is
quite sufficient to refresh me. In addition to this I gave
up the sleeping after dinner. The result lias been that I
have thus been able to procure long and precious seasons
for prayer and meditation before breakfast ; and as to my
176 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XX
body, and the state of the nervous system in particular, I
have been much better since. Indeed, I believe that the
very worst thing I could have done for my weak nerves
was to have lain an hour or more longer in bed than I used
to do before my illness ; for it was the very way to keep
them weak. As this may fall into the hands of some chil-
dren of God who are not in the habit of rising early, I make
a few more remarks on the subject.
I. It might be asked, How much time shall I allow my-
self for rest ? The answer is, that no rule of universal ap-
plication can be given, as all persons do not require the
same measure of sleep, and also the same persons, at differ-
ent times, according to the strength or weakness of their
body, may require more or less. Females also, being gene-
rally weaker in body, require more sleep than males. Yet,
from what I can learn, it is the opinion of medical persons
that men in health do not require more than between six
and seven hours' sleep, and females no more than between
seven and eight hours ; so that it would be rather an ex-
ception for a man to require more than seven and a woman
more than eight hours. But my decided advice, at the
same time, is, that children of God would be careful not to
allow themselves too little sleep, as there are few men who
can do with less than six hours' sleep, and yet be well in
body and mind, and few females who can do with less than
seven hours. Certain it is that for a long time, as a young
man, before I went to the university, I went to bed regu-
larly at ten and rose at four, studied hard, and was in good
health ; and certain also, that since I have allowed myself
only about seven hours, from the time of my visit at Ply-
mouth in Oct. 1839, 1 have been much better in body, and
in my nerves in particular, than when I was eight or eight
hours and a half in bed.
II. If it be asked, But why should I rise early ? The
reply is, " To remain too long in bed" is, 1. Waste o
1839. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 177
which is unbecoming a saint, who is bought by the precious
blood of Jesus, with his time and all he has, to be used for
the Lord. If we sleep more than is needful for the refresh-
ment of the body, it is wasting the time with which
the Lord has intrusted us as a talent, to be used for his
glory, for our own benefit, and the benefit of the saints
and the unbelievers around us. 2. To remain too long iu
bed injures the body. Just as when we take too much food,
we are injured thereby, so as it regards sleep. Medical per-
sons would readily allow that the lying longer in bed than
is needful for the strengthening of the body does weaken
h. 8. It injures the soul. The lying too long in bed
not merely keeps us from giving the most precious
part of the day to prayer and meditation, but this sloth
leads also to many other evils. Any one need but make
the experiment of spending one, two, or three hours in
prayer and meditation before breakfast, either in his
room, or with his Bible in his hand in the fields, and
he will soon find out the beneficial effect which early
rising has upon the outward and inward man. I be-
seech all my brethren and sisters into whose hands this
may fall, and who are not in the habit of rising early, to
make the trial, and they will praise the Lord for having
done so.
III. It may lastly be said, But how shall I set about ris-
ing early ? My advice is, 1. Commence at once, delay it
not. To-morrow begin to rise. 2. But do not depend upon
your own strength. This may be the reason why before
this you may have begun to rise early, but have given it up.
As surely as you depend upon your own strength in this
matter, it will come to nothing. In every good work we
depend upon the Lord, and in this thing we shall feel espe-
cially how weak we are. If any one rises that he may give
the time which he takes from sleep to prayer and medita-
tion, let him. be sure that Satan will try to put obstacles
1 [8 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. Xt
into tlie way. 3. Do trust in the Lord for help. You will
honor him if you expect help from him in this matter.
Give yourself to prayer for help, expect help, and you will
have it. 4. Use, however, in addition to this, the following
means : a. Go early to bed. If you stay up late, you cannot
rise early. Let no society and no pressure of engagements
keep you from going habitually early to bed. If you fail in
this, you neither can nor ought to get up early, as your
body requires rest. Keep also particularly in mind, that
neither for the body nor soul is it the same thing whether
you go to bed late and rise late, or whether you go to bed
early and rise early. Even medical persons will tell you
how injurious it is to sit up late, and to spend the morning
hours in bed ; but how much more important still is it to
retire early and to rise early, in order to make sure of time
for prayer and meditation before the business of tlie day
commences, and to devote to those exercises that part of our
time when the mind and the budy are most fresh, in order
thus to obtain spiritual strength for the conflict, the trials,
and the work of the day. b. Let some one call you, if pos-
sible, at the time which you have determined before God
that you will rise ; or procure, what is still better, an ala-
rum, by which you may regulate almost to a minute the
time when you wish to rise. For about twelve shillings a
little German clock with an alarum may be bought almost
in every town. Though I have very many times been awak-
ened by the Lord, in answer to prayer, almost to the min-
ute when I desired to rise ; yet I thought it well to pro-
cure an alarum to assist me in my purpose of rising early :
not indeed as if it could give the least help, without the
Lord's blessing, for I should remain in bed notwithstand-
O'
ing the noise of the alarum, were he not to give me grace
to rise ; but simply looking upon it as a means. c. Rise
at once when you are awake. Remain not a minute longer
in bed, else you are likely to fall asleep again, d. Be not
1839. ASKING AND RECEIVING. 179
discouraged by feeling drowsy and tired in consequence of
your rising early. This will soon wear off. You will after
a few days feel yourself stronger and fresher than when
you used to lie an hour or two longer than you needed.
e. Allow yourself always the same hours for sleep. Make
no change except sickness oblige you.
On December 10, 11, and 12 we had public meetings, at
which the account of the Lord's dealings with us in refer-
ence to the Orphan Houses and the other objects of the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution was given. It is now—-
December 10, 1839 — five years and nine months since the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution has been in operation.
During the last year also. 1. We have been enabled to
continue to provide all the needful expenses connected
with the six day schools, three for boys and three for girls.
The number of the children who are at present in them
amounts to 286. The number of all the children that
have had schooling in the day schools, through the medium
of the Institution, since its formation, amounts to 1,795.
2. There are at present 226 children in the Sunday school.
3. There are 14 taught to read in the adult school, and
there have been about 130 adults instructed in that school
since the formation of the Institution. 4. There have
been circulated, during the last year, 514 copies of the
Scriptures, and 5,592 since March 5, 1834. 5. There has
been laid out, during the last year, £91, 6s. for missionary
purposes. 6. There have been received into the three
Orphan Houses, from December 9, 1838, to December 9,
1839, 16 orphans. There are at present 96 orphans in the
three houses. The number of all the orphans who have
been under our care from April 11, 1836, to December 9,
1839, amounts to 126.
For the Orphan Houses, without any one having been
asleed for anything by us, the sum of £3,067, 8s. 9 Id. haa
180 THE LIFE OF TROST. CHAP. XL
been given, entirely as the result of prayer to God, from
the commencement of the work up to December 9, 1839.
The total of the expenses connected with the objects of
the Institution, exclusive of the Orphan Houses, from No-
vember 19, 1838, to November 19, 1839, is £542, 13s.
The balance in hand on November 19, 1839, was 18s. 5d.
The total of the expenses connected with the three
Orphan Houses, from December 9, 1838, to December 9,
1839, is £960, 9s. 2|d. The balance in hand on December
9, 1839, was £46, 8s. Id.
December 31. My health is much better than for years.
My mental powers also are as good as they have been at
any time during the last three years. I ascribe this to
God's blessing, through the instrumentality of early rising,
and plunging my head into cold water when I rise.
REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1839.
1. As to the church : During the last year have been
added 115; of whom 34 have been brought to the knowl-
edge of the Lord among us.
2. As to my temporal supplies, the Lord has been pleased
to give me, during the past year, £313, 2s. 5d.
CHAPTER XII.
PLENTY AND WANT.
1840.
A PURE OFFERING REQUIRED — A JOURNEY PROPOSED — SEASONABLE PRO-
VISION—LOOKING ONLY TO THE LORD — THE WRATH OF MAN PRAISING
GOD— A PROMISE FULFILLED — BENEFIT OF TRIAL — NEW SPRINGS
OPENED — BEFORE THEY CALL I WILL ANSWER — TRUST IN GOD COM-
MENDED—SPIRITUAL BLESSINGS.
JANUARY 1, 1840. This morning, about one hour after
midnight, I received a paper with some money sealed up in
it for the orphans. A few minutes afterwards, I remem-
bered that the individual who gave it was in debt, and I
was aware that she had been repeatedly asked by her cred-
itors for payment. I resolved, therefore, without opening
the paper, to return it, as no one has a right to give whilst
in debt. This was done when I knew that there was not
enough in hand to meet the expenses of the day. About
eight, this morning, a brother brought five pounds, which
he had received just then from his mother, for the orphans.
Observe, the brother is led to bring it at once !
January 25. I have been much in prayer this week
about going to Germany : 1. To see certain brethren who
purpose to go as missionaries to the East Indies ; and, 2.
To see my father once more. I am led to go just now,
instead of delaying it, because my health is again so failing
16
182 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. 'XII
that it seems desirable I should leave Bristol at all events ;
and thus I could continue to serve in the work of the
Lord, and yet attend to the benefit of my health at the
same time. Lord, keep me from making a mistake in this
matter !
January 31. There is only one shilling fivepence in
hand. The Lord will provide ! I feel quite comfortable,
though in three days I shall have to leave the work for
several weeks. After I had written the above, I received
sixteen pounds for the orphans, and twenty-four pounds
for the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Insti-
tution. Thus the Lord will kindly allow me to leave a
little money behind on my departure, and I have also a
still further answer to my prayer for means to purchase
Bibles, for which I have asked the Lord repeatedly, and
which he began to answer by the donation which I re-
ceived on the 22d. I have received five pounds, besides,
for the other objects.
Feb. 2. To-day and yesterday has come in still further,
before my departure, nearly nine pounds for the orphans.
How kind of the Lord to send this money just now, on the
eve of my leaving home !
Mr. Miiller's absence lasted from Feb. 3 to March 9.
Under the latter date he writes: —
During the whole time of my absence the Lord not only
supplied all the need of the orphans, but on my return I
found more in hand than there was when I left. The
donations, which came in during my absence, amount to
between eighty and ninety pounds.
March 26. On the 17th of this month I received the
following letter from a brother who several times had been
used by the Lord as an instrument in supplying our need,
and who also, two months since, sent thirty pounds.
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 183
" I have received a little money from . Have you
any present need for the Institution under your care? I
know you do not ask, except indeed of Him whose work
you are doing ; but to ansioer when asked seems another
thing, and a right thing. I have a reason for desiring to
know the present state of your means towards the objects
you are laboring to serve, viz. should you not have need,
other departments of the Lord's work, or other people of
the Lord, may have need. Kindly then inform me, and to
what amount, i. e. what amount you at this present time
need, or can profitably lay out."
At the time when this letter came we were indeed in
need. Nevertheless, I considered that, as I have hitherto
acted (i. e. telling the Lord alone about our need), I ought
to continue to do, as otherwise the principal object of the
work, to be a help to the saints generally, by seeking to
lead them to increased dependence upon God alone,
through this Institution, would be frustrated. I answered
therefore the letter in substance as follows : —
" Whilst I thank you for your love, and whilst I agree
with you, that, in general, there is a difference between
asking for money and answering when asked, nevertheless
in our case I feel not at liberty to speak about the state of
our funds, as the primary object of the work in my hands
is to lead those who are weak in faith to see that there is
reality in dealing with God alone"
After having sent off the answer, I was again and again
led to pray to the Lord in this way : " Lord, thou knowest
that for thy sake I did not tell this brother about our need.
Now, Lord, show afresh that there is reality in speaking to
thee only about our need, and speak therefore to this
brother, so that he may help us."
To-day, in answer to this my request, this brother sent
one hundred pounds. Thus I have means for establishing
the infant school, and for ordering more Bibles. Also the
184 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XII.
orphans are again supplied for a week; for when the
money caine in, there was not one penny in hand for
them.
April 7. This evening I received information from my
little half brother that my clear father died on March 30.
During no period did I pray more frequently or more
earnestly for the conversion of my dear aged parent than
during the last year of his life ; but, at all events, it did
not please the Lord to let me see the answer to my prayers.
April 9. We are on the point of sending some money
to the East Indies for missionary objects. Whilst I was
on my knees respecting this object, five pounds was brought
for it.
May 2. Nothing having come in for five days, we were
to-day again penniless. In answer to prayer five shillings
sixpence came in, and some trinkets were sent, the
names of which the donor does not wish to be known.
Thus we were helped through this day. Observe here how
the Lord allowed five days to pass away without influencing
the hearts of any to send us supplies ; but the moment
there is real need, the stream runs again.
May 3. Last evening a brother was baptized, who on
the first Lord's day of this year came with his intended
wife to Bethesda Chapel. Both were in an unconverted
state. Only since April 1, forty-one persons have come
to us to speak about their souls.
May 8. There are four believers staying at my house,
and to-day we had only a few shillings of our own money
left. I gave myself, "therefore, to prayer for means for our
own personal expenses. In answer to my request, I
received this morning five pounds.
May 10. To-day five of the orphans were baptized.
There are now fourteen of them in fellowship.
May 26. Nothing had come in. My engagements kept
me from going to the Orphan Houses till seven in the
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 185
evening, when the laborers met together for prayer. When
we met I found that one of them had given seventeen
shillings, which had been divided between the three
houses. This, with the little which had been left yester-
day, had procured all necessary articles. We are now
very poor.
May 27. We met for prayer at eleven this morning.
No money had come in, but there was enough for dinner
in all the houses. This morning the last coals were used
in the Infant Orphan House, and in the Boys' Orphan
House there were only enough for to-day, and there was no
money in hand to buy more. In this our need T. P. C.
sent a load of coals. We purpose to meet again at four
this afternoon. May the Lord graciously be pleased to
eend help in the mean time !
Evening. The Lord has had mercy ! A person bought
some days since several articles, which had been given to
be sold for the benefit of the orphans, and owed six pounds
fifteen shillings. This morning I asked the Lord to incline
his heart to bring the money, or a part of it, as we were
in such need. Just as I was going to meet for prayer with
my fellow-laborers this afternoon, he came and brought
four pounds. But our kind Father showed us still further
to-day that only for the trial of our faith he had for a sea-
son withheld supplies ; for there was given this evening,
with Eccles. ix. 10, five pounds. There came in also
nine shillings for articles which had been put into the
hand of a sister, who has taken on her the service of dis-
posing of articles which are given for sale. Thus the day,
which had begun with prayer, ended in praise. But there
is one thing more to be recorded respecting this day, as
precious or more so than what has been said : I was to-day
informed that the Lord has begun to stir up several of the
hoys to care about their souls.
June 17. For several days past I had been very poor in
16*
186 ' THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIL
reference to ray own temporal necessities, as T\ell as in ref-
erence to the orphans. To-day we were especially poor,
in both respects ; but our kind Father remembered not
merely the need of the dear orphans, but gave me also
some money for my own personal expenses. The same
sister just referred to, who brought five pounds ten shil-
lings sixpence for the orphans, brought me also seven
pounds for myself.
June 22. To-morrow, the Lord willing, I purpose, with
my wife, to accompany the three German brethren and the
five German sisters to Liverpool, who purpose to sail from
thence. Under these circumstances it is desirable to leave
at least a little money behind. This desire of my heart
the Lord has granted ; for this morning D. C. gave me five
pounds, and there came in by sale of articles ten shil-
lings fivepence. In the evening a sister, who has leit
Bristol to-day, sent me by her mother five pounds.
During the absence of Mr. M. the wants of the or.
phans were supplied in a wonderful manner. To men-
tion but one instance, at a time when there was extreme
need, a poor German missionary, just embarking for 3
heathen land, gave six pounds ten shilling?, being
his all.
The f -llowing event came to his notice during his
journey: —
About October, 1837, 1 sent some Bibles and forty-six
copies of my Narrative to a brother in Upper Canada,
who, in dependence upon the Lord for temporal supplies,
is laboring as a missionary in that country. About eighteen
months afterwards I heard that this box had not arrived.
I had reason to think that the broker had never sent off
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 187
the box. My comfort, however, was, that though thia
poor sinner had acted thus, yet the Lord, in his own place
and way, would use the Bibles and my Narratives. Now,
almost immediately after my arrival in Liverpool, a brother
told me that several persons wished to hear me preach who
had read my Narrative ; and that he knew a considerable
number had been bought by a brother, a bookseller, from
pawnbrokers, and sold again ; and that some also had been
ordered from London when there were no more to be had
otherwise. It was thus evident that the ship-broker
pawned these Narratives before he absconded; but the
Lord used them as I had hoped.
Aug. 1. A few days since a brother was staying with
me, on his way to his father, whom he had not seen for
above two years, and who was greatly opposed to him, on
account of the decided steps which his son had taken for
the Lord. Before this brother left, that precious promise
of our Lord was brought to my mind : " If two of you
shall agree on earth as touching anything that they shall
ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in
heaven." (Matt, xviii. 19.) Accordingly, I went to the
brother's room, and having agreed to pray about a kind
reception from his father, and the conversion of both par-
ents, we prayed together. To-day this brother returned.
The Lord has answered already one part of the prayer.
The brother was most kindly received, contrary to all
natural expectation. May the Lord now help us both to
look for an answer to the other part of our prayer ! There
is nothing too hard for the Lord !
Since the publication of the last edition, the father of
this brother died. He lived above ten years after Aug. 1,
1840, until he was about eighty-six years of age, and as he
continued a life of much sin and opposition to the truth,
the prospect with reference to his conversion became
darker and darker. But at last the Lord answered prayer.
188 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XII.
This aged sinner was entirely changed, simply rested on
the Lord Jesus for the salvation of his soul, and became as
much attached to his believing son as before he had been
opposed to him, and wished to have him about him as
much as possible, that he might read the Holy Scriptures
to him and pray with him.
Aug. 8. Saturday. This evening I was meditating on
the fourth Psalm. The words in verse three, " But
know that the Lord has set apart him that is godly for
himself; the Lord will hear when I call upon him," I was
enabled to apply to myself, and they led me to prayer for
spiritual blessings. Whilst in prayer, the need of the or-
phans, there being now again not one penny in hand, was
also brought to my mind, and I asked the Lord respecting
this likewise. About Jive minutes afterwards I was
informed that a sister wished to see me. She brought one
pound ten shillings for the orphans. Thus the Lord has
already kindly sent a little to begin the week with. There
was also still further given to-day, one shilling eleven-
pence ; and five shillings one penny was taken out of the
boxes in the Orphan Houses.
Aug. 15. There was to-day the greatest poverty in all
the three houses; all the stores were very low, as the
income throughout the week had been so small. In addi-
tion to this it was Saturday, when the wants are nearly
double in comparison with other days. At least three
pounds was needed to help us comfortably through the
day ; but there was nothing towards this in hand. My
only hope was in God. The very necessity led me to ex-
pect help for this day ; for if none had come, the Lord's
name would have been dishonored. Between twelve and
one, two sisters in the Lord called on me ; and the one
gave me two pounds, and the other seven shillings six-
pence for the orphans. With this I went to the Boys'
Orphan House about one o'clock, where I found the chii-
184<X PLENTY AND WANT. 189
dren at dinner. Brother B. put the following note into
my hand, which he was just going to send off: —
" DEAR BROTHER, — With potatoes from the children's
garden, and with apples from the tree in the playground
(which apples were used for apple-dumplings), and four
shillings sixpence, the price of some articles given by
one of the laborers, we have a dinner. There is much
needed. But the Lord has provided and will provide."
August 23. Lord's day. As we have often found it to
be the case, so it is again now. After the Lord has tried
our faith, he, in the love of his heart, gives us an abun-
dance, to show that not in anger, but for the glory of his
name, and for the trial of our faith, he has allowed us to be
poor. The Lord has kindly given to-day twelve pounds
seventeen shillings.
August 29. For many weeks past very little has come
in for the other funds. The chief supply has been by the
sale of Bibles. Last Saturday I was not able to pay the
whole of the weekly salaries • of the teachers in the day
schools, which, however, does not make me a debtor to
them, as it is an understood tiling that they have not to
look to me for payment, but to the Lord. To-day again
only two shillings was in hand, whilst several pounds were
needed to pay the salaries. It appeared now plainly to be
the will of the Lord that, as all the laborers in the Orphan
Houses know about the state of the funds, so the brethren
and sisters who labor in the day schools should share the
trial of faith and the joy of faith with us. Accordingly
we all met, and after I had laid on their hearts the impor-
tance of keeping to themselves, for the Lord's sake, the
state of the funds, we prayed together.
September 5. Saturday. Because there had come in
so little during the last days, at least three pounds was
requisite to supply the need of to-day. There was, how-
ever, not one penny in hand when the day commenced.
190 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XII.
Last evening, the laborers in the Orphan Houses, together
with the teachers of the day schools, met for prayer.
This morning, one of the teachers, who had a little money
of his own, brought one pound five shillings sixpence.
Thus we were enabled to provide for the dinner. In the
afternoon all of us met again for prayer. Another teacher
of the day schools gave two shillings sixpence, and one
shilling came in besides. But all this was not enough.
There was no dinner provided for to-morrow, nor was
there any money to take in milk to-morrow, and besides
this a number of other little things were to be purchased,
that there might be no real want of anything. Now
observe how our kind Father helped us ! Between seven
and eight this evening, a sister, whose heart the Lord has
made willing to take on her the service of disposing of the
articles which are sent for sale, brought two pounds ten
shillings sixpence, for some of the things which came
a fortnight ago from Worcester, and last Wednesday from
Leeds. The sister stated, that though she did not feel at
all well, she had come because she had it so laid on her
heart that she could not stay away.
September 8. How kindly has the Lord so ordered it
that for some time past the income for the school fund
should have been so little, in order that thus we might be
constrained to let the laborers in the day schools share
our joys and our trials of faith, which had been before
kept from them ! But as above two years ago the Lord
ordered it so that it became needful to communicate to the
laborers in the Orphan Houses the state of the funds, and
made it a blessing to them, so that I am now able to leave
Bristol, and yet the work goes on, so, I doubt not, the
brethren and sisters who are teachers in the day schools
will be greatly blessed by being thus partakers of our
precious secret respecting the state of the funds. Our
prayer meetings have been already a blessing to us, and
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 191
united us more than ever in the work. We have them
now every morning at seven, and we shall continue them,
the Lord helping us, till we see his hand stretched forth,
not merely in giving us means for the teachers, but also for
other purposes ; for we need 'a stove in one of the school-
rooms, a fresh supply of several kinds of Bibles and New
Testaments, and it is desirable to have means to help mis-
sionary brethren who labor in dependence upon the Lord
for the supply of their temporal necessities.
September 21. To-day a brother from the neighborhood
of London gave me ten pounds, to be laid out as it might
be most needed. As we have been praying many days for
the school, Bible, and missionary funds, I took it all
for them. This brother knew nothing about our work,
when he came three days since to Bristol. Thus the Lord,
to show his continual care over us, raises up new helpers.
They that trust in the Lord shall never be confounded.
Some who helped for a while may fall asleep in Jesus ;
others may grow cold in the service of the Lord ; others
may be as desirous as ever to help, but have no longer the
means ; others may have both a willing heart to help, and
have also the means, but may see it the Lord's will to lay
them out in another way ; — and thus, from one cause or
another, were we to lean upon man, we should surely be
confounded ; but, in leaning upon the living God alone, we
are BEYOND disappointment, and BEYOND being forsaJcen
because of death, or wa,nt of means, or want of love, or
because of the claims of other worJt.
October 7. It is now five weeks since we have daily
met for prayer. Not indeed merely to ask for means,
but for grace and wisdom for ourselves in reference to the
work, for the conversion of the children under our care,
for grace for those children who stand already on the
Lord's side, for a blessing upon the circulation of the
Scriptures, for a blessing upon the work with reference to
192 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XII.
the church at large, etc. But whilst we thus, as the Spirit
led us, prayed for various things, nevertheless, the lack of
means was that which had brought us day after day together.
We asked the Lord to give us the means which are needed
for carrying on the day schools, for buying Bibles, as
several sorts are needed, and to enable us to assist mission-
ary work in foreign countries. Never at any previous
time, since first the work commenced on March 5, 1834,
have we had to continue so long a time in prayer for these
funds, without obtaining the answer. The Lord, however,
gave us grace to " continue in prayer," and kept our hearts
in the assurance that he would help. Now, though he
delayed long, before he sent us the answer, in his own
time he made it manifest that he had not only not shut
his ear against our prayers in anger, but that he had
answered them even before we called; for there was sent
to-day, from the East Indies, a bank order for one hundred
pounds, which had been sent off two months since, there-
fore several days before we even began to pray. It was left
to me to apply this money as it might be needed. As we
had so long and so particularly prayed for these funds,
I took the whole of it for them, and not for the orphan
fund.
October 26. Yesterday morning, when I took my hat
from the rail, I found in one of my gloves a note contain-
ing a five-pound note, and the following words : " Two
pounds for the orphans, the rest for dear brother and sister
Miiller." There came in still further yesterday two pounds
twelve shillings sixpence. Thus we are again supplied for
about three days.
In reference to the note which was put into my hat,
containing five pounds, I just add, that I had repeatedly
asked the Lord for means for our own personal expenses,
previous to the reception of it, as we had but very little
money for ourselves. Indeed, the very moment before I
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 193
took my hat from the rail, I had risen from my knees, hav-
ing again asked the Lord for means for ourselves and for
the orphans.
November 8. I purposed to have gone to Trowbridge
yesterday, and had settled it so on Friday evening with
brother . But no sooner had I decided to do so, than
I felt no peace in the prospect of going. After having
prayed about it on Friday evening and yesterday morning,
I determined not to go, and I felt sure the Lord had
some reason for not allowing me to feel happy in the pros-
pect of going. I .began now to look out for blessings for
this day, considering that the Lord had kept me here for
good to some souls. This evening I was especially led to
press the truth on the consciences of the unconverted,
entreating and beseeching them, and telling them also that
I felt sure the Lord had, in mercy to some of them, kept
me from going to Trowbridge. I spoke on Genesis vi. 1-5.
Immediately after, I saw fruit of the word. An individual
fully opened his heart to me. I walked about with him
till about ten o'clock, even as long as I had any strength
left. [About ten days afterwards, a brother told me of a
poor drunkard who heard me that evening, and who since
then had stayed up till about twelve o'clock every night
to read the Scriptures, and who had not been intoxicated
since.]
At the close of these details, with reference to the year
from December 9, 1839, to December 9, 1840, I make a
few remarks.
1. Though our trials of faith during this year also have
been many, and recurring more frequently than during
any previous year, and though we have been often reduced
to the greatest extremity, yet the orphans have lacked
nothing ; for they always have had good nourishing food,
aiid the necessary articles of clothing, etc.
2. Should it be supposed by any one, in reading the
17 .
196 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XII
bread, particularly the poorer classes of them, I give jmy
affectionate' yet solemn advice to carry into practice the
principles on which this Institution is conducted as it re-
. gards not going into debt. Are you in debt ? then make
confession of sin respecting it. Sincerely confess to the
Lord that you have sinned against Rom. xiii. 8. And if
you are resolved no more to contract debt, whatever may
be the result, and you are waiting on the Lord and truly trust
in him, your present debts will soon be paid. Are you out
of debt ? then, whatever your future want may be, be re-
solved, in the strength of Jesus, rather to suffer the great-
est privation, whilst waiting upon God for help, than to
use unscriptural means, such as borrowing, taking goods
on credit, etc., to deliver yourselves. This way needs but
to be tried, in order that its excellency may be enjoyed.
There are a few points more which may be of interest
to the believing reader, which I shall now add.
1. There have been, during this year, six day schools for
poor children entirely supported by the funds of our Insti-
tution, all of which have been established by us.
The number of all the chiMren that have had schooling
in the day schools through the medium of the Institution,
since its formation, amounts to 2-216 ; the number of those
at present in the six day schools is 803.
These day schools have defravpcl, by the payments of
the children, about the sixth part of tbeir own expenses.
2. There is one Sunday school entirely supported by the
funds of the Institution.
3. There has been, since the formation of the Institution,
one adult school connected with it, in whicK, on the Lord's
clay afternoons, since that time, about 150 adpUs have been
instructed.
4. The number of Bibles and Testaments which have
been circulated through the medium of our Institution,
during the last year, amounts to 452 copies.
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 197
There have been circulated since March 5, 1834, 6,044
copies of the Scriptures.
5. There have been laid out, during the last year, of the
funds of the Institution, £120, 10s. 2d. for missionary pur-
poses.
0. There are at present ninety-one orphans in the three
houses. The total number of the orphans who have been
finder our care from April 11, 1836, to December 9, 1840,
amounts to 129.
Without any one having been asked for anything by
MS, the sum of £3,937, Is. Id. has been given to us for the
Orphan Houses, as the result of prayer to God, since the
commencement of the work.
THE BLESSING OF THE LOED UPON THE WOEK IN REF-
EEENCE TO THE SOULS OF THE CHILDEEN.
1. During the last fourteen months there have been
meetings purposely for children, at which the Scriptures
have been expounded to them. At these meetings an
almost universal attention is manifested by them, which I
thankfully ascribe to the Lord, and upon which I look as a
forerunner of greater blessing*
2. During the last year three of the Sunday-school chil-
dren have been received into fellowship.
3. At the end of last year there had been eight orphans
received into communion ; during the present year four-
teen have been received ; in all, twenty-two.
It was stated in the last year's Report that we were look-
ing for fruit upon our labors as it regards the conversion of
the children, as the Lord had given to us a measure of
earnestness in praying for them. The Lord has dealt with
us according to our expectations. But I expect far more
than what we have seen. While the chief object of our
work has been and is still the manifestation of the heart of
<3od towards his children, and the reality of power with
198 THE LIFE OF TRUST. OAP. XtL
God in prayer, yet, as we hoped, and as it hits been our
prayer, the Lord gives to us also the joy of seeing one
child after another brought to stand openly on the Lord's
side. As far as my experience goes, it appears to me that
believers generally have expected far too little of present
fruit upon their labors among children. There has been a
hoping that the Lord some day or other would own the
instruction which they give to children, and would answer
at some time or other, though after many years only, the
prayers which they offer up on their behalf. Now, while
such passages as Proverbs xxii. 6, Ecclesiastes xi. 1, Gala-
tians vi. 9, 1 Cor. xv. 58, give unto us assurance not merely
respecting everything which we do for the Lord, in gen-
eral, but also respecting bringing up children in the fear of
the Lord, in particular, that our labor is not in vain in the
Lord ; yet we have to guard against abusing such passages,
by thinking it a matter of little moment whether we see
present fruit or not ; but, on the contrary, we should give
the Lord no rest till we see present fruit, and therefore in
persevering yet submissive prayer we should make known
our requests unto God. I add, as an encouragement to
believers who labor among children, that during the last
two years seventeen other young persons or children, from
the age of eleven and a half to seventeen, have been,
received into fellowship among us, and that I am looking
out now for many more to be converted, and that not
merely of the orphans, but of the Sunday and day school
children. As in so many respects we live in remarkable
times, so in this respect also, that the Lord is working
greatly among the children in many places.
The total of the expenses connected with the objects of
the Institution, exclusive of the Orphan Houses, from No-
vember 19, 1839, to November 19, 1840, is £622, 2s. 6id.
The balance in hand on Nov. 19, 1840, was £13, 2s. 9f d.
The total of the expenses connected with the three
1840. PLENTY AND WANT. 199
Orphan Houses, from December 9, 1839, to December 9,
1840, is £900, 11s. 2£d. The balance in hand on Decem-
ber 9, 1840, was £15, Is. 6}d.
REVIEW OF THE YEAR 1840.
1. As to the church. There are 525 at present in com-
munion ; 114 have been added during the past year, of
whom 47 have been brought to the knowledge of the Lord
among us.
2. As to the supply of my temporal necessities. The
Lord has been pleased to send me, by the freewill offerings
of the saints, £242, 8s. 1H.1
i It may not be improper to state here that the little patrimony to which
Mr. Miiller became entitled upon the decease of his father was devoted to the
purposes of charity and religion, in accordance with the principle of action
indicated on page 67. This fact is not mentioned by Mr. M., but has come
to the knowledge of the editor through another channel. — ED.
CHAPTER XIII.
PAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE.
1841.
A WANT SUPPLIED — RESOURCES EXCEEDING THE DEMAND — EVIL OF
SURETYSHIP — POWER OF CHRISTIAN LOVE — GOD'S WORD THE FOOD
OF THE SOUL — PREPARATION FOR THE HOUR OF TRIAL — POVERTY —
DEPENDING ONLY ON THE LIVING GOD.
JANUARY 1, 1841. During this week we have daily met
for prayer, for the especial purpose of asking the Lord to
give us the means of having the last year's Report printed.
It is three weeks since it might have been sent to the
press. We felt this now to be a matter of especial impor-
tance, as, if the Report were not soon printed, it would
be known that it arose from want of means. By the
donations which came in during these last days for the
orphans, and by ten pounds which was given to-day for
the other funds, we have the means of defraying the
expense of about two thirds of the printing, and therefore
a part of the manuscript was sent oflj trusting that the
Lord would be pleased to send in more means before two
sheets are printed off ; but if not, we should then stop till
we have more. Evening. There came in still further five
pounds ; also, ten shillings and three shillings.
Jan. 11. Monday. During the last week the Lord
not only supplied us richly with all we needed for the
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 201
orphans, but enabled us to put by several pounds towards
printing the Report. On Saturday evening there was
only three shillings sixpence left. On this account I was
looking out for answers to my prayers for means, and the
Lord did not disappoint me. There came in altogether
yesterday nine pounds sixteen shillings fourpence. We
have now enough even for the last part of the Report.
Jan. 12. To-day I have received a letter from a
brother, in which he empowers me to draw upon his
bankers, during this year, to the amount of one thousand
pounds, for any brethren who have it in their hearts to
give themselves to missionary service in the East Indies,
and whom I shall consider called for this service, as far as
I am able to judge. [This power lasted only for that
year ; but no brethren who seemed to be suitable offered
themselves for this service. This is another fresh proof
how much more easily pecuniary means can be obtained
than suitable individuals. Indeed, in all my experience I
have found it thus, that if I could only settle that a certain
thing to be done was according to the will of God, the
means were soon obtained to carry it into effect.]
Jan. 13. This evening I was called to the house of
a brother and sister who are in the deepest distress. The
brother had become surety for the debts of his son, not in
the least expecting that he ever should be called upon for
the payment of them ; but, as his son has not discharged
his debts, the father has been called upon to do so ; and
except the money is paid within a few days, he will be
imprisoned.
How precious it is, even for this life, to act according to
the w ord of God ! This perfect revelation of his mind
gives us directions for everything, even the most minute
affairs of this life. It commands us, " Be not thou one of
them that strike hands, or of them that are sureties for
debts." Pror. xxii. 26. The way in which Satan ensnares
202 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIIL
persons, to bring them into the net, and to bring trouble
upon them by becoming sureties, is, that he seeks to repre-
sent the matter as if there were no danger connected with
that particular case, and that one might be sure one should
never be called upon to pay the money ; but the Lord, the
faithful Friend, tells us in his own wcrd that the only way
"to be sure" in such a matter is "to hate suretyship."
Prov. xi. 15. The following points seem to me of solemn
moment for consideration, if I were called upon to become
surety for another : 1. What obliges the person who
wishes me to become surety for him to need a surety ?
Is it really a good cause in which I am called upon to
become surety? I do not remember ever to have met
with a case in which in a plain, and godly, and in all
respects scriptural matter such a thing occurred. There
was generally some sin or other connected with it. 2. If
I become surety, notwithstanding what the Lord has said
to me in his word, am I in such a position that no one will
be injured by my being called upon to fulfil the engage-
ments of the person for whom I am going to be surety ?
In most instances this alone ought to keep one from it.
3. If still I become surety, the amount of money for which
I become responsible must be so in my power that I am
able to produce it whenever it is called for, in order that
the name of the Lord may not be dishonored. 4. But if
there be the possibility of having to fulfil the engagements
of the person in whose stead I have to stand, is it the will
of the Lord that I should spend my means in that way ?
Is it not rather his will that my means should be spent in
another way ? 5. How can I get over the plain word of
the Lord, which is to the contrary, even if the first four
points could be satisfactorily settled ?
March 4. From February 22 up to this day our neces-
sities in the day schools were supplied by thirteen small
donations, and by a donation of eight pounds from Q. Q,
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 203
To-day I received fifteen pounds. When this am red
there was not one penny in hand for the day schools,
whilst two days after about seven pounds was needed.
This money came from a considerable distance, and from
a brother who never had assisted in this work before,
whereby the Lord afresh shows how easily he can raise up
new helpers.
For the encouragement of believers, who are tried by
having unconverted relatives and friends, I will relate the
following circumstance, the truth of which I know.
Baron Von K., who resided in my own country, the
kingdom of Prussia, had been for many years a disciple of
the Lord Jesus. Even about the commencment of this
century, when there was almost universal darkness or even
open infidelity spread over the whole continent of Europe,
he knew the Lord Jesus ; and when, about the year 1806,
there was the greatest distress in Silesia among many
thousands of weavers,- this blessed man of God took the
following gracious step for his Lord and Master. As the
weavers had no employment, the whole continent almost
being in an unsettled state on account of Napoleon's
career, it seemed to him the will of the Lord that he
should use his very considerable property to furnish these
poor weavers with work, in order to save them from the
greatest state of destitution, though in doing this there
was not only no prospect of gain, but the certain pros-
pect of immense loss. He therefore found employment
for about six thousand weavers. But he was not content
with this. Whilst he gave the bread which perishes, he
also sought to minister to the souls of these weavers. To
that end he sought to set believers as overseers over this
immense weaving concern, and not only saw to it that the
weavers were instructed in spiritual things, but he himself
also set the truth before them. Thus it went on for a
good while, till at last, on account of the loss of the chief
OS
204 THE LIFE OF TKUST. CHAP. XIII.
part of his property, he was obliged to think about giving
it up. But by this time this precious act of mercy had so
commended itself to the government that it was taken up
by them and carried on till the times altered. Baron von
K. was, however, appointed director of the whole concern
as long as it existed.
This dear man of God was not content with this. He
travelled through many countries to visit the prisons, for
the sake of improving the temporal and spiritual condition
of the prisoners, and among all the other things which he
sought to do for the Lord was this also in particular : He
assisted poor students whilst at the university of Berlin,
especially those who studied divinity, as it is called, in
order to get access to them, and to win them for the Loid.
One day a most talented young man, whose father lived at
Breslau, where there is likewise a university, heard of the
aged baron's kindness to students, and he therefore wrote
to him, requesting him to assist him, as his own father
could not well afford to support him any longer, having
other children to provide for. A short time afterwards
young T. received a most kind reply from the baron, invit-
ing him to come to Berlin ; but, before this letter arrived,
the young student had heard that Baron von K. was a
pietist or mystic, as true believers are contemptuously
called in Germany ; and as young T. was of a highly
philosophical turn of mind, reasoning about everything,
questioning the truth of revelation, yea, questioning, most
sceptically, the existence of God, he much disliked the
prospect of going to the old baron. Still, he thought he
could but try, and if he did not like it, he was not bound
to remain in connection with him. He arrived in Berlin
on a day when there was a great review of the troops, and,
being full of this, he began to speak about it to the stew-
ard of the baron. The steward, however, being a believer,
turned the conversation, before the young student was
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 205
aware of it, to spiritual things ; and yet he could not say
that it had been forced. He began another subject, and a
third, but still it always came presently again to spiritual
things.
At last the baron came, who received young T. in the
most affectionate and familiar manner, as if he had been
his equal, and as if young T. bestowed a favor on him,
rather than that he was favored by the baron. The baron
offered him a room in his own house, and a place at his
own table, while he should be studying in Berlin, which
young T. accepted. He now sought in every way to treat
the young student in the most kind and affectionate way,
and as much as possible to serve him, and to show him the
power of the gospel in his own life, without arguing with
him, yea, without speaking to him directly about his soul.
For, discovering in young T. a most reasoning "and scepti-
cal mind, he avoided in every possible way getting into
any argument with him, while the young student again
and again said to himself, " I wish I could get into an
argument with this old fool ; I would show him his folly."
But the baron avoided it. When the young student used
to come home in the evening, and the baron heard him
come, he would himself go to meet him on entering the
house, would light his candle, would assist and serve him
in any way he could, even to the fetching the bootjack for
him, and helping him to take off his boots. Thus this
lowly aged disciple went on for some time, whilst the
young student still sought an opportunity for arguing with
him, but wondered nevertheless how the baron could thus
serve him. One evening, on the return of young T. to the
baron's house, when the baron was making himself his
servant as usual, he could refrain himself no longer, but
burst out thus : " Baron, how can you do all this ? You
see I do not care about you, and how are you able to con-
tinue to be so kind to me, and thus to serve me ? " The
18
206 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP.. XIIL
baron replied, " My dear young friend, I have learned it
from the Lord Jesus. I wish you would read through the
Gospel of John. Good night." The student now for the
first time in his life sat down and read the word of God in
a disposition of mind to be willing to learn, whilst up to
that time he had never read the Holy Scriptures but with
the view of wishing to find out arguments against them.
It pleased God to bless him. From that time he became
himself a follower of the Lord Jesus, and has been so ever
since.
May 7. It has recently pleased the Lord to teach me a
truth, irrespective of human instrumentality, as far as I
know, the benefit of which I have not lost, though now,
while preparing the fifth edition for the press, more than
fourteen years have since passed away. The point is this :
I saw more clearly than ever that the first great and pri-
mary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to
have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be con-
cerned about was not how much I might serve the Lord,
how I might glorify the Lord ; but how I might get my
soul into a happy state, and how my inner man might be
nourished. For I might seek to set the truth before the
unconverted, I might seek to benefit believers, I might
seek to relieve the distressed, I might in other ways seek
to behave myself as it becomes a child of God in this
world ; and yet, not being happy in the Lord, and not
being nourished and strengthened in my inner man day by
day, all this might not be attended to in a right spirit.
Before this time my practice had been, at least for ten
years previously, as an habitual thing to give myself to
prayer, after having dressed myself in the morning. JVbw,
I saw that the most important thing I had to do was to
give myself to the reading of the word of God, and to
meditation on it, that thus my heart might be comforted,
encouraged, warned, reproved, instructed j and that thus,
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 207
by means of the word of God, whilst meditating on it, my
heart might be brought into experimental communion with
the Lord.
I began therefore to meditate on the New Testament
from the beginning, early in the morning. The first thing
I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord's blessing
upon his precious word, was, to begin to meditate on the
word of God, searching as it were into every verse, to get
blessing out of it ; not for the sake of the public ministry
of the word, not for the sake of preaching on what I had
meditated upon, but for the sake of obtaining food for my
own soul. The result I have found to be almost invari-
ably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been
led to* confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or
to supplication ; so that, though I did not, as it were, give
myself to grayer, but to meditation, yet it turned almost
immediately more cr less into prayer. When thus I have
been for a while making confession, or intercession, or sup-
plication, or have given thanks, I go on to the next words
or verse, turning all, as I go on, into prayer for myself or
others, as the word may lead to it, but still continually
keeping before me that food for my own soul is the
object of my meditation. The result of this is, that there
is always a good deal of confession, thanksgiving, suppli-
cation, or intercession mingled with my meditation, ana
that my inner man almost invariably is even sensibly
nourished and strengthened, and that by breakfast time,
with rare exceptions, I am in a peaceful if not happy state
of heart. Thus also the Lord is pleased to communicate
unto me that which, either very soon after or at a later
time, I have found to become food for other believers,
though it was not for the sake of the public ministry of the
word that I gave myself to meditation, but for the profit
of my own inner man.
With this mode I have likewise combined the being out
206 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP.. XIIL
baron replied, " My dear young friend, I have learned it
from the Lord Jesus. I wish you would read through the
Gospel of John. Good night." The student now for the
first time in his life sat down and read the word of God in
a disposition of mind to be willing to learn, whilst up to
that time he had never read the Holy Scriptures but with
the view of wishing to find out arguments against them.
It pleased God to bless him. From that time he became
himself a follower of the Lord Jesus, and has been so ever
since.
May 7. It has recently pleased the Lord to teach me a
truth, irrespective of human instrumentality, as far as I
know, the benefit of which I have not lost, though now,
while preparing the fifth edition for the press, more than
fourteen years have since passed away. The point is this :
I saw more clearly than ever that the first great and pri-
mary business to which I ought to attend every day was, to
have my soul happy in the Lord. The first thing to be con-
cerned about was not how much I might serve the Lord,
how I might glorify the Lord ; but how I might get my
soul into a happy state, and how my inner man might be
nourished. For I might seek to set the truth before the
unconverted, I might seek to benefit believers, I might
seek to relieve the distressed, I might in other ways seek
to behave myself as it becomes a child of God in this
world ; and yet, not being happy in the Lord, and not
being nourished and strengthened in my inner man day by
day, all this might not be attended to in a right spirit.
Before this time my practice had been, at least for ten
years previously, as an habitual thing to give myself to
prayer, after having dressed myself in the morning. JVbwy
I saw that the most important thing I had to do was to
give myself to the reading of the word of God, and to
meditation on it, that thus my heart might be comforted,
encouraged, warned, reproved, instructed ; and that thus,
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 207
by means of the word of God, whilst meditating on it, my
heart might be brought into experimental communion with
the Lord.
I began therefore to meditate on the New Testament
from the beginning, early in the morning. The first thing
I did, after having asked in a few words the Lord's blessing
upon his precious word, was, to begin to meditate on the
word of God, searching as it were into every verse, to get
blessing out of it ; not for the sake of the public ministry
of the word, not for the sake of preaching on what I had
meditated upon, but for the sake of obtaining food for my
own soul. The result I have found to be almost invari-
ably this, that after a very few minutes my soul has been
led to' confession, or to thanksgiving, or to intercession, or
to supplication ; so that, though I did not, as it were, give
myself to prayer, but to meditation yet it turned almost
immediately more or less into prayer. When thus I have
been for a while making confession, or intercession, or sup-
plication, or have given thanks, I go on to the next words
or verse, turning all, as I go on, into prayer for myself or
others, as the word may lead to it, but still continually
keeping before me that food for my own soul is the
object of my meditation. The result of this is, that there
is always a good deal of confession, thanksgiving, suppli-
cation, or intercession mingled with my meditation, ana
that my inner man almost invariably is even sensibly
nourished and strengthened, and that by breakfast time,
with rare exceptions, I am in a peaceful if not happy state
of heart. Thus also the Lord is pleased to communicate
unto me that which, either very soon after or at a later
time, I have found to become food for other believers,
though it was not for the sake of the public ministry of tho
word that I gave myself to meditation, but for the profit
pf my own inner man.
With this mode I have likewise combined the being out
208 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XIII.
in the open air for an hour, an hour and a half, or two
hours, before breakfast, walking about in the fields, and in
the summer sitting for a little on the stiles, if I find it too
much to walk all the time. I find it very beneficial to my
health to walk thus for meditation before breakfast, and
am now so in the habit of using the lime for that purpose,
that when I get into the open air I generally take out a
New Testament of good-sized type, which I carry with
me for that purpose, besides my Bible ; and I find that I
can profitably spend my time in the open air, which for-
merly was not the case, for want of habit. I used to con-
sider the time spent in walking a loss, but now I find it
very profitable, not only to my body, but also to my soul.
The walking out before breakfast is of course not neces-
sarily connected with this matter, and every one has to
judge according to his strength and other circumstances.
The difference, then, between my former practice and
my present one is this : Formerly, when I rose, I began to
pray as soon as possible, and generally spent all my time
till breakfast in prayer, or almost all the time. At all
events I almost invariably began with prayer, except when
I felt my soul to be more than usually barren, in which
case I read the word of God for food, or for refreshment,
or for a revival and renewal of my inner man, before I
gave myself to prayer. But what was the result ? I often
spent a quarter of an hour, or half an hour, or even an
hour, on my knees, before being conscious to myself of
having derived comfort, encouragement, humbling of soul,
etc. ; and often, after having suffered much from wandering
of mind for the first ten minutes, or a quarter of an hour,
or even half an hour, I only then began really to pray. I
scarcely ever suffer now in this way. For my heart being
nourished by the truth, being brought into experimental
fellowship with God, I speak to my Father and to my
Friend (vile though I am, and unworthy of it) about the
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 209
things that he has brought before me in his precious word
It often now astonishes me that I did not sooner see this
point. In no book did I ever read about it. No public
ministry ever brought the matter before me. No private
intercourse with a brother stirred me up to this matter.
And yet now, since God has taught me this point, it is as
plain to me as anything, that the first thing the child of
God has to d^ -norning by morning is, to obtain food for
his inner man. As the outward man is not fit for work
for any length of time except we take food, and as this is
one of the first things we do in the morning, so it should
be with the inner man. We should take food for that, as
every one must allow. Now what is the food for the inner
man ? Not prayer, but the word of God; and here again,
not the simple reading of the word of God, so that it only
passes through our minds, just as water runs through a
pipe, but considering what we read, pondering over it, and
applying it to our hearts. When we pray, we speak to
God. Now, prayer, in order to be continued for any length
of time in any other than a formal manner, requires, gene-
rally speaking, a measure of strength or godly desire, and
the season, therefore, when this exercise of the soul can
6e most effectually performed is after the inner man has
been nourished by meditation on the word of God, where
we find our Father speaking to us, to encourage us, to
comfort us, to instruct us, to humble us, to reprove us.
We may therefore profitably meditate, with God's bless-
ing, though we are ever so weak spiritually ; nay, the
weaker- we are, the more we need meditation for the
strengthening of our inner man. There is thus far less to
be feared from wandering of mind than if we give our-
selves to prayer without having had previously time for
meditation. I dwell so particularly on this point because
of the immense spiritual profit and refreshment I am con«
scious of Laving derived from it myself, and I affection-
18*
£10 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CUAP. XIH
ately and solemnly beseech all my fellow-believers to
ponder this matter. By the blessing of God I ascribe to
this mode the help and strength which I have had from
God to pass in peace through deeper trials, in various ways,
than I had ever had before ; and after having now above
fourteen years tried this way, I can most fully, in the fear
of God, commend it. In addition to this I generally read,
after family prayer, larger portions of the word of God,
when I still pursue my practice of reading regularly on-
ward in the Holy Scriptures, sometimes in the New Testa-
ment and sometimes in the Old, and for more than twenty-
six years I have proved the blessedness of it. I take, also,
either then or at other parts of the day, time more
especially for prayer.
How different, when the soul is refreshed and made
happy early in the morning, from what it is when, without
spiritual preparation, the service, the trials, and the temp-
tations of the day come upon one !
Oct. 1. When I had again not one penny in hand for
the necessities of this day, there was brought to me this
morning ten shillings for the orphans, which had been sent
from Kensington. In the paper which contained the
money, was written : " Your Heavenly Father knoweth
that ye have need of these things." " Trust in the Lord."
This word of our Lord is to me of more value than many
bank notes. About five minutes later I received from an
Irish sister ten pounds, through her banker in London.
I mention here, as a point particularly to be noticed, that
after the season of comparative abundance had come to an
end in September, the Lord did not at once allow us to be
so sharply tried as we were afterwards. He dealt in the
same gentle way with us three years before, when the trials
of faith in this part of the work first commenced.
Nov. 2. At a time of the greatest poverty one pound
was sent by a lady from Birmingham. About half an hour
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 211
afterwards I received ten pounds from a brother who had
saved up one hundred and fifty pounds, and put it into a
savings bank, but who now sees that to devote this money
to the promotion of the work of God tends more to the
glory of the name of Jesus than to retain it in the savings
bank upon interest for a time of sickness or old age ; for
he is assured that should such times come, the same Lord,
who has hitherto cared for him whilst in health and strength
and able to work, will also care for him then. The same
brother gave me three pounds a fortnight since. This ten
pounds came in very seasonably ; for, though we had
been able to provide for the absolute necessities of to-day,
yet there was want in many respects, especially as a boy
is just going out as an apprentice, who needs tools and
an outfit.
Nov. 13. Saturday. This morning I took one shil-
ling out of the box in my house. This shilling was all
there was towards the need of to-day. Pause, dear reader,
for a few moments ! Consider that there are more than a
hundred persons to be provided with everything they re-
quire ; consider that there is no money in hand ; and con-
sider also that this is the case not once nor twice in the
course of the year, but very frequently. Is it not precious,
under such circumstances, to have the living God as a
father to go to, who is ever able and ever willing to help,
as it may be really needed ? And to this privilege every
one has a title who believes in the Lord Jesus, being as
such a child of God. Galatians iii. 26. For though all
believers in the Lord Jesus are not called upon to establish
orphan houses, schools for poor children, etc., and trust in
God for means ; yet all believers, according to the will of
God concerning them in Christ Jesus, may cast, and ought
to cast, all their care upon him who careth for them, and
need not be anxiously concerned about anything, as is
plainly to be seen from 1 Peter v. 7, Philippians iv. 6, Mat
\
212 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIII.
thew vi. 25-34. Under these circumstances of need, a
silver watch, which only yesterday afternoon had become
the property of the orphan fund, was disposed of, whereby
we were helped through the expenses of to-day. The coals
are almost gone in each of the houses. Every article of
provision, etc., is likewise much reduced. Truly, we are
exceedingly poor ; nevertheless there are the necessary pro-
visions till Monday morning, and thus we are brought to
the close of another week. This afternoon all the labor-
ers met for prayer.
Nov. 14. When we met again this afternoon for prayer,
we had reason to praise, for the Lord had sent in means.
This morning was given to me five pounds, and six shillings
had come in by sale of articles.
Nov. 15. Last Friday brother Craik and I had a meeting
for inquirers and candidates for fellowship. We saw eight,
and had to send away ten whom we could not see, our
strength being quite gone after we had seen the eight, one
after another. This evening we saw seven, and had to send
away three.
Nov. 16. The last four days we have daily met for prayer,
there being no means to pay the teachers in the day
schools. Besides this, we need a stove in one of the
school-rooms ; also some Bibles and tracts. To-day I re-
ceived two pounds from a brother at Exmouth.
Dec. 9. We are now brought to the close of the sixth
year of this part of the work, having only in hand the
money which has been put by for the rent ; but during the
whole of this year we have been supplied with all that
was needed.
During the last three years we had closed the accounts
on this day, and had, a few days after, some public meet-
ings, at which, for the benefit of the hearers, we stated how
the Lord had dealt with us during the year, and the sub-
stance of what had been stated at those meetings was after-
1841. FAITH STRENGTHENED BY EXERCISE. 213
wards printed for the benefit of the church at targe. This
time, however, it appeared to us better to delay for a whila
both the public meetings and the publishing of the Report
Through grace we had learned to lean upon the Lord only,
being assured that if we never were to speak or write one
single word more about this work, yet should we be sup-
plied with means, as long as he should enable us to depend
on himself alone. But whilst we neither had had those
public meetings for the purpose of exposing our necessity,
nor had had the account of the Lord's dealings with us pub-
lished for the sake of working thereby upon the feelings of
the readers, and thus inducing them to give money, but
only that we might by our experience benefit other saints ;
yet it might have appeared to some that in making known
our circumstances we were actuated by some such motives.
What better proof, therefore, could we give of our depend-
ing upon the living God alone, and not upon public meet-
ings or printed reports, than that, in the midst of OUT deep
poverty, instead of being glad for the time to have come
when we could make known our circumstances, we still
went on quietly for some time longer, without saying any-
thing. We therefore determined, as we sought and still
seek in this work to act for the profit of the saints gen-
erally, to delay both the public meetings and the Reports
for a few months. Naturally we should have been, of
course, as glad as any one to have exposed our poverty at
that time ; but spiritually we were enabled to delight even
then in the prospect of the increased benefit that might b«
derived by the church at large from our acting ^s we did.
CHAPTER XIV.
WALKING IN DARKNESS.
1841 — 1842.
"GOD'S WAT LEADS INTO TRIAL" — GROUNDS OF THANKFULNESS— PBO-
TRACTED DARKNESS — CAST DOWN, BUT NOT DESTROYED — TRUST IN
GOD COMMENDED— THE MEANS OF ITS ATTAINMENT — REVIEW OF THB
WORK.
DECEMBER 15, 1841. From Nov. 12 to this day my
fellow-laborers in the church and I have seen thirty inquir-
ers and candidates for fellowship, and some of them we
have seen repeatedly. How can we sufficiently praise the
Lord for still continuing to use us in his service?
Dec. 18. Saturday morning. There is now the great-
est need, and only fourpence in hand, which I found in
the box at my house ; yet I fully believe the Lord will
supply us this day also with all that is required. — Pause a
tew moments, dear reader. Observe two things. We
acted for God in delaying the public meetings and the
publishing of the Report ; but God's way leads always into
trial, so far as sight and sense are concerned. Nature
Always will be tried in God's ways. The Lord was saying
by this poverty, " I will now see whether you truly lean
upon me, and whether you truly look to me." Of all the
seasons that I had ever passed through since I had been
Diving in this way, up to that time, T never knew any
1841. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 215
period in which my faith was tried so sharply as during
the four months from December 12, 1841, to April 12,
1842. But observe further : We might even now have
altered our minds with respect to the public meetings
and publishing the Report ; for no one knew our determi*
nation, at this time, concerning this point. Nay, on the
contrary, we knew with what delight very many children
of God were looking forward to receive further accounts.
But the Lord kept us steadfast to the conclusion at which
we arrived under his guidance. — Now to return to
Saturday, Dec. 18. Evening. The Lord has been very
kind to us this day. In the course of the morning six
shillings came in. We had thus, with what provisions there
were in hand, all that was needed for the dinner, but no
means to provide for the next meal in the afternoon. A
few minutes after the laborers had met together for prayer
this morning, there was given to one of them a sovereign
for himself. By means of this all that was needed for tea
could be procured. When we again met in the evening for
prayer, we found that the supplies amounted to two pounds
eight shillings twopence, enough for all that was required
to-day. But one thing more is to be noticed respect-
ing this day. I was informed that three more of the
orphans have been recently brought to the knowledge
of the truth. We have now been meeting daily for prayer
during the last five weeks, and thus the Lord has not
merely heard our prayers respecting the funds, but has also
blessed these children.
Dec. 23. This is now the sixth week that the labor-
ers in the day schools and Orphan Houses have daily met
for prayer. Several precious answers we have already
received since we began to meet, as it regards pecuniary
supplies, fresh instances of conversion among the children,
etc. One of our petitions has been that the Lord would
be pleased to furnish us with means for a stove at Callow*
216 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
hill Street schoolroom. But, though we had often men-
tioned this matter before the Lord, he seemed not to
regard our request. Yesterday afternoon, while walking
in my little garden, and meditating and praying, I had an
unusual assurance that the time was now come when the
Lord would answer our request, which arose partly from
my being able to believe that he would send the means,
and partly from the fact that the answer could no longer
be delayed without prayer having failed in this matter,
as we could not assemble the children again, after the
Christmas vacation, without there being a stove put up.
And now, dear reader, observe : This morning I received
from A. B. twenty pounds, and we have thus much more
than is required for a stove.
REVIEW OF THE TEAR 1841.
1. In reading over my journal, I find that the Lord
has given me, during this year, many precious answers to
prayer, in addition to those which have been recorded in
the previous part of the Narrative. I mention the follow-
ing for the encouragement of the reader: 1. One of the
orphan boys needed to be apprenticed. I knew of no
suitable believing master who would take an in-door ap-
prentice. I gave myself to prayer, and brought the matter
daily before the Lord. I marked it down among the sub-
jects for which I would daily ask the Lord ; and at last,
though from May 21 to September I had to pray about
the matter, the Lord granted my request ; for in Septem-
ber I found a suitable place for him. 2. On May 23 I be-
gan to ask the Lord that he would be pleased to deliver a
certain sister in the Lord from the great spiritual depression
under which she was suffering, and after three days the
Lord granted me my request. 3. On June 151 began to
ask the Lord to deliver a brother at a distance from the
1841. WALKING IN DAEKNESS. 217
great spiritual nervousness in which he found himself shut
up, which not only distressed him exceedingly, and in a
great measure hindered him in his service towards the
world and the church, but which in consequence was also
a trial to the saints who knew and valued this dear brother.
This petition I brought many times before the Lord. The
year passed away, and it was not granted. But yet at last
this request also has been granted to me and to the many
dear saints who I know prayed for this dear brother ; for
though he was for some years in this state, it is now [in
1845] two years and more since he has been quite restored.
4. On June 15 I also began to ask the Lord daily in -his
mercy to keep a sister in the Lord from insanity, who was
then apparently on the very border of it ; and I have now
[in 1845] to record to his praise, after nearly four years
have passed away, that the Lord has kept her from it. 5.
During this year I was informed about the conversion of
one of the very greatest sinners that I had ever heard of
in all my service for the Lord. Repeatedly I fell on my
knees with his wife, and asked the Lord for his conversion,
when she came to me in the deepest distress of soul, on
account of her most barbarous and cruel treatment that she
received from him in his bitter enmity against her for the
Lord's sake, and because he could not provoke her to be in
a passion, and she would not strike him again, and the like.
At the time when it was at its worst I pleaded especially
on his behalf the promise in Matthew xviii. 19 : "Again I
say unto you, that if two of you shall agree on earth as
touching anything that they shall ask, it shall be done for
them of my Father which is in heaven." And now this
awful persecutor is converted. 6. On May 25 I began to
ask the Lord for greater real spiritual prosperity among the
saints among whom I labor in Bristol than there ever yet
had been among them ; and now I have to record to the
praise of the Lord that truly he has answered this request j
19
218 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
for, considering all things, at no period has there been
more manifestation of grace, and truth, and spiritual power
among us, than there is now while I am writing this for
the press [1845].
2. The state of the church with reference to numbers.
There are 572 at present in communion, 88 having been
added during the past year, of whom 30 have been brought
to the knowledge of the Lord among us.
3. The Lord's goodness as to my temporal supplies dur-
ing this year. He has been pleased to give me by freewill
offerings of the saints, £238, 11s. lid.
January 3, 1842. This evening we had a precious public
prayer meeting. When the usual time for closing the
meeting came, it appeared to me that there was a desire
.to continue to wait upon the Lord. I therefore proposed
to the brethren that those who had bodily strength, time,
and a desire for waiting still longer upon the Lord, would
do so. At least thirty remained, and we continued till
after ten in prayer, whilst several brethren prayed. I
never knew prayer more really in the Spirit. I experienced
for myself unusual nearness to the Lord, and was enabled
to ask in faith, nothing doubting.
Jan. 4. As we have often found it to be the case, so it
is now. After a season of more than usual poverty, comes
a time of more than usual abundance. To-day the same
brother who has been spoken of under November 2, and
who has drawn his money out of the savings bank to spend
it for the Lord, sent twenty pounds more of it. There
came in also from Guernsey one pound, and one pound
seven shillings besides. I am now able to order oatmeal
from Scotland, buy materials for the boys' clothes, order
shoes, etc. Thus the Lord has been pleased to answer all
our requests with respect to the pecuniary necessities of the
orphans, which we have brought before him in our prayer
meetings during tlje last seven weeks. We have thus had
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 219
of late an abundance, but the expenses have been great
also ; for within the last twenty-five days I have paid out
above one hundred pounds.
Feb. 5. Saturday. As only ten pounds ten shillings
sixpence had been received since January 29, i. e. only
so much as day by day was needed to provide neces-
saries for the orphans, there is again the greatest need. It
is now twelve o'clock, and there are no means as yet to
meet the expenses of to-day. The words in the prayer of
Jehoshaphat, " Neither know we what to do, but our eyes
are upon thee," are at this moment the language of my
heart. I likewise know not what to do, but my eyes are
upon the Lord, and I am sure that he will help this day
also. — Evening. In the course of the morning came in,
by sale of articles, twelve shillings. We were able like-
wise to dispose of one of the articles which were sent last
evening for five shillings. This afternoon one of the
laborers gave me ten shillings, and three shillings came in
for needlework. By means of this one pound ten shillings
we were able to supply all that was needed.
Feb. 8. By what came in yesterday and the day before,
the need of yesterday was supplied, and there is enough
in all the houses for the meals of to-day ; but in none of
the houses have we been able to take in any bread ; ana
as yesterday also but little could be taken in, there will
not remain any for to-morrow ; nor is there money enough
to take in milk to-morrow morning. There are likewise
coals needed in two houses. Indeed, so far as I know,
these three years and seven months, since first the funds
were exhausted, we were never in greater poverty ; and if
the Lord were not to send means before nine o'clock to-
morrow morning, his name would be dishonored. But I
am fully assured that he will not leave us. — Evening.
The Lord has not yet been pleased to send us what is
needed for to-morrow, but he has given us a fresh proof
220 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
that he is mindful of us. Between four and five o'clock
this afternoon were sent nine plum cakes, which a sister
had ordered to be baked as a treat for the orphans.
These cakes were an encouragement to me to continue to
look out for further supplies. There was also found in the
boxes at the Orphan Houses two shillings and a penny
halfpenny, and one shilling fourpence came in for stockings.
These little donations are most precious, but they are not
enough to meet the need of to-morrow ; yea, before nine
o'clock to-morrow morning we need more money to be
able to take in the milk. Truly, we are poorer than ever ;
but through grace my eyes look not at the empty stores
and the empty purse, but to the riches of the Lord only.
Feb. 9. This morning I went between seven and eight
o'clock to the Orphan Houses, to see whether the Lord
had sent in anything. When I arrived there, he had just
two or three minutes before sent help. A brother, in going
to his house of business this morning, had gone already
about half a mile, when the Lord was pleased to lay the
orphans upon his heart. He said, however, to himself, I
cannot well return now, but will take something this
evening ; and thus he walked on. Nevertheless, he could
not go on any further, but felt himself constrained to go
back, and to take to brother R. B., at the Boys' Orphan
House, three sovereigns. [The donor himself stated this
to me afterwards.] Thus the Lord in his faithfulness
helped us. Help was never more truly needed, for our
poverty was never greater ; nor did the help of the Lord
ever come more manifestly from himself; for the brother
was gone on a good distance, it was between seven and
eight o^clock in the morning, and it was so short a time
before money would have been needed. Consider this, be-
loved reader, and with us praise the Lord for his goodness.
Praise him particularly that he enabled us to trust in him
184*. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 221
in this trying hour. There came in besides, to-day, seven
shillings sixpence.
Feb. 12. Saturday. Never since the funds were for
the first time exhausted had there come in less during any
week than during this. We were only able to supply the
absolute necessities; but this we were enabled to do.
"When the meal-times came, the Lord always provided
what was needful, and, considering the great distress there
is now almost everywhere, our dear orphans are very well
provided for. Now this day began not only without there
being anything in hand, but our stores were greatly
reduced, and we had to procure provisions for two days.
One of the laborers gave five shillings in the morning, to
provide the means to take in the milk. I collected together
some pamphlets, which had been given for sale, to dispose
of them, and they were sold about eleven o'clock for four
shillings. There came in also by sale of stockings three shil-
lings, and twelve shillings was paid on behalf of one of the
orphans. Thus, we were provided with means to procure
a dinner, and had a little towards purchasing bread, but
by no means enough. All the laborers were together in
prayer from half-past eleven till one, and we separated
comfortably, with the purpose of meeting again in the even-
ing. When I came home there was given to me an old
broken silver pencil-case, which, though worth very little,
I took as a fresh proof that our Father was mindful of our
need. When we met again this evening, we found that
three shillings sixpence had come in by sale of stockings,
and sixpence for two Reports. As all this was not enough,
a few old and needless articles were disposed of for four
shillings, also the broken pencil-case for sixpence. I say
needless articles, for other articles it did not seem right to
us to dispose of, in order that the Lord's own deliverance
might be manifest. A laborer was also still further able
to give seven shillings of his own. To one of the laborers
19*
222 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
two shillings had been owed by a certain individual for
more than a twelvemonth, which being paid just now, and
given by him for the orphans, came in most seasonably.
Thus we had one pound eighteen shillings sixpence, as
much as was needful to procure provisions till after break-
fast on Monday morning. However, the Lord helped still
further. Between eight and nine this evening, after we
had been together for prayer, and had now separated,
some money was given to one of the laborers for himself,
by which means he was able to give nine shillings, so that
altogether two pounds seven shillings sixpence had come
in this day. This has been, of all the weeks, during the
last three years and seven months, one of the most trying,
so far as it regards the trial of faith. Thanks to the Lord
who has helped us this day also ! Thanks to him for en-
abling us already this morning, when we met for prayer, to
praise him for the deliverance which we were sure he would
work.
Feb. 16. This morning there was now again only suffi-
cient money in hand to take in milk at two of the houses ;
but as a laborer was able to give six shillings sixpence, we
had sufficient for the milk, and had also enough, with the
provisions that were in the houses, to provide for the din-
ner. Nothing more came in in the course of the morningr
nor was I able to make inquiries how matters stood. In
the afternoon, between three and four o'clock, having once
more besought the Lord to send us help, I sat peacefully
down to give myself to meditation over the word, consid-
ering that that was now my service, though I knew not
whether there was a morsel of bread for tea m any one of
the houses, but being assured that the Lord would provide.
For, . through grace, my mind is so fully assured of the
faithfulness of the Lord, that, in the midst of the greatest
need, I am enabled in peace to go about my other work.
Indeed, did not the Lord give me this, which is the result
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 225
of trusting in him, I should scarcely be able i/o work at
all ; for it is now comparatively a rare thing that a day
comes when I am not in need for one or the other part of
the work. Scarcely had I sat down to meditate, when a
note was sent to me from the Orphan Houses, in which
brother R. B., master of the orphan boys, had written
thus : " On visiting the sisters in the Infant and Girls' Or-
phan Houses, I found them in the greatest need. There
was not bread in one of the houses for tea this evening,
and the six shillings sixpence was scarcely enough to
supply what was needed for the dinner. I therefore opened
the box in the Boys' Orphan House, and most unexpect-
edly found one pound it. Thus, through the kincjness of
the Lord, we were again abundantly supplied as it regards
present necessities." In the evening the Lord, in his love
and faithfulness, stretched out his hand still further. I had
expounded at the meeting a part of John xi. The last
words on which I spoke were, " Said I not unto thee that
if thou wouldest believe thou shouldest see the glory of
God?" When the meeting was over, as a fresh proof of
the truth of this word, a note was given to me in which a
sick sister sent me five pounds for the orphans.
Feb. 19. Saturday. Our means were now again com-
pletely spent. Our provision stores were, perhaps, even
more exhausted than on any previous Saturday. There
was not the least human likelihood of obtaining means
for sufficient provisions for this one day, and much
less for two days. When I went before breakfast to the
Orphan Houses, I found a letter from Nottingham, contain-
ing one shilling, which had arrived last evening. This
was not only a sweet proof that our Father remembered
our need, but it was also like an earnest that he would
supply us this day also with all we required. In the
course of the morning came in by sale of stockings four
shillings elevenpence. In the box at my house I found
224 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
one shilling. One of the laborers gave four shillings
tenpence. Thus we were provided with those things
which were absolutely needed for this day. We met
between eleven and twelve o'clock for prayer. When we
met again in the evening, a second letter had arrived from
Nottingham, with another shilling. This was a further
sweet proof of our Father's loving remembrance of our
need ; but with all this we were still without any means to
provide bread for to-morrow, the Lord's day. At eight
o'clock I separated from my fellowVlaborers, as I expected
brother R. C. to arrive a little after eight at my house. I
therefore requested one of the brethren to go with me, in
order to take back to the Orphan Houses what the Lord
might send in by post or in any other way. It was now
half past eight in the evening, and there was no bread yet
in any one of the three houses for to-morrow. A few
moments after, brother C. arrived, and he had not been
more than about five minutes in my house when he gave
me half a sovereign which he brought for the orphans. I
soon found an opportunity to leave the room for a little,
gave the ten shillings to the brother whom I had brought
with me from the Orphan Houses, and who was waiting in
another room; and thus between nine and ten o'clock
sufficient bread could be bought. Observe ! For the trial
of our faith the Lord had allowed us to be kept waiting
so long. When, however, brother C. had arrived, having
money for the orphans, he could not delay giving it at
once, a matter most worthy of notice. This has been a
week full of trials of faith, but also full of deliverances.
Feb. 21. Since Saturday evening came in one pound
eight shillings elevenpence. There was also sent from
Plymouth a piece of blond, a piece of quilling net, and
eleven pairs of children's stockings, for sale. Thus we
were supplied with means for that which was requisite for
the beginning of this day ; but, as our stores had been so
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 225
reduced at the end of last week, there was not enough for
tea this afternoon. Four o'clock had now come, one hour
before the usual tea-time, when a brother from Somerset-
shire came to see the Orphan Houses, and put a sovereign
into each of the boxes. Our great need soon brought out
the money, and thus we were supplied. [Observe ! The
brother, as he himself told me a few days after in the
course of conversation, had but little time, and therefore
rather hastily went over the houses. Had he stayed long
and conversed much, as might have been the case, his
donations would not have been in time for the tea.]
There came in one shilling besides, by needlework done
by the children.
Feb. 25. Greater than now our need had never been.
Our trials of faith have never been so sharp as during
this week. Indeed, so much so, that most of the
laborers felt to-day considerably tried. Yet neither this
day has the Lord suffered us to be confounded. Through
a remarkable circumstance one of the laborers obtained
some money this morning, so that all the need of to-clay
could be amply met.
Feb. 26. My prayer this morning was in particular
that the Lord would be pleased now to look in pity upon
us, and take off his hand. Indeed, for several days my
prayer has been that he would enable us to continue to
trust in him, and not lay more upon us than he would
enable us to bear. This is now again Saturday. There
having been given yesterday a rich supply to the matrons,
I knew that not so much as usual would be required this
Saturday; still, I thought that one pound ten shillings
would be needed. Between ten and eleven o'clock this
morning a parcel came from Clapham, containing two
pounds two shillings, with two frocks, two petticoats, two
chemises, two pinafores, and six handkerchiefs, all
226 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XIV
Thus we were richly supplied for to-day, for only one
pound ten shillings was needed.
March 2. This evening were sent, by order of an Irish
sister, thirty-three and a half pounds of woollen yarn. Re-
specting this donation it is to be remarked that last Satur-
day we had asked the Lord, in our prayer meeting, that he
would be pleased to send us means to purchase worsted,
in order that the boys might go on with their knitting.
March 9. At a time of the greatest need, both with
regard to the day schools and the orphans, so much so that
we could not have gone on any longer without help, I
received this day ten pounds from a brother who lives near
Dublin. The money was divided between the day schools
and the Orphan Houses. The following little circumstance
is to be noticed respecting this donation. As our need was
so great, and my soul was, through grace, truly waiting
upon the Lord, I looked out for supplies in the course of
this morning. The post, however, was out, and no supplies
had come. This did not in the least discourage me. I
said to myself, the Lord can send means without the post,
or even now, though the post is out, by this very delivery
of letters he may have sent means, though the money is
not yet in my hands. It was not long after I had thus
spoken to myself when, according to my hope in God, we
were helped ; for the brother who sent us the ten pounds,
had this time directed his letter to the Boys' Orphan
House, whence it was sent to me.
March 17. From the 12th to the IGth had come in four
pounds five shillings elevenpence halfpenny for the orphans.
This morning our poverty, which now has lasted more or
less for several months, had become exceedingly great. I
lelt my house a few minutes after seven to go to the
Orphan Houses to see whether there was money enough
to f ake in the milk, which is brought about eight o'clock.
On my way it was especially niy request that the Lord
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 22?
would be pleased to pity us, even as a lather pitietli his
children, and that he would not lay more upon us than he
would enable us to bear. I especially entreated him that
he would now be pleased to refresh our hearts by sending
us help. I likewise reminded him of the consequences
that would result, both in reference to believers and unbe-
lievers, if we should have to give up the work because of
want of means, and that he therefore would not permit its
coming to nought. I moreover again confessed before the
Lord that I deserved not that he should continue to use
me in this work any longer. While I was thus in prayer,
about two minutes' walk from the Orphan Houses, I met a
brother who was going at this early hour to his business.
After having exchanged a few words with him, I went on ;
but he presently ran after me, and gave me one pound for
the orphans. Thus the Lord speedily answered my prayer.
Truly, it is worth being poor and greatly tried in faith for
the sake of having day by day such precious proofs of the
loving interest which our kind Father takes in everything
that concerns us. And how should our Father do other-
wise? He that has given us the greatest possible proof
of his love which he could have done, in giving us his own
Son, surely he will with him also freely give us all things.
It is worth also being poor and greatly tried in faith, if
but thereby the hearts of the children of God may be
comforted and their faith strengthened, and if but those
who do not know God, and who may read or hear of his
dealings with us, should be led thereby to see that faith in
God is more than a mere notion, and that there is indeed
reality in Christianity. In the course of this day there
came in still further thirteen shillings.
March 19. Saturday. As it has often been the case on
Saturdays, so it was this day in particular. We began the
day in very great poverty, as only seven shillings had come
in since the day before yesterday. There was not one ray
228 THE LIFE OF TEUSI. CHAP. XIV.
of light as to natural prospects. The heart would be over-
whelmed at such seasons, were there not an abundance of
repose to be found by trusting in God. The trial having
continued so long, and our poverty having now come to
such a degree that it was necessary we should have help
in order that the name of the Lord might not be dishon-
ored, I had proposed to my fellow-laborers that we should
set apart this day especially for prayer. We met accord-
ingly at half past ten in the morning. By that time had
come in four shillings sixpence, seven shillings sixpence,
and ten shillings. In the afternoon we met again at three,
when ten shillings came in. In the evening, at seven, we
met once more, there being yet about three shillings
needed to provide all that was required. This also we
received, and even three shillings more than was actually
needed came in, just when we were about to separate.
April 9. Saturday. Only one shilling sixpence had
come in since yesterday afternoon. We needed more
money than there was in hand, especially as it was Saturday,
but the Lord was pleased particularly to try our faith. In
the course of the morning came from some sisters in Dub-
lin, eighteen yards of calico, thirty-four yards of print,
forty-three balls of cotton, and a pair of worn lady's boots.
This donation came most seasonably, as we had been men-
tioning repeatedly the need of calico and print in our
prayers, and the sewing-cotton and the pair of boots came
at once into use. Moreover, this donation was a sweet
encouragement to me to continue waiting upon the Lord.
Evening was now approaching, and no money had yet come
in for provisions, etc., which would be needed on the
Lord's day. About six o'clock, I gave myself once more to
prayer with my wife, and requested the Lord in my prayer
that if the sister who in love to him has taken upon her
the service of disposing of the articles which are given for
sale had any money ID hand, he would . be pleased to
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 229
incline her heart to bring or send the money this evening.
After this I sat down peacefully to read the Scriptures,
being assured that this time also the Lord would stretch
out his hand on our behalf. About half past seven o'clock,
the sister, to whom reference has just now been made, came
and brought one pound ten shillings fourpence for articles
which she had sold, stating that, though she was unwell,
yet she felt herself constrained not to delay bringing this
money. Thus we had all that was needed, and six shillings
more. When I arrived with the money at the Infant
Orphan House, about eight o'clock, I found my fellow-
laborers in prayer, and while we still continued in prayer
a sister sent a large basket of stale bread, being five brown
loaves, seven bread cakes, and five French loaves.
April 12. We were never in greater need than to-day,
perhaps never in so much, when I received this morning
one hundred pounds from the East Indies. It is impossible
to describe the real joy in God it gave me. My prayer
had been again this morning particularly that our Father
would pity us, and now at last send larger sums. I was
not in the least surprised or excited when this donation
came, for I took it as that which came in answer to prayer,
and had been long looked for.
May 6. Only three pounds ten shillings twopence
halfpenny had been received since the 2d, on which ac-
count there would have been only enough means in hand
to provide for the breakfast to-morrow morning, when in
this our fresh need we received eighty-six pounds, two pair
of gold earrings, a brooch, and two rupees.
May 10. To-day, in closing the accounts, we have left,
at the end of this period of seventeen months, in which
we have been so often penniless, the sum of sixteen
pounds eighteen shillings tenpence halfpenny for the
orphans, and forty-eight pounds twelve shillings five and
20
230 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV
one fourth pence for the other objects of the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution.
The time now seemed to us to have come, when, for the
profit of the church at large, the Lord's dealings with us,
with reference to the various objects of the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution, should be made known by publish-
ing another Report. For, whilst we, on purpose, had
delayed it at this time five months longer than during the
previous years, and that during a period when we were
in deeper poverty than during any previous time ; yet, as
from the commencement it had appeared to me important
from time to time to make known the Lord's dealings with
us, so I judged it profitable still to seek to comfort, to
encourage, to exhort, to instruct, and to warn the dear
children of God by the printed accounts of the Lord's
goodness to us.
Though our trials of faith during these seventeen
months lasted longer and were sharper than during any
previous period, yet during all this time the orphans had
everything that was needful in the way of nourishing
food, the necessary articles of clothing, etc. Indeed, I
should rather at once send the children back to their rela-
tions than keep them without sufficient maintenance.
I desire that all the children of God who may read
these details may thereby be led to increased and more
simple confidence in God for everything which they may
need under any circumstances, and that these many
answers to prayer may encourage them to pray, particu-
larly as it regards the conversion of their friends and rela-
tions, their own progress in grace and knowledge, the state
of the saints whom they may know personally, the state
of the church of Christ at large, and the success of the
preaching of the gospel. Especially, I affectionately warn
them against being led away by the device of Satan, to
think that these things are peculiar to me, and cannot bo
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 231
enjoyed by all the children of God ; for though, as has
been stated before, every believer is not called upon to
establish orphan houses, charity schools, etc., and trust in
the Lord for means, yet all believers are called upon, in
She simple confidence of faith, to cast all their burdens upon
him, to trust in him for everything, and not only to make
everything a subject of prayer, but to expect answers to
their petitions which they have asked according to his wilj
and in the name of the Lord Jesus. Think not, dear
Deader, that I have the gift of faith, that is, that gift of
which we read in 1 Cor. xii. 9, and which is mentioned
along with " the gifts of healing," " the working of mira-
cles," " prophecy," and that on that account I am able to
trust in the Lord. It is true that the faith which I am
enabled to exercise is altogether God's own gift ; it is true
that he alone supports it, and that he alone can increase
it ; it is true that moment by moment, I depend on him
for it, and that if I were only one moment left to myself
my faitli would utterly fail; but it is not true that my
faith is that gift of faith which is spoken of in 1 Cor. xii. 9.
It is the self-same faith which is found in every believer,
and the growth of which I am most sensible of to myself;
for by little and little it has been increasing for the last
six and twenty years.
This faith which is exercised respecting the Orphan
Houses, and my own temporal necessities shows itself in
the same measure, for instance, concerning the following
points : I have never been permitted to doubt during the
last twenty-seven years that my sins are forgiven, that I
am a child of God, that I am beloved of God, and that I
shall be finally saved ; because I am enabled by the grace
of God to exercise faith upon the word of God, and be-
lieve what God says in those passages which settle these
matters (1 John v. 1 ; Gal. iii. 26 ; Acts x. 43 ; Romans
x. 9, 10 ; John iii. 16, etc.). Further, at the time when J
232 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
thought I should be insane, though there was not the least
ground for thinking so, I was in peace ; because my soul
believed the truth of that word, " We know that all things
work together for good to them that love God." Horn.
via. '28. Further : When my brother in the flesh and my
dear aged father died, and when concerning both of them
I had no evidence whatever that they were saved (though
I dare not say that they are lost, for I know it not), yet
my soul was at peace, perfectly at peace, under this great
trial, this exceedingly great trial, this trial which is one of
the greatest perhaps which can befall a believer. And what
was it that gave me peace ? My soul laid hold on that
word, " Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right ? "
This word, together with the whole character of God, as
he has revealed himself in his holy word, settled all ques-
tionings. I believed what he has said concerning himself,
and I was at peace, and have been at peace ever since,
concerning this matter. Further : When the Lord took
from me a beloved infant, my soul was at peace, perfectly
at peace; I could only weep tears of joy when I did weep.
And why ? Because my soul laid hold in faith on that
word, "Of such is the kingdom of heaven." Matthew
xix. 14. Further : When sometimes all has been dark,
exceedingly dark, with reference to my service among the
saints, judging from natural appearances; yea, when I
should have been overwhelmed indeed in grief and de-
spair had I looked at things after the outward appearance :
at such times I have sought to encourage myself in God,
by laying hold in faith on his almighty power, his un-
changeable love, and his infinite wisdom, and I have said
to myself, God is able and willing to deliver me, if it be
good for me ; for it is written, " lie that spared not his own
Son, but delivered him up for us all, how shall he not with
him also freely give us all things?" Rom. viii. 32. This
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 233
it was which, being believed by me through grace, kept my
soul in peace. Further: When in connection, with the
Orphan Houses, clay schools, etc., trials have come upon
me which were far heavier than the want of means, when
lying reports were spread that the orphans had not enough
to eat, or that they were cruelly treated in other respects,
and the like ; or when other trials, still greater, but which
I cannot mention, have befallen me in connection with
this work, and that at a time when I was nearly a thousand
miles absent from Bristol, and had to remain absent week
after week ; at such times my soul was stayed upon* God ;
I believed his word of promise which was applicable to
such cases ; I poured out my soul before God, and arose
from my knees in peace, because the trouble that was in
the soul was in believing prayer cast upon God, and thus 1
was kept in peace, though I saw it to be the will of God
to remain far away from the work. Further : When I
needed houses, fellow-laborers, masters and mistresses for
the orphans or for the day schools, I have been enabled to
look for all to the Lord, and trust in him for help.
Dear reader, I may seem to boast ; but, by the grace of
God, I do not boast in thus speaking. From my inmost
soul I do ascribe it to God alone that he has enabled me
to trust in him, and that hitherto he has not suffered my
confidence in him to fail. But I thought it needful to
make these remarks, lest any one should think that my
depending upon God was a particular gift given to DIP*
which other saints have no right to look for ; or lest it
should be thought that this my depending upon him had
only to do with the obtaining of MONEY ~by prayer and
faith. By the grace of God I desire that my faith in God
should extend towards EVERYTHING, the smallest of my
own temporal and spiritual concerns, and the smallest of
the temporal and spiritual concerns of my family, to-
wards the saints among whom I labor, the church at
20*
234 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
large, everything that has to do with the temporal and
spiritual prosperity of the Scriptural Knowledge Insti-
tution, etc. Dear reader, do not think that I have
attained in faith (and how much less in other respects!)
to that degree to which I might and ought to attain ; but
thank God for the faith which he has given me, and ask
him to uphold and increase it. And lastly, once more, let
not Satan deceive you in making you think that you could
not have the same faith, but that it is only for persons
who are situated as I am. When I lose such a thing aa
a key, I ask the Lord to direct me to it, and I look for an
answer to my prayer ; when a person with whom I have
made an appointment does not come, according to the fixed
time, and I begin to be inconvenienced by it, I ask the
Lord to be pleased to hasten him to me, and I look for an
answer ; when I do not understand a passage of the word
of God, I lift up my heart to the Lord, that he would be
pleased, by his Holy Spirit, to instruct me, and I expect to
be taught, though I do not fix the time when, and the
manner how it should be ; when I am going to minister
in the word, I seek help from the Lord, and while I, in
the consciousness of natural inability as well as utter tin-
worthiness, begin this his service, I am not cast down, but
of good cheer, because I look for his assistance, and believe
that he, for his dear Son's sake, will help me. And thus
in other of my temporal and spiritual concerns I pray to
the Lord, and expect an answer to my requests ; and may
not you do the same, dear believing reader ? Oh ! I beseech
you, do not think me an extraordinary believer, having
privileges above other of God's dear children, which they
cannot have ; nor look on my way of acting as something
that would not do for other believers. Make but trial !
Do but stand still in the hour of trial, and you will see the
help of God, if you trust in him. But there is so often a
forsaking the ways of the Lord in the hour of trial, anJ
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 235
thus i\\Q food for faith, the means whereby our faith may
be increased, is lost. This leads me to the following im-
portant point. You ask, How may I, a true believer, have
my faith strengthened ? The answer is this : —
I. " Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above,
and cometh down from the Father of lights, with whom is
no variableness, neither shadow of turning." James i. 17,
As the increase of faith is a good gift, it must come
from God, and therefore he ought to be asked for this
blessing.
II. The following means, however, ought to be used :
1. The careful reading of the word of God, combined with
meditation on it. Through reading of the word of God,
and especially through meditation on the word of God,
the believer becomes more and more acquainted with the
nature and character of God, and thus sees more and
more, besides his holiness and justice, what a kind, loving,
gracious, merciful, mighty, wise, and faithful being he is,
and, therefore, in poverty, affliction of body, bereavement
in his family, difficulty in his service, want of a situation
or employment, he will repose upon the ability of God to
help him, because he has not only learned from his word
that he is of almighty power and infinite wisdom, but he
has also seen instance upon instance in the Holy Scrip-
tures in which his almighty power and infinite wisdom
have been actually exercised in helping and delivering his
people ; and he will repose upon the willingness of God
to help him, because he has not only learned from the
Scriptures what a kind, good, merciful, gracious, and
faithful being God is, but because he has also seen in the
word of God, how in a great variety of instances he has
proved himself to be so. And the consideration of this,
if God has become Jcnown to us through prayer and medi-
tation on his own word, will lead us, in general at least,
with a measure of confidence to rely upon him: and
236 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
thus the reading of the word of God, together with
meditation on it, will be one especial means to strengthen
our faith. ,
2. As, with reference to the growth of every grace of the
Spirit, it is of the utmost importance that we seek to
maintain an upright heart and a good conscience, and,
therefore, do not knowingly and habitually indulge in
those things which are contrary to the mind of God, so it
is also particularly the case with reference to the growth
in faith. How can I possibly continue to act faith upon
God, concerning anything, if I am habitually grieving
him, and seek to detract from the glory and honor of him
in whom I profess to trust, upon whom I profess to de-
pend ? All my confidence towards God, all my leaning
upon him in the hour of trial, will be gone, if I have a
guilty conscience, and do riot seek to put away this guilty
conscience, but still continue to do things which are con-
trary to the mind of God. And if, in any particular
instance, I cannot trust in God, because of the guilty con-
science, then my faith is weakened by that instance of
distrust; for faith with every fresh trial of it either
increases by trusting God, and thus getting help, or it
decreases by not trusting him ; and then there is less and
less power of looking simply and directly to him, and a
habit of self-dependence is begotten or encouraged. One
or other of these will always be the case in each particular
instance. Either we trust in God, and in that case we
neither trust in ourselves, nor in our fellow-men, nor in
circumstances, nor in anything besides; or we DO trust
in one or more of these, and in that case do NOT trust
in God.
3. If we, indeed, desire our faith to be strengthened, we
should not shrink from opportunities where our faith may
be tried, and, therefore, through the trial, be strengthened.
In our natural state we dislike deahcor with G^d ak>ne.
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 237
Through our natural alienation from God we shrink from
O
him, and from eternal realities. This cleaves to us more
or less, even after our regeneration. Hence it is that,
more or less, even as believers, we have the same shrinking
from standing with God alone, from depending upon him
alone, from looking to him alone ; and yet this is the very
position in which we ought to be, if we wish our faith to
be strengthened. The more I am in a position to be tried
in faith with reference to my body, my family, my service
for the Lord, my business, etc., the more shall I have op-
portunity of seeing God's help and deliverance ; and every
fresh instance in which he helps and delivers me will tend
towards the increase of my faith. On this account, there-
fore, the believer should not shrink from situations, posi-
tions, circumstances, in which his faith may be tried, but
should cheerfully embrace them as opportunities where he
may see the hand of God stretched out on his behalf, to
help and deliver him, and whereby he may thus have his
faith strengthened.
4. The last important point for the strengthening of our
faith is, that we let God work for us, when the hour of
the trial of our faith comes, and do not work a deliverance
of our own. "Wherever God has given faith, it is given,
among other reasons, for the very purpose of being tried.
Yea, however weak our faith may be, God will try it ; only
with this restriction, that as, in every way, he leads us on
gently, gradually, patiently, so also with reference to the
trial of our faith. At first, our faith will be tried very
little in comparison with what it may be afterwards ; for
God never lays more upon us than he is willing to enable
us to bear. Now, when the trial of faith comes, we are
naturally inclined to distrust God, and to trust rather in
ourselves, or in our friends, or in circumstances. We will
rather work a deliverance of our own, somehow or other,
than simply look to God and wait for his help. But if we do
238 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV.
not patiently wait for God's help, if we work a deliverance
of our own, then at the next trial of our faith it will be
thus again, we shall be again inclined to deliver ourselv *s ;
and thus, with every fresh instance of that kind, our faith
will decrease ; whilst,* on the contrary, were we to stand
still in order to see the salvation of God, to see his hand
stretched out on our behalf, trusting in him alone, then
our faith would be increased, and with every fresh case in
which the hand of God is stretched out on our behalf in
the hour of the trial of our faith, our faith would be in-
creased yet more. Would the believer, therefore, have his
faith strengthened, he must, especially, give time to God,
who tries his faith in order to prove to his child, in the
end, how willing he is to help and deliver him, the moment
it is good for him.
I now return, dear reader, to the Narrative, giving you
some further information with reference to the seventeen
months from Dec. 10, 1840, to May 10, 1842, as it respects
the Orphan Houses, and other objects of the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad, besides the
facts of which mention has been already made.
During this period, also, 1. Two Sunday schools were
entirely supported by the funds of the Institution. 2. There
were two adult schools, one for females, and one for males,
entirely supported during these seventeen months, in
which on two evenings of the week the males, and on two
evenings the females, were instructed, quite gratuitously,
in reading and writing, and were furnished with books and
writing materials gratuitously. There were, during these
seventeen months, 344 adults taught in these two schools,
and on May 10, 1842, the number under instruction
amounted to 110. 3. There were, during these seventeen
months, also six day schools entirely supported by the
funds of the Institution, three for boys and three for girls.
On May 10, 1842, the number of the children who attended
1842. WALKING IN DARKNESS. 239
these day schools was 363 ; and the total number who,
from the formation of the Institution, March 5, 1834, up to
May 10, 1842, had been instructed in the day schools,
which are supported by the funds of the Institution,
amounts to 2,616. 4. During these seventeen months, 798
copies of the Holy Scriptures were circulated, and from
the commencement of the Institution, up to May 10, 1842,
6,842 copies. 5. During these seventeen months was spent
for missionary purposes the sum of £126, 15s. 3d. of the
funds of the Institution, whereby assistance was rendered
to the work of God in Jamaica, in Australia, in Canada,
and in the East Indies. 6. At the commencement of these
seventeen months, i. e. on Dec. 10, 1840, a new object was
begun, the circulation of such publications as may be
beneficial, with the blessing of God, to both unbelievers
and believers. We laid out for this object during these
seventeen months the sum of £62,17s.4d., for which 22,190
such little publications were purchased, and of which
number 19,609 were actually given away. 7. There were
received into the three Orphan Houses 15 orphans, who,
together with those who were in the houses on Dec. 10,
1840, make up 106 in all. Of these, five girls were sent out
to service, two boys and one girl were apprenticed, one
girl was removed by a lady who had placed her for a time
under our care, and one was sent back to his relations, as
he was injurious to the other children.
There were on May 10, 1842, 96 orphans in the three
houses, i. e. 30 in the Girls' Orphan House, 37 in the Infant
Orphan House, and 29 in the Boys' Orphan House. Be-
sides this, three apprentices were supported by the funds
of the Institution ; so that the total number was 99. The
number of orphans who were under our care from April,
1836, to May 10, 1842, amounts to 144.
I notice further, in connection with the Orphan Houses,
that, without any one having been asked for anything by me^
240 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIV,
the sum of £5,276, 14s. 8d. was given to me from the begin-
ning of the work up to May 10, 1842, as the result of
prayer to God.
The total of the expenditure for the various objects of
the Institution, exclusive of the Orphan Houses, during
these seventeen months, amounted to £710, lls. 5d. ; the
total of the income amounted to £746, Is. OJcl. The total
of the expenditure for the three Orphan Houses, from Dec.
10, 1840, to May 10, 1842, amounted to £1,337, 15s. 2|d.;
the total of the inconiu amounted to £1,339, 13s. 7d.
CHAPTER XV.
PROSPERITY.
1842 — 1843.
ABUNDANT SUPPLIES — RESTING ON THE WRITTEN WORD — " SEEKING AND
FINDING"— ERRONEOUS IMPRESSIONS REMOVED — PERSEVERING AND
PREVAILING PRAYER ANSWERED — " LENGTHENING THE CORDS AND
STRENGTHENING THE STAKES " — A FOURTH ORPHAN HOUSE.
JUNE 3, 1842. For several days past I had not been
particularly led to pray for means for the orphans. Last
evening, however, I did so, as we had now again no money
in hand, there having come in only ten pounds two shil-
lings twopence during the last five days ; and in answer to
my request two pounds nineteen shillings sixpence came
in this morning.
For several months succeeding the last date, means
continued to flow in, without interruption, as they
were needed. There was no excess of means, nor
was there any lack. On Dec. 1, 1842, Mr. Miiller
writes: —
Nothing had come in, except five shillings for needle-
work. The laborers had nothing to give, except one of
21
242 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XV.
them one shilling sixpence ; yet this little supplied the
absolute need, which was only milk. We were unable to
take in the usual quantity of bread. Should it be said
that the not taking in the usual quantity of bread would
at once prove to the bakers that we are poor, my reply is,
that that does not follow, because bread has often been
sent as a present, as may be seen in the list of articles,
given for the orphans, at the end of the printed Reports.
But perhaps it may be asked, Why do you not take the
bread on credit ? What does it matter whether you pay
immediately for it, or at the end of the month, or the
quarter, or the half year? Seeing that the Orphan Houses
are the work of the Lord, may you not trust in him that
he will supply you with means to pay the bills which you
contract with the butcher, baker, grocer, etc. as the things
which you purchase are needful ? My reply is this : 1. If
the work in which we are engaged is indeed the work of
God, then he whose work it is is surely able and willing to
provide the means for it. 2. But not only so, he will also
provide the means at the time when they are needed. I do
not mean that he will provide them when ice think that
they are needed ; but yet that when there is real need,
such as the necessaries of life being required, he will give
them ; and on the same ground on which we suppose we
do trust in God to help us to pay the debt which we now
contract, we may and ought to trust in the Lord to supply
us with what we require at present, so that there may be
no need for going into debt. 3. It is true, I might have
goods on credit, and to a very considerable amount ; but,
then, the result would be, that the next time we were
again in straits, the mind would involuntarily be turned to
further credit which I might have, instead of being turned
to the Lord, and thus faith, which is kept up and strength-
ened only by being EXERCISED, would become weaker and
weaker, till at last, according to all human probability, I
1842. PROSPERITY. 243
should find myself deeply in debt and have no prospect of
getting out of it. 4. Faith has to do with the word of
God, — rests upon the written word of God ; but there is
no promise that he will pay our debts. The word says
rather, " Owe no man anything ;" whilst there is tho
promise given to his children, " I will never leave thee noi
forsake thee," and, " Whosoever believeth on him shall not
be confounded." On this account we could not say, uppi,
the ground of the Holy Scriptures, Why do you not trust
in God that he will supply you with means to pay youi
debts which you contract in his service for the necessities
of the orphans ? 5. The last reason why we do not take
goods on credit is this : The chief and primary object of
the work was not the temporal welfare of the children, noi
even their spiritual welfare, blessed and glorious as it is,
and much as, through grace, we seek after it and pray for
it ; but the first and primary object of the work was, to
show before the whole world and the whole church of Christ^
that even in these last evil days the living God is ready to
prove himself as the living God, by being ever willing to
help, succor, comfort, and answer the prayers of those who
trust in him : so that we need not go away from him to
our fellow-men, or to the ways of the world, seeing that
he is both able and willing to supply us with all we can
need in his service.
From the beginning, when God put this service into my
heart, I had anticipated trials and straits ; but knowing, as
I did, the heart of God, through the experience of several
years previously, I also knew that he would listen to the
prayers of his child who trusts in him, and that he would
not leave him in the hour of need, but listen to his prayers,
and deliver him out of the difficulty, and that then, this
being made known in print for the benefit of both believers
and unbelievers, others would be led to trust in the Lord.
We discern, therefore, more and more clearly that it is for
244 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV.
the church's benefit that we are put into these straits, and
if therefore in the hour of need we were to take goods on
credit, the first and primary object of the work would be
completely frustrated, and no heart would be further
strengthened to trust in God ; nor would there be any
langer that manifestation of the special and particular
providence of God which has hitherto been so abundantly
shown through this work, even in the eyes of unbelievers,
whereby they have been led to see that there is after all
reality in the things of God, and many, through these
printed accounts, have been truly converted. For these
reasons, then, we consider it our precious privilege, as here-
tofore, to continue to wait upon the Lord only, instead of
taking goods on credit, or borrowing money from some
kind friends, when we are in need. Nay, we purpose, as
God shall give us grace, to look to him only, though morn-
ing after morning we should have nothing in hand for the
work, yea, though from meal to meal we should have to
look to him ; being fully assured that he who is now (1845)
in the tenth year feeding these many orphans, and who has
never suffered them to want, and that he who is now
(1845) in the twelfth year carrying on the other parts
of the work, without any branch of it being stopped
for want of means, will do so for the future also. And
here I do desire, in the deep consciousness of my natural
helplessness and dependence upon the Lord, to confess that
through the grace of God my soul has been in peace,
though day after day we have had to wait for our daily
provisions upon the Lord ; yea, though even from meal to
meal we have been required to do this.
Dec. 16. Nothing has come in. Three shillings five-
pence, which one of the laborers was able to give, was all
we had. At six o'clock this evening, our need being now
very great, not only with reference to the Orphan Houses,
but also the day schools, etc., I gave myself, with two of
1842 PROSPERITY. 245
the laborers, to prayer. There needed some money to
come in before eight o'clock to-moirow morning, as there
was none to take in milk for breakfast (the children have
oatmeal porridge with milk for breakfast), to say nothing
about the many other demands of to-morrow, being Satur-
day. Our hearts were at peace, while asking the Lord,
and assured that our Father would supply our need. WE
HAD SCARCELY RISEN FROM OUR KXEES when I received a
letter, containing a sovereign for the orphans, half of
which was from a young East India officer, and the other
half the produce of the sale of a piece of work which the
sister who sent the money had made for the benefit of
the orphans. She wrote, " I love to send these little gifts.
They so often come in season." Truly, thus it was at this
time. About five minutes later I received from a brother
the promise of fifty pounds for the orphans, to be given
during the next week ; and a quarter of an hour after that,
about seven o'clock, a brother gave me a sovereign, which
an Irish sister in the Lord had left this day, on her de-
parture for Dublin, for the benefit of the orphans. How
sweet and precious to see thus so manifestly the willing-
ness of the Lord to answer the prayers of his needy
children !
Dec. 19. Our need with reference to the school fund
had been great during the last three weeks, though we
had received as much as the teachers absolutely required.
Now, however, it was very great, as one brother especially
needed to have several pounds within a day or two, and
three other teachers also required supplies. It had in ad-
dition to this been much in my heart to send some money
to several brethren who labor in foreign lands, in depend
ence upon the Lord only for their pecuniary supplies;
but I had been kept from doing so for want of means. On
these accounts, therefore, I gave myself again especially to
prayer this morning, when, within a quarter of an hour
21*
246 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV
after I Lad risen from my knees, I received the order foi
one hundred pounds, which I was at liberty to use as need
required.
EEYTEW OF THE YEAR 1842.
1. As to the church. TLere are 601 at present in com-
munion; 73 have been added during the past year, of
whom 27 have been brought to the knowledge of the Lord
among us.
2. As to the supply of my temporal necessities, the
Lord has been pleased to send me £329, 16s.
Feb. 11, 1843. We had one pound fourteen shillings
towards the expenses of this day. But as this was not
enough, I asked the Lord still further for help, and, behold,
this morning's post brought me a post-office order for two
pounds from Stafford, of which one pound seven shil-
lings sixpence is for the orphans. Thus we have three
pounds one shilling sixpence, which is quite enough for
this day.
Admire with me, my dear reader, if you know the Lord,
his seasonable help. Why does this post-office order not
come a few days sooner or later ? Because the Lord would
help us by means of it, and therefore influences the donor
just then, and not sooner nor later, to send it. Surely, all
who know the Lord, and who have no interest in disown-
ing it, cannot but see his hand in a remarkable manner in
this work. Nor will the godly and simple-minded reader
aay, " There is no difference between this way of proceed-
ing, on the one hand, and going from individual to indi-
vidual, asking them for means, on the other hand ; for the
writing of the Reports is just the same thing." My dear
reader, there is a great difference. Suppose that we are
in need. Suppose that our poverty lasts for some weeks,
or even some months, together. Is there not, in that case,
1843. PROSPERITY. 2i7
a difference between asking the Lord only from clay to
day, without speaking to any human being not connected
directly with the work about our poverty, on the one hand,
and writing letters or making personal application to
benevolent individuals for assistance, on the other hand ?
Truly, there is a great difference between these two modes.
I do not mean to say that it would be acting against the
precepts of the Lord to seek for help in his work by per-
sonal and individual application to believers (though it
would be in direct opposition to his will to apply to un-
believers^ 2 Cor. vi. 14-18) ; but I act in the way in which
I do for the benefit of the church at large, cheerfully bear-
ing the trials, and sometimes the deep trials, connected
with this life of faith (which however brings along with it
also its precious joys), if by any means a part at least of
my fellow-believers might be led to see the reality of deal-
ing with God only, and that there is such a thing as the
child of God having power with God by prayer and faith.
That the Lord should use for so glorious a service one so
vile, so unfaithful, so altogether unworthy of the least
notice as I am, I can only ascribe to the riches of his con-
descending grace, in which he takes up the most unlikely
instruments, that the honor may be manifestly his. -
Should Satan seek to whisper into your ears, Perhaps
the matter is made known, after all, when there is need (as
it has been once said about me at a public meeting in a
large town, that when we were in want I prayed publicly
that the Lord would send help for the orphans, which ia
entirely false) ; I say, should it be said that I took care
that our wants were made known, I reply : Whom did I
ask for anything these many years since th? work has been
going on ? To whom did I make known our wants, ex-
cept to those who are closely connected with the work?
Nay, so far from wishing to make known our need, for the
purpose of influencing benevolent persons to contribute to
248 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV,
the necessities of the Institution under my caiMs, I have
even refused to let our circumstances be known, after hav-
ing been asked about them, when, on simply saying that
we were in need, I might have had considerable sums.
Some instances of this have been given in the former part
of this Narrative. In such cases I refused in order that
the hand of God only might be manifest ; for that, and not
the money, nor even the ability of continuing to carry on
the work, is my especial aim. And such self-possession
has the Lord given me, that in the times of the deepest
poverty, whilst there was nothing at all in hand, and whilst
we had even from meal to meal to wait upon the Lord for
the necessities of more than one hundred persons, when a
donation of five pounds or ten pounds, or more, has been
given to me, the donors could not have read in my coun-
tenance whether we had much or nothing at all in hand.
But enough of this. I have made these few remarks, be-
loved reader, lest by any means you should lose the bless-
ing which might come to your soul through reading the
account of the Lord's faithfulness and readiness to hear
the prayers of his children.
March 8. On Oct. 25, 1842, 1 had a long conversation
with a sister in the Lord, who opened her heart to me.
On leaving me I told her that my house and my purse
were hers, and that I should be glad if she would have
one purse with me. This I said because I judged that at
some future time it might prove a comfort to her in an
hour of trial, having at the same time, to judge from a
circumstance which had occurred two days before, every
reason to believe that she had not five pounds of her own.
This sister, after I had said so, readily took me at my
word, and said, I shall be glad of it, adding presently that
she had five hundred pounds. The moment I heard that,
I drew back, and said that had I known that she had any
money I should not have made her this offer, and theo
1843. PROSPERITY. 249
gave her my reason why I had supposed she had no prop-
erty at all. She then assured me that she possessed five
hundred pounds, and that she had never seen it right to
give up this money, else she would have done so ; but
that, as God had put this sum into her hands without her
seeking, she thought it was a provision which the Lord had
made for her. I replied scarcely anything to this; but
she asked me to pray for her with reference to this matter.
This whole conversation about the money occupied but very
few minutes, and it all took place after the sister had risen
and was on the point of leaving me. After she was gone,
I asked the Lord if he would be pleased to make this dear
sister so happy in himself, and enable her so to realize her
true riches and inheritance in the Lord Jesus, and the
reality of her heavenly calling, that she might be con-
strained by the love of Christ cheerfully to lay down this
five hundred pounds at his feet. From that time I re-
peated this my request before the Lord daily ^ and often
two, three, or four times a day ; but not a single word or
line passed between me and this sister on the subject, nor
did I even see her / for I judged that it would be far bet-
ter that she retained this money, than that by persuasion
she should give it up, and afterwards perhaps regret the
step she had taken, and thereby more dishonor than
honor be brought on the name of the Lord. After
I had thus for twenty-four days daily besought the Lord
on behalf of this sister, I found her one day, on returning
home, at my house, when she told me that she wished to
see me alone. She then said to me that from the time she
had last conversed with me she had sought to ascertain
the Lord's will with reference to the five hundred pounds,
and had examined the Scriptures and prayed about it, and
that she was now assured that it was the will of the Lord
she should give up this money. After she had told me
this, I exhorted her to count well the cost, and to do
250 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV
nothing rashly, .est she should regret the step she had
taken, and to ^ ait at least a fortnight longer before she
carried out her intention. Thus we separated. On the
eighteenth day after this conversation I received the fol-
lowing letter : —
DEAR BROTHER:
I believe the Lord has not permitted you to grow weary of
remembering me, but that he has still enabled you to bear me upon
your heart in his presence. All is well with me, dear brother.
Your petitions have been heard and answered ; I am happy and at
peace. The Lord has indeed manifested his tender care of and
his great love towards me in Jesus, in inclining my heart cheerfully
to lay all I have hitKerto called my own at his feet. It is a high
privilege.
I write in haste to ask you, as we have now one purse, to re-
ceive the money at a bank in Bristol. I will direct it to be sent
in my name, to be delivered into your hands, etc.
As this whole circumstance is related only for the profit
of the reader, and as I knew that the sister still had my
letters on the subject in her possession, I wrote to her,
requesting her to send them to me, at the time when I pub-
lished the last account about the Orphan Houses, etc.,
and extracts of them were given in the last Report, in so
far as they might refer to the subject or tend to edification.
These extracts are here reprinted. My reply to the above
was this : —
BRISTOL, DEC. 6, 1842.
MY DEAR SISTER:
Your letter found me in peace, and did not in the least surprise
me. Dealing with God is a reality. Saints have power with him
through Jesus. It is now forty-two days since you first mentioned
this matter to me. I cannot but admire the wisdom of God and his
love to you in allowing me to speak to you as I did [i. e. offering
her to have one purse with me, when I thought she had no earthly
possessions at all], that thus this great privilege might be bestowed
1843. PEOSPERITY. 251
on you to give up this little sum for him. Since that hour I have
daily prayed for you, and often thrice or more in the course of the
day, that the Lord would make you so happy in himself, and help you
with such faith to lay hold on all which he has given you in Jesus,
that you might be constrained by love cheerfully to lay down this
little sum at his feet. Thus I prayed again at six o'clock this morn-
ing for you. Nor have I had the least doubt from the commence-
ment that the Lord did hear my prayer ; yea, so fully have I been
assured that I had the petition, that again and again I have thanked
him that he had answered my prayer, before I saw you eighteen
days since, and before your letter came this morning. Moreover, I
have been fully assured, since you were last here, that he was car-
rying on his work in your soul with reference to this matter, and
that no subtle suggestions of Satan, nor educational prejudices, nor
misinterpretations of the Scriptures, were able to prevail ; for I
had asked the Lord by his Spirit to overcome them in you, and
that, if a brother's word should be needed, he would be pleased to
incline your heart to write to me ; and as no letter came, I felt
fully confident you were going forward in this matter in peace.
When I had seen you this day six weeks, and learned about this
little sum, / determined never to say or write to you another word on
the subject, but to leave you in the hands of the Lord. Thus I pur-
posed again during the last eighteen days ; for it was not the money
given up, that I cared for in you, but the money given up unto the
Lord, and from right motives. On this very account I advised you
to wait one fortnight longer, though you had come to the conclu-
sion ; but now, having done so, and seeing that you are fully pur-
posed in the Lord to be poor in this world indeed, that the more
abundantly you may enjoy his riches, his inexhaustible riches, I
change my advice. My word now, beloved sister, is this : " What-
soever thy hand findeth to do, do it with thy might," and " If ye
know these things, happy are ye if ye do them." Delay then no
longer, even as also you have no desire to delay ; and the Lord
will bless you abundantly in doing so, inasmuch as you do it unto
him. As you desire to intrust me with this money, I do not refuse
it, knowing many ways to lay it out for him, etc. [Then only fol-
lows the direction how the money is to be paid into my banker's
bands.]
252 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV.
On Dec. 18, 1842, 1 received a reply to my letter, which
answer was begun to be written on Dec. 8th, but finished
on the 16th. I give a few extracts of the letter : —
Since I last saw you, dear brother, I have not had the slightest
doubt as to what I ought to do. The word of God has been so
clear to me on this head, that I have been kept resting on it, and,
in answer to your prayers, no temptation has been allowed to
prevail, indeed, I think I may add to arise. But I feel that tempta-
tions may come, and that I may in seasons of trial not always have
faith to be able to rejoice in this privilege. My heart is so deceit-
ful, and my faith so weak, that I shall greatly need your prayers
still. Will you, then, if the Lord enables you, pray that I may
never offend my Father by regretting in the least measure this act
of obedience, which he has by his grace inclined me to carry out ?
Before I ever saw you I had asked the Lord to make me willing to
give this little sum into your hands, if it were his will I should ;
but his time to make me willing had not then come ; even then I
had in a measure given it to you, having written a paper, desiring
in case I should fall asleep in Jesus, that you might get possession
of it. I had it signed by two witnesses, and I always carried it
about with me when I travelled, sealed, and directed to you.
When I wrote this, I little thought what grace the Lord had in
store for me. You will forgive my being thus tedious, but I am
sure you will praise the Lord with me for his gracious dealings
with me, etc.
At the end of this letter, which was finished on Dec. 16,
the sister tells me that unexpectedly a hindrance had
arisen to her having possession of the money, so that it
was not likely it could be paid over to me. till about the
end of January, 1843.
When this letter came, it would have been naturally a
great disappointment to me, as the sister had told me in
a previous letter that the money should be paid into my
hands, and as just at that time in a variety of ways it was
desirable that I should have considerable sums. The Lord,
however, enabled me to immediately lay hold on that
1843. PROSPERITY. 253
word, " We know that all things work together for good
to them that love God," Rom. viii. 28, and my soul was in
peace, though we had only enough money in hand to pro-
vide for one or at the most for two days the necessary
provisions in the Orphan Houses. It was but the next
day, Dec. 19, 1842, when I received one hundred pounds
from A. B., and on Dec. 22, I received fifty pounds
from a brother in Bristol, besides other donations ; so that
within one week after I had had grace to delight myself in
the will of God, he gave me about two hundred pounds,
whereby I was able to meet all the heavy expenses of
replenishing the stores, etc., on account of which I should
naturally have been tried in the payment of the money
being delayed.
In reply to the letter which I received from this sister
on Dec. 18, 1 wrote another on Dec. 31, 1842, of which I
give an extract on this subject : —
I have continued to pray for you, or rather the Lord has enabled
me every day once, twice, thrice, or even more, to remember you.
The burden of my prayer still has been, that he would be pleased
to make you very happy in himself, and enable you to enter into
the inheritance which awaits you ; further, that you may not be
permitted in the least to regret the step which you have taken, but
rather consider it a privilege to be permitted to give this little sum
back to him who gave it to you, and who gave himself for you
With reference to the delay, I cannot but rejoice. This gives you
abundant opportunity to ponder the matter, and afterwards to state
to any (who, judging as those who know not how rich the saints
are, might blame you) that you did not do the thing in haste. I
consider this delay to be for the furtherance of the honor of the
Lord. You know my advice to you, to wait at least a fortnight.
That you have seen much of your unfaithfulness, etc., I consider to
be an especial blessing which the Lord has bestowed upon you, lest
this step you have taken should become a snare to you. Hum-
blings last our whole life. Jesus came not to save painted but real
sinners ; but he has saved us, and will surely make it manifest. 1
22
254 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP XV,
have a passage laid on my heart for you ; read the whole of it
carefully : 2 Cor. viii. 1-9, especially verse 9.
Day after day now passed away and the money did not
come. The month of January was come to an end, and
February also, and the money had not come. Thus more
than one hundred and twenty days were gone by, whilst
day by day I brought my petition before the Lord that
he would bless this sister, keep her steadfast in her pur-
pose, and intrust me with this money for his work in my
hands. Amidst it all my heart was assured, judging from
the earnestness which he had given rne in prayer, and that
I had only desired this matter to the praise of his name,
that in his own time he would bring it about. ~But I never
wrote one single line to this sister on the subject all this
time. At last, on the one hundred and thirty-fourth day
since I had daily besought the Lord about this matter, on
March 8, 1843, I received a letter from the sister, informing
me that the five hundred pounds had been paid into the
hands of my bankers.
And now I only give a few lines of a letter which I
received on July 3, 1844, from the sister who gave this
donation, together with my letters for which I had asked
her, in order that I may show her state of mind on the sub-
ject, after she had had it more than twenty months before
her, and after she had for sixteen months actually given
up the money. She writes thus : " I am thankful to say
that I have never for one moment had the slightest feeling
of regret, but it is wholly of the Lord's abounding grace.
I speak it to his praise."
On March 31, 1843, 1 called at the Orphan Houses to
make certain arrangements, and one of the sisters told me
by the way that she had been asked by Miss G., who with
her father occupied the house No. 4 Wilson Street, to let
me know thai they wished to give up their house, if I
1843. PROSPERITY. 255
would like to take it ; but she had replied that it was of
no use to tell me about it, for she was sure that I had no
thought of opening another Orphan House. When I came
home, this matter greatly occupied my mind. I could not
but ask the Lord again and again whether he would have
me to open another Orphan House, and whether the
time was now come that I should serve him still more
extensively in this way. The more I pondered the matter,
the more it appeared to me that this was the hand of God
moving me onwards in this service. The following re-
markable combination of circumstances struck me in par-
ticular: 1. There are more applications made for the ad-
mission of orphans, especially of late, than we are at all
able to meet, though we fill the houses as much as the
health of the children and of the laborers will possibly
admit. 2. If I did take another house for orphans, it
would be most desirable it should be in the same street
where the other three are, as thus the labor is less, and
in times of great need we are near together for prayer, the
distribution of the money, etc. But since the third
Orphan House was opened, in Nov. 1837, there never
has been one of the larger houses in the street to be let.
3. There are about fifteen children in the Infant Orphan
House, whom it would have been well some time ago to
have removed to the house for the older girls, had there
been room; but when a vacancy happened to occur in
that house, there were generally several waiting to fill it
up, so that unintentionally the female children in the
Infant Orphan House remained where they were ; but
this is not well, nor is it according to my original intention;
for the infants were intended only to be left till they are
seven years old, and then to be removed to the houses
for older boys and girls. This my original plan could be
executed better for the future, and at once for the present,
vrere I to open another Orphan House. 4. I know two
256 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV.
sisters who seem suitable laborers for this fourth Orphan
House, and who have a desire thus to be engaged. 5.
There are three hundred pounds remaining of the five
hundred pounds which I so lately received. This money
may be used for the furnishing and fitting up of a new
Orphan House. So much money I have never had in
hand at any one time during the last five years. This
seemed to me a remarkable thing, in connection with the
four other reasons. 6. The establishing of a fourth Orphan
House, which would increase our expenses several hundred
pounds a year, would be, after we have gone for five years
almost uninterruptedly through trials of faith, a plain
proof that I have not regretted this service, and that I am
not tired of this precious way of depending upon the
Lord from day to day ; and thus the faith of other children
of God might be strengthened.
But most important, yea, decidedly conclusive as these
points were, yet they did not convince me that I ought
to go forward in this service, if the Spirit's leadings were
not in connection with them. I therefore gave my-
self to prayer. I prayed day after day, without saying
anything to any human being. I prayed two and twenty
days without even mentioning it to my dear wife. On
that very day, when I did mention it to her, and on which
I had come to the conclusion, after three weeks' prayer
and consideration in the fear of God, to establish another
Orphan House, I received from A. B. fifty pounds. What
a striking confirmation that the Lord will help,. though the
necessities should increase more and more. At last, on
the twenty-fourth day, having been now for several days
fully assured that God would have me go forward in this
service, I went to inquire whether Mr. and Miss G. still
wished to give up the house. But here I found an appar-
ent hindrance. Having heard no wish expressed on my
part to take the house, and the sister in the Orphan
1843. PROSPERITY. 257
Houses, with whom Miss G. had communicated, not having
given her the least reason to think that I should do so, Mr.
and Miss G. had altered their plans, and now purposed to
remain in the house. However, I was to call again in a
week, when I should receive an answer. I was not in the
least discomforted by this obstacle. " Lord, if thou hast
no need of another Orphan House, I have none," was the
burden of my prayer. I was willing to do God's will, yea,
to delight myself in his will. And just on this very
ground, because I knew I sought not my own honor, but
the Lord's ; because I knew I was not serving myself, but
the Lord, in this thing ; and because I knew that with
so much calm, quiet, prayerful, self-questioning considera-
tion I had gone about this business, and had only after
many days, during which I had been thus waiting upon
the Lord, come to the conclusion that it was the will of
God I should go forward in this service. For these
reasons I felt sure, notwithstanding what Mr. and Miss G.
had told me, that I should have the house. I also espe-
cially judged that thus it would be, because I was quite in
peace when I heard of the obstacle ; a plain proof that I
was not in self-will going on in this matter, but according
to the leading of the Holy Ghost ; for if according to my
natural mind I had sought to enlarge the work, I should
have been excited and uncomfortable when I met with
this obstacle. After a week I called again on Mr. G.
And now see how God had wrought ! On the same day
on which I had seen Mr. G., he went out and met with a
suitable house, so that when I came the second time, he
was willing to let me have the one which he then occupied
in Wilson Street ; and as the owner accepted me as a ten-
ant, all the difficulties were removed, so that after the 1st
of June we began fitting up the house, and in July the
first orphans were received.
22*
258 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XV.
Mr. M. having been invited by several Christians in
Germany to visit that, his native land, and to labor
there for the promulgation of scriptural truth and the
advancement of religion, as well as to publish a Ger-
man translation of his Narrative, felt that it was hia
duty to accede to the request. In answer to prayer,
he received ample means for his journey, for the sup-
port of the orphans during his absence, and for the
publication of the Narrative. He left Bristol on the
9th of August, 1843, and returned on March 6, 1844.
During the journey he was greatly aided by Provi-
dence in the purposes of his mission, and saw much
fruit of his labors.
CHAPTER XVI.
STEWARDSHIP.
1844.
EARTHLY AND HEAVENLY TREASURES — SEEKING THE KINGDOM OP GOD
— FELLOWSHIP WITH THE FATHER — THE CHRISTIAN MERCHANT —
EXAMPLES — MISTAKES.
IN concluding this portion of my Narrative, I would
add some hints on a few passages of the word of God,
both because I have so very frequently found them little
regarded by Christians, and also because I have proved
their preciousness, in some measure, in my own experi-
ence ; and therefore wish that all my fellow-saints may
share the blessing with me.
I. In Matt. vi. 19-21, it is written: "Lay not up foi
yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth
corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal ; but
lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither
moth iior rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not
break through nor steal : for where your treasure is, there
will your heart be also." Observe, dear reader, the follow-
ing points concerning this part of the divine testimony :
1. It is the Lord Jesus, our Lord and .Master, who speaks
this as the lawgiver of his people, — he who has infinite
wisdom and unfathomable love to us, who therefore both
knows what is for our real welfare and happiness, and who
260 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVI,
cannot exact from us any requirement inconsistent with
that love which led him to lay down his life for us.
2. His counsel, his affectionate entreaty, and his com-
mandment to us his disciples is, " Lay not up for yourselves
treasures upon earth." The meaning obviously is, that the
disciples of the Lord Jesus, being strangers and pilgrims
on earth, i. e. neither belonging to the earth nor expecting
to remain in it, should not see7c to increase their earthly
possessions, in whatever these possessions may consist.
This is a word for poor believers as well as for rich believ-
ers ; it has as much a reference to putting shillings into
the savings bank as to putting thousands of pounds into
the funds, or purchasing one house or one farm after
another. It may be said, But does not every prudent and
provident person seek to increase his means, that he may
have a goodly portion to leave to his children, or to have
something for old age, or for the time of sickness, etc. ?
My reply is, it is quite true that this is the custom of the
world. But whilst thus it is in the world, and we have
every reason to believe ever will be so among those that
are of the world, and who therefore have their portion on
earth, we disciples of the Lord Jesus, being born again,
being the children of God, not nominally, but really, being
truly partakers of the divine nature, being in fellowship
with the Father and the Son, and having in prospect " an
inheritance incorruptible, and undefiled, and that fadeth
not away," (1 Peter i. 4,) ought in every respect to act
differently from the world, and so in this particular also.
If we disciples of the Lord Jesus seek, like the people of
the world, after an increase of our possessions, may not
those who are of the world justly question whether we
believe what we say, when we speak about our inheritance,
our heavenly calling, our being the children of God, etc. ?
Often it must be a sad stumbling-block to the unbeliever
to s<*<* a professed believer in the Lord Jesus acting in this
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 261
particular just like himself. Consider this, dear brethren
in the Lord, should this remark apply to you.
3. Our Lord says about the earth that it is a place
"where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves
break through and steal." All that is of the earth, and in
any way connected with it, is subject to corruption, to
change, to dissolution. There is no reality, or substance,
in anything else but in heavenly things. Often the careful
amassing of earthly possessions ends in losing them in a
moment by fire, by robbery, by a change of mercantile
concerns, by loss of work, etc. ; but suppose all this were
not the case, still, yet a little while, and thy soul shall be
required of thee ; or, yet a little while, and the Lord Jesus
will return ; and what profit shalt thou then have, dear
reader, if thou hast carefully sought to increase thy earthly
possessions ?
4. Our Lord, however, does not merely bid us not to lay
up treasure upon earth ; for if he had said no more, this
his commandment might be abused, and persons might
find in it an encouragement for their extravagant habits,
for their love of pleasure, for their habit of spending every-
thing they have, or can obtain, upon themselves. It does
not mean, then, as is the common phrase, that we should
" live up to our income ; " for he adds, " But lay up for
yourselves treasures in heaven." There is such a thing as
laying up as truly in heaven as there is laying up on earth ;
if it were not so, our Lord would not have said so. Just
as persons put one sum after another into the bank, and
it is put down to their credit, and they may use the money
afterwards : so truly the penny, the shilling, the pound, the
hundred pounds, the ten thousand pounds, given for the
Lord's sake, and constrained by the love of Jesus, to poor
brethren, or in any way spent in the work of God, he
marks down in the book of remembrance, he considers as
laid up in heaven. The money is not lost, it is laid up in
262 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHA!. XVI.
the banJc of heaven ; yet so, that whilst an earthly bank
may break, or through earthly circumstances we may lose
our earthly possessions, the money which is thus secured
in heaven cannot be lost. But this is by no means the
only difference. I notice a few more points : Treasures
laid up on earth bring along with them many cares ; treas-
ures laid up in heaven never give care. Treasures laid up
on earth never can afford spiritual joy ; treasures laid up
in heaven bring along with them peace and joy in the
Holy Ghost even now. Treasures laid up on earth, in a
dying hour cannot afford peace and comfort, and when life
is over they are taken from us ; treasures laid up in heaven
draw forth thanksgiving that we were permitted and
counted worthy to serve the Lord with the means with
which he was pleased to intrust us as stewards, and when
this life is over we are not deprived of what was laid up
there, but when we go to heaven we go to the place where
our treasures are, and we shall find them there. Often we
hear it said, when a person has died, he died worth so much.
But whatever be the phrases common in the world, it is
certain that a person may die worth fifty thousand pounds
sterling, as the world reckons, and yet that individual may
not possess, in the sight of God, one thousand pounds
sterling, because he was not rich towards God, he did not
lay up treasure in heaven. And so, on the other hand, we
can suppose a man of God falling asleep in Jesus, and his
surviving widow finding scarcely enough left behind him
to suffice for the funeral, who was nevertheless rich towards
God : in the sight of God he may possess five thousand
pounds sterling, he may have laid up that sum in heaven.
Dear reader, does your soul long to be rich towards God,
to lay up treasures in heaven ? The world passes away,
and the lust thereof. Yet a little while and our steward-
ship will be taken from us. At present we have the
opportunity of serving the Lord with our time, our talents,
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 263
our bodily strength, our gifts, and also with our j roperty ;
but shortly this opportunity may cease. Oh, how shortly
may it cease ! Before ever this is read by any one, I may
have fallen asleep ; and the very next day after you have
read this, dear reader, you may fall asleep ; and, therefore,
whilst we have the opportunity, let us serve the Lord.
5. The Lord lastly adds : " For where your treasure is,
there will your heart be also." Where should the heart
of the disciple of the Lord Jesus be, but in heaven ? Our
calling is a heavenly calling, our inheritance is a heavenly
inheritance, and reserved for us in heaven ; our citizenship
is in heaven ; but if* we believers in the Lord Jesus lay up
treasures on earth, the necessary result of it is, that our
hearts will be upon earth ; nay, the very fact of our doing
so proves that they are there ! Nor will it be otherwise,
till there be a ceasing to lay up treasures upon earth. The
believer who lays up treasures upon earth may, at first, not
live openly in sin, he in a measure may yet bring some
honor to the Lord in certain things ; but the injurious ten-
dencies of this habit will show themselves more and more,
whilst the habit of laying up treasures in heaven would
draw the heart more and more heavenward; would be
continually strengthening his new, his divine nature, his
spiritual faculties, because it would call his spiritual facul-
ties into use, and thus they would be strengthened ; and
he would more and more, whilst yet in the body, have his
heart in heaven, and set upon heavenly things ; and thus
the laying up treasures in heaven would bring along with
it, even in this life, precious spiritual blessings as a reward
of obedience to the commandment of our Lord.
II. The next passage, on which I desire to make a few
remarks, is Matt. vi. 33 : " But seek ye first the kingdom
of God and his righteousness; and all these things shall
be added unto you." After our Lord, in the previous
verses, had been pointing his disciples " to the fowls of the
264 THE LIFE OF TRUST, CHAP XVI.
air," and "the lilies of the field," in order that they should
be without carefulness about the necessaries of life, he
adds: "Therefore take no thought (literally, be not
anxious), saying, What shall we eat? or, What shall we
drink? or, Wherewithal shall we be clothed? (for after
all these things do the Gentiles seek ;) for your heavenly
Father knoweth that ye have need of all these things."
Observe here particularly that we, the children of God,
should be different from the nations of the earth, from
those who have no Father in heaven, and who therefore
make it their great business, their first anxious concern,
what they shall eat, and what they shall drink, and where-
withal they shall be clothed. We, the children of God,
should, as in every other respect, so in this particular also,
be different from the world, and prove to the world that
we believe that we have a Father in heaven who knoweth
that we have need of all these things. The fact that our
Almighty Father, who is full of infinite love to us his chil-
dren, and who has proved to us his love in the gift of his
only-begotten Son, and his almighty power in raising him
from the dead, knows that we have need, of these things,
should remove all anxiety from our minds. There is, how-
ever, one thing that we have to attend to, and which we
ought to attend to, with reference to our temporal neces-
sities ; it is mentioned in our verse : "But seek ye first the
kingdom of God and his righteousness." The great busi-
ness which the disciple of the Lord Jesus has to be con-
cerned about (for this word was spoken to disciples, to
professed believers) is, to seek the kingdom of God, i. e.
to seek, as I view it, after the external and internal pros-
perity of the church of Christ. If, according to our ability,
and according to the opportunity which the Lord gives us,
we seek to win souls for the Lord Jesus, that appears to
me to be seeking the external prosperity of the kingdom
of God j and if we, as members of the body of Christ, seek
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 265
to benefit our fellow-members in the jody, helping them
on in grace and truth, or caring for them in any way to
their edification, that would be seeking the internal pros-
perity of the kingdom of God. But in connection with
this we have also " to seek his righteousness," which means
(as it was spoken to disciples, to those who have a Father
in heaven, and not to those who were without), to seek to
be more and more like God, to seek to be inwardly con-
formed to the mind of God. If these two things are
attended to (and they imply also that we are not slothful
in business), then do we come under that precious promise :
" And all these things (that is, food, raiment, or anything
else that is needful for this present life) shall be added
unto you." It is not for attending to these two things •
that we obtain the blessing, but in attending to them.
I now ask you, my dear reader, a few questions in all
love, because I do seek your welfare, and I do not wish to
put these questions to you without putting them first to
my own heart. Do you make it your primary business,
your first great concern, to seek the kingdom of God and
his righteousness ? Are the things of God, the honor of
his name, the welfare of his church, the conversion of sin-
ners, and the profit of your own soul, your chief aim ? Or
does your business, or your family, or your own temporal
concerns, in some shape or other primarily occupy your
attention? If the latter be the case, then, though you
may have all the necessaries of life, yet could you be sur-
prised if you had them not ? Remember that the world
r Nsseth away, but that the things of God endure forever.
I never knew a child of God, who acted according to the
xbove passage, in whose experience the Lord did not fulfil
his word of promise, " All these things shall be added
unto you."
III. Tlfe third portion of the divine testimony on
which I desire to throw out a few hints, is in 1 John L 3 :
266 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI
"And truly our fellowship is with the Father, and with his
Son Jesus Christ." Observe,
1. The words " fellowship," " communion," " copartici-
pation," and "partnership," mean the same.
2. The believer in the Lord Jesus does not only obtain
forgiveness of all his sins, as he does through the shedding
of the blood of Jesus, by faith in his name ; does not only
become a righteous one before God, through the righteous-
ness of the Lord Jesus, by faith in his name ; is not only
begotten again, born of God, and partaker of the divine
nature, and therefore a child of God and an heir of God ;
but he is also in fellowship or partnership with God. Now,
so far as it regards God, and our standing in the Lord
Jesus, we have this blessing once for all ; nor does it allow
of either an increase or a decrease. Just as God's love to
us believers, his children, is unalterably the same, what-
ever may be the manifestations of that love ; and as his
peace with us is the same, however much our peace may
be disturbed; so it is also with regard to our being in fel-
lowship or partnership with him : it remains unalterably
the same so far as God is concerned. But then,
3. There is an experimental fellowship, or partnership,
mth the Father and with his Son, which consists in this :
that all which we possess in God, as being the partners or
fellows of God, is brought down into our daily life, is en-
joyed, experienced, and used. This experimental fellow-
ehip, or partnership, allows of an increase or a decrease, in
the measure in which faith is in exercise, and in which we
are entering into what we have received in the Lord Jesus.
The measure in which we enjoy this experimental fellow-
ship with the Father and with the Son is without limit ;
for without limit we may make use of our partnership
with the Father and with the Son, and draw by prayer
and faith out of the inexhaustible fulness which there is
in God.
1844. STEWARDSHIP. ' 267
Let us now take a few instances in order to see the
practical working of this experimental fellowship, tfr part-
nership, with the Father and with the Son. Suppose
there are two believing parents who were not brought to
the knowledge of the truth until some years after the Lord
had given them several children. Their children were
bro- ;ht up in sinful, evil ways, whilst the parents did not
know tho Lord. Now the parents reap as they sowed.
They suffer from having set an evil example before their chil-
dren, for their children are unruly and behave most improp-
erly. What is now to be done ? Need such parents despair ?
No. The first thing they have to do is, to make confession of
their sins to God, with regard to neglecting their children
whilst they were themselves living in sin, and then to re-
member that they are in partnership with God, and there-
fore to be of good courage, though they are in themselves
still utterly insufficient for the task of managing their
children. They have in themselves neither the wisdom,
nor the patience, nor the long-suffering, nor the gentleness,
nor the meekness, nor the love, nor the decision and firm-
ness, nor anything else that may be needful in dealing with
their children aright. But their heavenly Father has all
this. The Lord Jesus possesses all this. And they are in
partnership with the Father, and with the Son, and there-
fore they can obtain by prayer and faith all they need out
of the fulness of God. I say by prayer and faith, for wr
have to make known our need to God in prayer, ask his helpj
and then we have to believe he will give us what we need.
Prayer alone is not enough. We may pray never so much,
yet, if we do not believe that God will give us what we
need, we have no reason to expect that we shall receive
what we have asked for. So then these parents would
need to ask God to give them the needful wisdom, patience,
long-suffering, gentleness, meekness, love, decision, and
firmness, and whatever else they may judge they need.
268 ' THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XYI
They may in humble boldness remind their heavenly
Father that his word assures them that they are in part-
nership with him, and, as they themselves are lacking in
these particulars, ask him to be pleased to supply their
need ; and then they have to believe that God will do it,
and they shall receive according to their need.
Another instance : Suppose I am so situated in my
business that day by day such difficulties arise that I
continually find that I take wrong steps by reason of these
great difficulties. How may the case be altered for the
better? In myself I see no remedy for the difficulties.
In looking at myself I can expect nothing but to make
still further mistakes, and, therefore, trial upon trial seems
to be before me. And yet I need not despair. The
living God is my partner. I have not sufficient wisdom
to meet these difficulties so as to be able to know what
steps to take, but he is able to direct me. What I have,
therefore, to do, is this : in simplicity to spread my case
before my heavenly Father and my Lord Jesus. The
Father and the Son are my partners. I have to tell out
my heart to God, and to ask him, that, as he is my
partner, and I have no wisdom in myself to meet all the
many difficulties which continually occur in my business,
he would be pleased to guide and direct me, and to supply
me with the needful wisdom ; and then I have to believe
that God will do so, and go with good courage to my
business, and expect help from him in the next difficulty
that may come before me. I have to look out for guidance,
I have to expect counsel from the Lord ; and as assuredly
as I do so, I shall have it, I shall find that I am not norni*
nally, but really, in partnership with the Father and with
the Son.
Another instance : There is a father and mother with
seven small children. Both parents are believers. The
father works in a manufactory, but cannot earn more thao
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 265
ten shillings per week. The mother cannot earn anything
These ten shillings are too little for the supply of nourish-
ing and wholesome food for seven growing children and
their parents, and for providing them with the other neces
saries of life. What is to be done in such a case ?
not to find fault with the manufacturer, who may not be
able to afford more wages, and much less to murmur
against God; but the parents have in simplicity to tell
God, their partner, that the wages of ten shillings a week
are not sufficient in England to provide nine persons with
all they need, so as that their health be not injured. They
have to remind God that he is not a hard master, not an
unkind being, but a most loving Father, who has abun-
dantly proved the love of his heart in the gift of his only
begotten Son. And they have in childlike simplicity to
ask him that either he would order it so that the manu-
facturer may be able to allow more wages ; or that he (the
Lord) would find them another place, where the father
would be able to earn more ; or that he would be pleased,
somehow or other, as it may seem good to him, to supply
them with more means. They have to ask the Lord, in
childlike simplicity, again and again for it, if he does not
answer their request at once ; and they have to believe that
God, their Father and partner, will give them the desire
of their hearts. They have to expect an answer to their
prayers ; day by day they have to look out for it, and to
repeat their request till God grants it. As assuredly as
they believe that God will grant them their request, so
assuredly it shall be granted.
Thus, suppose I desired more power over my besetting
sins ; suppose I desired more power against certain temp-
tations ; suppose I desired more wisdom, or grace, or any-
thing else that I may need in my service among the saints,
or in my service towards the unconverted : what have I to
do but to make use of my being in fellowship with the
23*
270 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAI-. XVI
Father and with the Son ? Just as, for instance, an old
faithful clerk, who is this day taken into partnership by an
immensely rich firm, though himself altogether without
property, would not be discouraged by reason of a large
payment having to be made by the firm within three days,
though he himself has no money at all of his own, but
would comfort himself with the immense riches possessed
by those who so generously have just taken him into part-
nership : so should we, the children of God and servants
of Jesus Christ, comfort ourselves by being in fellowship,
or partnership, with the Father, and with the Son, though
we have no power of our own against our besetting sins ;
though we cannot withstand temptations, which are before
us, in our own strength ; and though we have neither suffi-
cient grace nor wisdom for our service among the saints,
or towards the unconverted. All we have to do is, to
draw upon our partner, the living God. By prayer and
faith we may obtain all needful temporal and spiritual help
and blessings. In all simplicity have we to tell out our
heart before God, and then we have to believe that he will
give to us according to our need.
But if we do not believe that God will help us, could we
be at peace ? The clerk, taken into the firm as partner,
believes that the firm will meet the payment, though so
large, and though in three days it is to be made, and it is
this that keeps his heart quiet, though altogether poor him-
self. We have to believe that our infinitely rich partner,
the living God, will help us in our need, and we shall not
only be in peace, but we shall actually find that the help
which we need will be granted to us. Let not the con-
sciousness of your entire unworthiness keep you, dear
reader, from believing what God has said concerning you.
If you are indeed a believer in the Lord Jesus, then this
precious privilege, of being in partnership with the Father
and the Son, is yours, though you and I are entirely
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 271
unworthy of it. If the consciousness of our unworthiness
were to keep us from believing what God has said con-
cerning those who depend upon and trust in the Lord
Jesus for salvation, then we should find that there is not
one single blessing, with which we have been blessed in
the Lord Jesus, from which, on account of our uu worthi-
ness, we could derive any settled comfort or peace.
IV. There is one- other point, which, in connection with
several portions of the word of God which bear on the
Bubject, I desire to bring before the believing reader, and
it refers to the " scriptural way of overcoming the difficul-
ties with which the believer now meets who is engaged in
a business, trade, profession, or any earthly calling what-
ever, which arise from competition in business, too great a
number of persons being occupied in the same calling,
stagnation of trade, and the like." The children of God,
who are strangers and pilgrims on earth, have at all times
had difficulty in the world, for they are not at home, but
from home ; nor should they, until the return of the Lord
Jesus, expect it to be otherwise with them. But whilst
this is true, it is also true that the Lord 'has provided us in
all our difficulties with something in his own word to meet
them. All difficulties may be overcome by acting accord-
ing to the word of God. At this time I more especially
desire to point out the means whereby the children of God
who are engaged ir any earthly calling may be able to
overcome the difficulties which arise from competition in
business, too great a number of persons being occupied in
the same calling, stagnation of trade, and the like.
1. The first thing which the believei who is in such
difficulties has to ask himself is, Am I in a calling in which
I can abide with God? If our occupation be of that
kind that w^ cannot ask God's blessing upon it, or that we
should be ashamed to be found in it at the appearing of the
Lord Jesus, or that it of necessity hinders our spiritual
272 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVT.
progress, then we must give it up, and be engaged iji
something else ; but in few cases only this is needful. Far
the greater part of the occupations in which believers are
engaged are not of such a nature as that they need to give
them up in order to maintain a good conscience, and in
order to be able to walk with God, though, perhaps, certain
alterations may need to be made in the manner of con-
ducting their trade, business, or profession. About these
parts of our calling which may need alteration, we shall
receive instruction from the Lord if we indeed desire it,
and wait upon him for it, and expect it from him.
2. Now suppose the believer is in a calling in which he
can abide with God, the next point to be settled is, " Why
do I carry on this business, or why am I engaged in this
trade or profession f " In most instances, so far as my
experience goes, which I have gathered in my service
among the saints during the last fifteen years and a half
[i. e. in 1845], I believe the answer would be, "I ain
engaged in my earthly calling that I may earn the means
of obtaining the necessaries of life for myself and family."
Here is the chief error from which almost all the rest of
the errors which are entertained by children of God, rela-
tive to their calling, spring. It is no right and scriptural
motive to be engaged in a trade or business or profession
merely in order to earn the means for the obtaining of the
necessaries of life for ourselves and family, but we should
loorJc because it is the Lord^s will concerning us. This is
plain from the following passages : 1 Thess. iv. 11, 12 ;
2 Thess. iii. 10-12 ; Eph. iv. 28. It is quite true that, in
general, the Lord provides the necessaries of life by means
of our ordinary calling ; but that that is not THE REASON
why we should work, is plain enough from the considera-
tion that if our possessing the necessaries of life depended
upon our ability of working, we could never have freedom
from anxiety, for we should always have to say to our-
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 273
selves, And what shall I do when I am too old to woik, or
when by reason of sickness I am unable to earn my bread?
But if, on the other hand, we are engaged in our earthly
calling because it is the will of the Lord concerning m
that we should work, and that thus laboring we may pro-
vide for our families, and also be able to support the weab
the sick, the aged, and the needy, then we have good and
scriptural reason to say to ourselves, Should it please the
Lord to lay me on a bed of sickness, or keep me otherwise
by reason of infirmity, or old age, or want of employment,
from earning my bread by means of the labor of my
hands, or my business, or my profession, he will yet pro-
vide for me. Because we who believe are servants of
Jesus Christ, who has bought us with his own precious
blood, and are not our own, and because this our precious
Lord and Master has commanded us to work, therefore we
work : and in doing so our Lord will provide for us, but
whether in this way or any other way he is sure to provide
for us, for we labor in obedience to him ; and if even a
just earthly master give wages to his servants, the Lord
will surely see to it that we have our wages, if, in obedi-
ence to him, we are engaged in our calling, and not for our
own sake.
How great the difference between acting according to
the word of God and according to our own natural desires,
or the customs of the world, will be plain, I trust, by the
following case : Suppose I were engaged in some useful
trade. Suppose I had the certain human prospect that
within the next three months my labor would bring me
in nothing, for certain reasons connected with the state of
mercantile affairs. As a man of the world I should say,
I shall not work at all, because my labor will not be paid ;
but as a Christian, who desires to act according to God's
holy word, I ought to say, My trade is useful to society,
and I will work, notwithstanding all human prospects,
274 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVI
because the Lord Jesus has commanded me to labor ; from
him, and not from my trade, I expect my wages. In addi-
tion to this, the Christian ought also to say, Idleness is a
dreadful snare of the devil ; he has especial opportunity to
get an advantage over the children of God when they are
unoccupied ; and, therefore, I will work though I have no
human prospect of obtaining payment for my labor, but
shall get only the cost price of the material, and shall have
to give my work for nothing. Moreover, the Christian
ought to say, Though according to human probability I
shall have to labor for nothing during the next three
months, yet I will work, because the Lord may speedily
alter the state of things, contrary to all human expecta-
tion ; but whether he be pleased to do so or not, I labor
because I am the Lord's, bought by his precious blood, and
he commands me to labor.
But there are motives still lower than to be engaged in
our earthly calling merely that we may earn the means of
obtaining the necessaries of life, why even Christians, true
children of God, may be engaged in their calling, such as,
to obtain a certain sum of money, and then to retire from
business and to live upon the interest ; or to provide
something for old age ; or to obtain a certain amount of
property, without intending to give up business. If it be
unscriptural to be engaged in our calling merely even for
the sake of earning the means for procuring the necessa-
ries of life for ourselves and family, how much more unbe-
coming that a child of God should be engaged in his
calling for the sake of any of the last-mentioned reasons.
This second point, then, Why do I carry on this busi-
ness? Why am I engaged in this trade or profession?
ought first to be settled in the fear of God, and according
to the revealed will of God ; and if we cannot say, in hon-
esty of heart, I do carry on my business, I am engaged in
my trade, or art, or profession, as a servant of Jesus Christ,
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 275
whose I am, because he has bought me with his precious
blood, and he has commanded me to work, and therefore
I work, — I say, if we cannot say this in honesty of heart,
but must confess that we work on account of lower motives,
such as that we may earn our bread, or on account of still
lower motives, and such as are altogether unbecoming a
child of God, who is not of the world, but of God, such as
to obtain a certain sum of money in order to be able to
live on the interest without having to work, or to provide
something for old age, or to obtain a certain amount of
property without intending to give up business ; — if these
are our motives for being engaged in our calling, I say, can
we be surprised that we meet with great difficulties in our
business, and that the Lord in his abounding love to us,
his erring children, does not allow us to succeed ? But
suppose this second point is scripturally settled, and we
can honestly say that, because we are servants of Jesus
Christ, we are occupied as we are ; we have further to
consider, —
3. Whether we carry on our business, or are engaged
in our trade, art, or profession, as stewards of the Lord.
To the child of God it ought not to be enough that he is
in a calling in which he can abide with God, nor that he is
engaged in his calling because it is the will of his Lord
and Master that he should work, but he should consider
himself in his trade, business, art, or profession, only as the
steward of the Lord with reference to his income. The
child of God has been bought with the precious blood of
the Lord Jesus, and is altogether his property, with all
that he possesses, his bodily strength, his mental strength,
his ability of every kind, his trade, business, art, or profes-
sion, his property, etc. ; for it is written, " Ye are not
your own ; for ye are bought with a price." 1 Cor. vi.
19, 20. The proceeds of our calling are therefore not
our own in the sense of using them as our natural heart
276 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI
wishes us to do, whether to spend them on the gratifica-
tion of our pride, or our love of pleasure, or sensual in-
dulgences, or to lay by the money for ourselves or our
children, or use it in any way as we naturally like, but
we have to stand before our Lord and Master, whose stew-
ards we are, to seek to ascertain his will, how he will have
us use the proceeds of our calling.
But is this indeed the spirit in which children of God
generally are engaged in their calling ? It is but too well
known that it is not the case ! Can we then wonder at it,
that even God's own dear children should so often be
found greatly in difficulty with regard to their calling, and
be found so often complaining about stagnation or competi-
tion in trade, and the difficulties of the times, though there
have been given to them such precious promises as, " Seek
ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness, and
all these things shall be added unto you ; " or, " Let your
conversation (disposition or turn of mind) be without
covetousness ; and be content with such things as ye have :
for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee."
Heb. xiii. 5. Is it not obvious enough that when our
heavenly Father sees that we his children do or w^ould
use- the proceeds of our calling, as our natural mind would
desire, that he either cannot at all intrust us with means,
or will be obliged to decrease them ? No wise and really
affectionate mother will permit her infant to play with a
razor, or with fire, however much the child may desire to
have them ; and so the love and wisdom of our heavenly
Father will not, cannot, intrust us with pecuniary means^
except it be in the way of chastisement^ or to show us
finally their utter vanity, if he sees that we do not desire
to possess them as stewards for him, in order that we may
spend them as he may point out to us by his Holy Spirit,
through his word.
In connection with this subject, I give a few hints to the
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 277
believing reader on three passages of the word of God.
In 1 Cor. xvi. 2, we find it written to the brethren at Cor-
inth, " Upon the first day of the week let every one of
you lay by him in store, as God has prospered him." A
contribution for the poor saints in Judea was to be made,
and the brethren at Corinth were exhorted to put by for
it, every Lord's day, according to the measure of success
which the Lord had been pleased to grant them in their
calling during the week. Now, ought not the saints in
our day also to act according to this word ? There is no
passage in the word of God why we should not do so, and
it is altogether in accordance with our pilgrim character,
not only once or twice, or four times a year, to see how
much we can afford to give to the poor saints, or to the
work of God in any way, but to seek to settle it weekly.
If it be said, I cannot ascertain how much I have gained
in the course of the week by my business, and therefore I
cannot give accordingly; my reply is this, Seek, dear
brethren, as much as possible, to bring your business upon
such a footing as that you may be able, as nearly as pos-
sible, to settle how much you have earned in your calling
in the course of the week. But suppose you should be un-
able to settle it exactly to the shilling or pound, yet you
will know pretty well how it has been with you during the
week, and therefore, according to your lest knowledge, con-
tribute on the coming Lord's day towards the necessities
of the poor saints, and towards the work of God, as he,
after your having sought his guidance, may lead you.
Perhaps you say, the weeks are so unlike ; in one week
I may earn three or even ten times as much as in anothei
week, and if I give according to my earnings from m^
calling during a very good week, then how are such week?
when I earn scarcely any thing, or how are the bad debtj
to be met? How shall I do when sickness befalls my
family, or when other trials productive of expense come
24
278 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVL
upon me, if I do not make provision for such seasons ?
My reply is, 1. I do not find in the whole New Testament
one single passage in which either directly or indirectly
exhortations are given to provide against deadness in
business, bad debts, and sickness, by laying up money. 2.
Often the Lord is obliged to allow deadness in business,
or bad debts, or sickness in our family, or other trials
which increase our expenses, to befall us, because we do
not, as his stewards, act according to stewardship, but as if
we were owners of what we have, forgetting that the
time has not yet come when we shall enter upon our pos-
sessions ; and he does so in order that, by these losses
and expenses, our property which we have collected may
be decreased, lest we should altogether set our hearts
again upon earthly things, and forget God entirely. His
love is so great, that he will not let his children quietly
go their own way when they have forsaken him ; but if
his loving admonitions by his Holy Spirit are disregarded,
he is obliged in fatherly love to chastise them. A striking
illustration of what I have said we have in the case of
Israel nationally. The commandment to them was, to
leave their land uncultivated in the seventh year, in order
that it might rest, and the Lord promised to make up for
this deficiency by his abundant blessing resting upon the
sixth year. However, Israel acted not according to this
commandment, no doubt saying, in the unbelief of their
hearts, as the Lord had foretold, " What shall we eat in
the seventh year? Behold, we shall not sow, nor gather
in our increase." Levit. xxv. But what did the Lord do ?
He was determined the land should have rest, and as the
Israelites did not willingly give it, he sent them for seventy
years into captivity, in order that thus the land might have
rest. See Levit. xxvi. 33-35. Beloved brethren in the
Lord, let us take heed so to walk as that the Lord may
not be obliged by chastisement to take a part of our earthl j
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 279
possessions from us in the way of bad debts, sickness, de-
crease of business, and the like, because we would not own
our position as stewards, but act as owners, and keep for
ourselves the means with which the Lord had intrusted us,
not for the gratification of our own carnal mind, but for
the sake of using them in his service and to his praise.
It might also be said by a brother whose earnings are
small, should /also give according to my earnings ? They
are already so small that my wife can only with the great-
est difficulty manage to make them sufficient for the family.
My reply is, Have you ever considered, my brother, that
the very reason why the Lord is obliged to let your earn-
ings remain so small may be the fact of your spending
everything upon yourselves, and that if he were to give
you more you would only use it to increase your own
family comfort, instead of looking about to see who among
the brethren are sick, or who have no work at all, that you
might help them, or how you might assist the work of God
at home or abroad ? There is a great temptation for a
brother whose earnings are small to put off the responsi-
bility of assisting the needy and sick saints, or helping on
the work of God, and to lay it upon the few rich brethren
and sisters with whom he is associated in fellowship, and
thus rob his own soul !
It might be asked, How much shall I give of my income ?
The tenth part, or the fifth part, or the third part, or one
half, or more ? My reply is, God lays down no rule con-
cerning this point. What we do we should do cheerfully
and not of necessity. But if even Jacob, with the first
dawning of spiritual light (Genesis xxviii. 22), promised
to God the tenth of all he should give to him, how much
ought we believers in the Lord Jesus to do for him : we,
whose calling is a heavenly one, and icJio Jcnow distinctly
that we are children of God, and joint heirs with the Lord
Jesus ! Yet do all the children of God give even the tenth
280 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI
part of what the Lord gives them ? That would be two
shillings per week for the brother who earns one pound,
and four shillings to him who earns two pounds, and two
pounds per week to him whose income is twenty pounds
per week.
In connection with 1 Cor. xvi. 2, 1 would mention two
other portions : 1. " He which soweth sparingly shall reap
also sparingly ; and he that soweth bountifully shall reap
also bountifully." 2 Cor. ix. 6. It is certain that we chil-
dren of God are so abundantly blessed in Jesus, by the
grace of God, that we ought to need no stimulus to good
works. The forgiveness of our sins, the having been
made forever the children of God, the having before us
the Father's house as our home; — these blessings ought to
be sufficient motives to constrain us in love and gratitude
to serve God abundantly all the days of our life, and cheer-
fully also to give up, as he may call for it, that with which
he has intrusted us of the things of this world. But whilst
this is the case, the Lord nevertheless holds out to us in
his holy word motives why we should serve him, deny
ourselves, use our property for him, etc., and the last men-
tioned passage is one of that kind. The verse is true, both
with reference to the life that is now, and that which is to
come. If we have been sparingly using our property for
him, there will have been little treasure laid up in heaven,
and therefore a 'small amount of capital will be found in
the world to come, so far as it regards reaping. Again,
we shall reap bountifully if we seek to be rich towards
< *od, by abundantly using our means for him, whether in
ministering to the necessities of the poor saints, or using
otherwise our pecuniary means for his work. Dear breth-
ren, these things are realities ! Shortly, very shortly, will
come the reaping-time, and then will be the question
whether we shall reap sparingly or bountifully.
But while this passage refers to the life hereafter, it also
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 281
refers to the life that now is. Just as now the k\ve of
Clwist constrains us to communicate of that with which
the Lord intrusts us, so will be the present reaping, both
with regard to spiritual and temporal things. Should
there be found, therefore, in a brother, the want of entering
into his position as being merely a steward for the Lord in
his calling, and should he give no heed to the admonitions
of the Holy Ghost to communicate to those who are in
need or to help the work of God, then can such a brother
be surprised that he meets with great difficulties in his
calling, and that he cannot get on ? This is according to
the Lord's word. He is sowing sparingly, and he therefore
reaps sparingly. But should the love of Christ constrain
a brother, out of the earnings of his calling, to sow bounti-
fully, he will even in this life reap bountifully, both with
regard to blessings in his soul, and with regard to temporal
things. Consider in connection with this the following
passage, which, though taken from the Book of Prov-
erbs, is not of a Jewish character, but true concerning be-
lievers under the present dispensation also : " There is that
scattereth, and yet increaseth ; and there is that with-
holdeth more than is meet, but it tendeth to poverty. The
liberal soul shall be made fat ; and he that watereth shall
be watered also himself." Prov. xi. 24, 25.
In connection with 1 Cor. xvi. 2, 1 would also direct my
brethren in the Lord to the promise made in Luke vi. 38 :
"Give, and it shall be given unto you; good measure,
pressed down, and shaken together, and running over, shall
men give into your bosom. For with the same measure
that ye mete withal it shall be measured to you again."
This refers evidently to the present dispensation, and evi-
dently in its primary meaning to temporal things. Now
let any one, constrained by the love of Jesus, act accord-
ing to this passage ; let him on the first day of the week
communicate as the Lord has prospered him, and he will
24*
282 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI
see thi.1 the Lord will act according to what is contained
in this verse. If pride constrain us to give, if self-right-
eousness make us liberal, if natural feeling induce us to
communicate, or if we give whilst we are in a state of in-
solvency, not possessing more perhaps than ten shillings in
the pound, were our creditors to come upon us ; then we
cannot expect to have this verse fulfilled in our experience ;
nor should we give at any time for the sake of receiving
again from others, according to this verse ; but if indeed
the love of Christ constrain us to communicate according
to the ability which the Lord gives us, then we shall have
this verse fulfilled in our experience, though this was not
the motive which induced us to give. Somehow or other
the Lord will abundantly repay us, through the instrumen-
tality of our fellow-men, what we are doing to his poor
saints, or in any way for his work, and we shall find that
in the end we are not losers, even with reference to tem-
poral things, whilst we communicate liberally of the things
of this life with which the Lord has intrusted us.
Here it might be remarked, But if it be so that even in
this life, and with regard to temporal things, it is true that
" to him that gives shall be given, good measure, pressed
down, and shaken together, and running over," and that
"he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully,"
then in the end the most liberal persons would be ex-
ceedingly rich. Concerning this remark we have to keep
in mind, that the moment persons were to begin to give
for the sake of receiving more back again from the Lord,
through the instrumentality of their fellow-men, than they
have given ; or the moment persons wished to alter their
way, and no more go on sowing bountifully, but spar-
ingly, in order to increase their possessions, whilst God is
allowing, them to reap bountifully, the river of God's
bounty toward them would no longer continue to flow.
God had supplied them abundantly with means, because he
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 283
Baw them act as stewards for him. He had intrusted tncm
with a little which they had used for him, and he therefore
intrusted them with more ; and if they had continued to
use the much also for him, he would have still more abun-
dantly used them as instruments to scatter abroad his
bounties. The child of God must be willing to be a chan-
nel through which God's bounties flow, both with regard
to temporal and spiritual things. This channel is narrow
and shallow at first, it may be ; yet there is room for some
of the waters of God's bounty to pass through. And if
we cheerfully yield ourselves as channels for this purpose,
then the channel becomes wider and deeper, and the
waters of the bounty of God can pass through more
abundantly. Without a figure, it is thus : At first, we may
be only instrumental in communicating five pounds, or ten
pounds, or twenty pounds, or fifty pounds, or one hundred
pounds, or two hundred pounds per year, but afterwards
double as much ; and, if we are still more faithful in our
stewardship, after a year or two four times as much,
afterwards perhaps eight times as much, at last perhaps
twenty times or fifty times as much. We cannot limit
the extent to which God may use us as instruments in
communicating blessing, both temporal and spiritual, if we
are willing to yield ourselves as instruments to the living
God, and are content to be only instruments, and to give
him all the glory.
But with regard to temporal things it will be thus, that
if indeed we walk according to the mind of God in these
things, whilst more and more we become instruments of
blessing to others, we shall not seek to enrich ourselves,
but be content, when the last day of another year finds us
Btill in the body, to possess no more than on the last day
of the previous year, or even considerably less, whilst we
have been, however, in the course of the year, the instru-
ments of communicating largely to others, through the
284 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI,
means with which the Lord had intrusted us. As to ray
own soul, by the grace of God, it would be a burden to me
that however much my income in the course of the year
might have been, I were increasing in earthly possession ;
for it would be a plain proof to me that I had not been
acting as a steward for God, and had not been yielding
myself as a channel for the waters of God's bounty to pass
through. I also cannot but bear my testimony here, that
in whatever feeble measure God has enabled me to act
according to these truths for the last fifteen years [this was
written in 1845], I have found it to be profitable, most
profitable to my own soul ; and as to temporal things,
I never was a loser in doing so, but I have most abun-
dantly found the truth in 2 Cor. ix. 6, and Luke vi. 38, and
Prov. xi. 24, 25, verified in my own experience. I only
have to regret that I have acted so little according to what
I have now been stating ; but my godly purpose is by the
help of God, to spend the remainder of my days in prac-
tising these truths more than ever ; and I am sure that
when I am brought to the close of my earthly pilgrimage,
either in death, or by the appearing of our Lord Jesus, I
shall not have the least regret in having done so ; and I
know that, should I leave my dear child behind, the Lord
will abundantly provide for her, and prove that there has
been a better provision made for her than her father could
have made, if he had sought to insure his life or lay up
money for her.
Before leaving this part of the subject, I mention to the
believing reader, that I know instance upon instance in
which what I have been saying has been verified, but I
will only mention the following : I knew many years ago
a brother as the manager of a large manufactory. Whilst
in this capacity he was liberal, and giving away consider-
ably out of his rather considerable salary. The Lord
repaid this to him ; for the principals of the establishment,
1844. STEWAEDJHIP.
well knowing his value to their house of business, gave
him now and then, whilst he thus was liberally using his
means for the Lord, very large presents in money. In
process of time, however, this brother thought it right to
begin business on his own account, in a very small way.
He still continued to be liberal, according to his means,
and God prospered him, and prospered him so that now,
whilst I am writing, his manufactory is as large as the
one which he formerly managed, or even larger, though
that was a very considerable one. And sure I am that
if this brother shall be kept by God from setting his
heart upon earthly things, and from seeking more and
more to increase his earthly riches, but shall delight him-
self in being used as a steward by God, cheerfully commu-
nicating to the need of God's poor children, or to his work
in other ways, and doing so not sparingly, but bountifully,
the Lord will intrust him more and more with means; if
otherwise, if he shut up his hands, seek his own, wish to
obtain sufficient property that lie may be able to live on
his interest, then what he has to expect is that God will
shut up his hands, he will meet with heavy losses, or there
will be an alteration in his affairs for the worse, or the like,
I also mention two other cases, to show that the Lord
increases our ability of communicating temporal blessings
to others if we distribute according to the means with
which he has intrusted us, though we should not be in a
trade or business or profession. I know a brother who
many years ago saw it right not only to spend his interest
for the Lord, but also the principal, as the Lord might
point out to him opportunities. His desire was not, as
indeed it ought never to be, to get rid of his money as fast
as possible, yet he considered himself a steward for the
Lord, and was therefore willing, as his Lord and Master
might point it out to him, to spend his means. When
this brother came to this determination, he possessed about
286 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVI
twenty thousand pounds sterling. According to the light
and grace which the Lord had been pleased to give, he
afterwards acted, spending the money for the Lord, in
larger or smaller sums, as opportunities were pointed out
to him by the Lord. Thus the sum more and more de-
creased, whilst the brother steadily pursued his course,
serving the Lord with his property, and spending his time
and ability also for the Lord, in service of one kind or an-
other among his children. At last, the twenty thousand
pounds were almost entirely spent, when at that very time
the father of this very brother died, whereby he came into
the possession of an income of several thousand pounds a
year. It gives joy to my heart to be able to add, that this
brother still pursues his godly course, living in the most
simple way, and giving away perhaps ten times as much
as he spends on himself or family. Here you see, dear
reader, that this brother, using faithfully for the Lord what
he had been intrusted with at first, was made steward over
more ; for he has now more than one third as much in a
year coming in as he at first possessed altogether.
I mention another instance : I know a brother to whom
the Lord has given a liberal heart, and who bountifully
gave of that over which the Lord had set him as steward.
The Lord, seeing this, intrusted him with still more, for
through family circumstances he came into the possession
of many thousand pounds, in addition to the considerable
property he possessed before. I have the joy of being
able to add also concerning this brother, that the Lord
continues to give him grace to use his property as a stew-
ard for God, and that he has not been permitted to set his
heart upon his riches, through the very considerable
increase of his property, but that he continues to live as
the steward of the Lord, and not as the owner of all thia
wealth.
And now, dear reader, when the brethren to whom 1
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 287
have been referring are brought to the close of their
earthly pilgrimage, will they have one moment's regret
that they have used their property for the Lord ? Will it
be the least particle of uneasiness to their minds, or will
their children be the worse for it ? O no ! The only
regret they will have concerning this matter will be, that
they did not serve the Lord still more abundantly with
their property. Dear reader, let us each in our measure
act in the same spirit. Money is really worth no more
than as it is used according to the mind of the Lord ; and
life is worth no more than as it is spent in the service of
the Lord.
Whilst the three points mentioned — 1. That our calling
must be of that nature that we can abide in it with God ;
2. That unto the Lord we should labor in our calling, as
his servants^ because he has bought us with his blood, and
because he will have us to labor ; 3. That as stewards we
should labor in our calling, because the earnings of our
calling are the Lord's and not our own, as he has bought
us with his blood; — I say, whilst these three points are
particularly to be attended to in order that the Lord's
blessing may rest upon our calling, and we be prospering
in it, there are, nevertheless, some other points to be
attended to, which I mention in love to my brethren in
the Lord, by whom they may be needed.
4. The next point is, that a believer in the Lord Jesus
should do nothing in his calling which is purely for the
sake of attracting the world ; such as, for instance, fitting
up his shop or rooms of business in the most costly man-
ner. I do not in the least mean to say that his shop or
rooms of business should not be clean, orderly, and of such
a character as that there may be no positive hindrance in
persons going there. All the needful conveniences that
are expected may be there, and ought to be there. But
if any child of God seek to have the front of his shop, or
288 THE. LIFE v.T TRUST. CHAP. XVI.
the interior of his shop, or of his place of business, fitted
up in a most expensive way, simply for the sake of at-
tracting attention, then let him be aware that, just in so
far as he is trusting in these things, he is not likely to
succeed in his calling, because he puts the manner of
fitting up the shop in the room of trust in the Lord.
Such things the Lord may allow to succeed in the case of
an unbeliever, but they will not prosper in the case of a
child of God, except it be in the way of chastisement, just
as the Lord gave to Israel in the wilderness the desire of
their hearts, but sent leanness into their souls. Should
any brother have fallen into this error, the first thing he has
to do, when the Lord has instructed him concerning this
point, is to make confession of sin, and, as far as it can be
done, to retrace his steps in this particular. If this cannot
be done, then to cast himself upon the mercy of God in
Christ Jesus.
5. Of the same character is, to seek to attract the
attention of the world by " boasting advertisements," such
as 4'no one manufactures so good an article," "no one sells
this article so cheap," " we sell the best article in the city,"
etc. Suppose these statements were quite correct, yet
they are unbecoming for a child of God, who has the living
God to care for him and to provide for him, and therefore
needs not to make use of such boasting, whereby he may
seek to insure custom to himself and keep it from others.
The law of love is, " Whatsoever ye would that men
should do to you, do ye even so to them." Matt. vii. 12.
Now what do I wish in this particular that others should
do to me, but that they should not seek to keep away per-
sons from dealing with me ; but if I use such like expres-
sions in my advertisements, as have been mentioned, what
do they imply but that I wish all people should come to
mcr and deal with me ? If, however, already under the
old covenant it was said, " Thou shalt not covet," how
1844. STEWARDSHIP. 289
much more sinful and altogether unbecoming is it for us
children of God, who afe in fellowship with the Father
and the Son, to make use of such means in order to in-
sure to ourselves pecuniary advantages. But, however
much the Lord may allow a man of the world to -prosper
in using such means, they are only hindrances to the child
of God to getting on in his calling, because the Lord sees
that they are substituted instead of trust in himself; and
should the Lord for a season allow his child apparently to
be benefited by them, it will only be for his chastisement
and connected with leanness in his soul. Therefore, my
brethren in the Lord, I beseech you to put away all these
things out of your calling, lest you should be hindering
instead of furthering your real welfare.
6. Likewise of a similar character is the following point,
which God may suffer to be a real hindrance to his chil-
dren in their calling ; it is, To seek the very best, and
therefore the most expensive, situations which can be had
in a town or city. Now, I do by no means intend to say,
that in our trade, business, art, or profession, we should
seek the most obscure, retired, out of the way place pos-
sible, and say, " God will provide, and I need not mind in
what part of the town I carry on my calling." There are
most assuredly certain things to be considered. The per-
sons who are likely to buy the articles I sell, or employ
me, are to be considered, and I have not to say, it matters
nothing to me whether I make them come a mile or two
to my house, or to the most dirty and disagreeable part of
the town ; this would be the extreme in the other way.
But whilst there is a certain consideration to be used with
reference to those who may employ us in our calling, yet if
the trust of the child of God respecting temporal prosperity
is in the fact that he lives in the best situation, the Lord will
surely disappoint him. He will have to pay a very high
rent for the best situation, and yet not succeed, because his
25
290 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVI.
trust is in the best situation. He is substituting it for de-
pendence upon the living God for customers. He is rob-
bing his soul, not only in not taking the customers as from
the hands of the Lord, but he is also obliging his heavenly
Father, in the very love of his heart, to cause him to be
disappointed, because he is not trusting in him. If the
child of God were saying and acting thus : the best situa-
tion would cost me fifty pounds a year more rent than one
which is not really inconvenient for my customers, nor in
an improper neighborhood, and the like ; this fifty pounds
I dedicate unto the Lord, to be paid in instalments for his
work or his poor saints, whenever the rent-day comes ;
such a brother would find himself to be no loser, if this
indeed were done in dependence upon the Lord, and con-
strained by the love of Jesus. But if the fifty pounds
more is paid for rent, and yet the living God, in the very
love of his heart, should be obliged to withhold prosperity
from his child in his calling, because he sees that he is lay-
ing undue stress upon the situation of the house, then not
only the fifty pounds extra rent per year is lost, but also
that which the Lord is obliged to withhold from his child
besides, in order to teach him the lesson ; and thus year
after year, by our own fault, we may have scarcely any*
thing to give for the work of God.
? The next obstacle to prosperity in our calling which
I now would mention is, That children of God often use
such expressions as these with reference to their calling :
" This is our busy time," or " This is our dead time ;" which
implies that they do not day after day deal with God about
their calling, but that they ascribe their having much or
little to do to circumstances, or to times and seasons. That
the people of the world should do so is not to be wondered
at ; but that the children of God should act thus, who in
the most minute affairs of life should seek the help of God,
and deal with God about them, is a matter of sorrow to
1844, STEWARDSHIP. 291
the spiritual mind, and is altogether unbecoming saints.
But what is the result ? The Lord, according to the ex-
pectations of his children, allows them to be without em-
ployment, because they say, " This is our dead season."
" He did not many mighty works there because of their un-
belief," contains a truth which comes in here. But what ia
the right way of looking at the matter ? It is this : the
child of God should say, though generally about this time
of the year there is little employment to be expected,
looking at it naturally, just as want of employment is
neither good for the outward nor inward man, and as I
only desire employment to serve God in my business, to
have to give to those who are in need, or help in other
ways the work of God, I will now give myself to prayer
for employment, for I can by prayer and faith as a child
of God obtain blessings from my heavenly Father, though
not in the ordinary course of things. If thus the child of
God were to say and to act, he would soon have employ-
ment in his calling, except the Lord meant to use his time
otherwise in his work, which he would point out to him.
8. A further reason why God may be obliged to resist
children of God in their business, may be this, that they
with the greatest carefulness seek to obtain persons for
their shop who are considered " good salesmen," i. e. per-
sons who have such persuasive ways, as that they gain an
advantage over the customers and induce them not only
to buy articles for which they ask, whether suitable or not,
but that they also induce them to buy articles which they
did not at all intend to buy when they came to the shop,
Concerning this I notice, in the first place, that if the
child of God puts his dependence upon the " good sales-
men," let him not be surprised if his heavenly Father
should be obliged to disappoint him, because he sees his
child lean upon the arm of flesh, instead of trusting in the
living God j and therefore the business does not succeed.
292 THE LIFE OF TRUST. . CHAP. XVI.
Further, it is altogether wrong for a child of God to in-
duce the customers, by means of such men or women who
have a persuasive tongue, to purchase articles whether
they suit or not, and whether they are needed or not.
This is no less than defrauding persons in a subtle way, or
leading them into the sin of purchasing beyond their means,
or at least spending their money needlessly. However
such sinful tricks may be allowed to prosper in the case of
a man of the world, in the case of a child of God they
will not prosper, except God allow them to do so in the
way of chastisement, whilst leanness and wretchedness are
brought into the soul. I knew a case of this kind where
it was the whole bent of the mind of a professed believer
to obtain such " good salesmen," and where even a Jew
was kept outside the shop, walking up and down, to induce
persons to come in and buy ; and yet that same professed
believer failed twice in his business.
9. Another evil with reference to business, and why
children of God do not get on in their calling, is, that they
enter upon business often without any capital at all, or
with too little. If a believer has no capital at all, or only
a very small capital, in comparison with what his business
requires, then ought he not to say this to himself : " If
it were my heavenly Father's will that I should enter
upon business on my own account, then would he not
somehow or other have intrusted me with the needfuL
means ? And since he has not, is it not a plain indication
that for the present I should remain a journeyman (or
shopman, or clerk, as the case may be) ? " In a variety
of ways the means might come. For instance, a legacy
might be left to him, or money might be given to him by
a brother in the Lord for that very purpose, or a brother
or sister might propose to the individual to lend him
money, yet so that if he were unable to pay it again they
would iiot consider him their debtor. But if in some
1844. STEWAEDSHIP. 291
such way the Lord did not remove the hindrance, and
the brother would still go into business, he would, through
the bill system and other things connected with the want
of capital, not only bring great distress into his mind, and
subject himself to the possibility of at last being unable to
pay his creditors, whereby dishonor would be brought
upon the name of the Lord, but he likewise could not be
surprised (as he went into business contrary to the will of
God, since he pointed out to him that he was not to do so
for want of means) if he should find that he cannot get
on, and that the blessing of God manifestly is wanting.
In such a case as this, if it can be done, the retracing our
steps is the best thing we can do ; but often this cannot
be done, as others are involved in the matter, and then we
have to make acknowledgment of our sin, and seek God's
merciful help to bring us into a right position.
10. But suppose all these nine previous points were at-
tended to, and we neglected to seek GocTs blessing upon
our calling, we need still not be surprised if we met with
difficulty upon difficulty, and could not get on at all. It
is not enough that we seek God's help for that which man-
ifestly is of a spiritual character; but we should seek his
help and blessing by prayer and supplication for all our or-
dinary concerns in life, and if we neglect doing so we shall
surely suffer for the neglect. " Trust in the Lord with all
thine heart ; and lean not unto thine own understanding.
In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy
paths." Prov. iii. 5, 6.
Though these few remarks are written by one who never
was in business himself, yet the truths therein set forth
have been learned by him in the school of God, and he
lias had them abundantly confirmed through his pastoral
labors during the last fifteen years and a half. [This WAS
written in 1845.]
25*
CHAPTER XVII.
REAPING BOUNTIFULLY.
1845 — 1846.
AN UNEXPECTED REQUEST — DELIBERATION — A GREAT UNDERTAKING —
RELIANCE ON THE RESOURCES OF THE LIVING GOD — AN ANSWEB
EXPECTED AND RECEIVED — PRAYER FOR FAITH AND PATIENCE —
FURTHER PROOFS OF DIVINE FAVOR — THE BLESSEDNESS OF DEVISING
LIBERAL THINGS.
I BEGA:N" the service of caring for children who are
bereaved of both parents, by death, born in wedlock, and
are in destitute circumstances, on Dec. 9, 1835. For
nearly ten years I had never had any desire to build an
Orphan House. On the contrary, I decidedly preferred
spending the means which might come in for present
necessities, and desired rather to enlarge the work accord-
ing to the means which the Lord might be pleased to give.
Thus it was till the end of October, 1845, when I was led
to consider this matter in a way in which I had never done
before.1 The occasion of my doing so was this : On Oct.
30, 1845, 1 received from a gentleman, who lived in the
street where the four Orphan Houses were, a polite and
1 The reader will not fail to remark the striking illustration afforded in the
present chapter, of the truth stated in Chapter XVI., that God rewards the
right use of means of benevolence by affording the means of enlarged
V sefulness. — ED.
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. • 295
friendly letter, in which he courteously stated to me that
the inhabitants in the adjoining houses were in various
ways inconvenienced by the Orphan Houses being in Wil-
son Street. He left to myself the judgment of the case.
This letter I received on Thursday morning, Oct. 30,
1845. Being very much occupied that week, I had scarcely
any time to consider the matter. On Monday morning,
however, Nov. 3, I set apart some hours for the prayerful
consideration of the subject, and after I had besought the
Lord to guide me to a right decision, I wrote down the
reasons which appeared to me to make it desirable that
the Orphan Houses should be removed from Wilson Street,
and also the reasons against removing. As far as they are
suitable for being stated hi print they were these : —
I. REASONS FOB REMOVING FROM WILSON STREET.
1. The neighbors feel themselves inconvenienced by the
noise of the children in the play-hours. This complaint is
neither without foundation, nor unjust ; for many persons
are very much inconvenienced by the noise of children,
and those living close by the Orphan Houses must be so
during the play-hours, even though the noise be only of
that kind that one could not at all find fault with the dear
children on account of it. I should myself feel it trying
to my head to live next door to the Orphan Houses on
that account. I therefore ought to do to others as I should
wish to be done by. This point had never before appeared
to me in so serious a light.
2. The greatness of the number of the inmates in the
houses had several times prevented the drains from acting
properly, and thus has a few times affected the water in
one or two of the neighbors' houses. With reference to
these two reasons as it regards those living near the
Orphan Houses, these words, " Let not your good be evil
296 THE LIFE OF TRUST. OHAP. XVII
epoken of," Rom. xiv. 16, and "Let your moderation (i. e.
yieldingness) be known unto all men," Philip, iv. 5, seemed
to me two important portions of the word of God to be
acted out in this matter.
But in addition to the reasons' for removing the Orphan
Houses from Wilson Street on account of the unavoidable
occasional inconvenience that comes upon the neighbors,
there appeared now to me, when once I was led to con-
sider seriously the reasons for removing the Institution
from Wilson Street, other reasons for doing so, in connec-
tion with the work itself, which had occurred to me before,
but never in so strong a light as now, when the subject
was brought more immediately before me by the letter in
which I was politely requested to remove the Orphan
Houses from Wilson Street. These reasons are : —
1. We have no proper play-grounds in Wilson Street.
There is one play-ground, which, however, is only large
enough for the children of one house at a time ; but as
there are children in four houses who ought to have the
benefit of it, we cannot arrange so that all the children
have the full benefit of that play-ground, as the meals,
the school-hours, the weather, and other hindrances inter-
fere. The dear orphans ought, I know, to be trained in
habits of industry, but children are children, and need to
be treated as such ; and they should, on account of their
health, have the full benefit of a play-ground. But this
they cannot have in Wilson Street : an I to take them
out into the fields for the benefit of bodily exercise, as
we have been in the habit of doing, is often very incon-
venient.
2. We have no ground for cultivation near the Orphan
Houses, and hence there must be more walking for the
children, on account of using proper means for keeping
them, with the blessing of God, in health, than is in other
respects good for them; because frequent walks easily
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 297
beget in children habits of idleness, which would be espe-
cially felt when boys are apprenticed. But this difficulty
cannot be obviated by remaining in Wilson Street, and
renting a piece of land somewhere else for cultivation ; for
to get the children ready and conduct them to the piece
of ground not only takes a good deal of time, but is con-
nected with other great inconveniences, yea, with insur-
mountable difficulties, so that we found it needful to give
up a small piece of ground which we once rented for about
two years for the orphan boys, at a distance of about half
a mile from Wilson Street. Thus, by removing from
Wilson Street, and obtaining premises surrounded by land
for cultivation, we should be able to procure a most im-
portant moral benefit for the children, by having the
opportunity more fully than we now have of training them
in habits of industry, besides giving to the boys occupation
which is more suitable for them than knitting, which is
now the only employment they have, besides making their
beds, cleaning the house, and attending to the cooking of
their meals. Moreover, this would be occupation in the
open air, which not only would bring into exercise the use
of their limbs, but also make walking for the sake of health
almost entirely needless.
3. If we were to remove from Wilson Street, and ob
tain premises in the country, we might have all the wash-
ing done at home, which now, for want of room, can be
only done in part. Thus the girls also would have more
laborious work at home, a point of great importance for
them, so that they would not feel so much the hardships
connected with going out to service.
4. The situation of Wilson Street is perhaps scarcely
bracing enough for strengthening the constitution of the
orphans, most of whom, being the offspring of very
diseased parents, require a very invigorating place of
abode.
298 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
5. The present situation is certainly not desirable for
the teachers, especially as, when their hours of work are
over, they have no garden or fields close to the house
immediately to go into for a little refreshment of their
body ; and for some of them it is too far to go to fields,
where they might have a bracing air.
6. In times of sickness we are too confined in the houses
in Wilson Street. If there were less than thirty children
in each house, the average expenses for each child would
be too great, it being desirable, as the arrangements are
now, that there should not be less than three laborers in
each house ; and yet, if there are thirty children in each
house, we are too full in time of sickness, as we have not a
single spare room in any of the houses. Now, though the
Lord has during all these years most mercifully helped us
through such seasons, yet it has not been without incon-
venience, and without also, perhaps, having more of the
children in one room, at such times, than on account of
health it is desirable.
7. Even ordinarily, when there is no sickness, it would
be desirable to have more room.
There are no premises to be had in Bristol, or in the
immediate neighborhood, where we could have these ad-
vantages \for I have been looking about in all directions for
this purpose during the last ten years. But suppose there
were a large house to be had in one part of the city, and a
second a mile off, and a third and a fourth in other direc-
tions, such houses, on account of our peculiar position in
the work, would not do. For in seasons of need the dis-
tance of the several houses would render it very inconven-
ient for the laborers to meet together for prayer, to divide
the means that may be in hand, etc. Besides, when in
seasons of other peculiar difficulties, connected with the
work, I wished to meet all my fellow-laborers, there would
arise great difficulty by their being divided in different
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 299
parts of the city. It would also thus be very inconvenient
to persons who wish to see the work, to go from place to
place, in order to have a view of all the Orphan Houses.
But this is riot all. The more I have considered the mat-
ter, the more am I now persuaded that no ordinary large
houses, built for private families, and therefore only calcu-
lated to accommodate ten or fifteen persons at most for
any length of time in them, will do for charitable institu-
tions of any considerable size, as no ordinary house, except
built on purpose, furnishes the proper advantages of ven-
tilation, a point so needful for the health of the inmates in
a charitable institution. There seemed to me, therefore,
to remain nothing but to build premises for the purpose.
H. REASONS FOB REMAINING IN WILSON STREET.
1. God hitherto has pointed out the spot most plainly.
At the commencement of the work, in 1835, no other
house was to be had but No. 6 Wilson Street. After-
wards, when in 1836 the Infant Orphan House was on the
point of being opened, again I was looking about in all
directions, and saw many houses, but found none that was
suitable, till all at once, most unlocked for, the occupiers
of No. 1 Wilson Street were desirous of immediately
leaving that house, and I was able thus to rent it. When
in 1837 I was on the point of opening the Boys' Orphan
House, I looked about again for a house in all directions ;
for I knew not at that time, what I have since learned by
experience, that it was so important that all the houses
should be near together. After seeking long in vain, I at
last found a very large house, not far from Wilson Street,
which I rented ; but when the occupiers of the houses in
the neighborhood heard that that house had been let for
a charitable institution, they threatened the owner with an
action, which led him to request me to give up the agree-
300 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
meiit, which, of course, I did immediately. At last, most
unexpectedly, after having looked about in vain in all
directions, the occupiers of No. 3 Wilson Street offered
it to me, and I rented it for the orphan boys. Lastly, in
the year 1843, when I was led to see it to be the will of
God to go forward in this work, and to establish the Girls'
Orphan House, No. 2, for older girls, one particular feature
in the matter was, that the house No. 4 in Wilson Street
had been offered to me, without being sought after, when
there had not been for about six years one single largo
house to be let in that street.
[But though hitherto God lias pointed out Wilson Street
as being the spot where this work should be carried on,
may not now the time have come for removing ?]
2. Perhaps we might also rent Nos. 2, 5, and 7, in Wil-
son Street, and use two out of those three houses for Or-
phan Houses, and one of them for an infirmary in the case
of sickness.
[But then, I said to myself, would not the objection,
which the neighbors on the opposite side of the street
might make, on account of the noise of the children in
their play-hours, etc., remain ? Also the drains would be
still more unsuitable, not being constructed for so many
inmates; and to alter them would be a heavy expense.
The play-ground would be still less sufficient, if two new
houses were added. Lastly, there was no reason to think
that we could rent Nos. 2, 5, and 7.]
3. There are these three great objections against build-
ing : The considerable sum which is required, and which
could be spent for present use upon the orphans. The
pilgrim character of the Christian seems lost in building.
The time that it will necessarily take in making arrange-
ments for it.
[Do not all these objections only hold good, I said to
myselfj if I were needlessly to set about building ? If I
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 301
could rent premises, which are really in every way suitable
for the work, and I preferred building, then those objec-
tions would apply to the case ; but when one is forced to
it, it is no more than erecting a large building because
there may be eight hundred children of God in fellowship
who have been hitherto renting a meeting-place, but for
certain reasons are obliged to leave it, and cannot rent
another. Such could not be accused of needlessly spend-
ing money in building instead of renting ; nor could it be
justly said that they have on that account given up the
pilgrim character ; nor would it be time wasted if some
individuals were to make arrangements about the building
of that meeting-place. Therefore these three objections
just mentioned, which had been for ten years strongly in
my own mind, were removed when once I saw plainly that
nothing remained but to build.]
After I had spent a few hours in prayer and considera
tion over the subject, I began already to see that the Lord
would lead me to build, and that his intentions were not
only the benefit of the orphans and the better ordering
of the whole work, but also the bearing still further tes-
timony that he could and would provide large sums for
those who need them and trust in him for them ; and be-
sides, that he would enlarge the work, so that, if I once
did build a house, it might be large enough to accommo-
date three hundred orphans, with their teachers and other
overseers and servants needful for the work. Concerning
this latter point, I think it important to remark, that
during no period had the number of the applications for
the admission of orphans been greater than just before I
was led to think about building, so that it was quite
painful to me not to be able to comply with the wishes of
all the many persons who applied for the admission of
orphans. There were many waiting for admission, par-
ticularly orphan boys.
302 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XV1L
In the afternoon of November 3, 1845, I laid the matter
before my fellow-laborers in the church (eight in number),
to get their judgment, whether I ought not to leave
Wilson Street, and to build. All judged that I ought
to leave Wilson Street, and none saw reasons against
building.
On Nov. 4, my dear wife and I began to meet for prayer
about this matter, and purposed to do so morning by
morning. We asked God for clearer light concerning the
particular points connected with the subject; and being
assured that it was his will that I should build, I began
asking the Lord for means.
On Nov. 7, I judged, having considered the matter more
fully, that sufficiently large premises to furnish all needful
accommodation for three hundred children (from their
earliest days up to fifteen or sixteen years old), together
with a sufficiently large piece of ground in the neghbor-
hood of Bristol, for building the premises upon, and the
remainder for cultivation by the spade, would cost at least
ten thousand pounds. I was not discouraged by this, but
trusted in the living God.
We continued meeting for prayer morning by morning
for fifteen days, but not a single donation came in ; yet my
heart was not discouraged. The more I prayed, the more
assured I was that the Lord would give the means. Yea,
as fully assured was I that the Lord would do so, as if I
had already seen the new premises actually before me.
This assurance arose not from some vague, enthusiastical
feeling, the mere excitement of the moment, but, 1. From
the reasons already related, and especially from the com-
mandment contained in Philip, iv. 5. For I saw that I
should not act according to the mind of our Lord Jesus
if I did not, as soon as I could, remove the orphans from
Wilson Street, as it had been stated to me, in the letter
above referred to, that their living there was an annoyance
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 303
to some of the inhabitants in that street. 2. This assur-
ance that I should build an Orphan House arose further
from the whole way in which the Lord had been pleased
to lead me in connection with the Scriptural Knowledge
Institution for Home and Abroad since its beginning on
March 5, 1834, i. e. he has been leading me forward as by
an unseen hand, and enlarging the work more and more
from its commencement, and, generally, without my seek-
ing after it, and bringing things so clearly before me that I
could not but see that I ought to go forward. 3. Lastly
and chiefly, this, my assurance that I should build unto
the Lord this house of mercy, arose also particularly from
this, that having strictly examined my heart as to the
motives for doing so, I found that, as before God, I could
say that my only motives were his honor and glory, and
the welfare of the church of Christ at large, the real tem-
poral and spiritual welfare of destitute orphans, and the
welfare of all those who might take care of them, in the
building to be erected. And finding that, after praying
again and again about the matter, I still remained in per-
fect peace, I judged it assuredly to be the will of God that
I should go forward.
On Nov. 15, brother H. C. arrived, to labor for a little
while in Bristol. I communicated to him my position
with reference to having to remove the orphans from Wil-
son Street, and I had his judgment also as to its being of
God that I should build. This dear brother's judgment
greatly encouraged me. His visit was to me of great help
in this particular, especially in stirring me up yet more to
bring everything in connection with this matter before
God. He also laid it on my heart to seek direction from
God with reference to the plan of the building. He said,
M You must ask help from. God to show you the plan, so
that all may be according to the mind of God."
Up to Dec. 9, thirty-five days had passed away, whilst I
304 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
was day by clay waiting upon God for means for this work,
and not a single penny had been given to me. Neverthe-
less, this did not in the least discourage me, but my assur-
ance that God, in his own time and in his own way, would
give the means, increased more and more. The portion
which came in course of my meditation on the New Testa-
ment, was the beginning of the epistle of James. More
than at any period in my life was I struck with these verses :
"My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temp-
tations (i. e. trials) ; knowing this, that the trying of your
faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect
work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing."
James i. 2-4. It was especially the last verse, " But let
patience have her perfect work," etc., which I found of
exceeding great importance with reference to the building
of the Orphan House. It led out my soul in prayer day
after day, to ask the Lord to increase my faith, and to sus-
tain my patience. I had these verses so impressed upon
my heart that I could not but think that God meant par-
ticularly to bless me by them, with regard to the work
before me, and that I should especially need patience as
well as faith.
On the thirty-sixth day after having begun to pray, Dec.
10, 1845, I received one thousand pounds, towards the
building of the Orphan House. This is the largest dona-
tion that I had received up to that time for the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution ; but when I received it I was aa
calm, as quiet, as if I had only received one shilling. For
my heart was looking out for answers. Day by day I was
expecting to receive answers to my prayers. Therefore,
having faith concerning the matter, this donation did not
in the least surprise me. Yea, if five thousand pounds or
ten thousand pounds had been given to me, instead of one
thousand pounds, it would not have surprised me.
Dec . 13. On the thirty-ninth day my sister-in-law, who
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 305
had been for some weeks absent in London, and who had
now returned to Bristol, told me that she had met a gen-
tleman in London, who, having quite recently read with
deep interest the Narrative of the Lord's dealings with me,
wished to know as many particulars about the work in my
hands as he could. Being told by my sister-in-law that I
purposed to build an Orphan House, he, an architect,
offered to make the plan, and superintend the building
gratuitously. Unsolicited, he pressed this matter upon
her with deep and lively interest. I hear also that he is a
Christian. The fact that this offer comes unsolicited, and
from a Christian architect, shows especially the hand of
God. This is the second proof that God will help me in
this matter.
Dec. 23. This is now the fiftieth day since I have come
to the conclusion ,to build, and the forty-ninth day since
we have been daily waiting upon God for help. Nothing
more has come in since Dec. 10, not even one penny. This
morning I have been particularly encouraged by the con-
sideration that the Lord has sent me the one thousand
pounds, and the promise from that pious architect, whom I
have never seen, and of whose name I am as yet in igno-
rance, not to mock me, but as an earnest that he will give
all that is needed.
It seems desirable that we should have a large piece of
ground, at least six or seven acres. This piece of ground
must be in the vicinity of Bristol : 1. In order that the
Orphan House may be accessible to me, as my place at
present is fixed by my other work in Bristol. 2. That the
laborers in the Institution, and the orphans may be able to
attend our meetings, at least on the Lord's day. For if
meetings were held on purpose in the Orphan House,
either the laborers or the children would not be benefited
\)y them in that measure in which it is desirable. 3. That
the inhabitants of Bristol may have the benefit of seeing
26*
306 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVII
with their own eyes this work of God, which is so mani-
festly his and not mine. 4. That strangers who pass
through Bristol may have easy access to it, for the same
reason. But then, such a piece of ground near Bristol,
where there is just now such an inordinate desire for
building, in the way of speculation, would cost, in all
human probability, between two and three thousand
pounds. Then the building itself, however plain, would
not cost less than from six to eight thousand pounds,
being for three hundred orphans, besides all their over-
seers, teachers, and assistants. In addition to this, the
fitting up and furnishing the house for all these be-
tween three and four hundred inmates would not cost
less than fifteen hundred pounds more. This is indeed
a large sum of money which I need ; but my hope is
in God. I have not sought after this thing. It has not
begun with me. God has altogether unexpectedly, by
means of the letter before mentioned, led me to it. Only
the day before I received the letter, I had no more
thought about building premises for the accommodation
of the orphans than I had had during the ten previous
years. My especial prayer is that God would continue to
me faith and patience. If he shall be pleased to help me
in faith and patience to continue to wait on him, help will
surely come.
Dec. 24. No further donation yet. But my hope in
God is unshaken. He most assuredly will help. I have
on purpose not issued any circular in connection with this
matter, in order that the hand of God may be the more
manifest. To some persons residing in or out of Bristol
I have spoken about my intention of building, when con-
versation led to it. Through this, if the Lord please, he
can make it known to others, and thus send means for the
buiding fund. Or he can send in such an abundance of
means for the work which is already in existence, that
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 307
from that abundance there might be a rich surplus towards
the building fund. But howsoever God may help, I do
desire to see his hand made most manifest. There will be,
no doubt, many trials connected with this enlargement of
the field of labor (for if with the one hundred and thirty
orphans there has been so much trial of faith, what is to be
expected when the number is three hundred) ; and there-
fore I desire to see as clearly as daylight that God himself
is leading me onward.
Dec. 29. This is the fifty-sixth day since I came to the
conclusion to build, and the fifty-fifth since I have been
day by day waiting upon God concerning it. Only that
one donation had come in till this evening, when I received
fifty pounds. This donation is exceedingly precious to
me, not only because I am sure it is most cheerfully given,
nor even because of its largeness, but because it is another
precious proof that God will bring about the matter, else
he would not give me these earnests. All my business
therefore is, to continue in faith and patience to wait
upon God. My assurance has been more and more in-
creasing that God will build for himself a large Orphan
House in this city, to show to the inhabitants, and to all
who may read and hear about it, what a blessed thing it is
to trust in him. Of late I have s'een, by God's grace,
more and more how entirely unworthy I am of being
used by God for this glorious and honorable service, and
I can only say : " Lord, here is thy servant, if thou ait
pleased to use such a one as I am."
Dec. 30, 1845. This morning I came, in course of my
reading, to the commencement of the book of Ezra. I
was particularly refreshed by the two following points
contained in the first chapter, in applying them to the
building of the Orphan House: 1. Cyrus, an idolatrous
king, was used by God to provide the means for building
the temple at Jerusalem : how easy therefore for God to
SOfc. THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
provide ten thousand pounds for the Orphan House, or
even twenty or thirty thousand pounds, if needed. 2. The
people were stirred up by God to help those who went
up to Jerusalem. Thus it is a small matter for him to put
it into the hearts of his children to help me, in desiring
to build this house of mercy unto his name. This medita-
tion I had before breakfast. After family prayer in the
morning, I had again my usual season for prayer about the
building, and at this time it was particularly coupled with
thanksgiving for the fifty pounds received last evening, and
with entreating blessings on the donor. I was now look-
ing out for more, as I am doing day by day, when this
afternoon I received from a person at Clevedon two shil-
lings sixpence, from her grandson sixpence, and from the
Bister in the Lord who brought the money the change
which she did not wish back, being another sixpence.
These donations, though small, are nevertheless very
precious to me, as I take them as further proofs out of the
hands of God that he will most assuredly bring this thing
to pass. This evening I received one thousand pounds
towards the building fund. When I received this dona-
tion I was as calm, yea as perfectly calm, as if I had
received a single penny, because, by God's grace, I have
faith in him, and therefore I am looking for answers to my
prayers, and am sure that God will give every shilling that
is needed.
January 2, 1846. This evening I received from Bideford
eleven shillings towards the building fund.
Jan. 3. One of the orphans gave sixpence.
Jan. 6. Received a little bag made of foreign seed,
and a shell flower, to be sold for the building fund. The
sister who sent these articles wrote to me, that the moment
she heard of my intention of building an Orphan House,
this text was before her mind : " Who art thou, O great
1846. HEAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 309
mountain ? Before Zerubbabel thou shalt become a plain."
Zech. iv. 7. Also one of the orphans sent fourpence.
Having asked the Lord to go before me, I went out to-
day to look for a piece of ground. The armory which is
to be sold had been several times mentioned to me as a
suitable place. I did not think so, yet I thought I ought
at least to look at it. Having seen it and been confirmed
in my judgment about its unsuitableness, I asked the Lord
whether I should turn towards the city or towards Staple-
ton. I felt led to go towards the city, and saw immediately
after some fields near the armory. After having made in-
quiry to whom they belonged, I have been led to write
this evening to the owner of them, asking him whether he
is disposed to sell them, etc. I am now quietly waiting
the Lord's pleasure. If his time is come to answer our
requests as to a suitable piece of land, I shall be glad ; if
it is not yet come, I desire that " patience may have her
perfect work, being perfect and entire, wanting nothing."
Jan. 8. This evening I received a reply to my letter.
The owner of those fields writes, that, if he did sell
them, it would be only for building land, and therefore
they will be too dear.
Jan. 9. Went this morning once more to see those fields,
which seem very suitable. Met there Mr. L., a land agent,
who told me that they would be nearly a thousand
pounds per acre, and therefore too dear. I asked Mr.
L. to inform me if he should hear of any suitable land for
sale.
Jan. 31. It is now eighty-nine days since I have been
daily waiting upon God about the building of an Orphan
House. The time seems to me now near when the Lord
will give us a piece of ground, and I told the brethren and
Bisters so this evening, after our usual Saturday evening
prayer meeting at the Orphan House.
Feb. 1. A poor widow sent to-day ten shillings.
310 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
Feb. 2, To-day I heard of suitable and cheap land on
Ashley Down.
Feb. 3. Saw the land. It is the most desirable of all I
have seen. There was anonymously put into an orphan
box at my house a sovereign, in a piece of paper, on which
was written, " The New Orphan House."
Feb. 4. This evening I called on the owner of the land
on Ashley Down, about which I had heard on the 2d,
but he was not at home. As I, however, had been in-
formed that I should find him at his house of business, I
went there, but did not find him there either, as he had
just before left. I might have called again at his residence
at a later hour, having been informed by one of the ser-
vants that he would be sure to be at home about eight
o'clock ; but I did not do so, judging that there was the
hand of God in my not finding him at either place : and
I judged it best therefore not to force the matter, but to
" let patience have her perfect work."
Feb. 5. Saw this morning the ow^ner of the land. He
told me that he awoke at three o'clock this morning and
could not sleep again till five. While he was thus lying
awake his mind was all the time occupied about the piece
of land respecting which inquiry had been made of him
for the building of an Orphan House, at my request ; and
he determined with himself that, if I should apply for it,
he would not only let me have it, but for one hundred and
twenty pounds per acre, instead of two hundred pounds,
the price which he had previously asked for it. How good
is the Lord ! The agreement was made this morning, and
I purchased a field of nearly seven acres, at one hundred
and twenty pounds per acre.
Observe the hand of God in my not finding the owner
at home last evening ! The Lord meant to speak to his
servant first about this matter, during a sleepless night, and
to xead him fully to decide before I had seen him.
1846. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 311
Feb. 8. I wrote the day before yesterday to the archi-
tect, who has offered his help gratuitously.
Feb. 11. Received from a sister in the Lord five pounds.
Received also from the architect the following reply to my
letter : —
MY DEAR SIR:
It will afford me a gratification, beyond what I can commu-
nicate by letter, to lend you the helping hand in the labor of love
you are engaged in, and I shall esteem it a very great privilege
being allowed to exercise my abilities as an architect and surveyor
in the erection of the building you propose to erect for the orphans.
[ really do mean what I say, and, if all is well, by the blessing of
God, I will gratuitously furnish you with plans, elevations, and sec-
tions, with specification of the work, so that the cost may be accu-
rately estimated. I will also make you an estimate and superintend
the works for you gratuitously, etc.
The total amount which has been given for the
building fund, up to June 4, 1846, is' two thousand seven
hundred and ten pounds three shillings five and a. half
pence. This is only a small part of what will be needed ;
but, by the grace of God, I am in perfect peace, being fully
assured that God in his own time will send the whole sum
which is required. Many and great have already been the
exercises of faith and patience since I first began to give
myself to prayer about this work, and still greater they
may be, before it is accomplished ; but God, in the riches
of his grace, will help me though them all. It is now
(June 4, 1846) two hundred and twelve days since I first
began to pray about this work, and day after day, since
then, have I been enabled to continue to wait upon God,
and I am more than ever assured that, notwithstanding all
my exceeding great un worthiness, God will condescend to
use me, to build this house. Had it been the excitement
of the moment, the difficulties which have already come
312 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
upon me in connection with this work (and which are not
stated here, on account of their occupying too much room)
would have overwhelmed me ; but as God himself, I trust,
led me to this work, so he has helped me, and does help
me, and I doubt not will help me to the end.
The house is intended to be built so as to accommodate
one hundred and forty orphan girls above seven years of
age, eighty orphan boys above seven, and eighty male and
female orphans from their earliest days, till they are seven
years old, together with all the overseers and teachers, etc.,
that may be needed. The infants, after having passed the
age of seven, will be removed into the different depart-
ments for older boys and girls.
Before leaving this period, it may be proper to recur to
the following miscellaneous points, respecting the Scriptu-
ral Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad, with re-
ference to the period from July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846.
1. During the whole of this period four day schools, with
278 children in them, were entirely supported by the funds
of the Institution. Three day schools besides were as
sisted. The number of the children that were taught in
the day schools, entirely supported by the funds of the In-
stitution, from March 5, 1834, to May 26, 1846, amounts
to 3,983. During the period from July 14, 1844, to May
26, 1846, £628, 19s. 4:ld. was spent on all the schools,
which were either entirely or in part supported by the
funds of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution. Further :
during this period there were also entirely supported a
Sunday school with 80 children, and an adult school with
60 persons attending it. The total number of the adult
scholars who received instruction, from the formation of
this Institution to May 26, 1846, is 1,146.
2. During this period were circulated 269 Bibles and
171 Testaments ; and 5,079 Bibles and 3,528 Testaments
were circulated from the commencement of the work up
1846. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 313
to May 26, 1846. From July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846,
£405 7s. lOd. was expended of the funds of the Institution
on this object.
3. From July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846, was laid out
for foreign and home missions the sum of £595, 7s. 9d.
During no period previously was so much of the funds
of this Institution spent on missionary work, which arose
from the fact that the more I corresponded with breth-
ren who labored in the word and doctrine in foreign
lands, the more I saw how much they stood in need of as-
sistance, and thus, my heart having been led out in prayer
to God on their behalf, that he would be pleased to send
me means, whereby I might be able to assist them, he was
pleased to do so. This led me to the purpose, as God
should give me grace, to be still more mindful of them in
future, and to seek to be able still more to assist them.
The same was the case with regard to those brethren who
labor in England, but who have no salary or stipend,
but trust in the living God for the supply of their daily
necessities ; I did long to help such brethren, and had no
doubt that God would enable me to do so.
4. There was laid out for the circulation of tracts from
July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846, the sum of £56, 6s. 9|d.,
for which 52,003 such little publications were bought,
which, with 5,315 in hand on July 14, 1844, makes 57,318,
of which number 40,565 were circulated. The total num-
ber circulated from Nov. 19, 1840, to May 26, 1846, amounts
to 99,647.
5. There were received into the four Orphan Houses,
from July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846, 30 orphans, who, to-
gether with those who were in the four houses on July 14,
1844, make up 151 in all.
On May 26, 1846, there were 121 orphans in the four
houses. Besides this, six apprentices were still supported
by the funds of the Institution, so that the total number
27
314 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVII.
was 127. The number of the orphans who were under
our care from April, 1836, to May 26, 1846, amounts to 213.
I notice further the following points in connection with
the Orphan Houses.
1. Without any one having been personally applied to
for anything by me, the sum of £13,275, 6s. 9|d. was
given to me as the result of prayer to God, from the com-
mencement of the work up to May 26, 1846. This sum
Deludes the £2,710, 3s. 5Jd. which, up ^to June 4, 1846, was
given towards the building fund. (It may be interesting
to the reader to know that the total amount which was
given as free contributions, for the other objects, from the
commencement of the work up to May 26, 1846, amounts
to £4,833, 18s. 10 jd. ; and that which came in by the sale
of Bibles and tracts, and by the payments of the children
in the day schools, amounts to £2,097, 18s. 2-^-d.) 2. Be-
sides this, also a great variety and number of articles of
clothing, furniture, provisions, etc., were given for the
orphans, as has been stated in the printed Reports. The
total expenditure for the orphans from July 14, 1844, to
May 26, 1846, was £2,732, 14s. lid., and for the other
objects, £1,325, 7s. 7Jd.
In conclusion, I cannot but mention to the praise of the
Lord concerning this period, that four of the Sunday-
school children were admitted to communion. Likewise
three more of the orphans were received into church
fellowship ; so that up to that time, altogether, thirty-two
of the orphans had been admitted. I also mention with
peculiar joy, and as a matter for thankfulness, that of
those who were apprenticed or sent out to service, from
July 14, 1844, to May 26, 1846, ten were believers, most of
whom had been for several years in fellowship before they
were sent out to service. But whilst we desire to receive
these instances as precious encouragements from the Lord
to continue our service, we cannot but believe, judging
1844. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 315
from the many prayers the Lord gives us for the children
and adults under o.ur care and instruction, that that which
we see is but an earnest of a far larger harvest in the day
of Christ's appearing.
Dec. 31, 1844. Since brother Craik and I came to
Bristol, 982 believers have been received into communion.
During this year 73 have been received.
The Lord has been pleased to give me during this year
£267, 6s. 9d. To this is to be added that for the first two
months and six days of this year, my expenses, and those
of my dear wife, during our stay in Germany, were met, as
also our travelling expenses back, as stated in another
part of my Narrative. Also during the whole of this year
a Christian lady gave to our dear child board and schooling
without any remuneration, a present worth to us not less
than fifty pounds. On this point I cannot help making a
few remarks : I had clearly seen it to be the will of God
that my daughter should be brought up at school, and not
at home. My reasons for it were these : 1. My dear wife,
though well qualified to instruct our daughter, so far as
knowledge goes, was unable, on account of being engaged
as my wife in a variety of things connected with the
Lord's service, to give herself uninterruptedly to this work ;
and to do it partially we judged to be injurious to our
daughter. 2. I had seen instances in which a home edu-
cation for an only child had turned out very badly. 3. I
judged that the mixing with other children would be bene-
ficial to our daughter, provided that intercourse was under
proper oversight ; as thus a child is in early life introduced
into a little world, and things do not all at once come upon
a young person, when at last obliged to leave the parental
roof. 4. But that which most of all led me to this decis-
ion was, that as in the church of Christ the Lord has quali-
fied the members of the body for the performance of
certain work, and all have not the same gift and service, so,
316 THE LIFE OF TEUST. CJIAP. XVII
in the same way, certain believers are called and qualified
above others for instructing children, and give themselves
to this particular service, and that, therefore, I ought to
make use of the qualifications of such, and of their having
given their whole time to this particular service. These
reasons led us to place our daughter at school, instead of
educating her at home, and we have never had cause to
regret the step we took, but, on the contrary, have had
abundant reason to praise God for it. I have purposely
made these remarks, as I am fully aware that some believ-
ers have different views on this subject, and I desire to
serve them with the measure of light and experience I
have obtained.
After our daughter had been at school for half a year,
I asked for the account, when it was stated to me by the
Christian lady in whose establishment she was that she
had a pleasure in educating her gratuitously. However,
as I pressed the matter, I obtained the account. It was
paid, but the exact sum was returned to me anonymously,
which, of course, I found out at once to be from the Chris-
tian sister at whose school my daughter was. From that
time I could never more obtain the account, though my
dear child was about six years longer at school. I refer to
this point for this especial reason : God had laid it on my
heart to care about poor destitute orphans. To this ser-
vice I had been led to give myself; he, in return, as a
recompense, even for this life, took care that my own be-
loved child should have a very good education, free of
expense to me. I was able and well able to pay for her
education, and most willing to do so ; but the Lord gave
it gratuitously ; thus also showing how ready he is abun-
dantly to help me, and to supply my wants.
Having learned that the brethren in Germany were
led away by false teachers, and having received, in
1845. REAPING BOUNTIFULLY. 317
answer to prayer, five hundred pounds, for the expeLses
of his journey thither, Mr. M. left Bristol July 19,
1815, and, after laboring in word and doctrine in Ger-
many, he returned to Bristol Oct. 11, 1845.
Perhaps the reader may ask, What has been the result
of this labor in Germany ? My reply is, God only knows.
The day of Christ will declare it. Judging from the con-
stant labor in prayer during eight months before I went
the second time, and day by day while I was on the Con-
tinent, and day by day for a long time after my return, I
am warranted to expect fruit, and I do expect it. I ex-
pect abundant fruit in the day of Christ's appearing. In
the mean time my comfort is that two hundred and twenty
thousand tracts have been circulated, many of which,
through the providence of God, found their way not only
into the darkest places of the continent of Europe, but
went also to America and Australia. Further : four thou-
sand copies of my Narrative, in German, are almost all cir-
culated. And, again, the publishing of my Narrative in
German led rue to do the same in French, which was accom-
plished about three years later. Further: these tracts were
reprinted at Hamburg and at Cologne, and are circulated
by other Christians ; in addition to which, my having pub-
lished them in Germany led me to get them stereotyped
in England, and they continue to be circulated in many
countries.
December 31, 1845. There have been received into
communion 53 during this year, and 1,055 since the com-
mencement of our coming to Bristol.
During this year the Lord has been pleased to give to me
£433, 19s. l|d. To this is to be added that my dear child
had again during the whole of this year her education free
at a boarding-school, as stated at the close of the last year,
27*
318 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVII
whereby I saved about fifty pounds. Also my travelling
expenses to and from Germany, and other expenses con-
nected with my service in Germany, were paid out of the
£500 pounds to which reference has been made. Adding
these two items to £433, 1 had at least £500.
April 29, 1846. To-day my beloved wife and myself
had the inexpressibly great joy of receiving a letter from
our beloved daughter, while we are staying in the Lord's
service at Chippenham, in which she wiites that she has
now found peace in the Lord Jesus. Thus our prayers are
turned into praises. About eighteen months before this I
began especially to pray for the conversion of my dear
child, and the Lord soon after seems to have begun to
work in her heart.
CHAPTER XVIII.
FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY.
1846 — 1848.
THE SPIRIT OF SUPPLICATION BESTOWED A.ND PRAYER ANSWERED— THH
TIME OF MATE'S NEED AND OB1 GOD'S BOUNTY — FAITH NOT SHAKEN —
DEALING ONLY WITH GOD — THE NEEDED AMOUNT FURNISHED — PER-
PETUAL "NEED" — NOT WEARY IN GOD'S WORK— JOY IN ANSWERED
PRAYER — FOUR REQUESTS GRANTED — " CONTINUING INSTANT IN
PRAYER''— THE BUILDING COMMENCED — PERSONAL HISTORY — A MARKED
DELIVERANCE.
IN the following chapter, Mr. Miiller has grouped
together, under the appropriate heads, the leading
events connected with each of the departments of the
work of the Lord in his hands.
I. ASSISTANCE TO THE MISSIONARY LABORERS.
During no former period since undertaking to send aid
to laborers at home and abroad was I intrusted by the
Lord with such large sums as during the one to which this
chapter refers. I had never had more need of pecuniary
supplies than during those two years, on account of the
many pressing calls ; but, at the same time, I had the ex-
ceeding great joy and privilege of being able to respond
to them in such a way as I had never before been allowed
320 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIIL
to do. These remarks apply to all the various objects of
the Institution, but especially to the supplies for brethren
who labor at home and abroad in word and doctrine, with-
out being connected with any society, or without having
any regular salary for preaching the word.
On May 26, 1846, after the accounts had been closed,
a check for one hundred pounds was given to me, the ap-
plication of which was left to my disposal. I put half of
the amount to the fund for these objects, and half to the
orphan fund. When the accounts were closed, there was
ninety-one pounds four shillings elevenpence three far-
things in hand for these objects, to which this fifty pounds
was added ; therefore I began this period with more means
than I had had in hand at any time previously at the be-
ginning of a fresh period ; and as was its beginning, so was
the continuance. It has often struck me that one especial
reason why, on the whole, I was allowed to have so little
trial with regard to means for the work during those two
years, in comparison with former times, may have been,
that thereby the Lord would say that he was willing to
give what would be needed, when once the new Orphan
House should be built, though the expenses would be
about two thousand five hundred pounds a year more than
they were before.
June 4, 1846. To-day was given to me, just wJien I rose
from my knees, after having asked the Lord for more
means, especially for missionary purposes, the sum of one
hundred and fifty pounds, with the request to use of it
fifty pounds jfor the orphans, fifty pounds for laborers in
England, and fifty pounds for laborers abroad.
From the commencement of this Institution, on March
5, 1834, it had been my desire to employ part of the funds,
with which I might be intrusted, in aiding missionary
brethren in foreign lands, who are not supported by any
regular salary ; and for several years I had likewise had
1846. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 321
the desire to assist brethren, laboring in similar circum-
stances, in Great Britain and Ireland. The Lord also had
given me the great privilege to assist such brethren more
or less during the time that this Institution had been in
operation ; but especially he began during the two years
to which this chapter refers to allow me to do so in a far
greater degree than "beiore. I knew it to be a fact that
many brethren who preach the word, without having any
salary for doing so, or property to live upon, were in need
Now it might be said that such brethren ought to trust in
God ; that, if they preach Jesus as the only hope for the
salvation of sinners, they ought to set them a good ex-
ample by trusting themselves in God for the supply of their
temporal necessities, in order that unconverted persons
thereby might be led to trust in the Lord Jesus alone for
the salvation of their soius. This is true, quite true.
Preachers of the precious good news of salvation to every
sinner who puts his trust in the merits of the Lord Jesus,
ought indeed themselves to depend upon God, their Lord
and Father, for the supply of their temporal necessities ;
but I also felt that I, as their brother, ought to seek to
help them as far as lay in me. To this I set myself more
than ever after the beginning of the year 1846, as I knew,
that, from particular causes, there was an especial call to
help such brethren ; and as my own means would go but
a little way, I gave myself to more earnest prayer than
ever for such brethren. The result was, that, during the
two years of this period, the Lord so answered my daily
supplications with regard to this particular, that I was
honored to send nearly three times as much to home and
foreign laborers as during any previous period of the
same length. One thousand five hundred and fifty-nine
pounds eleven shillings sixpence was spent in this way, by
which twenty-one brethren were assisted who labored in
foreign lands, and nineteen who labored in Great Britain
322 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP.XVIIL
and Ireland. Large as this sum is, in comparison with
what I had been able to do in this particular in former
years, yet it is small, very small, in comparison with
what my heart -desired to be able to do for these forty
brethren. It has frequently, yea almost always, so hap-
pened, that the assistance which God has allowed me to
eend to such brethren has come to them at a time of great
need. Sometimes they had no money at all left. Some-
times even their last provisions were almost consumed,
when I sent them supplies. Some of them are fathers of
targe families, or have sickly wives and children ; some
were once well off in this world, but for Christ's sake have
become poor ; and some have had for Christ's sake their
all taken from them. Is it not an honor to help such
brethren ? I could fill hundreds of pages by giving ex-
tracts from the letters of the dear brethren to whom I
have sent help, and they would be greatly to the edifica-
tion of the reader; but I do not feel free to do so. As I
have not only been laboring for these brethren in prayer
that God would intrust me with means and allow me the
privilege of helping them, but as I also have asked God to
direct me especially to send to those who might be in par-
ticular need, in case I could not help them all; and as I
have sought by an encouraging word to strengthen their
hands in God ; I have great reason to believe that these
dear brethren have not only been helped by these pecu-
niary supplies in a temporal point of view, but also that
the fact of God sending them help in their extremity has
tended to refresh and strengthen their hearts, and to lead
them more and more to trust in him.
March 7, 1847. Often of late had I entreated the Lord
that he would be pleased to condescend to use me still
further as a steward, in allowing me to send help to the
many clear brethren whom I know laboring at home and
abroad without any salary, the need of many of whom I
1847. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 323
knew. Under these circumstances I received this morning
one hundred and fifty pounds, with the following lines :— •
DEAR BROTHER:
I have great pleasure in sending you one hundred pounds on
account of laborers in the Lord's vineyard at home and abroad, and
fifty pounds for other work in your hands.
Yours very affectionately,
* * *
April 5. I have been praying day by day, ever since I
was able during the last month to send about one hundred
and thirty pounds to home and foreign laborers, that the
Lord would be pleased soon again to give me means for
them, on account of their great need ; indeed, all our
means were so exhausted, that I had only just enough for
to-morrow evening to meet the weekly expenses connected
with the six day schools, when this morning I received
one hundred and twenty-five pounds for these objects.
Almost immediately after this donation had been given to
me, I received a letter from Demerara about the great
need among the brethren who labor there, by which intel-
ligence the seasonable fcelp just received has become still
more precious to me.
May 26, 1848. By the Lord's faithful love I have been
enabled to meet all the heavy expenses connected with
these objects during the last two years, amounting to
nearly two thousand and six hundred pounds, and at the
same time owe no one anything, and have a balance of
five pounds nineteen shillings seven pence halfpenny left
in hand.
II. THE SUPPORT OF THE ORPHANS.
Jan. 20, 1847. For the whole of this period since May
26, 1846, therefore nearly eight months, when the accounts
Were closed, we have had always an abundance of means,
324 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVIII.
and for the greater part of the time about two hundred
pounds in hand. The sum of one thousand sixty-five
pounds has come in for the orphans in less than eight
months, to which is to be added the balance of eighty-five
pounds four shillings ninepence three farthings in hand
when the accounts were closed. Invariably I have thus
been able to give to the matrons of the four Orphan
Houses the money in advance, which was required for the
necessities of one week. But now, after having paid away
last evening forty-five pounds five shillings for the house-
keeping of a week in advance and for other expenses, the
money which remains in hand is needed for rent, and oat-
meal, which has been ordered from Scotland. This morn-
ing therefore I gave myself particularly to prayer with
regard to means for present use for the orphans. How
blessed to have the living God to go to ! Particularly
precious to know him in these days of wide-spread dis-
tress ! Potatoes are too dear for food for the orphans at
this time. The rice, which we have substituted instead of
them, is twice as dear as usual ; the oatmeal more than
twice as dear, and the bread one half dearer than usual.
But the riches of God are as great as ever. He knows that
our expenses are great. He knows that a little will not do
in these days, when provisions are so dear, as there are
about one hundred and fifty persons to be provided for,
including teachers and apprentices. My soul is at peace. —
Evening. About noon I received from a pious physician
the following note, with a check for five pounds : —
MY DEAR SIR :
I send you something towards buying bread for the orphans. The
dearness of food must be felt by many; but the Lord in judgment
is nevertheless gracious. He will sustain. I am your sincere friend
and well-wisher,
» « * *
1847. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 325
March 9. This evening, Tuesday, I find that since last
Tuesday evening again forty-four pounds one shilling six-
pence three farthings has come in. How good is the Lord
in helping me week after week through the heavy ex-
penses, especially in this season of deep distress and dear-
ness of provisions ! To his praise I can say we have
lacked nothing all this winter. Whilst preparing these
extracts from my journal for the press, I remember to have
heard the following remarks made with reference to the
time about which I am just now writing, I mean the season
of dearth during the winter of 1846-7 : " I wonder how it
is now with the orphans ? If Mr. Miiller is now able to
provide for them as he has, we will say nothing." When
I heard such like remarks I said nothing except this : "We
lack nothing ;" or, "God helps us." Should this fall into
the hands of any who have had such thoughts, let them
remember that it is the very time for faith to work, when
sight ceases. The greater the difficulties, the easier for
faith. As long as there remain certain natural prospects,
faith does not get on even as easily (if I may say so) as
when all natural prospects fail. It is true that during the
time of the dearth our expenses were considerably greater
than usual ; it is also true that many persons, who other-
wise might have given, were unable to do so, or had their
surplus directed into other channels, such as Ireland, etc. ;
but the gold and silver are the Lord's. To him we made
our prayer. In him we put our trust. And he did not
forsake us. For we went as easily through that winter as
through any winter since the work had been in existence.
Nor could it be otherwise ; for God had at this very time
an especial opportunity of showing the blessedness of
trusting in him. Seek, dear reader, more and more to put
your trust in him for everything, and you will even con-
cerning this life find it most precious so to do.
March 10. I was able, last evening, to meet most com-
as
326 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIII
fortably all the expenses for the coming week, yet we had
then nothing left, as I put by the rest of the money, that
we might not get into debt with regard to the rent, the
expenses of the apprentices, etc. When now there was
again nothing left for future housekeeping expenses, a
Christian lady at a considerable distance informed me by
this morning's post that she has paid into the hands of
Messrs. Stuckey & Co. of Bristol, my bankers, the sum of
one hundred pounds for my use for the benefit of the
orphans. By the same post I have received also ten shil-
lings from Droitwich. The Lord's holy name be praised
for this seasonable help !
May 11. This evening I have been able to meet all the
expenses connected with housekeeping during the coming
week, through what has come in since May 4, but at the
same time I have nothing left. Hitherto thp children have
lacked nothing. Never were provisions nearly so " dear
since the commencement of the work as they are now.
The bread is almost twice as much as eighteen months ago,
the oatmeal nearly three times as much as formerly, the
rice more than double the usual price, and no potatoes can
be used on account of the exceeding high price.
May 30. Lord's-day morning. I have just now received,
in our great need, when there was not sufficient in hand to
meet the necessities of to-morrow, six pounds six shillings,
from a Christian gentleman of title at Zurich in Switzer-
land, a distance of about one thousand miles. What a
most seasonable help ! Thus I am able to send all the
remainder of the supplies which are needed till Tuesday
evening.
In these days of straitness the question would nat-
urally arise, If, when you have only to care for one
hundred and thirty orphans, you are so poor, what will
you do when there are three hundred, for whom you
are just on the point of building a house? And,
1847. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 3lJ7
further, Is it not an indication not to increase the
fork, seeing you are now so poor with only about one
third of the number of orphans which you purpose to
receive into the new Orphan House ? I am not tried,
however, with such thoughts ; for I know that, 1. Only
for the trial of my faith, as heretofore, the Lord allows me
now again to be poor. Never at any time have the
expenses been so great for the work as from May 26, 1846,
to May 26, 1847 ; but also never has so much come in in
the same space of time during any other period of this
work. 2. It is for the profit of the church at large that I
have now again to pass through these days of poverty.
3. It is as easy for the Lord to supply me with all the
means that the work will require when once the new
Orphan House is opened, as it is for him to give me what
I need now, though the expenses in all likelihood will then
be two thousand five hundred pounds a year more than
they are at present.
July 13. The proceeds of an orphan box from Stafford,
four pounds seven shillings sixpence. The friend who sent
the money wished to know whether it arrived in a time of
need. I have had many similar requests, to which I can
reply nothing, or say at the most that the answer may be
learnt from the next Report. It will be easily perceived,
on reflection, that if I said it came seasonably, that would
imply we had little or nothing at all in hand, and what
would that again mean but this, "As our expenses are so
great, that which you have now sent will be soon gone
again, and therefore send us some more, or get some friend
to help us." But by this very thing the chief object of
this work, " To show how blessed it is to deal with God
alone, and how blessed to trust in him in the darkest
moments? would be hindered. It is also for this very
reason that I do not publish the accounts very frequently,
for instance quarterly, as I have been requested to do ; bat
328 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIII
I am delighted to wait a year, or eighteen months, or two
years, or more ; and even then I do not publish them for
the sake of obtaining money (though unquestionably God
has used the Reports as instruments to procure us means),
but for the benefit of the church of God, to refresh,
encourage, exhort, and instruct my brethren in Christ ;
and also because it "is needful that from time to time I
should give a public account of the way in which the
considerable sums with which I have been intrusted
have been spent.
Oct. 19. I left Bristol with my dear wife, partly because
both of us much needed change of air, and partly because
I had a great desire to labor in the word for a few weeks
in Westmoreland and Cumberland. I was not able to
leave more means than enough for about three days for
house-keeping expenses. But I could not have stayed in
Bristol, though there had been nothing at all in hand ; my
hope was that God would help during my absence. Dur-
ing all the time of my stay at Bowness in Westmoreland,
from Oct. 20 to Nov. 20, there was day by day, with the
exception of the first three days after my departure, need
to wait upon God for daily supplies for the orphans. In
consequence of this, every donation, without exception,
which was received during my absence, came in most
seasonably. Partly on account of my health, and partly
on account of opportunities for service in Westmoreland
and elsewhere, I did not feel it right to return to Bristol
sooner than I did, though there was such great poverty ;
nor could I have done anything in Bristol which I could
not do in Westmoreland, as it regards procuring means,
since prayer and faith are all the means I make use of to
obtain supplies when we are in need.
Dec. 23. The need of to-day was eleven pounds. This
sum the Lord gave me thus : Last evening I received one
pound, together with a pair of trousers and gaiters, and a
1847. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 329
remnant of fustian for the orphans. But as I knew how
much there would be needed to-day, I waited further upon
the Lord this morning for help, and, in ONE MINUTE after I
had risen from my knees, I received a letter from Liver-
pool with ten pounds for the orphans. The donor writes :
" I have had the inclosed ten-pound note in my drawer
for some time, intending to send it to you for the orphans ;
but my time is so occupied that at a suitable time when at
my desk I have overlooked it. I now, however, inclose
it," etc. How seasonable this help ! How exactly to the
very shilling what is needed to-day! How remarkable
that just now this donor in Liverpool is led to send the
ten pounds which had been, according to his own words,
for some time in his drawer for the purpose of sending it !
All this abundantly proves the most minute and particular
providence of God, and his readiness to answer the suppli-
cations of his children.
Dec. 30. When this day began, I was without any-
thing for the necessities of the day, though I had reason
to believe that several pounds would again be required. I
was therefore again looking out for fresh supplies. Ac-
cordingly, about ten o'clock this morning, a brother in
the Lord, who had come last evening to stay for a night
in my house, gave me ten pounds, to be used as it might
be most needed. To be noticed in connection with this
donation is : 1. I had, not long since, received a donation
from him. 2. This brother had generally stated how he
wished his donations to be appropriated, and they had
been chiefly for missionary purposes ; but this time he left
it to me to use this money, as most needed, and therefore
I could take of it what was needed for the orphans. 3. I
was now extremely poor also with regard to the funds for
all the other objects, so that I was obliged to tell the
teachers of the day schools last Tuesday evening, 28th,
that if no fresh supplies came in, I should not be able to
28*
330 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP.
give them their weekly salaries, as usual, next Tuesday
evening, being now poorer in this particular than I had
been for years. How kind therefore of the Lord, not only
to give me this money through this brother at this time,
but also to dispose his heart to leave the application of it
to me as most needed. I took half of it for this day's
housekeeping expenses for the orphans, and half for the
school fund, for the weekly salaries of the teachers next
Tuesday. I also received further this morning a half
sovereign from Droitwich. The little that was left, after
the housekeeping expenses were met, was put by for rent
and the expenses for the apprentices, and I was again
without a penny, looking out for .fresh supplies for to-
morrow.
Dec. 31, 1847. The last day of another year had now
come. Great and many had been the mercies of God to
me this year in every way, particularly also in connection
with the orphans ; but now I had again nothing for to-day,
except two shillings which are in one of the boxes in my
house. I was, however, by God's grace, able to look out
for supplies for this last day of another year also, being
fully assured that the Lord would not confound me. And
thus it has beer, according to my expectation ; for, before
I was called on for money, I received one hundred pounds,
which was left to me to apply to any part of the Lord's
service where there seemed the most need.
Feb. 2, 1848. This morning, on my walk before break-
fast, I felt myself led out of my usual track into a direction
in which I had not gone for some months. In stepping
over a stile I said to myself : " Perhaps God has a reason
even in this." About five minutes afterwards I met a
Christian gentleman who gave me two sovereigns for the
orphans, and then I knew the reason why I had been led
this way.
Feb. 3. The reader might say, " You are continually in
1848. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 331
need. JVb sooner is the one demand met, than another
comes. Do you not find it a trying life, and are you not
tired of it?" My reply is, It is true I am more or less
continually in need in connection with this work. And if
I were to tell out all my heart to the reader concerning it,
he would have still more reason to say that I am con tin •
ually in need. For what I have here written is almost
exclusively about the way in which God has been pleased
to supply me with money for carrying on the work ; but I
do deliberately state that this, much as it might appear to
one or the other, is by no means the chief thing that I stand
in need of from day to day. I will just hint at a few
other things. Sickness among the children, very difficult
and tedious cases, in which, notwithstanding all the means
which are used month after month, yea, year after year,
the children remain ill. Nothing remains but either to
keep them, or to send them to the Parish Union, to which
they belong, as they have no relatives able to provide for
them. The very fact of having cared for them and
watched over them for years only endears them the more
to us, and would make it the more trying to send them
back to their parish. This is a " need " which brings me
to God. Here is prayer required, not only for means
which such sick children call for, but for guidance and
wisdom from on high.
Sometimes children are to be placed out as servants or
apprentices. A suitable place is needed, or else they had
better remain under our care. The obtaining of this suit-
able place is a " need " indeed. It is more difficult to be
obtained than money. Sometimes for many weeks have I
had to wait upon God to have this " need " supplied ; but
he has always at last helped. Sometimes great has been
5ny " need " of wisdom and guidance in order to know
how certain children ought to be treated under particular
circumstances ; and especially how to behave towards cer-
332 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XYIIL
tain apprentices or servants who were formerly in the Or-
phan Houses. A " need " in this respect is no small thing ;
though I have found that in this and in all othej* matters,
concerning which I was in " need," I have been helped,
provided I was indeed able to wait patiently upon God.
That word, " godliness is profitable unto all things, having
promise of the life that now is and of that which is to
come," (1 Tim. iv. 8,) I have in times almost without num-
ber found to be true in my own experience.
Further, when one or the other of the laborers needed
to leave the work on account of health, or for other
reasons, I have been at such times in far greater " need "
than when I required money for the various objects of the
Institution. I could only have such " need " supplied by
waiting upon God. I could do nothing but speak to my
heavenly Father about this matter, and he has always
helped. One of the greatest difficulties connected with
this work is to obtain suitable godly persons for it; so
many things are to be taken into the account. Suitable
age, health, gift, experience, love for children, true godli-
ness, a ready mind to serve God in the work and not
themselves, a ready mind to bear with the many trials and
difficulties connected with it, a manifest purpose to labor,
not for the sake of the remuneration, but to serve God in
their work ; surely, to obtain godly persons, in whom these
qualifications even in some measure are found combined, is
not an easy matter. Not that any one will suppose me to
mean that I am looking out for perfect fellow-laborers.
Not that any one will suppose that my fellow-laborers are
referred to by me as if they were without weaknesses,
deficiencies, and failings. I am myself far, very far from
being without weaknesses, deficiencies, and failings. More-
over, I never expect to find fellow-laborers for this work
who have not their weaknesses; but this I do mean to say^
that the work of God in my hands is of that character,
1848. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 335
and, by God's grace, is really carried on with such a true
purpose to serve God thereby (however much I and my
fellow-laborers may fail), that it is with me a matter of
deep moment to find truly suitable individuals for it, in
whom, as much as possible, the above qualifications should
be found united. And, however much there may be want-
ing, this is more and more my aim, that I may obtain, such
helpers ; and hence it can be easily perceived how great
my " need " must be again and again on this very account.
I do here especially advise, that if any should apply in
future for situations in connection with this work, they
would keep these remarks before them; for, by God's
grace, it is my purpose never to give to any persons a
situation in connection with the Institution, if they are
not suitable for it according to the light which God
gives me.
Further, that the laborers work happily together among
themselves, and that I go on happily ia service with them ;
that I be their servant, on the one hand, and yet, on the
other, maintain the place which God has given me in this
work ; surely, if any one carefully looks at this, he will at
once see that there is a difficulty and a "need" far greater
than any that is connected with money. O, how these
matters lead one to call upon God ! How they continually
make one sensible of one's "need!" Truly, I am in need,
in continual need. I might refer to many more points,
in connection with this work, in which I am more or less
continually in " need ;" but 1 will only mention one. It is
now many years since I have made my boast in the living
God in so public a manner by my publications. On this
account Satan unquestionably is waiting for my halting,
and if I were left to myself I should fall a prey to him.
Pride, unbelief, or other sins would be my ruin, and lead
me to bring a most awful disgrace upon the name of Jesus.
Here is then a " need," a great " need." I do feel myself
334: THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIII.
in "need," in great "need," even to be upheld b/God;
for I cannot stand for a moment if left to myself. O that
none of my dear readers might admire me, and be aston-
ished at my faith, and think of me as if I were beyond
unbelief! O, that none of my dear readers might think
that I could not be puffed up by pride, or in other respects
most .awfully dishonor God, and thus at last, though God
has used me in blessing hitherto to so many, become a bea-
con to the church of Christ ! No, I am as weak as ever. I
need as much as ever to be upheld as to faith, and every
other grace. I am therefore in "need," in great "need ;"
and therefore help me, dear Christian reader, with your
prayers.
I allow, then, most fully that I am in continual " need."
This is the case with regard to money matters, because the
work is now so large. A few hundred pounds go but a lit-
tle way. There have often been weeks when my demands
have been several hundred pounds a week, and it can there-
fore easily be supposed that, even if large donations come
in, they do not last long. But whilst I allow this, I desire
that the Christian reader may keep in mind that there are
other necessities, and even greater ones than those con-
nected with money. Should, however, the reader say that
he thinks " I must find this a very trying life> and that 1
must be tired of it? I beg to state that he is entirely mis-
taken. I do not find the life in connection with this work
a trying life, but a very happy one. It is impossible to
describe the abundance of peace and heavenly joy that
often has flowed into my soul by means of the fresh an-
swers which I have obtained from God, after waiting upon
him for help and blessing ; and the longer I have had to
wait upon him, or the greater my need was, the greater
the enjoyment when at last the answer came, which
has often been in a very remarkable way, in order to make
the hand of God the more manifest. I do therefore sol-
1846. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 335
emnly declare that I do not find this life a trying life?, but
a very happy one, and I am consequently not in the least
tired of it. Straits and difficulties I expected from the very
beginning. Before I began this service I expected them ;
nay, the chief object of it was, that the church at large
might be strengthened in faith, and be led more simply,
habitually, and unreservedly to trust in the living God, by
seeing his hand stretched out in my behalf in the hour of
need. I did, therefore, expect trials, great trials and
straits ; but cheerfully, for the glory of God, and the profit
of God's dear children, did I desire to pass through them,
if only the saints might be benefited by the dealings of
.God with me. The longer I go on in this service, the greater
the trials of one kind or another become ; but at the same
time the happier I am in this my service, and the more I
am assured that I am engaged as the Lord would have
me to be. How then could I be tired of carrying on the
work of God on such principles as I do ?
HI. THE NEW ORPHAN HOUSE ON ASHLEY DOWN.
Up to May 26, 1846, £2,710, 3s. 5Jd. had been received
toward building the new Orphan House.
July 4, 1846. For about three months my faith and
patience have been exceedingly tried about the field
which I have purchased for the building of the orphan
house, as the greatest difficulties arose about my possess-
ing the land after all ; but, by God's grace, my heart was
kept in peace, being fully assured that if the Lord were to
take this piece of land from me it would be only for the
purpose of giving me a still better one ; for our heavenly
Father never takes any earthly thing from his children ex-
cept he means to give them something better instead. But
in the midst of all this great trial of faith I could not but
think, judging from the way in which God so manifestly
336 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIIL
had given me this piece of land, that the difficulties were
only allowed /or the trial of my faith and patience. And
thus it was. Last evening I received a letter by which all
the difficulties were removed, and now, with the blessing
of God, in a few days the conveyance will be made out.
July 6. The reason why, for several months, there had
come in so little for the building fund, appeared to me
this, that we did not need the money at present ; and that
when it was needed, and when my faith and patience had
been sufficiently tried, the Lord would send more means.
And thus it has proved ; for to-day was given to me the sum
of two thousand and fifty pounds, of which two thousand
pounds is for the building fund, and fifty pounds for pres-
ent necessities.
It is impossible to describe my joy in God when I re-
ceived this donation. I was neither excited nor surprised ;
for Hook out for answers to my prayers. I believe that
God hears me. Yet my heart was so full of joy that I
could only sit before God, and admire him, like David in
2 Sam. vii. At last I cast myself flat down upon my face,
and burst forth in thanksgiving to God, and in surrender-
ing my heart afresh to him for his blessed service.
July 21. This morning a gentleman from Devonshire, on
his way to London, called on me. When he came I was
just in prayer, having, among other matters, brought also
before the Lord the following points : 1. I had been asking
him for some supplies for my own temporal necessities,
being in need. 2. I had asked him for more means for the
building fund, and besought him to hasten the matter, on
account of the inhabitants in Wilson Street, on account of
the welfare of the children and those who have the over-
sight of them in the Orphan Houses, and lastly that I might
be able to admit more orphans, the number of applications
being so great. 3. I had also asked the Lord for means for
present use for the orphans, as the outgoings are so
1846. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 337
great. 4. I had asked for means for the other objects.
When I saw this gentleman from Devonshire, he gave me
twenty pounds, of which ten pounds is to be used for the
building fund, five pounds for present use of the orphans,
two pounds for brother Craik and myself, and the remain-
ing three pounds were left to my disposal, which I applied
to the other objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institu-
tion. Thus I received, at the very moment that I had been
asJdng G-od, FOUR answers to my prayers.
Nov. 19. I am now led more and more to importune
the Lord to send me the means which are requisite in
order that I may be able to commence the building. Be-
cause, 1. It has been for some time past publicly stated in
print that I consider it is not without ground that some
of the inhabitants of Wilson Street consider themselves
inconvenienced by the Orphan Houses being in that street,
and I long therefore to be able to remove the. orphans from
thence, as soon as possible. 2. I become more and more
convinced that it would be greatly for the benefit of the
children, both physically and morally, with God's blessing,
to be in such a position as they are intended to occupy,
when the new Orphan House is built. And, 3. Because
the number of very poor and destitute orphans, that are
waiting for admission, is so great, and there are constantly
fresh applications made. Now whilst, by God's grace, I
would not wish the building to be begun one single day
sooner than it is his will ; and whilst I firmly believe that
he will give me, in his own time, every shilling which I
need ; yet I also know that he delights in being earnestly
entreated, and that he takes pleasure in the continuance in'
prayer, and in the importuning him, which so clearly is to
be seen from the parable of the widow and the unjust judge.
Luke xviii. 1-8. For these reasons I gave myself again
particularly to prayer last evening, that the Lord would
send further means, being also especially led to do so,
29
338 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIIL
in addition to the above reasons, because there had come
in but little comparatively since the 29th of last month.
This morning between five and six o'clock I prayed again,
among other points, about the building fund, and then
had a long season for the reading of the word of God. In
the course of my reading I came to Mark xi. 24 : " What
things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye re-
ceive them, and ye shall have them." The importance of
the truth contained in this portion I have often felt and
spoken about ; but this morning I felt it again most partic-
ularly, and, applying it to the new Orphan House, said to
the Lord : " Lord, I believe that thou wilt give me all I
need for this work. I am sure that I shall have all, be-
cause I believe that I receive in answer to my prayer."
Thus, with the heart full of peace concerning this work,
I went on to the other part of the chapter, and to the next
chapter. After family prayer I had again my usual season
for prayer with regard to all the many parts of the work,
and the various necessities thereof, asking also blessings
upon my fellow-laborers, upon the circulation of Bibles
and tracts, and upon the precious souls in the adult school,
the Sunday schools, the six day schools, and the four Orphan
Houses. Amidst all the many things I again made my
requests about means for the building. And now observe :
About five minutes after I had risen from my knees,
there was given to me a registered letter, containing a
check for three hundred pounds, of which two hundred
and eighty pounds are for the building fund, ten pounds
for my own personal expenses, and ten pounds for brother
Craik. The Lord's holy name be praised for this precious
encouragement, by which the building fund is now in-
creased to more than six thousand pounds.
Dec. 9. It is now four hundred days since day after
day I have been waiting upon God for help with regard to
the building of the Orphan House ; but as yet he keeps
1846. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 339
me still in the trial of faith and patience. He is stiL say-
ing, as it were, "Mine hour is not yet come." Yet he doea
sustain me in continuing to wait upon him. By his grace
my faith is not in the least shaken ; but I am quite sure
that he, in his own time, will give me everything which I
need concerning this work. How I shall be supplied with
the means which are yet requisite, and when, I know not ;
but I am sure that God will help me in his own time and
way. In the mean time I have abundant reason to praise
God that I am not waiting on him in vain ; for since this
day twelvemonth he has given me, in answer to prayer, a
most suitable piece of ground, and six thousand three hun-
dred and four pounds for the building fund, and about
two thousand seven hundred pounds for present use for
the work, so that altogether I have received, since this
day twelvemonth, solely in answer to prayer, the sum of
nine thousand pounds. Surely, I am not waiting upon the
Lord in vain ! By his help, then, I am resolved to con-
tinue this course unto the end.
Dec. 22. To-day I have again a precious proof that
continuing to wait upon the Lord is not in vain. During
this month comparatively little had come in for the build-
ing fund; yet, by God's grace, I had been enabled, as
before, yea, even with more earnestness perhaps than
before, to make known my requests unto God, being more
and more convinced that I ought to seek by earnest prayer
soon to be able to begin the building. In addition to this
I had also especially besought the Lord to give me means
for missionary brethren, and also for brethren who labor in
the word in various parts of England and Ireland, as all
my means for them were now gone. I had also been wait-
ing upon God for means to order a fresh stock of tracts. I
had lastly again and again besought the Lord to give me
me?ns for the poor saints in Bristol, of whom there are
many, and whose need is now particularly great.
340 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAK XVIII
to-day the Lord has granted me precious answers to my
requests concerning these various objects, for I received
this morning one thousand pounds, with these words : " I
send you some money, part of which you can apply to the
orphans and the other objects of your Institution, accord-
ing to their need, and the rest you can put to the building
find. At the present price of provisions your expenses
must be large for the orphans. Please also take twenty-
five pounds for your own need."
January 25, 1847. The season is now approaching
when building may be begun. Therefore with increased
earnestness I have given myself unto prayer, importuning
the Lord that he would be pleased to appear on our
behalf, and speedily send the remainder of the amount
which is required, and I have increasingly, of late, felt
that the time is drawing near when the Lord will give
me all that which is requisite for commencing the building.
All the various arguments which I have often brought
before God I brought also again this morning before him.
It is now fourteen months and three weeks since day by
day I have uttered my petitions to God on behalf of this
work. I rose from my knees this morning in full confi-
dence not only that God could, but also would, send the
means, and that soon. Never, during all these fourteen
months and three weeks, have I had the least doubt that
I should have all that which is requisite. And now, dear
believing reader, rejoice and praise with me. About an
hour after I had prayed thus, there was given to me the
sum of two thousand pounds for the building fund. Thu?
I have received altogether £9,285, 3s. 9 id. towards this
work. • I cannot describe the joy I had in God when I
received this donation. It must be known from experience
in order to be felt. Four hundred and forty-seven days I
have had to wait upon God before the sum reached tho
above amount. How great is the blessing which the soul
1848. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 341
obtains by trusting in God and by waiting patiently. Is
it not manifest how precious it is to carry on God's work
in this way, even with regard to the obtaining of means ?
From Dec. 10, 1845, to Jan. 25, 1847, being thirteen
months and a half, I have received, solely in answer to
prayer, nine thousand two hundred and eighty-five pounds.
Add to this what came in during that time for present use
for the various objects of the Institution, and the total is
about twelve thousand and five hundred pounds, entirely
the fruit of prayer to God. Can it be said, therefore, with
good ground, that this way of carrying on the work of
God may do very well in a limited and small way, but it
would not do on a large scale ? The fact brought out
here contradicts such statements.
June 23. This day the Lord in his great goodness, by a
donation of one thousand pounds for the building fund,
has again encouraged my heart abundantly to trust in him
for all that which I shall yet need to meet the remainder
of the expenses connected with the fitting up and furnish-
ing the new Orphan House, etc.
April 29, 1848. The total amount which I have received
for the building fund is £11,062, 4s. lljd. This sum
enables me to meet all the expenses connected with the
purchase of the piece of land and with the erection of the
house. I stated before that I did not mean to commence
the building until I had all the means requisite for it, and
this intention was carried out. It was not until I had a
sufficient amount of means to meet all the sums required
for the various contractors that a single thing was done ;
but when I once had as much as was required for them, I
did not consider it right to delay any longer, though I saw
then clearly, and have since seen still more clearly, that I
should need yet a considerable sum to complete the work.
For whilst in every respect the building will be most plain
and. inexpensive, yet, it being intended to be the abode of
29*
342 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XVIII.
three hundred orphans, with all their teachers and over-
seers, it necessarily must be a very large building, and waa
therefore found to be even somewhat more expensive than
I had thought, as the whole (including fittings and furni-
ture) cannot be accomplished for less than fourteen thou-
sand five hundred pounds, towards which the Lord has
already given me, as stated, eleven thousand and sixty-two
pounds four shillings elevenpence halfpenny. The sum
still needed is required for all the ordinary fittings, the
heating apparatus, the gas fittings, the furnishing the whole
house, making three large play-grounds and a small road,
and for some additional work which could not be brought
into the contracts. I did not think it needful to delay
commencing the building, though several thousand pounds
more would be required, as all these expenses needed not
to be met till many months after the beginning of the
building.
The work of the building commenced on July 5, 1847.
Six hundred and seven days I sought the help of God day
by day, before we came so far as to be able to commence
the building; yet at last he gave me the desire of my
heart.
IV. MISCELLANEOUS POINTS RESPECTING THE SCULPTURAL.
KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION FOR HOME AND ABROAD.
1. During the whole of this period six day schools, with
330 children, were supported by the funds of the Institu-
tion ; two Sunday schools were entirely supported by it,
and a third one was occasionally assisted. Again, four
from among the Sunday-school children were, during
these two years, received into church fellowship. The
total number of the children who received instruction in
the day schools of the Institution, from its commencement
up to May 26, 1848, amounted to 4,519. The number of
1848. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PROSPERITY. 343
the adult scholars who were instructed during this period
in the adult school, which was supported hy the funds of
the Institution, amounted to 292 ; and the total number
of adults who had instruction from March 5, 1834, to May
26, 1848, was 1,438. The total of the expenses connected
with all these schools, during these two years, amounted
to £886, Is. Hid.
2. During this period were circulated 649 Bibles and
232 New Testaments. There were circulated from March
5, 1834, up to May 26, 1848, 5,746 Bibles and 3,760 New
Testaments. During this period, £74, 9s. lOd. was ex-
pended of the funds of the Institution on this object.
3. From May 26, 1846, to May 26, 1848, was expended
of the funds of the Institution on missionary objects,
£1,559, 11s. 6d., whereby 43 laborers in the gospel, at
home and abroad, were assisted.
4. During this period 64,021 tracts were circulated, and
the sum of £63, Is. 5d. was expended on this object of the
funds of the Institution. The total number of tracts
circulated from Nov. 19, 1840, to May 26, 1848, amounted
to 163,668.
5. There were received into the four Orphan Houses,
from May 26, 1846, to May 26, 1848, 51 orphans, who,
together with those who were in the four houses on May
26, 1846, made up 172 in all. .
On May 26, 1848, there were 122 orphans in the four
houses. The number of the orphans under our care from
April, 1836, to May 26, 1848, was 264. The total amount
of expenditure in connection with the support of the
orphans from May 26, 1846, to May 26, 1848, was
£3,228, 5s. lid.
I notice, in connection with the Orphan Houses, that
without any one having been personally applied to for
anything by me, the sum of £24,771, 19s. 8§d. was given
to me as the result of prayer to God from the commence*
344 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XVIIL
ment of the work up to May 26, 1848. This sum includes
the £11,062, 4s. lljd., which up to May 26, 1848, had been
given towards the building fund. It may be interesting
to the reader to know that the total amount which was
given as free contributions for the other objects, from the
commencement of the work up to May 26, 1848, was
£7,060, 14s. Ifd.; and that which came in by the sale of
Bibles and tracts, and by the payment of the children in
the day schools, amounted to £2,373, 3s. 7Jd.
V. PERSONAL HISTORY.
Dec. 31, 1846. During this year there have been received
into fellowship 66. The Lord has been pleased to give
me during this year £399, 2s. lid. To this is again to be
added, what I have enlarged on in a former chapter, that
during the whole of this year also my daughter was, free
of all expenses, at a boarding-school, worth about fifty
pounds.
In November, 1847, 1 had a most remarkable deliverance,
which, to the praise of the Lord, is here recorded, as it is
a further illustration of how the Lord watches over his
children.
I was laboring for a little while at Bowness and Keswick
in the ministry of the word, in October and November.
WL i at Keswick, I stayed with my dear wife in a large
boarding-house, in which, however, we were then alone,
except a single gentleman. Just before we left Keswick,
on the morning of Nov. 24, 1 heard that the gentleman,
lodging in the same house, had shot himself during the
night, but was not quite dead. We had not heard the
report of the pistol, it being a very stormy night and the
house large. Two days after, I received from a Christian
brother at Keswick the following information respecting
the transaction.
1847. FAITH CONFIRMED BY PEOSPERITY. 345
KESWICK, Nov. 25, 1847.
DEAR MR MULLER:
The tender and Almighty care of our loving Father was never
more over you, and indeed over all of us, than in your stay at Mrs.
's. Mr. was quite deranged for two or three days
before you left. Without any control, he had been walking about
his room for the last two days and nights, with loaded pistols in his
hands. Furthermore, he had taken into his head that you were
going to kill him How gracious of God that he spread his wings
over you, and over dear Mrs. Miiller, so that Satan could not break
through the fence, to hurt even a hair of your heads. Speaking
after the manner of men, there was nothing to have hindered him
coming into the room, where we were all at tea,1 and of firing
amongst us ; but the Lord was our refuge and fortress, and pre-
served us from danger, which we knew not of. He shot himself in
the neck and breast, but is not dead. He has a strait-waistcoat on.
I assisted in cutting his clothes off, and in other little offices needed
at such a time, and told him of Christ's love in dying for poor sin-
ners. " I know it," he said. He shot himself the first tune about
three o'clock in the morning, and again about seven. What a scene
his room presented ; pistols lying in gore ; bloody knives, lancets,
and razors strewed about the floor, etc.
I add an extract from a second letter, written by the
same Christian brother, because it shows still further how
very merciful the Lord was to us at that time, in protect-
ing us.
Mr. is still alive, and has been removed by his friends
into Yorkshire. It appears, insanity is in his family, his father being
at this time in an asylum. It is evident that he had the pistols in
his pockets, but of this no one knew until after the occurrence
took place. I do not know what time of night you went to bed, but
I judge it was about ten. If so, it was at ten o'clock Mr.
came down from his bedroom, after having been there six hours. It
1 The evening before my departure I had invited a number of believers to
tea, to spend some time together in prayer, reading the Holy Scriptures, and
ki intercourse on spiritual subjects.
346 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XV HI
was a mercy you did not meet him, as it is plain that he had loaded
pistols on his person.
Dec. 31, 1847. There have been received into fellow
ship, during this year, 39 ; and altogether, since Mr. Craik
and I began laboring in Bristol, 1,157, besides the 68 whom
we found in fellowship. During this year the Lord has
been pleased to give me £412, 18s. Sid. To this is again
to be added the free education of my dear daughter, at a
boarding-school, worth to us at least fifty pounds.
In April, 1848, I was enabled, by the help of the Lord,
to complete all the arrangements for the publication of the
Narrative of the Lord's dealings with me, in the French
language; and about September of the same year the
book appeared, under the following title : " Expose de
quelques-unes des dispensations de Dieu envers Georges
Miiller. Paris, ]ibrairie Protestante, Hue Tronchet, 2."
CHAPTER XIX.
CONTINUED MERCIES.
1848 — 1850.
HUMBLE BEGINNINGS — DEVISING LIBERAL THINGS — THE ORPHANS PRO-
VIDED FOR — A MEMORABLE DAY — MONEY "AT INTEREST " — MEANS
FROM AN UNEXPECTED SOURCE — THE PROGRESS OF THE NEW ORPHAN
HOUSE— MEANS PROVIDED FOR ITS COMPLETION — INEXPRESSIBLE DE-
LIGHT IN GOD — REVIEW OF THE TWO YEARS PAST.
On the 26th of May, 1848, I had on hand for the
Bible, tract, missionary, and school funds of the Scrip-
tural Knowledge Institution, five pounds nineteen shillings
sevenpence one farthing ; a sum so small, that, without the
help of God, I could not have gone on even for a few
days ; for during this period our average expenditure for
one single day, merely for this part of the work, was as
much as the whole balance left in hand. Now see how
God carried me through, in meeting the expenditure of
the thousands of pounds which were laid out for these
objects, irrespective of the orphan work, from May 26, 1848,
to May 26, 1850.
On the very next day, after the accounts were closed,
May 27, 1848, I received from Westmoreland five pounds,
being the first donation during this period towards this
part of the work, of which sum one half was intended
by the donor for the current expenses of the orphans, and
348 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIX.
the other half for these objects. On the following day,
May 28, was anonymously put into the chapel boxes for
missions one shilling sixpence, and twopence. Now it
happened so that all the expenses, connected with these
objects, during the first two days amounted only to about
three pounds, which I was able to meet by what had come
in and the balance left in hand ; and on May 29 I received
one hundred pounds. As the application of this sum was
left to me, I took one half of it for the orphans, and the
other half for these objects. Thus I was supplied with
means to meet the expenses which came on me the follow-
ing day, May 30, when I had to pay the weekly salaries of
the teachers in the day schools.
June 9. Great has been my desire, and many have been
my prayers to God, that he would be pleased to conde-
scend to use me still further, in allowing me the privilege
of helping brethren who labor in the word and doctrine,
at home and abroad, without any salary, as I have been
able to do but very little for them comparatively during
the last four months. Now at last, in answer to my prayers,
I have received this morning one hundred and sixty
pounds for home and foreign laborers. The Lord may
see it needful, for the trial of our faith, to seem for a season
not to regard our supplications ; yet, if we patiently and
believingly continue to wait upon him, it will be manifest,
in his own time and way, that we did not call upon him in
vain.
July 12. My soul has been longing for further supplies
for home and foreign laborers, to whom I have sent of late
all I could. Almost all the letters which I have received
from the brethren, to whom I have sent money, have shown
to me their great need. Some were in the greatest neces-
sity when my remittances were received by them. Under
these circumstances a donation of one hundred and seven-
teen pounds two shillings sevenpence came in this morn-
1850. CONTINUED MF3CIES. 349
ing, of which I took fifty pounds for these objects, and
sixty-seven pounds two shillings sevenpence for the
orphans.
Nov. 9. Only a few shillings were left in my hands on
Tuesday evening, the 7th instant, towards the weekly sala-
ries of the teachers, for the coming week. Also, almost all
the tracts are again gone, and it is nearly four weeks since
I paid out the last money I had in hand for missionary ob-
jects. As to this latter point, my heart had been especially
longing to be able to send again help to home and foreign
laborers, knowing how very great the need of many is.
Thus I was situated with regard to means, when I received
to-day one thousand pounds.
Since March 5, 1834, I have received above forty-four
thousand pounds altogether [up to May 26, 1850, only] ;
and so has the Lord enlarged the work and helped me
that during the last three years I have had the privilege
of paying away in his service, in connection with this work,
about twenty-five thousand pounds; nor have I had
during this period, in any one instance, to meet a payment
without being previously provided by the Lord with means
for it. If it pleased the Lord to condescend to use me
further in this way, he could so order it that even a still
larger field of labor were intrusted to me, which would
require still greater sums. Truly, it must be manifest to all
simple-hearted children of God, who will carefully read
the accounts respecting this Institution, that he is most
willing to attend to the supplications of his children who
in their need cry to him ; and to make this manifest is the
great object I aim at, through the means of this In-
stitution.
Jan. 2, 1850. The new year commences, even as to this
part of the work, with new mercies. There was given to
me one hundred and sixty pounds, to be used as might ba
most needed.
30
S50 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAV. XIX.
Jan. 30. During this month I had been especially led
to send much assistance to home and foreign laborers.
Also in other respects the expenses for these objects had
been considerable. On this account the funds for them
had been reduced to about eighty pounds when I received
this evening four hundred and fifty pounds, of which the
donor kindly wished me to take fifty pounds for my own
personal expenses, to give to brother Craik fifty pounds,
and to use the other as might be most needed.
May 3. The work is now large, the outgoings great.
During the month were again expended about five hun-
dred pounds for the various objects of the Institution, nor
have I any prospect that the expenses will decrease ; yea, 1
have no desire that they should. I have as great satisfac-
tion, as much joy, in writing checks for large amounts
upon my bankers, as I have joy in paying over to them
checks, or bank orders, or large notes, wrhich I receive
from the living God, by means of donors, for this work.
For the money is of no more value to me than as I can
use it for God ; and the more I can pay out for the work
of God, the more prospect I have of being again supplied
by him ; and the larger the sum is which I can obtain from
him, in answer to prayer only, the greater the proof of
the blessedness and the reality of this mode of dealing
directly with the living God for what I need ; therefore,
I say, I have as much joy in giving out as in receiving. I
have been devoting myself, for instance, with all my
might, and expending much exertion both of body and
mind, but especially by laboring in spirit to have the
Orphan House filled with children, not only that thus
three hundred destitute orphans, none of whom have
either father or mother, might be lodged, boarded, clothed,
instructed, and in every way cared for, bodily, mentally,
and spiritually ; but also in order that thus large sums
might be needed and expended, and I might have a greater
1949. CONTINUED MERCIES. 351
call than ever to draw largely upon the inexhaustible treas-
ures of God. That I do not mean, in thus speaking, to
say that money so obtained by prayer may be wasted, will
scarcely need to be noticed ; for if any one would obtain
means from God by prayer only, and then waste them, he
would soon find that he was not able to pray in faith for
further supplies.
When the accounts were closed, on May 26, 1848, I had
on hand for the orphans a balance of one pound ten shil-
lings three and three-fourths pence. With this amount
then we began, whilst day by day above one hundred and
thirty persons were to be provided for in the four Orphan
Houses in Wilson Street.
On the very next day, after the accounts were closed,
May 27, 1848, 1 received from Westmoreland five pounds,
half of which sum was intended by the donor for the
orphans, and half for the other objects. This donation I
took as an earnest out of the hands of the living God,
that during the whole of this period also he would provide
for these many orphans, as he had done in former years.
Nov. 9. Up to date the wants of the orphans have been
supplied as heretofore. Yesterday, only five shillings six-
pence came in. To-morrow more money will be needed
for housekeeping. In this our poverty I received this
morning one thousand pounds. The money being left to
my disposal as it might be most needed, I took of it six
hundred pounds for the building fund, three hundred pounds
for missionary purposes and the circulation of Bibles and
tracts, and one hundred pounds for present use for the
orphans. I have thus the means which are yet needed for
this week's housekeeping expenses, besides being able to
meet other heavy expenses which are before me next week.
Feb. 20, 1849. For three months and ten days, since
NTov. 9, 1848, the donations had always come in so that we
352 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIX.
abounded during the whole period, there having been
always fresh donations received before all the money in
hand was disbursed. The total amount that came in
during this period was four hundred and sixty-nine pounds
fourteen shillings tenpence. Now to-day there was no
money in hand for advancing the amount needed for the
next week's housekeeping. All the money in hand was
due for rent, and therefore unavailable, as I never go into
debt for anything. In this our need there was given to
me this afternoon the sum of two hundred pounds, which
was left to my disposal for fitting up the new Orphan
House, or for any of the objects in connection with the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution that might be in need.
As, however, I have all the means for fitting up and fur-
nishing the new Orphan House, as far as I know, and as
there is no money in hand for the present use of the
orphans, I took one hundred pounds for that object.
March 9. The new Orphan House is now nearly ready.
On this account we have to get in large supplies for the
children's clothes. Within the last few days I have
ordered thousands of yards of material for this purpose,
and thousands more will need to be ordered, besides pro-
viding a stock of many other things. For this large sums
are needed. Under these circumstances I received to-day
a donation of three hundred pounds, to be used for the
building fund, or the current expenses of the various
objects, just as it might be most required. As I judge
that we have all that is needed for the fitting up and fur-
nishing of the house, and as there is more in hand than
usual for the missionary objects, the circulation of Bibles
and tracts, and for the various schools, and as we have
only about sixty pounds for present use for the orphans,
towards meeting all the heavy expenses before us, I took
the whole of this donation for the orphans, as the donor
has kindly left the disposal of the money entirely to me.
1849. CONTINUED MERCIES. 355
This donation coming in just now has been an exceedingly
great refreshment to my spirit ; for it is at the commence-
ment of the great increase of our expenses, in connection
with the three hundred orphans, instead of one hundred
and twenty, like an earnest from God that he will supply
us also with means when the demands for the three hun-
dred will be more than twice as great as they are now.
Through this donation I have means to meet all the ex-
pense which will be incurred in getting in for the uew
establishment the stores of provisions, soap, material for
clothes, haberdashery, and of the many other articles of
which it would be desirable to buy our supplies on whole-
sale terms. The Lord be praised for his kindness !
June 18. To-day, as the fruit of the prayers of three
years and seven months, the children began to be moved
from the four Orphan Houses in Wilson Street, Bristol,
into the new Orphan House.
June 23. Saturday Evening. This has been indeed a
week of great and many and peculiar mercies. All the
orphans with their teachers and overseers have been
moved into the new Orphan House during Monday, Tues-
day, Wednesday, and Thursday ; so that there are now
about one hundred and forty persons under one roo£
The Lord has most signally helped. As I had for more
than three years sought the help of God concerning all
matters connected with the new Orphan House, I did
expect his help in this particular also ; but he has done
beyond my expectations. Though only the day before
yesterday the last children were moved in, there is already
such a measure of order established in the house, by the
help of God, as that things can be done by the minute
hands of the timepieces. His name is to be praised for
this, and my soul does magnify him for his goodness !
Also with regard to temporal supplies for the dear orphans,
the Lord has been exceedingly kind. On the second
30*
354 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XIX.
day of receiving the children, there was sent twenty
pounds. On the third day, an individual who walked
with me through part of the house said, " These children
must consume a great deal of provisions," and, whilst say-
ing it, took out of his pocket a roll of Bank of England
notes to the amount of one hundred pounds, and gave
them to me for the orphans. On the same evening I had
also sent for the orphans a very large cask of treacle, and
for their teachers and overseers six loaves of sugar. Also a
cooper made gratuitously two large new casks for treacle.
On the next day I received information that about one
thousand pounds of rice had been purchased for the or-
phans, which should be sent. Besides this, several small
donations have come in. So bountifully has the Lord
been pleased to help of late, that I have not only been able
to meet all the extraordinary heavy expenses connected
with moving the orphans from Wilson Street into the new
Orphan House, filling the stores of the new Orphan House,
etc. ; but I have more than five hundred pounds in hand
to begin housekeeping in the new Orphan House. How
true that word that those that trust in the Lord shall not
be confounded ! After all the many and long-continued
seasons of great trial of faith within these thirteen years
and two months, during which the orphans were in Wilson
Street, the Lord dismisses us from thence in comparative
abundance. His holy name be praised for it !
Aug. 30. Received a fifty-pound note with these words :
"I send you herewith a fifty -pound note, half for the mis-
sions, half for the orphans, unless you are in any personal
need; if so, take five pounds for yourself. This will be the
List large sum I shall be able to transmit to you. Almost
all the rest is already out at interest" I took half of this fifty
pounds for the orphans, and half for missionaries. The
writer sold some time since his only earthly possession, and
Bent me at different times sums of one hundred and twenty
lf?50. CONTINUED MERCIES. 355
pounds, of one hundred pounds, of fifty-five pounds, of
fifty pounds, and of twenty pounds for the work of the
Lord in my hands. When he says, therefore, " the rest is
already out at interest? he means that he has given it
away for the Lord, which indeed both for time and eter-
nity is the very best way of using the means with which
the Lord may be pleased to intrust us, in so far as, consid-
ering in the fear of God all our various claims and duties
and relationships, we may do so. As this is written for the
spiritual profit of the reader, I cannot but add to this ex-
tract from my journal under Aug. 30, 1849, that since that
time I have received other donations from the same donor,
and much larger still. He used for God the means with
which he was pleased to intrust him, and, contrary to this
brother's expectation, the above fifty pounds was not the
last large donation ; for it pleased God soon after to intrust
him with another considerable sum, which he again used
for the Lord. This did not at all surprise me ; for it is the
Lord's order that, in whatever way he is pleased to make
us his stewards, whether as to temporal or spiritual things,
if we are indeed acting as stewards, and not as owners, he
will make us stewards over more.
Jan. 9, 1850. To-day was sent to me from the Com-
mittee of the Cholera Fund in Bristol, twenty pounds,
which the gentlemen constituting it had voted for the
benefit of the twenty children who had lost their parents
in the cholera, and whom I had received into the new
Orphan House.
I had not applied either directly or indirectly for this
money ; indeed, I was reluctant even to give information
as to the number of cholera orphans whom I had received,
lest there should be even the appearance as if after all I
asked for money, instead of solely trusting in the living
God. But some of the gentlemen on the committee, I
understand, knowing the fact that I had received many
356 THE LIFE OP TKUST. CHAP. XIX,
orphans, made such by means of the cholera, proposed
that there should be paid to the Institution a sovereign on
account of each such child whom I had received. This
Bum was especially remarkable to me as a fresh proof of
the numberless ways which God has at his command for
providing me with means.
I also cannot help noticing the remarkable coincidence
that, at the time that God visited this land with the chol-
era, in 1849, I had so much room for the reception of
orphans. The Lord was pleased to allow me the joy and
Bweet privilege of receiving altogether twenty-six children,
from ten months old and upward, who lost their parents
in the cholera at that time, and many besides, since then,
who were bereaved of their parents through this fearful
malady.
At the time when I last referred to the progress of the
new Orphan House, it was being built. A part of it was
already roofed in, and the remainder was to be roofed not
many weeks afterwards. But how much did there yet
remain to be done in other respects ! A building so con-
siderable as to contain about three hundred large windows
would require, even after it was finished, an immense
amount of labor to be fitted up and furnished for three
hundred and thirty persons. Then, after this was done,
the settling in of the orphans and their teachers, and other
overseers, needed still more abundant help. Further, the
obtaining of suitable helpers for this part of the work was
indeed no small matter. Lastly, though the Lord had
been pleased to give me already above eleven thousand
pounds for the new Orphan House, yet I needed several
thousand pounds more, in order to bring the whole into
such a state as might render the building fit for the recep-
tion of the orphans. And now, in looking back, and find-
ing that I not only was helped in all these matters, but
also in every one of them far beyond my largest expecta-
»848. CONTINUED MERCIES. 357
tions, does it not become me to say to those who love the
Lord Jesus, and into whose hands this account may fall :
" O magnify the Lord with me, and let us exalt his name
together ! " Each one of the foregoing difficulties which
still existed on the 26th of May, 1848, was so great, that
if only one of them had remained, and I had not been
Lelped, what would have been the result ? But while the
prospect before me would have been overwhelming had I
looked at it naturally, I was never, even for once, per-
mitted to question what would be the end. For as, from
the beginning, I was sure that it was the will of God that
I should go to the work of building for him this large
Orphan House, so also, from the beginning, I was as certain
that the whole would be finished as if the building had
been already before my natural eyes, and as if the house
had been already filled with three hundred destitute or-
phans. I was therefore of good courage in the midst of
an overwhelming pressure of work yet to be done, and
very many difficulties yet to be overcome, and thousands
of pounds yet needed ; and I gave myself still further to
prayer, and sought still further to exercise faith on the
promises of God. And now the work is done, the diffi-
culties are overcome, all the money that was needed has
been obtained, and even more than I needed ; and, as to
helpers in the work, I have obtained even beyond my
expectations and prayers. Nearly seven years have passed
away (1856) since the new Orphan House was opened,
and about three hundred and thirty persons sit down in it
day by day to their meals.
Up to May 26, 1848, 1 had received altogether towards
meeting the expenses connected with the building of the
new Orphan House the sum of eleven thousand and sixty-
two pounds four shillings elevenpence halfpenny.
Aug. i9. It is this day a twelvemonth since the founda-
358 THE LIFE OF 1RUST. CHAP. XIX.
tion stone of the new Orphan House was laid, and now
the building is up, and almost entirely roofed in. Also
part of the inside plastering is already done. How can
my soul sufficiently magnify the Lord for all the help
which he has been pleased to give since this day twelve-
month ! As we are now so far advanced, I have been in-
creasingly entreating God that he would be pleased to
give me the means which are yet requisite for fitting up
and furnishing the house ; for even now I am completely
depending upon him for considerable sums to accomplish
this. But while much is still needed, I have never had,
by God's grace, the least misgiving as to his willingness
to give me all I need ; on the contrary, I have been
assured that, when I actually required the money for the
fittings and the furniture, it would come. And now this
day the Lord has again proved to me how willing he is to
act according to my faith ; for there was given to me this
morning eight hundred and eighty-seven pounds, under
the kind condition that I should take of it twenty pounds
for my own personal expenses, and the rest might be used
for the building fund, or the present need of the various
objects of the Institution, as it appeared best to me.
Nov. 9. To-day the Lord has helped still more abun-
dantly. I have received a donation of one thousand
pounds, to be used for the building fund and the present
necessities of the work generally, as the various objects of
the Institution might require it.
Jan. 17, 1849. The time is now near when further
steps are to be taken to fit up and furnish the house, as
more than two thirds of the rooms are all but ready.
Under these circumstances I have prayed the more ear-
nestly, day by day, that the Lord would be pleased to give
me the means which are yet needed ; and as my heart has
beeii assured from the beginning, and all through these
three years and two months, since I first began to pray
1849. CONTINUED MERCIES. 359
about this subject, that God would in every way help me
in this work, so I have also been particularly satisfied that
he would be pleased to provide the means which may be
required to meet all the heavy expenses which yet remain
to be met. Now, to-day I have had again a precious answer
to my daily supplications with reference to this work;
for I received this evening six hundred pounds, concerning
which it was desired that brother Craik and myself should
each take of it fifty pounds for ourselves ; the remaining
five hundred pounds was left entirely to my disposal ; yet
an especial reference was made to the heavy expenses con-
nected with fitting up and furnishing the new Orphan
House, towards which I might, either in part or entirely,
take this sum.
Feb. 12. The new Orphan House is now almost entirely
finished. In six weeks, with the help of God, all will be
completed. On this account I have been during the last
fortnight much occupied in making the necessary arrange-
ments for fitting it up and furnishing it ; but the more I
have been occupied about this, the more I have seen how
large a sum the whole of the fittings and the furniture will
require ; and this consideration has led me still more
earnestly of late to entreat the Lord that he would be
pleased to give me the means which may yet be needed
for the completion of the whole. Under these circum-
stances a brother in the Lord came to me this morning,
and after a few minutes' conversation gave me two thou-
sand pounds, concerning which sum he kindly gave me per-
mission to use it for the fitting up and furnishing of the
new Orphan House, or for anything else needed in con-
nection with the orphans. I have placed the whole of this
eum, at least for the present, to the building fund. ISTow,
dear reader, place yourself in my position. Eleven hun-
dred and ninety-five days it is since I began asking the
Lord for means for the building and fitting up of an
360 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIX.
Orphan House. Day by day have I, by his grace, since
that time, continued to bring this matter before him.
Without one moment's doubt, or misgiving, or wavering,
have I been enabled to trust in God for the means. From
the beginning, after I had once ascertained the will of God
concerning this work, have I been assured that he would
bring it about ; yea, as sure have I been from the be-
ginning that he would do so, as if I had already had all the
means in hand for it, or as if the house had been actually
before me, occupied by the children. But though to faith
even three years ago the whole work was accomplished,
to sight there remained many and great difficulties to be
overcome. And even at the commencement of this day
there remained many difficulties in the way of means, as
well as in other respects ; and therefore I was on the point
of giving myself again* especially to prayer, at the very
moment when I was informed that the donor of the above-
mentioned two thousand pounds had called to see me.
Now I have the means, as far as I can see, which will
enable me to meet all the expenses ; and in all probability
I shall have even several hundred pounds more than are
needed. Thus the Lord shows that he can and will not
only give as much as is absolutely needed for his work, but
also that he can and will give abundantly. It is impossible
to describe the real joy I had in God when I received this
sum. I was calm, not in the least excited, able to go on
immediately with other work that came upon me at once
after I had received the donation ; but inexpressible was
the delight which I had in God, who had thus given me
the full answer to my thousands of prayers, during these
eleven hundred and ninety-five days.
I have thus given a few out of the hundreds of dona-
tions, varying from one farthing to two thousand pounds,
as specimens, to show how the Lord was pleased to furnish
me with the means. The total amount which came in for
1850. CONTINUED MERCIES. 361
the building fund was fifteen thousand seven hundred and
eighty-four pounds eighteen shillings tenpence.
After all the expenses had been met for the purchase of
the land, the conveyance of the same, the enrolment of
the trust-deeds in chancery, the building, fitting up, and
furnishing of the new Orphan House, there remained a
balance of seven hundred and seventy-six pounds fourteen
shillings threepence three farthings, affording a manifest
proof that the Lord cannot only supply us with all we
need in his service, simply in answer to prayer, but that he
can also give us even more than we need.
During the whole of the two years ending May 26,
1850, five day schools, with 329 children in them, were en-
tirely supported by the funds of this Institution ; and some
pecuniary assistance was rendered to four other day schools.
Also a Sunday scho'ol, with 168 children, was entirely sup-
ported, and another was occasionally assisted. Lastly, an
adult school, with 106 adult scholars, was supported
during this period. There was expended on these various
schools £851, Is. 5 id., during these two years. The
number of all the children that were taught in the day
schools, through the medium of this Institution, from
March 5, 1834, to May 26, 1850, amounted to 5,114;
the number of those in the Sunday schools amounted to
2,200 ; and the number of the persons in the adult school
to 1,737. In all, 9,051.
From May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1850, were circulated 719
Bibles, and 239 New Testaments. There was expended
on this object, during this period, of the funds of the In-
stitution, £104, 15s. lid. There were circulated altogether
from March 5, 1834, to May 26, 1850, 6,465 Bibles, and
3,099 New Testaments.
From May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1850, were spent
£2,574, 16s. 6d. of the funds of the Institution for mis
31
362 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XIX.
eionary objects, whereby forty preachers of the gospel in
British Guiana, the East Indies, Switzerland, France, Ger-
many, Canada, Scotland, Ireland, and England, were
assisted.
The reader will notice how greatly this object of the
Institution was increased during the last four years previ-
ous to May 26, 1850. This arose from the fact that, in
the early part of 1846, the need of certain brethren who
labored in the word and doctrine came before me, and God
laid them on my heart to labor for them in prayer, in order
that I might obtain means from him for such brethren to a
greater extent than I had done before. Ever since then
the Lord has been pleased increasingly to use me in this
way. For from May 26, 1846, to May 26, 1848, there was
spent for that object nearly three times as much as during
any former period of the same length ; and during the
period from May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1850, I was not
only allowed to do as much as before, but to expend even
£1,016, 5s. more than during the former period, notwith-
standing all the many heavy additional expenses for the
various other objects of the Institution.
It is my sweet privilege to state that the labors of many
of these forty servants of the Lord, whom I assisted,
especially owned of God during these two years. There
fcook place very many conversions through their instru-
mentality.
From May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1850, the sum of £184,
9s. 4Jd. was expended on the circulation of tracts. There
were circulated during this period 130,464 tracts. The
total number which was circulated from Nov. 19, 1840, up
to May 26, 1850, amounted to 294,128.
From July 24, 1849, up to May 26, 1850, altogether 170
orphans were received, from ten months old and upwards.
On May 26, 1850, there were, therefore, 275 orphans in
the new Orphan House ; and with the teachers, overseers,
1850. CONTINUED MERCIES. 363
nurses, and in-door and out-door servants, etc., the whole
number of persons connected with the establishment was
308. The total number of orphans who were under our
care from 'April, 1836, up to May 26, 1850, was 443.
Without any one having been personally applied to for
anything by me, the sum of £33,868, 11s. l^d. was given to
nie for the orphans, as the result of prayer to God, from
the commencement of the work up to May 26, 1850. It
may be also interesting to the reader to know that the
total amount which was given as free contributions, for
the other objects, from the commencement of the work up
to May 26, 1850, amounted to £10,531, 3s. 3.]d.; and that
which came in by the sale of Bibles and tracts, and by
the payments of the children in the schools, up to May 26,
1850, amounted to £2,707, 9s. 3Jd.
The total of the current expenses for the orphans from
May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1849, was £1,559, 6s. 9d., and the
total of the current expenses for them from May 26, 1849,
to May 26, 1850, was only £2,665, 13s. 2|d., i. e. only about
£1,100 more than the previous year.
As to matters connected with my own personal affairs,
from May 26, 1848, to May 26, 1850 : —
Dec. 31, 1848. During this year the Lord was pleased
to give me £474, 17s. 7d. To this is again to be added, for
this year also, as before stated, the free education of my
daughter at a boarding-school, worth at least £50.
Dec. 31, 1849. The Lord sent me, during the past year,
£413, 2s. 4d.
CHAPTER XX.
A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH.
1850—1851.
PAST MERCIES AN ENCOURAGEMENT TO NEW UNDERTAKINGS — A HOUSE FOfc
SEVEN HUNDRED ORPHANS PROPOSED — WALKING BY FAITH — COUNSEL
BOUGHT FROM GOD — THE PURPOSE FORMED — DELIGHT IN THE MAGNI-
TUDE AND DIFFICULTY OF THE DESIGN.
DECEMBER 5, 1850. It is now sixteen years and nine
months this evening since I began the Scriptural Knowl-
edge Institution for Home and Abroad. This Institution
was in its beginning exceedingly small. Now it is so large
that I have not only disbursed, since its commencement,
about fifty thousand pounds sterling, but that also the cur-
rent expenses, after the rate of the last months, amount
to above six thousand pounds a year. I did " open my
mouth wide," this very evening fifteen years ago, and
the Lord has filled it. The new Orphan House is now
inhabited by three hundred orphans ; and there are alto-
gether three hundred and thirty-five persons connected
with it. My labor is abundant. The separation from my
dear wife and child is great, on account of my being
the greater part of the day, at the new Orphan House;
sometimes also by night. But notwithstanding all this,
I have again and again thought about laboring more
than ever in serving poor orphans. Within the last ten
1850 A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 365
days this matter has much occupied my mind, and for
the last five days I have had much prayer about it. It
has passed through my mind to build another Orphan
House, large enough for seven hundred orphans, so that I
might be able to care for one thousand altogether. The
points which have led me to this thought are : 1. The many
distressing cases of children, bereaved of both parents, who
have no helper. I have received two hundred and seven
orphans within the last sixteen months, and have now
seventy-eight waiting for admission, without having vacan-
cies for any. I had about sixty children waiting for admis-
sion about sixteen months since, so about two hundred
and thirty children have been applied for within these six-
teen months. But, humanly speaking, for the next sixteen
months the number of applications will be far greater, as
the work is now so much more widely known ; except it
be that persons may hear that the new Orphan House is
quite full, and on that account may consider it useless to
apply. 2. The constitution of most other charitable insti-
tutions for orphans makes the admission of a really des-
titute orphan, i. e. a child bereaved of both parents, and
without an influential friend, very difficult, if not hope-
less ; for the admission by means of the votes of the donors
precludes really poor persons from having, in most in-
stances, the benefit of these institutions, as they cannot
give the time nor expend the money necessary for obtain-
ing such votes. I have myself seen that certain candi-
dates had several thousand votes. The necessity of this
arrangement being continued may be much regretted by
many who are connected with such institutions, but they
\iave no power to alter it. Ii^ our case, nothing is needed
but application to me ; and the very poorest person, with'
out influence^ icitliout friends, without any expense, no
matter where he lives, or of whatever religious denomina-
tion, who applies for children born in lawful wedlock,
31*
366 THE LIFE OF TRUST. -CHAP. XX.
bereaved of loth parents, and in destitute circumstances,
may procure their admission. Now, as the new poor-la^
is against giving relief to relatives for orphan children out
of the poor-houses ; and as there is such a difficulty for
really poor people to get their orphan relatives admitted
into ordinary orphan establishments ; I feel myself par-
ticularly called upon to be the friend of the orphan, by
making an easy way for admission, provided it is really a
destitute case. 3. The confidence which God has caused
thousands of his children to repose in me calls upon me
to make use of it to the utmost of my power, and to seek
yet more largely to be their almoner. 4. The experience
which I have had in this service now for fifteen years,
during which time I have gone from the smallest com-
mencement of the work to the having at present three
hundred orphans under my care, calls upon me to make
use of this my experience to the utmost of my power. No
member of a committee, no president of a society, could
possibly have the same experience, except he himself had
practically been engaged in such a work for a number of
years, as I have been. 5. This very experience makes
things light to me, under God's help, which were difficult
to me formerly, and which would be very difficult now to
many : might I not therefore proceed still further ? 6. If
seven hundred more young souls could be brought under
regular godly training (and their number would be re-
newed from time to time), what blessed service for the
kingdom of Christ, and what profitable expenditure of
labor, too, with the blessing of God, even for this realm, in
a civil and moral point of view ! 7. But that which out-
weighs every one of these six reasons is, lastly, this : I
began this orphan work fifteen years ago for the very pur-
pose of illustrating to the world and to the church that
there is verily a God in heaven who hears prayer ; that
God is the living God. Now, this last object is more and
1850. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 367
more fully accomplished the larger the work is, provided I
am helped in obtaining the means simply through prayer
and faith.
But whilst such like thoughts have passed through my
mind, there are others of another character. For instance:
1. I have already an abundance of work. 2. My dear
wife has already an abundance of work. Her whole time,
with little intermission (except for prayer and reading of
the Word of God), is occupied, directly or indirectly,
about tho^ orphans. 3. Am I not undertaking too much for
my bodily strength and my mental powers, by thinking
about another Orphan House? 4. Am I not going beyond
the measure of my faith in thinking about enlarging the
work so as to double or treble it ? 5. Is not this a delu-
sion of Satan, an attempt to cast me down altogether
from my sphere of usefulness, by making me to go beyond
my measure ? 6. Is it not also, perhaps, a snare to puff
me up, in attempting to build a very large Orphan House ?
Under these circumstances I can only pray that the
Lord in his tender mercy would not allow Satan to gain
an advantage over me. By the grace of God my heart
says, — Lord, if I could be sure that it is thy will that 1
should go forward in this matter, I would do so cheerfully;
and, on the other hand, if I could be sure that these are
vain, foolish, proud thoughts, that they are not from thee,
I would, by thy grace, hate them, and entirely put them
aside.
My hope is in God ; he will help me and teach me.
Judging, however, from his former dealings with me, it
would not be a strange thing to me, nor surprising, if he
called me to labor yet still more largely in this way.
The thoughts about enlarging the orphan work have
not arisen on account of an abundance of money having
lately come in ; for I have had of late to wait for about
seven weeks upon God, whilst little, very little compara-
SC8 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XX.
lively, came in, i. e. about four times as much was going
out as came in ; and, had not the Lord previously sent me
large sums, we should have been distressed indeed.
Lord, how can thy servant know thy will in this matter?
Wilt thou be pleased to teach him ?
Dec. 11. During the last six days, since writing the
above, I have been, day after day, waiting upon God con-
cerning this matter. It has generally been more or less all
the day on my heart. When I have been awaking at
night, it has not been far from my thoughts. Yet all this
without the least excitement. I am perfectly calm and
quiet respecting it. My soul would be rejoiced to go for-
ward in this service, could I be sure that the Lord would
have me to do so ; for then, notwithstanding the number-
less difficulties, all would be well, and his name would be
magnified.
On the other hand, were I assured that the Lord would
have me to be satisfied with my present sphere of service,
and that I should not pray about enlarging the work, by
his grace I could, without an effort, cheerfully yield to it ;
for he has brought me into such a state of heart that I
only desire to please him in this matter. Moreover, hith-
erto I have not spoken about this thing even to my
beloved wife, the sharer of my joys and sorrows and labors
for more than twenty years ; nor is it likely that I shall do
so for some time to come ; for I prefer quietly waiting on
the Lord, without conversing on this subject, in order that
thus I may be kept the more easily, by his blessing, from
being influenced by things from without. The burden of
my prayer concerning this matter is, that the Lord would
not allow me to make a mistake, and that he would teach
me his will. As to outward things, I have had nothing
to encourage me during these six days, but the very
reverse; for the income for the various objects of the
{Scriptural Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad
1850. A NE'V VICTORY OF FAITH. 369
has been unusually small, only six pounds fourteen shillings
altogether, while the outgoings have been one hundred and
thirty-three pounds eleven shillings sevenpence. But all
this would not weigh the least with me, could I be quite
sure that the Lord would have me to go forward.
The especial burden of my prayer, therefore, is, that God
would be pleased to teach me his will. My mind has also
been especially pondering how I could know his will satis-
factorily concerning this particular. Sure I am that I shall
be taught. I therefore desire to patiently wait for the
Lord's time, when he* shall be pleased to shine on my path
concerning this point.
Dec. 26. Fifteen days have elapsed since I wrote the
preceding paragraph. Every day since then I have con-
tinued to pray about this matter, and that with a goodly
measure <rf earnestness, by the help of God. There has
passed awfey scarcely an hour during these days in which,
whilst awake, this matter has not been more or less before
me ; but all without even a shadow of excitement. I
converse with no one about it. Hitherto have I not even
done so with my dear wife. From this I refrain still, and
deal with God alone about the matter, in order that no
outward influence and no outward excitement may keep
me from attaining unto a clear discovery of his will. I
have the fullest and most peaceful assurance that he will
clearly show me his will. This evening I have had again
an especial solemn season for prayer, to seek to know the
wTill of God. But whilst I continue to entreat and beseech
the Lord that he would not allow me to be deluded in
this business, I may say that I have scarcely any doubt
remaining on my mind as to what will be the issue, even
that I should go forward in this matter. As this, however,
is one of the most momentous steps that I have ever taken,
I judge that I cannot go about this matter with too much
•saution, prayerfulness, and deliberation. I am in no hurry
S70 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX,
about it. I could wait for years, by olod's grace, were this
his will, before even taking one single step towards this
thing, or even speaking to any one about it ; and, on the
other hand, I would set to work to-rnorrow, were the Lord
to bid me do so. This calmness of mind, this having no
will of my own in the matter, this only wishing to please
my heavenly Father in it, this only seeking his and not my
honor in it ; this state of heart, I say, is the fullest assur-
ance to me that my heart is not under a fleshly excitement,
and that if I am helped thus to go on I shall know the
will of God to the full. But, while I write thus, I cannot
but add, at the same time, that I do crave the honor and
the glorious privilege to be more and more used by the
Lord. I have served Satan much in my younger years,
and I desire now with all my might to serve God during
the remaining days of my earthly pilgrimage. I am forty-
five years and three months old. Every day decreases the
number of days that I have to stay on earth. I therefore
desire with all my might to work. There are vast multi-
tudes of orphans to be provided for. About five years
ago a brother in the Lord told me that he had seen, in an
official report, that there were at that time six thousand
young orphans in the prisons of England. My heart longs
to be instrumental in preventing such young orphans from
having to go to prison. I desire to be used by the Lord as
an instrument in providing all the necessary temporal sup-
plies, not only for the three hundred now under my care,
but for seven hundred more. I desire to alleviate yet
further the sufferings of poor dying widows, when looking
on their helpless orphans about to be left behind. I desire
yet further to assist poor persons to whom destitute
orphans are left, and who are unable to provide for them.
I desire to be allowed to provide scriptural instruction for
a thousand orphans, instead of doing so for three hundred.
I desire to expound the Holy Scriptures regularly to a
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. S'} i
thousand orphans, instead of doing so to three hundred.
I desire that thus it may be yet more abundantly manifest
that God is still the hearer and answerer of prayer, and
that he is the living God now, as he ever was and ever
will be, when he shall, simply in answer to prayer, have
condescended to provide me with a house for seven hun-
dred orphans, and with means to support them. This last
consideration is the most important point in my mind.
The Lord's honor is the principal point with me in this
whole matter ; and just because that is the case, if he
would be more glorified by my not going forward in this
business, I should, by his grace, be perfectly content to
give up all thoughts about another Orphan House. Surely,
in such a state of mind, obtained by thy Holy Spirit, thou,
0 my heavenly Father, wilt not suffer thy child to be
mistaken, much less to be deluded ! By the help of God
1 shall continue further, day by day, to wait upon him in
prayer concerning this thing till he shall bid me act.
January 2, 1851. A week ago I wrote the preceding
paragraph. During this week I have still been helped,
day by day, and more than once every day, to seek the
guidance of the Lord about another Orphan House. The
burden of my prayer has still been, that he in his great
mercy would keep me from making a mistake. During
the last week the Book of Proverbs has come in the
course of my Scripture reading, and my heart has been
refreshed, in reference to this subject, by the following
passages : " Trust in the Lord with all thine heart ; and
lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways
acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths." Prov.
iii. 5, 6. By the grace of God I do acknowledge tho Lord
in my ways, and in this thing in particular ; I have there-
fore the comfortable assurance that he will direct my paths
concerning this part of my service, as to whether I shall
be occupied in it or not. Further : " The integrity of the
372 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX
upright shall preserve them ; but the perverseness of fools
shall destroy them." Prov. xi. 3. By the grace of God I
am upright in this business. My honest purpose is to get
glory to God. Therefore I expect to be guided aright.
Further : " Commit thy works unto the Lord, and thy
thoughts shall be established." Prov. xvi. 3. I do commit
my works unto the Lord ; I therefore expect that my
thoughts will be established. My heart is more and more
coming to a calm, quiet, and settled assurance that the end
will be that the Lord will condescend to use me yet further
in the orphan work. Here, Lord, is thy servant !
Jan. 14. Twelve days have passed away since I wrote
the last paragraph. I have still day by day been enabled
to wait upon the Lord with reference to my enlarging the
orphan work. I have been during the whole of this period
also in perfect peace, which is the result of seeking in this
thing only the Lord's honor and the temporal and spiritual
benefit of my fellow-men. Without an effort could I, by
his grace, put aside all thoughts about this whole affair,
could I be only assured that it is the will of God that I
should do so; and, on the other hand, at once would I go
forward, if he would have it to be so. I have still kept
this matter entirely to myself. Though it is now about
seven weeks since day by day, more or less, my mind has
been exercised about it, and since I have daily prayed con-
cerning it, yet not one human being knows of it. As yet
I have not mentioned it even to my dear wife, in order
that thus, by quietly waiting upon the Lord, I might not be
influenced by what might be said to me on the subject.
This evening I have particularly set apart for prayer, be-
seeching the Lord once more not to allow me to be mis-
taken in this thing, and much less to be deluded by the
devil. I have also sought to let all the reasons against
building another Orphan House, and all the reasons for
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 373
doing so, pass before my mind ; and I now, for the sake of
clearness and definiteness, write them down.
Reasons AGATXST establishing another Orphan House for
Seven Hundred Orphans. — 1. Would not this be going
beyond my measure spiritually ? according to that word :
" For I say, through the grace given unto me, to every man
that is among you, not to think of himself more highly
than he ought to think; but to think soberly, accordmg as
God has dealt to every man the measure of faith." Rom.
xii. 3. Answer : If the Lord were to leave me to myself,
the tenth part of the difficulties and trials which befall me
now in connection with the various objects of the Scrip-
tural Knowledge Institution for Home and Abroad would
be enough to overwhelm me ; but, whilst he is pleased to
sustain me, I am able day by day to pass on peacefully,
and am carried through one difficulty after the other : and
thus, by God's help, even with my present measure of faith,
if continued to me, I should be enabled to bear up under
other difficulties and trials ; but I look for an increase of
faith with every fresh difficulty through which the Lord is
pleased to help me.
2. Would it not be going beyond my measure naturally,
with reference to mental and bodily strength ? Answer :
Of all the objections against establishing another Orphan
House, there is none that weighs more with me than this
one; I might say, it is the only real difficulty. This,
however, too, I am enabled to put aside and to overcome
thus : By husbanding my strength, by great order, by reg-
ular habits, by lightening the work as much as possible, by
using every help that I can, I have been enabled to get
through a vast quantity of work. My immense correspond-
ence of about three thousand letters a year I have been ena-
bled to accomplish without a secretary. The whole man-
agement and direction and the whole vast correspondence
of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution has devolved upon
32
374 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX,
icyself alone these sixteen years and ten months, and I
have been thinking that, by seeking for an efficient secre-
tary, and an efficient clerk, and an inspector of the schools,
I might, with God's help, accomplish yet more, though
much of what I have been doing hitherto would need to
be done by others. There have been several other ar-
rangements brought before my mind, since I have been
exercised about this matter, whereby, with the blessing of
God, the work might be lightened. I should certainly need
efficient helpers to carry out the plans before me ; but with
such, I, as director, might be enabled, by God's help, to
accomplish yet more.
3. There must be a limit to my work and service.
Answer : That is true, and if I were quite sure that the
present state of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution were
to be the limit, I would at once lay aside this thing ; but I
am not sure that I am come as yet to God's limit. All
these sixteen years and ten months the work has been
constantly progressing, and the Lord has helped me con-
tinually ; and now my mind is just in the same way
exercised as when, fifteen years ago, I began the orphan
work, and as when, thirteen years ago, I enlarged the
orphan work, and as when, seven years and nine months
since, I still further enlarged the orphan work, and as
when, five years and two months since, I was led to decide
on building the new Orphan House. Under these cir-
cumstances, having been helped through all these difficul-
ties, and seeing such a vast field of usefulness before me,
and as I have so many applications for the admission of
very destitute orphans, I long to be used still further, and
cannot say that as yet the Lord has brought me to his
limit.
4. Is it not like " tempting God," to think of building
another Orphan House for seven hundred more orphans?
Answer : " Tempting God " means, according to the Holy
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 375
Scriptures, to limit him in any of his attributes ; I, by his
grace, do not wish to limit his power or his willingness to
give to me, his poor servant, simply in answer to prayer,
all the means and every other help and blessing which I
shall need to build another large Orphan House.
5. You will not get the means for building and fitting
up so large an Orphan House ; and, even if you did, how
will you, at the same time, get the means for carrying on
the work which already exists ? Answer : Looking at the
matter naturally, this is indeed a weighty objection.
The new Orphan House, with its three hundred orphans
only, cost about fifteen thousand pounds to build and to fit
up and furnish, and still the expenses are not all met even
now. It will, in all probability, cost several hundred
pounds yet. And this large sum was needed, though the
style of the building is most simple, and though the field
in which it was built was comparatively cheap. After this
rate, a building to accommodate seven hundred orphans,
with the necessary ground attached to it for the cultiva-
tion of the vegetables used in the Institution, could not be
less than thirty-five thousand pounds. Now, looking at it
naturally, where is this great sum to come from ? Though
I looked at all my friends who have given hitherto, and
several have done so very liberally, yet I should have no
natural prospect whatever that I should receive this amount;
especially if it be kept in mind that I should need six or
seven thousand pounds besides, every year, for carrying on
that which is already in existence. I might, therefore, well
tremble, looking at the matter naturally, and say, I shall
never have the money for this intended Orphan House for
seven hundred children; for where is this large sum of thirty-
five thousand pounds to come from ? And even if I were to
get the money, will not persons, in giving means for such a
building fund, take it away from what they might have
gn en me for carrying on the work which exists already ?
376 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX,
But whilst thus, naturally, I have no hope of succeeding,
I am not in the least discouraged spiritually / for by faith
in the living God I say this : He has the power to give me
this thirty-five thousand pounds, and much more were it
needed ; and he has the power, in the mean time, to give
me also all the large sums required, week after week, for
meeting the current expenses for the present state of the
work. Moreover, I delight in the greatness of the. diffi-
culty as it respects the large sum needed for building and
fitting up such an establishment ; for I desire to be most
fully assured, from the very outset, that I go forward in
this matter according to the Lord's bidding! If so, he will
give me the means ; if not, I shall not have them. Nor do
I mean to apply to any one personally for pecuniary
help, but purpose to give myself to prayer for means, as
heretofore.
6. Suppose, now, you were even to succeed in getting
this large Orphan House built, how will you be able to
provide for seven hundred other orphans ? Answer :
There is much weight in this objection, looking at it
naturally. I am too much a man of business, and too
much a person of calm, quiet, cool calculation, not to feel
its force. And indeed, were I only to look at the thing
naturally, I should at once be ready to own that I am
going too far ; for the increase of expenditure for the sup-
port of these seven hundred other orphans could not be
less than eight thousand pounds a year more, so that the
current expenses of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution,
reckoning its present state, and including those eight
thousand pounds, would be about fifteen thousand pounds
a year. Now I am free to own that I have no human
prospect of obtaining such a sum year by year. But while
matters stand thus, looking at them naturally, I see no dif-
ficulty at all in them spiritually. If according to the will
of God I am enabled to go about this intended second
1851, A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 37*J
Orphan House ; and if, under his help, I shall be enabled
to finish it ; he will surely provide for those who are
gathered together in it as long as he shall be pleased to
enable me to trust in him for supplies. And here I look
back upon the way in which the Lord has led me and dealt
with me. When, about seventeen years ago, I took up,
in dependence upon the living God for means, two charity
schools, with which the Scriptural Knowledge Institution
commenced (and this involved an expense of less than
one hundred pounds a year), I had no certain prospect of
being able to meet even that small sum; but God so
helped me that I had shortly six charity schools. He
helped me then, also, and enabled me to meet all their
expenses. When, fifteen years ago, I began the orphan
work, which was connected with far heavier expenses, I
had still less prospect, according to natural reason, of
being able to meet them ; but I trusted in God, and he
helped me, and he not only enabled me to meet the cur-
rent expenses of thirty orphans in the first house rented
for them, but enabled me also soon to open another for
thirty-six more, and I was also enabled to meet all those
expenses ; for as I had begun in faith in the living God, and
not in putting my trust in my brethren in Christ, so I was
not confounded. After I had gone on some time with
these orphans in the two rented houses, about thirteen
years ago the Lord was pleased greatly to encourage me
and to increase my faith by a donation of five hundred
pounds for the orphans ; for up to that period I had never
received more than one hundred pounds at once. But this
kind donor, a stranger to me up to that time, suggested to
me the propriety of investing this sum and using only the
interest of it, as I could not expect to have the orphans
supported for a continuance in the way they had been till
then ; for that such institutions must depend upon regular
subscriptions or funded property, otherwise they could not
32*
378 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XX.
go 01. As, however, this was only a friendly hint, and no
condition under which the money was given, I took thia
five hundred pounds towards fitting up a third house, for
the reception of thirty more orphans. From that time the
work has been increasing more and more, till it has come
to what it is at present. Now, suppose I had said, seven-
teen years ago, looking at matters according to natural
reason, " The two charity schools are enough, I must not go
any further;" then the work would have stopped there.
Or, if I had had a little more trust in my exertions or my
friends, I might have taken at the utmost one or two steps
further. Instead of this, however, I looked in no degree
whatever at things according to my natural fallen reason,
and I trusted not in the circle of my Christian friends, but
in the living God ; and the result has been that there
have been since 1834 ten thousand souls under our in-
struction in the various day schools, Sunday schools, and
adult schools ; several hundred orphans have been brought
up, and many of them from their very tenderest infancy ;
several hundred thousand tracts and many thousand
copies of the Word of God have been circulated ; about
forty preachers of the gospel at home and abroad have
been, for several years, assisted in connection with the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution ; and a house has been
built and fitted up for the accommodation of three hun-
dred destitute orphans, each of whom has neither father
nor mother. How blessed therefore is it to trust in God, and
hi him alone, and not in circumstances nor friends ! Thero
is, however, one thing which I must record here, because ifc
has taken place since I last wrote in my journal on this
subject, on January 2. It is this. During these twelve days
I have received for the various objects of the Scriptural
Knowledge Institution, in smaller donations, sixty-four
pounds fifteen shillings sixpence two farthings, also a dona-
tion of one hundred and fifty pounds, and one of three
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 379
thousan 1 pounds. Is not this a plain proof that God ia
both able and willing to help simply in answer to prayer ?
Is not human reason confounded by such instances ? When
I first began to write these exercises of my mind about
another Orphan House, I knew not that on January 4, 1
should receive a donation of three thousand pounds ; yet
I was fully assured that God was able to support one thou-
sand orphans as easily as he did the thirty whom I first
received in a rented house. Does he not, however, tell
me by all this, — Go forward, my servant, and I will help
thee ?
7. But, it might be said, suppose you were able by
prayer to obtain this large sum for building a house for
seven hundred other orphans ; and suppose you were able
to provide for them during your lifetime, — what would be-
come of this Institution after your death ? Answer : I am
quite familiar with this objection. I have heard it many
times as a reason against the way of obtaining the means
for the Scriptural Knowledge Institution, simply by trusting
in God, without any funded property, and without looking
to regular subscribers ; but my reply is this. My business
is, with all my might to serve my own generation ; in doing
so I shall best serve the next generation, should the Lord
Jesus tarry. Soon he may come again ; but, if he tarry,
and I have to fall asleep before his return, I shall not
have been altogether without profit to the generation
to come, were the Lord only to enable me to serve my own
generation. Suppose this objection were a sound one, I
ought never to have commenced the orphan work at all, for
fear of what might become of it after my death, and thus all
the hundreds of destitute children without father and mo-
ther, whom the Lord has allowed me to care for during
the last fifteen years, would not have been taken up by me.
The same argument was again and again used to Franke,
my esteemed countryman, who at Halle, in Prussia,
380 THE LIFE OF TRCTST. CHAP. X5L
menced, about A. D. 1696, the largest charitable establish-
ment for poor children that, as far as I know, exists in the
world. He trusted in God alone. He went on trusting in
God alone. And God helped him. throughout abundantly.
Simply by trust in the living God, the Institutions, resem-
bling a large street rather than a 'house, were erected, and
about two thousand children instructed in them. For
about thirty years all was going on under his own eye,
until 1727, when it pleased God to take his servant to him-
self. At his death these Institutions were directed by his
truly pious son-in-law. It is true that, at the latter part of
the last century, and during the first part of the present,
there was little real vital godliness in these. Institutions ;
still, they were a temporal blessing to many tens of thou-
sands of young persons even then. So then for several tens
of years they were carried on in a truly godly way, after
Franke's death, and when afterwards there was but
little real, vital godliness found in these schools, yet tens
of thousands of children were benefited at least for this
life. Now these Institutions have existed already one hun-
dred and fifty years, and are in existence still; and, if the
Lord Jesus tarry, are likely, humanly speaking, to exist
hereafter, as they have existed hitherto. Suppose, then,
that dear man of God, A. II. Franke, had listened to the
suggestions of unbelief, and said, I must not undertake this
work, for what will become of it after my death? — then all
the blessing which spiritually resulted from it to thousands,
and all the temporal benefits which have resulted from it
to hundreds of thousands, would have been lost. I add,
however, this. The new Orphan House has been placed in
the hands of eleven trustees, and has been properly en-
rolled in chancery, and so also, should God condescend to
honor me further in building for him this intended house
for seven hundred orphans, it would likewise be placed in
the hands of trustees and enrolled in chancery. I say one
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 381
word in conclusion on this subject : let every one take heed
lest, in caring about what will become of the next genera-
tion, he forget to serve his own generation. The latter,
each one should seek to do with his might, and thus it
should be with each succeeding generation ; then, though
we be dead, yet should we be speaking. A. H. Franke is
long since gone to his rest, but he spoke to my soul in
1826, and he is speaking to my soul now ; and to his
example I am greatly indebted in having been stirred up to
care about poor children in general, and about poor orphans
in particular.
8. The last objection which has occurred to my own
mind is, that, by building another Orphan House, I should
be in danger of being lifted up. Answer : I should be in
danger of it indeed ; and so I am in great danger, even
were I not in the least degree to go forward. Yea, the
tenth part of the honor which the Lord has condescended
to bestow upon me, and the tenth part of service with
which he has been pleased to intrust me, would be enough,
if I were left to myself, exceedingly to puff me up. I can-
not say that hitherto the Lord has kept me humble ; but I
can say that hitherto he has given me a hearty desire to give
to him all the glory, and to consider it a great condescension
on his part that he has been pleased to use me as an in-
strument in his service I do not see, therefore, that fear
of being lifted up ought to keep me from going forward in
this work ; but that I have rather to beseech the Lord that
he would be pleased to give me a lowly mind, and never
suffer me to rob him of the glory which is due to him
alone.
Reasons FOB establishing another Orphan House for
Seven Hundred Orphans. — 1. The many applications
for the admission of destitute orphans which continue to
be made, I consider as a call from God upon me to do all
that is in my power to provide a home and scripvural
382 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX,
a
education for a still greater number of orphans. Noth-
ing but positive inability to go forward ought to keep
me standing still, whilst I have almost daily fresh entrea-
ties to receive orphans. Since I began writing on this
subject in my journal, thirty more orphans have been
applied for, from two years old and upward. I cannot
refuse to help, as long as I see a door open, and opened
by God, as I consider, to help them.
2. The moral state of the poor-houses greatly influences
me to go forward. I have heard it again and again, from
good authority, that children, placed at the Unions, are
corrupted, on account of the children of vagrants, and
other very bad young people, who are in such places ; so
that many poor relatives of orphans, though unable to
provide for them, cannot bear the idea of their going there,
lest they should be corrupted. I therefore judge that,
even for the sake of keeping orphans of poor yet respect-
able people from being obliged to mix with the children
of vagabonds, I ought to do, to my utmost power, all I
can to help them. For this reason, then, I purpose, in
dependence upon the living God, to go .forward and to
establish another Orphan House for seven hundred desti-
tute children, who are bereaved of both parents. When I
write thus about ihe poor-houses, I do not wish to be
understood in the way of reproof: for I know not how
these matters could be altered ; but I simply state the fact
that thus it is.
3. In this my purpose I am the more confirmed, since I
know it to be a fact that the Orphan Houses already in ex
istence in the kingdom are by no means sufficient to admit
even the most deserving and distressing cases, and far less
all that it would be well to provide for. Moreover, there
is great difficulty connected with the admission of an
orphan into most of the ordinary orphan establishments, on
account of the votes which must be obtained, so that really
1851. A NEW VICTORY OP FAITH. 383
needy persons have neither time nor money to obtain
them. Does not the fact that there were six thousand
young orphans in the prisons of England about five years
ago call aloud for an extension of orphan institutions?
By God's help I will try to do what I can to keep poor
orphans from prison.
4. In this purpose I am still further encouraged by the
great help which the Lord has hitherto given me in this
blessed service. When I look at the small beginning, and
consider how the Lord has helped me now for more than
fifteen years in the orphan work ; and when I consider
how he has been pleased to help me through one great
difficulty after another; and when I consider, especially,
how, as with an unseen hand, I might say almost against
my will and former desires and thoughts, he has led me on
from one step to another, and has enlarged the work more
and more, — I say, when I review all this, and compare
with it my present exercise of mind, I find the great help,
the uninterrupted help which the Lord has given me for
more than fifteen years, a great reason for going forward
in this work. And this, trusting in him, I am resolved to
do.
5. A further reason for going forward in this service I
see in the experience which I have had in it. From the
smallest commencement up to the present state of the
establishment, with its three hundred orphans, all has gone
through my own hands. In the work itself I obtained the
experience. It has grown with the work. I have been
the sole director of the work, under God, from its smallest
commencement. Now this is not an every-day case. No
committee member of a society, no president or vice-
president of an institution, except they had been situated
as myself, could have this experience. Coupled with this
is the measure of gift which the Lord has been pleased to
give me for such work, and for the exercise of which I am
384 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CiiAir. XX
responsible to him. These things, in connection with the
former reasons, it appears to me, arc a call from God to go
forward in a greater degree than ever in this work.
6. The spiritual benefit of still more orphans is another
especial reason with me why I feel called to go forward.
The orphans who have been under my care hitherto were
almost all the children of parents who were naturally
weak in body, if not consumptive. The very fact of a
child being deprived of both parents when four, five, six?
or seven years old, shows that, except the parents lost
their lives by casualty, they were constitutionally weak.
On this account young orphans, generally speaking, require
particular care as to their health. In this respect I desire
to care for them; but there is more than that to be at-
tended to. I further heartily desire to keep them from the
corrupting and demoralizing effect of the lowest sort of
children in the streets arid courts and Unions. But I desire
more for them than mere decency and morality ; I desire
that they should be useful members of society, and that
the prisons of the United Kingdom should not be filled
with poor, destitute, and homeless orphans ; and we bring
them up therefore in habits of industry, and seek to in-
struct them in those things which are useful for the life
that now is. But I desire more than this for the orphans.
I cannot be satisfied with anything concerning them short
of this, that their souls be won for the Lord. For this
reason I long to have them from their early days, yea, the
younger the better, under my care, that thus, under the
care of godly nurses and teachers, they may be brought up
from their earliest days in the fear of the Lord. Now, as
this is the chief and primary aim concerning the dear
orphans, even the salvation of their souls through faith in
the Lord Jesus, I long to be more extensively used than
hitherto, even that I may have a thousand of them instead
of three hundred under my care.
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 385
7. But there is one point which weighs more strongly
with me than even the last-mentioned one. It is this :
When I began the orphan work more than fifteen years
ago, it was for the definite and especial purpose that, by
means of it, the unconverted might see, through the
answers of prayer that I received in connection with it,
that there is verily reality in the things of God ; and that
the children of God might have their faith strengthened by
means of it, and might be encouraged, in all simplicity, to
deal with God under every circumstance, and trust in him
at all times. But if this would be answered in a measure
by the state in which the orphan work has been in former
times, and more so by what it has been since the erection
of the new Orphan House, it would be still more so, by
the blessing of God, by my going forward in it to a far
greater degree than before. This point, even the glory of
God in the manifestation of his readiness to hear prayer,
has weighed especially and supremely with me in pur-
posing to enlarge the orphan work.
8. Lastly, I am peaceful and happy, spiritually, in the
prospect of enlarging the work, as on former occasions
when I had to do so. This weighs particularly with me
as a reason for going forward. After all the calm, quiet,
prayerful consideration of the subject for about eight
weeks, I am peaceful and happy, spiritually, in the
purpose of enlarging the field. This, after all the heart-
searching which I have had, and the daily prayer to be
kept from delusion and mistake in this thing, and the be-
taking myself to the word of God, would not be the case,
I judge, had not the Lord purposed to condescend to use
me more than ever in this service.
I therefore, on the ground of the objections answered,
and these eight reasons FOE enlarging the work, come to
the conclusion that it is the will of the blessed God that
his poor and most unworthy servant should yet more
33
386 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XX
extensively serve him in this work, which he is quite will*
ing to do.
Up to this day, Jan. 25, 1851, I have not spoken to one
human being about it. As yet even my dear wife knows
not about it. I purpose to keep the matter still for some
time entirely to myself, dealing with God alone about it,
in order that no outward excitement may be in the least
degree a stimulus to me. I still pray to be kept from mis-
take and delusion in this thing ; not that I think I am
mistaken or deluded, quite the reverse, but yet I would
distrust myself and cling to God, to be kept from mistakes
and delusions.
Jan. 31. For several weeks past I have now had no
doubt that the Lord would have me to serve him in the
erection and fitting up of another Orphan House for seven
hundred orphans, and I am quite decided on doing so,
under his help ; and I am now quiet about it, not because
I have the least misgiving in my own mind, but because I
know that it is most suitable that I should still for some
time continue to deal quietly with God alone about it.
March 5. Nearly five weeks have passed away since I
wrote the last paragraph, and my mind has not been once
during this time, even for a moment, in uncertainty as to
what I ought to do. It is now about fifteen weeks since I
have been especially praying about this subject, and three
months since I began first to write on the subject in my
journal, and about ten weeks since I have had any doubt
as to what is the will of the Lord concerning this service.
I believe that, altogether unworthy though I am of this
great honor, he will condescend to use me further and
more extensively than before in caring for destitute chil-
dren who are bereaved of both parents. And this I pur-
pose to do.
May 24. From the time that I began to write down
the exercises of my mind on Dec. 5, 1850, till this day,
1851. A NEW VICTORY OF FAITH. 387
ninety-two more orphans have been applied for, and
seventy-eight were already waiting for admission before.
But this number increases rapidly as the work becomes
more and more known.
On the ground of what has been recorded above, I pur-
pose to go forward in this service, and to seek to build, to
the praise and honor of the living God, another Orphan
House, large enough to accommodate seven hundred
orphans.
When I published these exercises of my mind, and made
known my purpose respecting the intended Orphan House
for seven hundred orphans, in the Twelfth Report of the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution, the following particulars
were added to what has been stated : —
1. All this time, though now six months have elapsed
since I first began to be exercised about this matter, I have
never once been led to ask the Lord for means for this
work, but have only continued day by day to seek
guidance from him as to whether I should undertake it
or not.
2. The means requisite to accomplish the building and
fitting up of a house which shall be really suitable for my
intended purposes, though the building be quite simple,
cannot be less than thirty-five thousand pounds, including
fifteen or twenty acres of land round the building for cul-
tivation by the spade, in order to obtain out of our own,
grounds all the vegetables which are so important to the
health of the children.
3. I do not mean to begin the building until I have the
means requisite in hand, just as was the case with regard
to the new Orphan House. If God will condescend to use
me in building for him another Orphan House (as I judge
he will), he will give me the means for it. Now, though I
have not on my own mind any doubt left that it is his will
that I should do so, which has been stated again and again
388 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XX.
in tlie preceding pages ; yet there is one point still want-
ing for confir nation, and that is, that he will also furnish
nie, without personal application to any one, with all the
means requisite for this new part of my service. I am the
more needing also to my own soul this last of all the proofs
that I have not been mistaken (as I firmly believe I have
not been), in order to have unquestionable assurance that,
whatever trials hereafter might be allowed to befall me in
connection with this work, I did not at my own bidding
and according to my own natural desire undertake it, but
that it was under the guidance of God. The greatness of
the sum required affords me a kind of secret joy; for the
greater the difficulty to be overcome, the more will it be
seen, to the glory of God, how much can be done by prayer
and faith ; and also because, when God himself overcomes
our difficulties for us, we have, in this veiy fact, the
assurance that we are engaged in his work, and not in
our own.
CHAPTER XXI.
UNVARYING PROSPERITY.
1850 — 1852.
DESIRES FOR MORE ENLARGED USEFULNESS GRATIFIED — A LARGE DONATION
ANTICIPATED AND RECEIVED — REVIEW OF 1851 — PERSON A L EXPERIENCE
— BUILDING FUND FOR THE SECOND NEW ORPHAN HOUSE — DOUBT RE-
SISTED— WAITING ON GOD NOT IN VAIN — REVIEW OF 1852.
AT the commencement of the year beginning with May,
1850, it was my purpose to seek help from the Lord that I
might be able, in a still greater degree than before, to assist
brethren who labor in the gospel at home and abroad,
in dependence upon God for their temporal supplies, and to
labor more than ever in the circulation of the Holy Scrip-
tures, and of simple gospel tracts.
June 11. By the sums which came in within the first
fifteen days of this period I was able to begin to carry out
the purpose I had formed ; and as the Lord enabled me,
without anxious reckoning, to go on giving out as he was
pleased to intrust me with means, so again he sent further
supplies before all was gone. It is a point of great impor-
tance in the divine life not to be anxiously reckoning about
the morrow, nor dealing out sparingly on account of pos-
sible future wants which never may come ; but to consider
that the present moment to serve the Lord only is ours,
and that the morrow may never come to us
33*
S90 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXI
April 20, 1851. During the whole of the current year,
up to this date, the Lord has so abundantly supplied me
with means that there came not one single case before me
in which it would have been desirable to help, according
to the measure of light given to me, or to extend the
work, without my having at the same time ample means
for doing so. In the midst of the great depression of the
times, which was so generally felt, and on account of
which, humanly speaking, I also might have been exceed-
ingly tried for want of means, I, on the contrary, at no
period of the work for the seventeen years previous had a
greater abundance of means. I do on purpose lay stress
upon this because I desire that it may become increas-
ingly known that there is no easier, no better, and no hap-
pier way in the end than God's way, and this in particular
also with regard to the obtaining of means simply in
ansioer to prayer, without personal application to any one.
At the beginning of the year I had more in hand for the
orphans than for many years before, under similar circum-
stances, the balance for current expenses on May 26, 1850,
being one hundred and fifty pounds seven shillings ten-
pence. Yet, much as this was in comparison with what
the balance had generally been before, how small was the
amount in reality ! About three hundred persons were
connected with the new Orphan House, who day by day
were to be provided with all they needed, besides several
apprentices who also were still to be supported. On this
account the one hundred and fifty pounds in hand would
only furnish that which was needed for about fifteen days,
as the average expenses o£ the orphan work alone were
about ten pounds daily. Place yourself, therefore, dear
reader, in my position. Three hundred persons daily at
table, and one hundred and fifty pounds in hand ! Look-
ing at it naturally, it is enough to make one tremble ; but
trusting in the living God, as by his grace I was enabled
1851. UNVARYING PROSPERITY. 39 1
to do, I had not the least trial of mind, and was assured
that God would as certainly help me as he had done four
teen years before, when the number of the orphans wai
only the tenth part as large.
Nov. 27. For seven weeks the income has been very
small, in comparison with what has been expended, both
for the orphans and for the various other objects of the
Scriptural Knowledge Institution. There has come in for
the orphans £187, 16s. 2}d., and for the other objects £62,
lls. Id.; and the expenditure has been for the orphans
during these seven weeks £477, 2s. lid., and for the various
other objects £394, 9s. Scl. Therefore altogether £871, 12s.
7d. has been expended, whilst the income altogether has
been only £250, 7s. 3|d. We have, of course, not gone
into debt, as we never order anything except we have the
means in hand for it. Nor has there been even the least
difficulty experienced with regard to means, as the Lord in
his kindness had sent in considerable sums just before this
season commenced. About three hundred and thirty per-
sons now sit down to their meals in the new Orphan House,
day by day, and the expenses for the orphans alone are
about ten pounds daily, and those for the other parts of
the work are also about ten pounds daily, so that I need to
receive after the rate of twenty pounds a day, in order to go
on with the work ; but during these forty-nine days there
has been only one single day that I have received about
twenty pounds, and for the greater part of the time only a
few pounds daily, and sometimes even only a few shillings.
But what was to be done under these circumstances? I
gave myself to prayer. God, whom I have now been ena-
bled to make my refuge, and my only refuge, for more than
twenty years, I have besought day by day. And when
now day by day I still have received only small sums, and
sometimes nothing or scarcely anything at all, the only
effect that it has had upon me has been to pray the ynore
392 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXI,
earnestly. My confidence in God is not at all shaken. I
have never had a thought that he would not help me : nor
have I even once been allowed to look upon these seven
weeks in any other way than that the Lord, for the trial of
my faith, has ordered it thus that only so little should come
hi. I am sure that, when he has tried me sufficiently, there
will come in again larger sums. In the mean time, how
good has the Lord been, not only to have given all I have
needed, but I have even now money in hand ! And as to
our stores in the new Orphan House, they are as full as
usual. We have at least one hundred and fifty sacks of
potatoes in the house, twenty sacks of flour, thirty-three
barrels of oatmeal, each containing about two hundred
pounds, about three hundred pairs of new shoes (besides
about nine hundred pairs in use), about ten tons of coals,
a large quantity of soap and rice ; and so all other parts of
the stores in proportion. Indeed, while there has been
little corning in, I have just ordered articles in the wholesale
way as formerly, when our income was perhaps four or five
times as much during the same period. My judgment is,
that it will now soon please the Lord again to send in
larger sums, as he has been pleased to exercise my faith for
,*ome time in this way. Let me see the result !
Jan. 4, 1851. This veiy day the Lord has given me d
most precious proof that he delights in our having large
expectations from him. I have received this evening the
sum of three thousand pounds, being the largest donation
which I have had as yet. I now write again that I expect
far larger sums still, in order that it may be yet more and
more manifest that there is no happier, no easier, and no
better way of obtaining pecuniary means for the work of
the Lord than the one in which I have been led. How great
my joy in God is, on account of this donation, cannot be
described ; but it is not in the least coupled with excite-
ment. I take this donation out of the hands of the living
1851. UNVARYING PROSPERITY. 393
God ; I continually look for his help, and am perfectly as-
sured that I shall have it, and therefore is my soul calm
and peaceful, without any excitement, though the donation
is so large. This donation is, however, like a voice from
heaven speaking to mo concerning a most deeply impor-
tant matter respecting which I am seeking guidance from
the Lord, the building of another Orphan House.
May 26. I am brought to the close of this period. The
work is more and more enlarging. During the last month
I have paid out for the orphans more than four hundred
and fifty pounds, and for the other objects more than five
hundred pounds, being nearly one thousand pounds during
one month ; and yet I have a greater balance left in hand,
through the Lord's kindness, than at the close of any of
the previous periods.
From May 26, 1850, to May 26, 1851, there were four
day schools in Bristol, with 286 children in them, entirely
supported\)j the funds of the Institution ; and three others
in Devonshire, Gloucestershire, and Norfolk, with 180 chil-
dren in them, were assisted. Further, one Sunday school
in Bristol, with 184 children, was entirely supported,
and two others in Devonshire and Gloucestershire, with
213 children, were assisted. Lastly, an adult school in
Bristol, with 90 persons in it, was entirely supported. The
expenses connected with all these various schools were,
during this period, £379, 17s. From the formation of the
Institution, on March 5, 1834, up to May 26, 1851, there
were 5,343 children in the various day schools in Bristol
alone, 2,379 in the Sunday school, and 1,896 persons in the
adult school, besides the thousands in the schools out of
Bristol which were assisted.
There was expended during this period, out of the funds
of the Institution, on the circulation of the Holy Scrip-
tures, £150, 16s. 5d. There were 345 Bibles sold, and 899
given away; and 30 New Testaments sold, and 413 given
394 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXI
away, during this period. From March 5, 1884, to May
26, 1851, there were circulated 7,709 Bibles and 4,442 New
Testaments.
During this year was spent of the funds of the Institu-
tion, for missionary objects, the sum of £2,000, lls. Id. By
this sum forty-five laborers in the word and doctrine in
various parts of the world were to a greater or less de-
gree assisted. The total amount of £2,000 was sent to
these forty-five servants of the Lord Jesus in 264 different
sums.
During this period £358, 7s. 3d. was expended on the
circulation of tracts, and 303,098 tracts and little books
were circulated. I was permitted to send out more tracts
than during the whole of the previous ten years taken
together. Nor must it be withheld from the reader, as
matter for thankfulness, that the Lord was pleased to allow
me to hear again and again of instances of conversion, by
means of the distribution of these tracts during this
period.
On May 26, 1850, there were 275 orphans in the new
Orphan House on Ashley Down, Bristol. On May 26,
1851, there were 300 orphans in the new Orphan House.
The total number of orphans who were under our care
from April, 1836, to May 26, 1851, is 488. There came in
altogether during this year £4,102, 14s. 9Jd. for the support
of the orphans, and £3,640, 9s. l|d. for the other objects ;
and, after having met to the full every demand with refer-
ence to the orphans, the balance of £970, 13s. ll|d.
remained in hand. Also, after having entered into every
door which the Lord was please., to set before me respect-
ing the other objects, and to do far more than during
any one year previously, the balance of £809, 10s. 6d.
remained in hand on May 26, 1851. Verily we do not
trust in the Lord in vain !
Without any one having been personally applied to for
1851. UNARYING PROSPERITY. 395
anything by me, the sum of £38,018, 4s. 6Jd. was given to
me for the orphans as the result of prayer to God from
the commencement of the work to May 26, 1851. It may
be also interesting to the reader to know that the total
amount which was given as free contributions for the other
objects from the commencement of the work to May 26,
1851, amounted to £13,988, lls. 9£d. ; and that which came
in by the sale of Bibles and tracts, and by the payments of
the children in the day schools, amounted to £2,890, 9s.
Hid.
It pleased the Lord greatly to gladden our hearts by the
working of his Holy Spirit among the orphans during this
period.
Dec. 31, 1850. During this year there have been re-
ceived into fellowship 57, and altogether, from the time
that brother Craik and I began to labor in Bristol, 1,313.
The Lord has been pleased to give me, for my personal
expenses, £402, 4s. 5d.
May 26, 1851. The reader will remember that I stated
in a previous chapter that I purposed, not in depend-
ence upon my Christian friends, nor in dependence
upon former donors, but alone in dependence upon the
living God, to enlarge the orphan work. Before I
brought before the public what I purposed to do, I gave
the record of the exercises of my mind on this subject to
a valued Christian friend to read, the only one who, be-
sides my family, knew anything of this my intention before
it came before the public. I did this particularly in order
that, after I had been waiting for several months in
secret upon God for guidance and direction concerning it,
I might also have the counsel of a prayerful,, judicious,
and cautious man of God. When this brother returned
the manuscript, he spoke to me words of encouragement
concerning this purpose, and gave me a half sovereign
towards the building fund for this house for seven hundred
39G THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XXI
destitute orphans. This was the first donation, which I
received on May 13, 1851, and which, I confess, was a great
refreshment and encouragement to me, the more so as it
came from so cautious a brother, and after I had been for
several months, through secret prayer, assured that I should
go forward.
On May 28, 1851, my intention became publicly known,
and in the evening of May 29 I received from a Christian
lady a sovereign towards the building fund.
June 1. A brother in the Lord, who gives his donations
with the letter " P.," gave me ten shillings. I also re-
ceived a sovereign. This evening I received still further
four half crowns, with very encouraging words and expres-
sions of joy that I have been led to this purpose of build-
ing another Orphan House for seven hundred more
orphans. There came to hand, also anonymously, three
shillings. Ditto an old shilling, a small American coin, and
two shillings. Also from a Christian servant in Clifton
two shillings sixpence.
June 21. Twenty-four days have now passed away since
I have been enabled, day by day, to wait with a goodly
measure of earnestness and in faith upon the Lord for
means ; but as yet only a little above twenty-eight pounds
has come in. But I am not discouraged. The less there
comes in, the more earnestly I pray, the more I look out
for answers, and the more assured I am that the Lord, in
his own time, after he has tried my faith, will send me
larger sums, and, at last, all I need.
Aug. 12. Day by day I am waiting upon the Lord for
means for this object, and generally more than once a day
am I bowing my knees before God with reference to it.
Moreover, of late I have been enabled, with increasing
earnestness, to beseech the Lord that he would be pleased
to send in means for the building fund. My soul has been
all along at peace, though only so little, as yet, compara-
1851. UNVARYING PROSPERITY. 397
tively, has come in (in all, one hundred and twenty-seven
pounds nineteen shillings ninepence) ; and though Satan
has in the most subtle way sought to shake my confidence,
and to lead me to question whether, after all, I had not
been mistaken concerning this whole matter. Yet, though
he has aimed after this, to the praise of God I have to con-
fess that he has not been allowed to triumph. I have espe-
cially besought the Lord of late that he would be pleased
to refresh my spirit by sending in some large donation for
this part of the work. Under these circumstances I
received this morning five hundred pounds for the new
building. I was not in the least excited. I look out for
means. Even that very moment, when I received this
donation, I was looking out for means, for large dona-
tions ; and I should not have been surprised if five thou-
sand pounds had come in, or more. The Lord be praised
for this precious encouragement, which has still further
quickened me for prayer !
Sept. 13. Patience and faith are still called for, and, by
God's grace, my desire is to " let patience have her perfect
work." Not one penny has come in to-day for the build-
ing fund, but five more orphans have been applied for, so
that now forty in less than one single month have been
brought before me, all bereaved of both parents, and all
very destitute. Under these circumstances, how can I but
fervently labor in prayer that the Lord would be pleased
to intrust me with means for the building another Or-
phan House for seven hundred orphans. The more I look
at things according to natural appearances and prospects,
the less likely is it that I should have the sum which is
needed ; but I have faith in God, and my expectation is
from him alone. From the beginning I depended upon
him only concerning this proposed enlargement of the
work, and therefore have I not been disappointed, though
as yet only the fortieth part of what is needed has come
34
398 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XXI.
in (eight hundred and eighty-two pounds eighteen shil
lings sevenpence halfpenny). But how soon, how very
soon can the Lord alter the aspect of things. Even
this very evening, while I am writing, he could give
me many thousand pounds. I continue, therefore, to
wait upon God, and seek to encourage my heart by his
holy word, and, while he delays giving me answers, to
be occupied in his blessed service. Of this, however, my
soul has not the least doubt, that, when the Lord shall have
been pleased to exercise my soul by the trial of faith and
patience, he will make bare his arm, and send help. The
fact that the applications for the admission of destitute
orphans are so many, does both quicken me to prayer, and
is also a great encouragement to me that the Lord will
give me the desire of my heart, to provide another home
for these destitute, fatherless and motherless children.
March 17, 1852. Day by day I am waiting upon God for
means. With full confidence, both as to the power of the
Lord to give me the means, and likewise his willingness, I
am enabled to continue to wait. But he is pleased to
exercise my faith and patience, and especially has this been
the case of late. Not more than twenty-seven pounds
eleven shillings has come in during the last four weeks for
the building fund. Yet, amidst it all, by the help of God,
my heart has been kept looking to the Lord, and expecting
help from him. ]STow to-day my heart has been greatly
refreshed by a donation of nine hundred and ninety-nine
pounds thirteen shillings fivepence. I cannot describe to
any one how refreshing this donation is to my spirit.
After having been for weeks, day by day, waiting upon the
Lord, and receiving so little comparatively, either for cur-
rent expenses or for the building fund, this answer to
many prayers is exceedingly sweet to my spirit.
May 20. There remained in hand from the former
building fund the balance of £776, 14s. 4.id., which I
1851. UNVARYING PROSPERITY. 399
added to the present building fund, so that on the evening
of May 26, 1852, I had altogether £3,530, 9s. 0£.
Supplies for the School, Bible, Missionary, and Tract
Fund, sent in answer to prayer from May 26, 1851, to
May 26, 1852. — At no time during the past eighteen
years did I begin a new period with so much money in
hand as was the case at the commencement of this. There
was a balance of £809, 10s. 6d. left for these objects. Long
before this balance was expended, however, the Lord was
pleased to send in further supplies ; so that during all the
year there did not come before me one single instance in
which, according to my judgment, it would have been
desirable to help forward schools or missionary objects, or
the circulation of the Holy Scriptures and tracts, but I had
always the means in hand for doing so.
Supplies for the Support of the Orphans sent in answer
to prayer from May 26, 1851, to May 26, 1852. — When
this period commenced, I had in hand for the current
expenses for the orphans £970, 13s. 11 Jd. We had never
had so large a balance for the other objects at the com-
mencement of any new period as was the case at tho
commencement of this, and so it was also with regard to the
orphan work. But though there was this large balance to
begin with, dependence upon God was still required day by
day, as the pecuniary help is only a very small part of
that which is needed; and even as to means, this sum
would not have lasted long, had the Lord not sent in
further supplies. This, however, he did ; and thus it was
that while there were other trials, varied and many, yet, as
to means, we experienced scarcely any difficulty at all.
During the period from May 26, 1851, to May 26, 1852,
there were entirely supported by the funds of the Institu-
tion four day schools in Bristol, with 243 poor children in
them, and three others in Devonshire, Monmouthshire, and
Norfolk, were assisted. Further, one Sunday school in
400 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP XXI
Bristol, with 243 children, was entirely supported, and two
others in Devonshire and Gloucestershire, with 230 children,
were assisted. Lastly, one adult school in Bristol, with 120
adult scholars, was entirely supported during this period.
From March 5, 1834, up to May 26, 1852, there were 5,525
children in the day schools in Bristol, 2,600 in the Sunday
school, and 2,033 grown-up persons in the adult school.
There was expended of the funds of the Institution, for
these various schools,. during this period, £360, Is. 9d.
During this period there was expended of the funds of
the Institution £207, 3s. Id. for the purpose of circulating
the Holy Scriptures, especially among the very poorest of
the poor. There were issued during this period 1,101 Bibles
and 409 New Testaments. There were altogether circulated
from March 5, 1834, up to May 26, 1852, 8,810 Bibles, and
4,851 New Testaments.
During this year there was spent of the funds of the
Institution, for missionary objects, the sum of £2,005, 7s. 5d.
By this sum fifty-one laborers in the word and doctrine, ill
various parts of the world, were to a greater or less degree
assisted.
There was laid out for the circulation of tracts, from May
26, 1851, to May 26, 1852, the sum of £356, 11s. 3]d.
There were circulated during the year 489,136 tracts.
The total number of tracts which were circulated from
the beginning up to May 26, 1852, was 1,086,366.
On May 26, 1851, there were 300 orphans in the new
Orphan House on Ashley Down, Bristol. From that day
up to May 26, 1852, there were admitted into it 27 orphans.
The total of the expenses connected with the support of
the orphans, from May 26, 1851, to May 26, 1852, was
£3,035, 3s. 4d. The total number of orphans who were under
our care from April, 1836, to May 26, 1852, was 515.
Without any one having been personally applied to for
anything by me, the sum of £42,970, 17s. 6d. was given to
1851. UNVARYING PROSPERITY. 401
me for the orphans as the result of prayer to God from the
commencement of the work up- to May 26, 1852. It may
be also interesting to the reader to know that the total
amount which was given as free contributions, for the other
objects, from the commencement of the work up to May
26, 1852, amounted to £15,976, 10s. 6|-d.; and that which
came in by the sale of Bibles and tracts, and by the pay-
ments of the children in the day schools, amounted to
£3,073, Is. 9'd. Besides this, also, a great variety and
number of articles of clothing, furniture, provisions, etc.,
were given for the use of the orphans.
Several of the orphans who left the establishment during
this year went away as believers, having been converted
some time before they left ; one also who died gave very
decided evidence of a true change of heart by faith in our
Lord Jesus ; several who in former years were under our
care, as we heard during this year, took their stand openly
on the Lord's side, and dated their first impressions to the
instructions received whilst under our care ; and, lastly, of
those under our care, there were not a few whose spiritual
state gave us joy and comfort. Thus, amidst many difficul-
ties and trials and some discouragements, we had abundant
cause to praise God for his goodness, and to go forward in
the strength of the Lord.
Dec. 31, 1851. During this year the Lord was pleased
to give me, for my personal expenses, £465, 13s. If d.
34*
CHAPTER XXII.
REAPING IN JOY.
1852 — 1854.
EXPECTING GR3AT THINGS FROM GOD— MUNIFICENT DONATION — IXCREA8
ING USEFULNESS CH THE SCRIPTURAL KNOWLEDGE INSTITUTION —
ACCESS TO GOD THrfOUGH FAITH IN CHRIST— A VOICE FROM MOUN1
LEBANON — BENEFI T OF WAITING GOD'S TIME — CAREFUL STEWARDSHIP
— FAITH, THE ONLY RELIANCE — " THIS POOR WIDOW HATH CAST IN
MORE THAN THEY ALL"— GREATER ACHIEVEMENTS OF FAITH ANTICI-
PATED — COUNSEL TO TRACT DISTRIBUTORS — A NEW AND SEVERE
TRIAL OF FAITH.
ON May 26, 1852, there was in hand toward the
erection of the second new Orphan House three
thousand five hundred and thirty pounds nine shillings
sixpence and one farthing. Donations varying in
amount from three hundred pounds to fourpence
continued to be received in answer to prayer. On
the 4th of Jan. 1853, Mr. M. writes: —
From London two shillings sixpence. Day by day I
have now been waiting upon God for means for the build-
ing fund for more than nineteen months, and almost daily
I have received something in answer to prayer. These
donations have been, for the most part, small, in compari
1853. REAPING IN JOY. 40 B
eon with the amount which will be required for the com-
pletion of this object ; nevertheless, they have shown that
the Lord, for the sake of his dear Son, listens to my sup-
plications, and to those of my fellow-laborers and helpers
in the work ; and they have been precious encouragements
to me to continue to wait upon God. I have been for
many months assured that the Lord, in his own time,
would give larger sums for this work ; and for this I have
been more and more earnestly entreating him during the
last months. Now at last he has abundantly refreshed
my spirit, and answered my request. I received to-day
the promise that, as the joint donation of several Chris-
tians, there should be paid me a donation of eight thou-
sand and one hundred pounds, for the work of the Lord
in my hands.
It is impossible to describe the spiritual refreshment
which my heart received through this donation. Day by
day, for nineteen months, I had been looking out for more
abundant help than I had had. I was fully assured that
God would h^ Ip me with larger sums ; yet the delay was
long. See how precious it is to wait upon God! See
how those who do so are not confounded ! Their faith
and patience may long and sharply be tried ; but in
the end it will most assuredly be seen that those who
honor God he will honor, and will not suffer them to be
put to shame. The largeness of the donation, whilst it
exceedingly refreshed my spirit, did not in the least sur-
prise me ; for I expect GREAT things from God. Have I
been boasting in God in vain ? Is it not manifest that it
is most precious in every way to depend upon God ? Do
I serve God for naught? Is it not obvious that the prin-
ciples on which I labor are not only applicable to the work
of God on a small scale, but also, as I have so many times
affirmed during the past nineteen years, for the most escten-
rive operations for God?
404 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXII
During the year ending May 26, 1853, nine thousand
and one pounds three shillings was received toward
the building fund, making the present amount of that
fund twelve thousand five hundred and thirty-one
pounds twelve shillings one farthing.
For the various objects of the Scriptural Knowledge
Institution, viz. for school, mission; uy, Bible, and tract pur-
poses, I had to expend during the year from May, 1852, to
May, 1853, about six hundred pounds per month, or above
seven thousand pounds in all ; but I had sufficient to meet
every demand ; and over and above I was helped by the
Lord to increase the building fund nine thousand pounds.
The current expenses of the Institution were never so great
during the previous nineteen years ; bu.t the extent of its
operations, and the means which the Lord was pleased
to send in, were also never so great.
You see, dear reader, that we are richly recompensed
for our waiting upon God. You perceive the readiness of
his heart to listen to the supplications of his children who
put their trust in him. If you have never made trial of it,
do so now. But in order to have your prayers answered,
you need to make your requests unto God on the ground
of the merits and worthiness of the Lord Jesus. You
must not depend upon your own worthiness and merits,
but solely on the Lord Jesus, as the ground of acceptance
before God, for your person, for your prayers, for your
labors, and for everything else. Do you really believe in
Jesus ? Do you verily depend upon him alone for the
salvation of your soul ? See to it well, that not the least
degree of your own righteousness is presented unto God
as a ground of acceptance. But then, if you believe in
the Lord Jesus, it is further necessary, in order that your
prayers may be answered, that the things which you ask
1853. REAPING IN JOY. 405
God should bo a such a kind that God can give them to
you, because they are for his honor and your reiil good.
If the obtaining of your requests were not for your real
good, or were not tending to the honor of God, you might
pray for a long time without obtaining what you desire.
The glory of God should be always before the children of
God, in what they desire at his hands ; and their own spir-
itual profit, being so intimately connected with the honor
of God, should never be lost sight of in their petitions.
But now, suppose we are believers in the Lord Jesus, and
suppose we make our requests unto God, depending alone
on the Lord Jesus as the ground of having them granted ;
suppose also, that, so far as we are able honestly and
uprightly to judge, the obtaining of our requests would be
for our real spiritual good, and for the honor of God ; we
yet need, lastly, to continue in prayer until the blessing is
granted unto us. It is not enough to begin to pray, nor
to pray aright ; nor is it enough to continue for a time to
pray ; but we must patiently, believingly continue in
prayer until we obtain an answer ; and, further, we have
not only to continue in prayer unto the end, but we have
also to believe that God does hear us, and will answer our
prayers. Most frequently we fail in not continuing in
prayer until the blessing is obtained, and in not expecting
the blessing. As assuredly as in any -individual these
various points are found united together, so assuredly will
answers be granted to his requests.
During the year 1852-53, the expense of the support of
the orphans was fully met by unsolicited donations. Two
or three particulars only will be given.
June 29, 1852. To-day I received one of the most
remarkable donations which I ever had. I give tha
whole account, without the name of the donor.
406 THE LIFE OF TRUST. C*AP. XXII,
LYONS, JU>-E 24, 1852,
DEAR BROTHER IN CHRIST:
It is now several years that I read with great interest, and I hope
with some benefit to my soul, the account of your labors and experi-
ences. Ever since then your work was the object of many thoughts
and prayers, and I gave many copies of your book to Christian friends,
One of them has read it in Syria, on Mount Lebanon, where he is
for commercial business ; and, whilst praying for you and your dear
orphans, the Lord put it in his heart to send you two pounds, to
which my husband added two others ; and we beg you to accept
that small offering in the name of the Lord. If you have published
anything of the Lord's dealings with you since the year 1844, we
shall be very happy to receive it. You could forward it to Messrs.
* * * *, London, for * * * * of Lyons. And now, dear brother,
may the grace and peace of the Lord rest on you and your dear
home's inhabitants.
Affectionately yours in the Lord,
* * « *
I have had donations from Australia, the East Indies, the
West Indies, the United States, Canada, from the Cape of
Good Hope, from France, Switzerland, Germany, Italy, etc. ;
and now comes also this donation from Mount Lebanon,
with the prayer of a Christian brother whose name I never
heard nor know even now. See, dear reader, tbis is the
way in which the Lord has helped me in this precious
service for twenty-two years. With my fellow-laborers, or
without them, and they without me, our prayers are offered
up unto the Lord for help, and he is pleased, for Jesus'
sake, to listen to our supplications, and to influence the
hearts of some of his children, known to us or not, to send
us help. The donors may be rich or poor ; they may live
near, or at a distance of more than ten thousand miles j
they may give much or little ; they may have often given
before, or never; they maybe well known to us, or not at
all : in these and many other things there may be constant
variations; but God continually helps us; we are never
1852. REAPING IN JOY. 407
confounded. And why not? Simply because we are
enabled by the grace of God to put our trust in him for
what we need.
Oct. 9. This morning Luke vii. came in the course of
my reading before breakfast. While reading the account
about the centurion and the raising from death of the
widow's son at Nam, I lifted up my heart to the Lord
Jesus thus : " Lord Jesus, thou hast the same power now.
Thou canst provide me with means for thy work in my
hands. Be pleased to do so." About half an hour after-
wards I received two hundred and thirty pounds fifteen
shillings ; also one shilling. This two hundred and thirty
pounds fifteen shillings was left at my disposal, as most
needed. I took one half of it for the current expenses for
the orphans, and the other half for the other objects. I
am now amply provided for meeting the demands of this
day.
The joy which such answers to prayer afford cannot be
described. I was determined to wait upon God only, and
not to work an uhscriptural deliverance for myself. I have
thousands of pounds for the building fund ; but I would
not take of it, because it was once set apart for that object.
There is also a legacy of one hundred pounds for the or-
phans two months overdue, in the prospect of the payment
of which the heart might be naturally inclined to use some
money from the building fund, to be replaced by the legacy
money, when it comes in ; but I would not thus step out
of God's way of obtaining help. At the very time when
this donation arrived, I had packed up one hundred pounds
which I happened to have in hand, received for the build-
ing fund, in order to take it to the bank, as I was deter-
mined not to touch it, but to wait upon God. My soul does
magnify the Lord for his goodness !
This last paragraph is copied out of my journal, written
408 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CnAP.XXH
down at the time. I add a few words more to the last
sentences.
The natural mind is ever prone to reason^ when we ought
to believe / to be at icorJe, when we ought to be quiet / to
go our own way, when we ought steadily to walk on in
God's ways, however trying to nature. When I was first
converted, I should have said, What harm can there be to
take some of the money which has been put by for the
building fund ? God will help me again after some time
with means for the orphans, and then I can replace it.
Or, there is this money due for the legacy of one hundred
pounds. This money is quite sure ; may I not, therefore,
on the strength of it, take some of the money from the
building fund, and, when the legacy is paid, replace the
money which I have taken ? From what I have seen of
believers, I know that many would act thus. But how
does it work, when we thus anticipate God, by going our
own way ? We bring, in many instances, guilt on our con-
science ; but if not, we certainly weaken faith instead of
increasing it ; and each time we work thus a deliverance of
our own we find it more and more difficult to trust in God,
till at last we give way entirely to our natural fallen reason,
and unbelief prevails. How different, if one is enabled to
wait God's own time, and to look alone to him for help
and deliverance! When at last help comes, after many
seasons of prayer it may be, and after much exercise of
faith and patience it may be, how sweet it is, and what a
present recompense does the soul at once receive for trust-
ing in God, and waiting patiently for his deliverance!
Dear Christian reader, if you have never walked in this path
of obedience before, do so now, and you will then know
experimentally the sweetness of the joy which results
from it.
Oct. 12. By sale of rags and bones twelve shillings
sixpence. I copy literally from the receipt book. We
1853. REAPING IN JOY. 409
seek to make the best of everything. As a steward of
public money, I feel it right that even these articles should
be turned into money; nor could we expect answers to our
prayers if knowingly there were any waste allowed in
connection with this work. For just because the money is
received from God, simply in answer to prayer only, there-
fore it becomes us the more to be careful in the use of it.
From Dec. 20, 1852, to Jan. 4, 1853, we had nothing in
advance of our wants. Means came in only as they were
required for pressing needs. But on the 4th January, we
received, as stated under another head, the largest donation
I ever had, of which I took six hundred pounds for the
support of the orphans. These facts I state, in order to give
a practical illustration that those are entirely mistaken
who suppose that the work is now no longer a work of
faith, as it used to be in former years. It is true, we have
now a larger income than we used to have in the years
1838, 1839, and 1840; but it is also true that our expenses
are three times as great. We have no regular income
now, even as we had not then. We ask no human being
now for help ; even as we did not then. We depend alone
upon God, by his grace ; even as we did then. Who is
there in the whole world who will state that I ever asked
him for help in this orphan work, from its commencement,
on Dec. 9, 1835, up till now ? Now, as we have no funds
to live upon; as we have no regular subscribers or donors
upon whom we could depend ; as we never ask help from
man, but God alone ; and as, finally, we never did go into
debt for this work, nor do we now : why is it not now a
work of faith, as formerly ? Will those who say it is not,
place themselves in the position in which I was, when, at
the close of the year 1852, I had not two pounds left, and
about three hundred and thirty persons were day by day
to be provided for, with all they need, and prove whether
it is now anything else than a work of faith ? But per-
35
410 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXII.
haps I have said too much about this. For every one,
except those who are determined not to see, will have no
difficulty in perceiving that now, as formerly, one could
only be kept from being overwhelmed in such a position,
by looking day by day to the Lord, and that not merely
for pecuniary supplies, but for help under the number-
less difficulties which continually are met with in such
a work.
How can I sufficiently praise, and adore, and magnify
the Lord for his love and faithfulness in carrying me thus
from year to year through this his service, supplying me
with all I need in the way of means, fellow-laborers, men-
tal strength, and, above all, spiritual support ! But for his
help and support I should be completely overpowered in
a very short time ; yet, by his help I go on, and am very
happy, spiritually, in my service ; nor am I now generally
worse in health than I was twenty years ago, but rather
better.
During the year 1852-53, there were four day schools,
with 235 children in them, entirely supported by the funds
of the Institution. Further, one Sunday school in Bristol,
with 150 children, was entirely supported, and three others
in Devonshire, Somersetshire, and Gloucestershire, with
280 children, were assisted. Lastly, one adult school, with
103 adult scholars, was entirely supported by the funds of
the Institution. There were under our care, from March
5, 1834, to May 26, 1853, in the various day schools 5,686
children, in the Sunday schools 2,673 children, and in the
adult school 2,132 persons. There was expended of the
funds of the Institution during this year, for the various
schools, £349, 12s. lid.
During this year there was laid out of the funds of the
Institution, on the circulation of the Holy Scriptures,
£-131, 5s. lid., and there were circulated 1,666 Bibles and
1,210 New Testaments. There were circulated from March
1853. KE APING IN JOT. 411
5, 1834, up to May 26, 1853, 10,476 Bibles, and 6,061 New
Testaments.
For several years past this part of the work has appeared
more and more important to me on account of the fearful
attempts which have been made by the powers of darkness
to rob the church of Christ of the Holy Scriptures. I
have on this account sought to embrace every opportunity
to circulate the Holy Scriptures in England, Ireland, Can-
ada, British Guiana, the East Indies, China, Australia, etc.
Every open door which the Lord was pleased to set before
me in these or other parts of the world, I have joyfully
entered ; yea, I have counted it a privilege, indeed, to be
permitted of God to send forth his Holy Word. Many
servants of Christ, in various parts of the world, have
assisted me in this service, through whose instrumentality
copies of the Holy Scriptures have been circulated.
During this year there was spent of the funds of the
Institution for missionary objects £2,234, 2s. 6d. By this
sum fifty-four laborers in the word and doctrme, in vari-
ous parts of the world, were to a greater or less degree
assisted.
There was laid out for the circulation of tracts, from
May 26, 1852, to May 26, 1853, the sum of £555, 16s. 7 id.;
and there were circulated within this year 733,674 tracts.
The total number of tracts which were circulated up to
May 26, 1853, was 1,820,040. From Nov. 19, 1840, to
May 10, 1842, the first period that the circulation of tracts
was in operation in connection with the Scriptural Knowl-
edge Institution for Home and Abroad, there were circu-
lated 19,609 ; from May 26, 1851, to May 26, 1852, 489,136 ;
and during this period 733,674.
At the beginning of this period there were 300 orphans in
the new Orphan House on Ashley Down, Bristol. During
the year there were admitted into it 13 orphans, making 313
412 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXII.
in all. The total number of orphans who were under oui
care from April, 1836, to May 26, 1853, was 528.
"Without any one having been personally applied to for
anything ly me, the sum of £55,408, 17s. 5ul. was given to
me for the orphans, as the result of prayer to God, from
the commencement of the work up to May 26, 1853. It
may be also interesting to the reader to know that the
total amount which was given for the other objects, from
the commencement of the work up to May 26, 1853,
amounted to £19,163, 14s. lid.; and that which came in
by the sale of Bibles and tracts, and by the payments of
the children in the day schools, amounted to £3,490, 7s. l?d.
Besides this, also, a great variety and number of articles of
clothing, furniture, provisions, etc., were given for the use
of the orphans.
The expenses in connection with the support of the
300 orphans and the apprentices during this year were
£3,453, 15s. l]d.
Dec. 31, 1852. During this year there have been re-
ceived into fellowship 35 believers. The Lord has been
pleased to give unto me £445, 8s. 82 d.
My brother-in-law, Mr. A. N. Groves, of whom mention
has been made in the first part of this Narrative, as having
been helpful to me by his example wrhen I began my
labors in England in 1829, in that he, without any visible
support, and without being connected with any missionary
society, went with his wife and children to Bagdad, as a
missionary, after having given up a lucrative practice of
about one thousand five hundred pounds per year, returned
in autumn 1852, from the East Indies, a third time, being
exceedingly ill. He lived, however, till May 20, 1853,
when, after a most blessed testimony for the Lord, he fell
asleep in Jesus in my house.
I hive already stated that on May 26, 1853, I had on
EEAPIXG IN JOY. 413
hand toward building premises large enough for the accom-
modation of 700 children, the sum of £12,531, 12s. Old.
A single circumstance will illustrate the widely
diverse sources from which donations are received,
as well as the great disparity in amount.
Jan. 17, 1854. From S. R. and E. R., two poor factory
girls, near Stroud, Is. 7d. This day I also received the
promise that there should be paid to me, for the work of
the Lord in my hands, £5,207, to be disposed of as I might
consider best.
The whole amount received for the new Orphan House,
during the year closing May 26, 1854, was £5,285, 17s. 5d.,
which made the total of £17,816, 19s. 5£d. in hand on
May 26, 1854.
During this year the current expenses for the various
objects of the Scriptural Knowledge Institution for Home
and Abroad amounted to £7,507, Os. lljd., being £471, 8s.
lid. more than during any previous year; yet the Lord
not only enabled me to meet them all, but to add the sum
of £5,285, 7s. 5d. to the building fund.
There is yet a large sum required before I shall be enabled
to build another house for 700 orphans; nor have I now, any
more than at the first, any natural prospect of obtaining
what is yet needed ; but my hope is in the living God.
When I came to the conclusion that it was the will of God
that I should build another Orphan House, I had not only
no natural prospect of obtaining the £35,000 which would
be needed for this object, but also I had no natural prospect
of being able to provide for the necessities of the three
hundred orphans already under my care. Three years
have eLipsed since then, and I have had all I needed for
them, amounting to about £10,500 ; and £17,816, 19s. 5]d.
I have received for the building fund. May I not wel1
35*
414 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XXII
trust in the Lord for what is yet needed for the building
fund ? By his grace I will do so, and delight in doing so ;
for I know that at last all my prayers will be turned into
praises concerning this part of the service.
There is one point which is particularly an encourage-
ment to me to go on waiting upon the Lord for the remain-
der of the means which are required, viz : applications for
the admission of orphans continue to be made. On May
26, 1853, there were 480 orphans waiting for admission.
Since then 181 more have been applied for, making in all
661. These children are from three months old and
upwards, and all bereaved of both parents by death.
During the year now under review I received the fol-
lowing donation for the missionary laborers, under circum-
stances of peculiar interest.
On Aug. 9, 1853, 1 received a letter from a Christian
brother, accompanied with an order for eighty-eight pounds
two shillings sixpence on his bankers, of which three
pounds two shillings sixpence were the proceeds of an
orphan box in a meeting-place of believers, and eighty-five
pounds from a poor widow who had sold her little house,
being all her property, and who had put ninety pounds,
the total amount of what she had received, into that
orphan box two months before, on June 9, 1853. In this
box the money had been for some time, without its being
known, till the orphan box was opened, and the ninety
pounds with a few lines without name were found in it.
As, however, the fact of her intending to sell the little
house, and her intention of sending me the money for the
Lord's work, had been known to the brother who sent me
the money, he did not feel free to send it to me without
remonstrating with her through two brethren, whom he
sent with the money, offering it again to her ; for he knew
her to be very poor, and feared that this might be an
act of excitement and therefore be regretted afterwards.
1853. REAPING IN JOY. 415
These brethren could not prevail on her to receive back
the money, but they did persuade her to receive back five
pounds of the amount, and then the brother referred to
felt no longer free to keep the money from me, and hence
sent me the eighty-five pounds.
On the receipt of this, I wrote at once to the poor godly
widow, offering her the travelling expenses for coming
to Bristol, that I might have personal intercourse with
her ; for I feared lest this should be an act of excitement,
and the more so, as she had received back five pounds of
the sum. This sister in the Lord, a widow of about sixty
years of age, came to Bristol, and told me in all simplicity
how that ten years before, in the year 1843, she had pur-
posed that if ever she should come into the possession of
the little house in which she lived with her husband, she
would sell it, and give the proceeds of it to the Lord.
About five years afterwards her husband died, and she,
having no children, nor any one having particular claim
upon her, then sought to dispose of her little property, as
had been her mind all those years before. However,
one difficulty after another prevented her being able to
effect a sale. At last she felt in particular difficulty on ac-
count of her inability to pay the yearly ground-rent of the
little house and garden, and she asked the Lord to enable
her to sell the property, in order that she might be able
to carry out her desire which she had had for ten years, to
give to him the proceeds of this her possession. lie now
helped -her. The house was sold, the money paid, and she
put the whole ninety pounds into the orphan box for me,
oeing assured that the Lord would direct me how best
'he money might be used for him. I still questioned her
again and again, to find out whether it was not excitement
which had led her to act as she had done; but I not only
saw that her mind had been fully decided about this act
for ten years before, but that she also was able to answei
416 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXII.
from the word of God all the objections which I purposely
made, in order to probe her, whether she had intelligently
and from right motives acted in what she had done. At
last I was fully satisfied that it was not from impulse, nor
under excitement, that she had given the money. I next
stated to her something like this : " You are poor, and you
are about sixty years old, therefore decreasing in strength,
and may you not therefore keep this money for yourself? "
Her reply was, as nearly as I remember, something like
this : " God has always provided for me, and I have no
doubt he will do so in future also. I am able to work and
to earn my bread as well as others, and am willing to work
as a nurse, or in any other way." What could I say
against this ? This is just what a child of God would say,
and should say. But the greatest of all the difficulties to
the accepting of the eighty-five pounds remained in my
mind, and I state it, as I relate the whole for the profit of
the reader. It was this. The house had been sold for ninety
pounds. The whole amount had been put into the box,
but, on the persuasion of those two brethren who were
requested to remonstrate with this widow, she had been
induced to take back five pounds out of the ninety
pounds. I therefore said to myself, might she not be will-
ing, after a time, to take back the whole ninety pounds ;
how, therefore, can I feel happy in accepting this money ?
On this account I particularly laid stress upon this point,
and told her that I feared she might regret her act alto-
gether after some time, as she had taken back this five
pounds. I now learned the circumstances under which
she had been induced to take back this five pounds.
The two brethren who had called on her for the pur-
pose of pointing out to her the propriety of receiving back
again the ninety pounds, or part of it, told her that Barna-
bas sold his land, but afterwards lived with others on that
which he and others had thrown into the common stock*
1853. REAPING IN JOT. 411
and that, therefore, she might receive at least part of tho
ninety pounds back again, if she would not take the
whole. She then said to herself that, " as a child of God,
she might take the children's portion," and, as she had
given to God this ninety pounds, she might receive five
pounds back again. She told me that she considered the
brethren had shown her from the Holy Scriptures what
she might do, and therefore she had taken this five pounds.
I did not myself agree with the judgment of those breth-
ren who had said this (as there is no evidence that Barnabas
ever was supported out of the common stock, the proceeds
of the sale of houses and lands, out of which the poor
were supported) ; but I purposely said nothing to the
widow,*lest she should at once be induced to give me
this five pounds also. She had, however, this five pounds
untouched, and showed it to me; and before she left
she would make me take one pound of it for the bene-
fit of the orphans, which I did not refuse, as I had no
intention of keeping the eighty-five pounds. She also
gave me a sixpence for the orphans, which some one had
given her for herself, a few days before.
I now asked her, as this matter concerning the retaining
of the five pounds was satisfactorily explained, as far as it
respected her own state of heart, what she wished me to
do with the money, in case I saw it right to keep it. Her
reply was that she would leave that with me, that God
would direct me concerning it ; but that, if she said any
thing at all about it, she should most like it to be used foi
the support of brethren who labor in the w.ord without
any salary, and who hazard their lives for the name of
Christ. She wished me to have a part of the money ; but
this I flatly refused, lest I should be evil spoken of in this
matter. I then offered to pay her travelling expenses, aa
she had come to me, which she would not accept, as sho
did not stand in need of it. In conclusion, I told her that
418 THE LIFE OF TRUST. CHAP. XXII
I would now further pray respecting this matter, and con-
sider what to do concerning it. I then prayed with this
dear, godly woman, commended her to God, separated
from her, and have not seen her since.
I waited from Aug. 9, 1853, to March 7, 1854, when I
wrote to her, offering her back again the whole eighty-five
pounds, or a part of it. On March 9, 1854, just seven
months after I had received the money, and just nine
months after she had actually given it, and ten years and
nine months after she had made the resolution to give her
house and garden to God, I heard from her, stating that
she was of the same mind as she had been for years. I
therefore disposed of the money, to aid such foreign mis-
sionary brethren as, according to the best of my knowl-
edge, resembled most the class of men whom she wished
to assist.
The reasons why I have so minutely dwelt upon this cir-
cumstance are : 1. If, as a steward of the bounties of the
children of God, I should be blamed for receiving from a
poor widow almost literally her all, it may be seen in what
manner I did so. To have refused on March 9, 1854, also,
would be going beyond what I should be warranted to do.
2. I desired, also, to give a practical illustration that I only
desire donations in God's way. It is not the money only
I desire ; but the money received in answer to prayer, in
God's order. 3. This circumstance illustrates how God
helps me often in the most unexpected manner. 4. I have
also related this instance that there may be a fresh proof
that even in these last days the love of Christ is of con-
straining power, and may work mightily, as in the days of
the apostles. I have witnessed many such instances as this,
in the twenty years during which I have been occupied in
this my service. Let us give thanks to God for such cases,
and let us seek for grace rather to imitate such godly men
and women, than think that * hey are going too far.
1854. REAPING IN JOY. 419
I cannot, however, dismiss this subject, without com-
mending this poor widow to the prayers of all who love
our Lord Jesus, that she maybe kept humble, lest, thinking
highly of herself, on account of what she has been enabled
to do, by the grace of God, she should not only lose blessing
in her own soul, but this circumstance should become a
snare to her. Pray also, believing reader, that she may
never be allowed to regret what she has done for the
Lord.
After giving in detail the sources and manner of
supply for tho maintenance of the orphans during
twenty-four days, Mr. M. adds: —
The particular end why I have been so minute, is, to
show that the work is now, as much as ever, a work carried
on entirely in dependence upon the living God, who alone
is our hope, and to whom alone ice look for help, and who
never has forsaken us in the hour of need. There is, how-
ever, one thing different with reference to this year, when
compared with former years, and that is, that, while our
trials of faith during this year were just as great as in pre-
vious years, the amount needed in former times was never
so great as during this year, especially as the bread during
the greater part of this year was about twice as dear as for
several years before.
But then, it may be said, If you have had this trial of
faith, with these three hundred orphans, why do you seek
to build another Orphan House for seven hundred more,
and thus have a thousand to care for? Will you not have
still greater trials of faith ?
My reply is: 1. God has never failed me all the twenty
years of this my service. 2. I am going on as easily now,
with three hundred orphans, as with thirty, the number with
which I commenced. Their number is ten times as largo
420 THE LIFE OP TRUST. CHAP. XXII.
as it was at the first ; but God has always helped me.
3. Trials of faith were anticipated, yea, were one chief end
of the work, for the profit of the church of Christ at large.
4. I had courage given me to go forward, solely in depend-
ence upon God, being assured that he would help me ; yet
I waited in secret upon him for six months before I made
this my intention known, in order that I might not take a
hasty step ; and I have never regretted my having gone
forward. 5. But it needs to be added that the very abun-
dance which the Lord gave me at the time, when my mind
was exercised about this matter, was a great confirmation
to me that I had not mistaken his mind. And even during
this year, how great has been his help ; for the income for
the work altogether has been twelve thousand seven hun-
dred and eighty-five pounds fifteen shillings sevenpence
halfpenny. I am, therefore, assured that the Lord will, in
his own time, not only allow me to build another Orphan
House, but that he will also, when he shall have been pleased
to fill it, find the means to provide for these children.
During this year four day schools, with 202 children,
were entirely supported by the funds of the Institution.
Further, one Sunday school in Bristol, with 137 children,
was entirely supported, and* three others in Devonshire,
Somersetshire, and Gloucestershire, with 300 children, were
assisted. Lastly, one adult school, with 154 adult scholars,
was entirely supported. The total amount which was spent
during this year in connection with these schools was £359,
15s. 10 Jd. The number of all the children who were under
our care merely in the schools which were entirely sup-
ported by this Institution, from March 5, 1834, to May 26,